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Posted
I wants sex with girls at works. MAKE IT SO.

 

I was about to make a quip about disguising yourself as an adorable fluffy animal to win their affections, but then I remembered who I was talking too. So I suppose, just be yourself. It's the same thing anyway. :p

Posted
Thank you! That's what I have been saying for years, but no one listens. The bottom line is that it looks shit the way it is, and a simple change is all it would take to fix it.

 

Its not simple. I tried numerous ways and the best solution we can have is the stretchable.

 

It was the Milton Keynes one. Don't get me started on MK... ''Where character went to die''.

 

Only been once but MK is an interesting place within contemporary history. First man-made town (or whatever the technical term is) :heh:

 

I wanna go to Ikea though. I need cheap furniture and I don't trust Argos as theirs always breaks.

 

I want sex with girls from anywhere. MAKE IT SO! (Catholic Countries would be preferable though)

 

I ain't had sex in so long Tony Blair was still the PM when I last got laid.

 

Damn why am I making jokes at my own expense!

 

If ever there was a reason to note vote for Gordon Brown then this is it!

 

I think I may be able to track down Nazhgalia's number. Who wouldn't want a piece?

 

Nazhgalia-arrested-development-1268580_500_281.jpg

 

Today has been weird. Went to the same shopping centre I've been to too many times recently with my mother which meant getting the bus rather than walking. And yet, I would have still been quicker to walk the near-on three miles :p Anyway went to sort her phone out and there was a girl in the O2 shop which was on the verge of attractive, just something about her... Really nice and helpful anywho.

 

My dad informed me this morning his mother has broken a bone in her foot a while ago and was like "oh you should probably ring her". I hate how he is making me look like a bad grandson as I've told him numerous times to let me know when he's going to see her and he never does. And its three trains and a bus to get to where she lives.

 

Then my uncle rang (slightly buzzed I believe/presume as that side of the family is always slightly buzzed) offering me advice (or at least trying to) and it was just weird. Like whenever my father tries to talk seriously to me, I'm not used to either of them taking an interest.

 

And finally my little brother took us all out for a meal because he couldn't be bothered to cook and my nan and grandad (who he usually rings up on a Sunday and goes "can I come for dinner?") are on holiday. Weird.

Posted
Only been once but MK is an interesting place within contemporary history. First man-made town (or whatever the technical term is) :heh:

 

I wanna go to Ikea though. I need cheap furniture and I don't trust Argos as theirs always breaks.

If you want a bland city and a bland shop, then they're perfect for you.

Posted

Sighs my day.....

I woak up eat ceral very stressfull 2day because its just boring so im just ending the day out with 4hours of bomberman blast!!!!!!!!!!!! Yay

Posted
If you want a bland city and a bland shop, then they're perfect for you.

 

Milton Keynes, the sunniest, happiest place in the world.

 

It's like Margate, but without a beach.

Posted
First man-made town

 

As opposed to all those naturally occuring towns? I saw a town made entirely of brambles once. It was a bit shit if I'm honest.

Posted

I accidently charged a woman £6 for Popcorn instead of £4, ah well! :p

 

In other news the neighbourino's were having a BBQ today so we (the family) went over there and basically munched on their food and left or at least I did my parents socialised.

 

Work was fun I created a monster (cause nobody wants to see Marshall no more, They want Shady, I'm chopped liver) out of Blu Tac and then A man on a sofa and then a dice. :heh:

Posted
I Am Never Going To IKEA Again.

 

If I want my soul destroyed, I can go to work.

I tried to kill myself in IKEA once.

 

I hate the one in Edinburgh isn't divided into sections at all, it's just one long hallway with EVERYTHING in it.

 

There's not pause for relief. I hated.

Did you at least get a handful of pencils?

Whats wrong with Ikea?

It smells lovely [not as lovely as a pet shop] and the stuff looks lovely.

Like I say, there's no relief. At least in my one, it's one long hall. You have no control over what you want to look at, you have to trek through the never-ending twisty turns and horizons that never end until you reach the chekout.

So you're not a fan of Toys R' Us either?

Posted
I was about to make a quip about disguising yourself as an adorable fluffy animal to win their affections, but then I remembered who I was talking too. So I suppose, just be yourself. It's the same thing anyway. :p

I'm sure there's some sort of compliment there.

Posted

I think I may have spilt beer on my Walkman and broken it. I've got it under my lamp to warm it up and hopefully get rid of the moisture, if it doesn't work I'll have to pull my amazing Reverse-Mini-Fridge-Switcharoo plan.

Posted
I wants sex with girls at works. MAKE IT SO.

 

Ask for their names. They will feel treasured. Once you know their names, entry to the point of Vajayjay should be relatively simple.

 

I joke! Its a long and painful process. Apparently, women won't sleep with anyooooone. I know! Crazy talk. In Newport, the woman pay YOU to sleep with them. Its a very crazy world, Vajayseven. The way to make love to a woman's heart is to get to know them. Woo them with your knowledge of the cider and all the places to drink in Brighton. "ouhhh! You've been to Brighton? That magical place where the clouds are made out of real cotton wool and the streets are lubricated with the blood of heavenly creatures such as the unicorn and the tortoise? You've been there? Take me there, Jay. Take me now!"

 

Woo the women. Get to know them, and promise them a life of comfort, hot lovings and Anniversary Anal Sex. AAS. Up the AAS.

 

I've been posting less for the last few weeks, so I've forgotten allll of the rules and what you can and can't post, or about beeeeing sensiiiible. Had a great time with Ine and feel a bit lonely now that I'm not with her. But, the time we had together was excellent, and it really was such a great time. I'm looking back through our photos and we've got some good memories from this summer. :)

 

Today, I went to a friend's house for a little meetup and we ate pizza and little snacks and just chatted. Her and her girlfriend have two little kittens and they were running about the house like crazy cats. They're so energetic and young. Just like Maase.

Posted

My other best friend's B'day celebrations (meaning the third member of my besties group, along with Chair) at a posh restaurant tonight. great, lovely food, vert funny.

 

then planned on going to some club tha twas mildly easy to get into, but of c ourse it was "student i.d" nght, so I was KB'd doubly. And yes, I'm now the last person in our "group" to be 17. I fucking hate it. Everyone's gone to UNI byu he time I'm 18 as well.

 

So I'm at home eatying a pain au choclat listening to Portishead instead of at a club.

Posted

I went to IKEA last week. An utterly insane place. I was looking at one of the posters they have dotted around, it showed a smiling Swede proclaiming the eternal value of good design. I looked down at what he had designed; it was an orange cardboard box. That was when I knew that this was hell.

 

On the plus side, I overheard the most bizarre conversation while walking round. One woman saying to another "so then the fish just leapt up and sucked her nose". I didn't hear any more, but I wish I had.

 

Anyway on to today, I need a haircut for tomorrow when I do a presentation to about 60 people. But it's bank holiday Monday so I'm going to have to go to a place I don't normally go to, which makes me apprehensive. Having a shit haircut will do nothing to calm nerves tomorrow.

Posted

I went to Ikea (belfast) once before.

 

I found it to be quite the experience. The whole reference numbers thing really fried my head. Oh god. Then the ones that said you had to get assistance with... well there was no fucking assistance to be had. Useful, right? But saying that they do have some awesome basic furniture. And cheap too. Can't complain..

 

Their food is so so good :3 Meatballs and chips were out of this world. And the person at the till gave me change for a 20 when I gave him a 10..

Posted

Not quite everybody dear. Haha!

 

Anyway I haven't really posted all that much recently. I'm not entirely sure why, I just cannot for the life of me be bothered to!

 

Went home a few days ago to pick up my first computer chair ever (oh my its so comfortable and I slide around my room for funsies). Found out they'd planned another france trip with some friends, apprently they regretted making the trip, as they always do, I think its mostly because of a certain couple friends of theirs. They do nothing but complain and considering the effort my parents have made to make the trip possible..you'd think they'd be abit less annoying, alas there's always somebody hard to please!

 

Room at home has been re-vamped, dad spent an entire day moving my tiny room at home around and it looks awesome, I also get to pick the paint I want - YELLOW BABY! I decided I was sick of blue, green was out, purple is my room at uni, I couldn't have red..so yellow it is!

 

Spent abit of time with the estranged housemate today, let her use my printer of all things, she scares me, I'm not sure why as shes really nice person. Recently she's been cleaning up after herself, making my life alot less stressful all round.

 

Oh! I finally like somebody, makes a damn change if you ask me, I'm not sure anything will come of it, but y'know, nice to know I can actually find people attractive again, the nicer guys and all that.

 

Yeah, lief = borings.

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