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Posted

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Just playing Zelda Oracle of Seasons again and I find myself once again running into people's houses, smashing pots and then talking to them as if nothing happened, laughing at the utter absurdity of the game's logic :laughing:

 

Deep down I'm pretty sure that everybody has laughed at least once at how stupid video game logic can be. So how's about a thread where we all point out how dumb games can be!

 

Whether it's the fact that Mario can breath in space in Mario Galaxy, but not underwater!? :confused: Or the fact that he can swim underwater in Super Mario Bros: The Lost Levels, but if he falls into it from above the water he dies!

 

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(BUH!?)

 

Share your favourite bouts of dumb nonsense game logic! :D

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Posted

"Cloud, Sephiroth is hiding in the Northern Crater, poised to crash this meteor unto Earth. This is it, the final battle! We must give it our-Cloud?"

 

Chocobo.jpg

Posted

Assassin's Creed. Altair can take sword stabs like a pro, climb buildings in seconds, and leap from high towers into a little bit of hay without a scratch. Yet if he falls in water he dies instantly.

Posted

I like how on GTA you can kill people, steal cars and all sorts of stuff, and as long as you have the ability to hide from police for 5 mins, you're off the hook.

Posted
I like how on GTA you can kill people, steal cars and all sorts of stuff, and as long as you have the ability to hide from police for 5 mins, you're off the hook.

 

Or...

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Posted
There's nothing like smashing a phone box to bits with one punch to find a delicious roast chicken inside :heh:

 

Oh god! That reminds me of Disaster Day of Crisis. That game is the KING of stupid nonsense logic! :o

 

Pretty much everything in the entire game makes no sense whatsoever. From the conveniently timed disasters, to the dumbest group of terrorists who ever existed who kidnapped "her" for no real reason whatsoever, to Ray's disappointing voice whenever you press the button to look for injured survivors and dont find anyone, to the ability to OUTRUN A TSUNAMI ON FOOT!

 

disaster-day-of-crisis-screens-20080912072406375.jpg

 

Also Ray apparently can obliterate steel boxes with his bare fists (upon which finding burgers and soda cans that are larger than his head).

 

Oh but that's nothing compared to the GLORIOUS climax of the game...

 

Ok, so after the gigantic wave of disasters, a metorite comes crashing down to earth (cause why the hell not!?) and what do the government do? Fire off missiles to blow it up? Try to shoot it with lasers to divert its trajectory? NO! THEY SEND ONE LONE MAN INTO SPACE, ARMED WITH NOTHING MORE THAN A MACHINE GUN AND A SHOTGUN TO GO AND BLOW IT UP SINGLE HANDED!

:laughing:

 

 

 

And that's why DDOC is amazing! :D

Posted
Assassin's Creed. Altair can take sword stabs like a pro, climb buildings in seconds, and leap from high towers into a little bit of hay without a scratch. Yet if he falls in water he dies instantly.

 

That's explained in the game. They say the animus hasn't been programmed to handle water yet. He can swim in later games.

Posted
Assassin's Creed. Altair can take sword stabs like a pro, climb buildings in seconds, and leap from high towers into a little bit of hay without a scratch. Yet if he falls in water he dies instantly.

 

This reminds me of one of my favourite silly moments in AC.

 

Really this could happen on any mission in Assassin's Creed, but one mission in particular in AC brotherhood had you follow a religious guy and then unleash an attack on him while he was surrounded by tons of guards all trying to kill you.

 

I launched myself at the target and maliciously slashed him in what was clearly in the throat. The guards were all descending on me just as I attacked him, then since he died a 'final words' cutscene triggered.

 

So the guy who I stabbed in the throat who should have died instantly was having a 1 minute conversation with Ezio, all the whole the hoard of guards were presumably standing still while we exchanged philosophical reflections on how to live life. Love it.

Posted
That's explained in the game. They say the animus hasn't been programmed to handle water yet. He can swim in later games.

 

I must have missed (or more likely forgotten) that bit.

 

It applies in lots of other games though.

 

h88AEDB45

Posted
This reminds me of one of my favourite silly moments in AC.

 

Really this could happen on any mission in Assassin's Creed, but one mission in particular in AC brotherhood had you follow a religious guy and then unleash an attack on him while he was surrounded by tons of guards all trying to kill you.

 

I launched myself at the target and maliciously slashed him in what was clearly in the throat. The guards were all descending on me just as I attacked him, then since he died a 'final words' cutscene triggered.

 

So the guy who I stabbed in the throat who should have died instantly was having a 1 minute conversation with Ezio, all the whole the hoard of guards were presumably standing still while we exchanged philosophical reflections on how to live life. Love it.

 

That's also explained through the animus. The event already happened, so the death cutscene is how it "happened" in history and tells you the story, but the rest of the run up is part of the animus simulation that you went through to get there. So the animations breaks down and pauses for that important story bit, and is recreated when the story bit is over to prevent bugs.

 

I must have missed (or more likely forgotten) that bit.

 

It applies in lots of other games though.

 

h88AEDB45

 

I'm not sure if they actually say it in the main story or you have to find it through the animus information but it is there somewhere.

Posted

I don't see how on Earth that conversation could have ever happened, given he was always surrounded by attackers at every point as part of the mission.

Posted

inventory systems in games

 

lets look in my inventory on fallout, several pieves of armour, about 30 guns rocket launchers, physically large items

 

madness, but then to make it worse, despite carrying an armoury, you get to the weight limit and even a ring or a bottle is too much to carry....at running speed so you have to walk slowly.......

Posted

RPG characters can carry 60 Potions and 60 Hi-Potions. But not more than 99 Potions, that would be madness.

 

Twilight Link can put this in his pocket.

Toon Link can put a hammer bigger than himself in his pocket.

And I still have no idea how can Link's purse hold 500 Green Rupees, but not more than 10 Purple Rupees.

Posted

In Animal Crossing New Leaf, if you are carrying 16 ants, you are unable to carry anything else.

 

If you get rid of the ants, you can then carry 16 whale sharks.

 

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Posted
In Animal Crossing New Leaf, if you are carrying 16 ants, you are unable to carry anything else.

 

If you get rid of the ants, you can then carry 16 whale sharks.

 

Better yet, get rid of one ant and replace it with a filing cabinet. After taking a few trips back and forth, you can now carry more than 100 whale shark with you at a time! :laughing:


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