Has Society Become Too Inhibited?

[Grazza]

This is a bit of a rambling post, but I had a massage the other day. It was enjoyable, yet disappointing. Let me just say I'm not naïve and knew it wouldn't include the groin or nipples (though I honestly don't know why that would be such a bad area to rub over). The masseuse did my glutes, but only from above and only about halfway down. Same goes for the pecs. She did my quads, but not all the way to the groin. Worst of all, I was wrapped up the whole time and my torso/abdomen was not done at all.

 

Now, I do realise it was not a "massage parlour", but I never knew a standard massage would be so inhibited (I asked and paid for a "Full Body Massage"!) I've asked about this on specialist forums and apparently this is the standard way now. What a shame. Apparently some people are "ashamed of their bodies". Well, don't go for a massage then! It's someone rubbing your body!

 

Another example is swimwear. When I was young, we all wore normal swimming trunks (now known by the brand name "Speedo"). This style is by far the most comfortable and best for swimming, and yet now they are called "budgie smugglers" and seen as a bad thing.

 

All this has made me think... Nowadays hardcore pornography is so easily available (please don't go into details about this), has it made us perverts in private and prudes in public? Has it made women think all men are perverts? Has it made the sexes dislike each other? Please don't misunderstand me: I am neutral about pornography. I neither dislike it nor regularly use it; it just struck me that we can see so much now, yet are prudish in public. When I was young it was limited to top shelf magazines - "naughty but nice", in my opinion.

 

Or perhaps it's nothing to do with pornography at all (I am certainly not against normal porn). Is this some other cultural change? Or is it something I'm just imagining?

[Magnus]

They should put that last part on your tombstone.

 

Graeme 'Grazza' Gunderson

19XX-20XX

He was not against normal porn

[Jon]

I wrote a long post but deleted it, wasn't sure it was socially acceptable.

[Ramar]

Unless you're a professional swimmer, there's no need for you to be wearing Speedos.

[Goafer]

Unless you're a professional swimmer, there's no need for you to be wearing Speedos.

 

Tell that to this guy:

 

[bob]

I don't think the fall from grace of Speedos has anything to do with inhibition, it's just fashion. People wore them a lot during the 80's and so everyone relates them as the trunks worn by their parents and older generations, (which just ain't cool).

 

As for the other thing, i think you're just imagining it.

 

I've never had a full body massage, but i think if i did i wouldn't expect them to rub my full body. It just means more than just arms, or legs, or neck etc.

[Grazza]

They should put that last part on your tombstone.

 

Graeme 'Grazza' Gunderson

19XX-20XX

He was not against normal porn

 

That'd be great, especially if you added on a few centuries.

 

Unless you're a professional swimmer, there's no need for you to be wearing Speedos.

 

Right, but why is this about "need"? What is actually negative about them? Society wears underwear for valid reasons (hygiene) - I'm not a naturist and don't understand that, personally, but at the same time, body parts are not rude.

 

I've never had a full body massage, but i think if i did i wouldn't expect them to rub my full body. It just means more than just arms, or legs, or neck etc.

 

How much more is there to the body than that though? Mainly buttocks and torso. The two main types are Back, Neck and Shoulders (self explanatory) and Full Body. Anyway, I've asked about this and apparently female therapists are taught not to massage the abdomen of male clients, which is incredibly sexist.

 

But OK, maybe no one agrees with me; here are a couple of other examples:

 

A few years ago on Britain's Got Talent you could have pole dancers, exotic dancers etc. Now there's none of that.

 

Also, increasing calls to ban Page 3. If we tell women their chests are rude/something to be ashamed of, no wonder so many of them have body issues. Women should be able to go topless just as much as men (I'm not being lecherous - this is a truly sexist situation). Instead, we arrest them for it and tell them their chests are something to be ashamed of.

 

It just struck me that it's amazing you can see absolutely anything online nowadays and we still have so many inhibitions.

[jayseven]

I don't think women hide their breasts because they are ashamed of them. There is such a thing as modesty. Covering up lad's mags and removing page 3 are supposed to be motions towards braking down the objectification of women. Personally I think the magazines women buy are worse than the lads mags as they're always full of "how to lose weight quick" type stories.

 

But Grazza I do think you're kind of clutching at straws. Each of your 'examples' can be explained by their individual, independant circumstances and it's not accurate to see them all as signs of the same prudish apocalypse.

[Ashley]

Re: massaging. I assume it's just that "full" means 'combine the other massage types (back, shoulder etc)'.

[EEVILMURRAY]

Personally I think the magazines women buy are worse than the lads mags as they're always full of "how to lose weight quick" type stories.

I think the argument behind that is so hypocritial it hurts (not what you're saying), but that women are complaining that magazines like Nuts should have covers over the covers like a porn mag because it shows women scantilly clad. but magazines like Mens Health/probably some gay magazines have topless men splashed all over them.

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

I'm not sure if any of the examples you mention actually fall under this, but I do still think we as a society struggle with the taboo of sex.

[Ramar]

Right, but why is this about "need"? What is actually negative about them? Society wears underwear for valid reasons (hygiene) - I'm not a naturist and don't understand that, personally, but at the same time, body parts are not rude.

 

It's not rude or disgusting. It's just showing some modesty and curtesy to everyone else. I wouldn't walk around town in just a pair of briefs, so I don't do it at the beach/swimming pool.

[Emma]

I'm pretty sure the main reason why people don't get their abdomens massaged is because it's a silly idea.

 

They had a pole dancer on Britain's Got Talent this year.

 

The reason why page 3 has calls to be banned is because it objectifies women. It's not telling women they should be ashamed of their bodies.

 

Yes, it isn't socially acceptable for a woman to walk around topless, but the view hasn't got any worse over the past 100 years. Women's breasts are sexual, just like a man's penis. You don't see men walking around with their willies hanging out, just like you don't see women topless either.

 

We certainly aren't going backwards with our inhibitions, if anything (in general) we are going forwards.

[Pancake]

I'm qualified in full body massage and we do do abdomen on guys, in fact the whole massage is the exactly the same. If anything i've noticed it's the guy who seems to get paranoid/uncomfortable when getting the abdomen done.

The whole body is covered in towels, but the area being worked on is uncovered. I found it a bit annoying, and sometimes restrictive to have so many towels.

 

Went abroad earlier in the year and had a massage and it was the opposite of here! No towel cover, and the male masseuse tried to give me his phone number during the massage. Oh my god. They don't have any inhibitions there.

[Retro_Link]

There you go @Grazza

 

 

@Pancake ;p

 

I found it a bit annoying, and sometimes restrictive to have so many towels.

Pervert! *covers nipples*

[Fierce_LiNk]

 

The reason why page 3 has calls to be banned is because it objectifies women. It's not telling women they should be ashamed of their bodies.

 

Yes, it isn't socially acceptable for a woman to walk around topless, but the view hasn't got any worse over the past 100 years. Women's breasts are sexual, just like a man's penis. You don't see men walking around with their willies hanging out, just like you don't see women topless either.

 

 

This. The bold bit in particular.

 

Can't really complain at the idea of doing away with page 3. I have a hard time explaining it to people who are from another country why it's there in the first place. I'm not sure what the initial reason was for it's inclusion. If we replaced the woman with a man showing his knob off, would we still want it there? Doubt it. Most men aren't opposed to it because, "hey, it's breasts."

 

Is there any point in massaging the abs anyway? Isn't the whole point of a massage to release tension in certain zones, such as the shoulders, head, back, etc? Getting your stomach massaged seems odd to me, and I'm pretty sure it would just make me want to run off to the loo half-way through.

[Grazza]

I'm pretty sure the main reason why people don't get their abdomens massaged is because it's a silly idea.

 

Silly? ...OK, you've convinced me.

 

They had a pole dancer on Britain's Got Talent this year.

 

This one?

 

 

Yes, I think the massive rectangles that flash up on screen really help you appreciate her body.

 

Can't really complain at the idea of doing away with page 3. I have a hard time explaining it to people who are from another country why it's there in the first place. I'm not sure what the initial reason was for it's inclusion. If we replaced the woman with a man showing his knob off, would we still want it there? Doubt it. Most men aren't opposed to it because, "hey, it's breasts."

 

Not true with me. Chest does not equal genitals. I think it would be fine if it was an artistic nude photograph every day with both genders in it.

 

Is there any point in massaging the abs anyway? Isn't the whole point of a massage to release tension in certain zones, such as the shoulders, head, back, etc? Getting your stomach massaged seems odd to me, and I'm pretty sure it would just make me want to run off to the loo half-way through.

 

I thought you'd understand this one, Fierce Link, as a fitness fan. In weight training, you keep your core firm in every single exercise.

[Fierce_LiNk]

Silly? ...OK, you've convinced me.

 

 

 

This one?

 

 

Yes, I think the massive rectangles that flash up on screen really help you appreciate her body.

 

 

 

Not true with me. Chest does not equal genitals. I think it would be fine if it was an artistic nude photograph every day with both genders in it.

 

 

 

I thought you'd understand this one, Fierce Link, as a fitness fan. In weight training, you keep your core firm in every single exercise.

 

I know about keeping the core firm, but I never knew getting your abs massaged was even something that was done. Having a quick browse on the net, it seems that in practice it generally isn't a widely done thing. You can ask for it to be requested, but a lot more emphasis is placed on the back, shoulders, etc. (particularly the back) Personally, if I were to have a massage after a heavy lifting session, I'd be asking for my back, shoulders and probably hamstrings to receive attention. The very last thing on my list (aside from pen0r) would be the abs.

 

Edit: You might have some luck if you ask for the abs to be done.

Edited November 17, 2013 by Fierce_LiNk

[Ashley]

Surely if you wanted your abs done you'd be getting a sports massage, whereas it sounds like Grazza went for a relaxation massage instead.

[Iun]

and I'm pretty sure it would just make me want to run off to the loo half-way through.

 

Very much this. Massages here cost between 5GBP and 25 GBP. The good ones tend to be the cheaper ones at "blind massage" centres where the masseuses and masseurs are actually blind. There's nothing sexual about it and you can have a lovely poo afterwards.

 

But the others, well... you have to pick your place carefully. It will become obvious within about five minutes whether or not they are going to give you a ... umm "full body" massage. They'll touch you in places...

 

So disgustingly cheap and just the ticket after a long day at work.

[Charlie]

Another example is swimwear. When I was young, we all wore normal swimming trunks (now known by the brand name "Speedo"). This style is by far the most comfortable and best for swimming, and yet now they are called "budgie smugglers" and seen as a bad thing.

 

Unless you're a professional swimmer, there's no need for you to be wearing Speedos.

 

Any time I swim properly I wear my jammers. They're like what people call 'Speedos' but knee length. And yes, you can see the outline of my cock if you look closely. And no, I don't care if anyone sees it. They're the perfect attire for swimming.

 

Yes, it isn't socially acceptable for a woman to walk around topless, but the view hasn't got any worse over the past 100 years. Women's breasts are sexual, just like a man's penis. You don't see men walking around with their willies hanging out, just like you don't see women topless either.

 

We certainly aren't going backwards with our inhibitions, if anything (in general) we are going forwards.

 

Go to a European beach and you'll find the split between topless women and women in bikinis is probably in the favour of topless. It's different cultures. A boob or penis is only seen as sexual in our society because that's what its made out to be. There are hundreds of nudist meetups in our coutnry where people of all ages and swim naked or whatever and that isn't seen as sexual.

[Emma]

@Charlie I agree with it being a cultural thing, and that's why we don't have women walking down the street in the UK with their boobs out, because it's seen as a sexual display. As I said before, if boobs weren't seen that way then of course you'd see women topless, just like men.

 

I've never been to a beach in Europe and noticed more women topless than not, but maybe I'm not looking for it.

 

I think in relation to this topic, people can do whatever they want in public, as long as it's not physically sexual.

 

@Grazza They covered her up because it's a family show, which lots of children watch (and it's funny). Again, it's not because there is anything shameful about showing her body, it's because it's a sexual performance. They can't get away with showing anything obvious like that.

[Charlie]

I've never been to a beach in Europe and noticed more women topless than not, but maybe I'm not looking for it.

 

That's where you're going wrong!

[Rummy]

You don't see men walking around with their willies hanging out

 

Maybe you haven't been to Aylesbury yet.

 

Go to a European beach and you'll find the split between topless women and women in bikinis is probably in the favour of topless. It's different cultures. A boob or penis is only seen as sexual in our society because that's what its made out to be. There are hundreds of nudist meetups in our coutnry where people of all ages and swim naked or whatever and that isn't seen as sexual.

 

I find this interesting in the sense of it being cultural and all that. The sad/bad thing of that is will it ever be changeable? On the page 3 sorta line I think the more taboo it's made the more sexualised it becomes but I'm not really basing that on much. As far as Page 3 goes I really don't care much either way - bigger issues and all that.

 

Any time I swim properly I wear my jammers. They're like what people call 'Speedos' but knee length. And yes, you can see the outline of my cock if you look closely. And no, I don't care if anyone sees it. They're the perfect attire for swimming.

 

Ohhh yeaahhh they are!

[EEVILMURRAY]

On the page 3 sorta line I think the more taboo it's made the more sexualised it becomes but I'm not really basing that on much. As far as Page 3 goes I really don't care much either way - bigger issues and all that.

Did you not notice the models comments?! They were so SMART! They could relate any topical event to a famous quote from history. It was truly inspiring.