EEVILMURRAY Posted June 6, 2012 Posted June 6, 2012 Youtube search it. Dur, silly EEVIL. How long was the conference on the whole? Since YouTube's only giving me a load of 2-3 min vids so I don't want to miss anything. I'll have to wait until I finish work again, noooo.
Ashley Posted June 7, 2012 Posted June 7, 2012 Pedestrian decided to walk out of a queue of cars and right into me. Crash bang wallop. We're both okay, although he seemed quite shaken. I'm just bruised and sore with a really stiff neck, so much so that I may get the bus today and tomorrow as I can't really turn my neck completely. Then my headphones stopped working. Then I get to work and someone is ringing my phone and I ignore it but 2 minutes later they're still there. Then another problematic student rang up. Yesterday morning was not the best!
ReZourceman Posted June 8, 2012 Posted June 8, 2012 God. I'm devastated. The person I sit next to at work handed her notice in today. Really happy for her, but absolutely gutted, as I've gotten to know her recently and she is awesome. Good thing there is still other safe people around me, but....its like, first Jake gets moved away, now she leaves, and there are other people leaving soon, I think there are shit loads of people looking for stuff elsewhere. And in fact, Jake and his girlfriend (who also works there) of 2.5 years broke up this week - ugh. Nightmare. So certainly he will probably be leaving asap now. Just feels like everyone is leaving and its getting me a bit down. Mainly this chick though just got me on a downer at the moment. Its fine, I'll get over it after she is gone, just like I always do when a friend leaves work/and the inevitable falling out of touch happens. Depressed. But I am seeing Daft and Molly this weekend so my spirits will be raised tomorrow. I genuinely just feel like curling up in a ball and dying right now though, really random.
Iun Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 So, on Saturday, I finally got the courage to up and walk out! But ever since then I've been feeling I've made a big mistake: I sit in the grubby hotel room thinking about her, unhappy, and I cry. I think about never seeing her again - truly NEVER seeing her again,and that feels terrible. Our beautiful home that we made together... though I hate it because its slowly bleeding all the life out of me... I miss it. I miss her. She annoys me no end, but I miss her. All day Sunday I struggled with the urge to call her - eventually she called me. I had to just make small talk for fear of bursting into tears. Today, I really should be looking for a place to rent, but I can't get the courage. If I do, it will truly be over.
S.C.G Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 So, on Saturday, I finally got the courage to up and walk out! But ever since then I've been feeling I've made a big mistake: I sit in the grubby hotel room thinking about her, unhappy, and I cry. I think about never seeing her again - truly NEVER seeing her again,and that feels terrible. Our beautiful home that we made together... though I hate it because its slowly bleeding all the life out of me... I miss it. I miss her. She annoys me no end, but I miss her. All day Sunday I struggled with the urge to call her - eventually she called me. I had to just make small talk for fear of bursting into tears. Today, I really should be looking for a place to rent, but I can't get the courage. If I do, it will truly be over. Well done on having the courage to do something about your situation Iun but it doesn't sound like you're that happy about it... clearly you needed to do something but I'm guessing now you may be thinking 'better the devil you know' even if being with her was affecting your quality of life. Now it seems that not being with her is also affecting your quality of life but what else could you do? I want to say that you should 'do whatever makes you happy' but clearly you probably won't be happy either way... at least not right away. All I can do is hope that you can make the decision that's right for you... try and put everyone elses feelings aside for a moment so that you can figure out what exactly it is that you want, otherwise how else can you hope to move forward? I don't know if any of this will be of help to you and for what it's worth I'm probably not the best person to take advice from but there it is anyway... you've helped me more than enough times so I hope that I may have been of some use here, either way... hang in there ok?
Iun Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 It could be "better the devil you know" but I hate this feeling of hurting her. I know she's sitting at home, alone and crying. I wish she could have changed.
EEVILMURRAY Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 At least you're having some sense of "remorse", she knew she was hurting you with all that constriction but flatly refused to do anything about it. Even when you confronted her. It's only now she's not getting what she wants she's started to cry. What did she say when she called? She will change and move somewhere more comfortable on the pursestrings/you could have your financial freedom back? Or that she "wishes things to could go back to the way they were"? IE the situation you were unhappy with.
Iun Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Well, the thrust of what she said was ... Nothing. She misses me, and I do miss her. She's unwilling to compromise on the house, but will give me back my financial "independence" such as it is. Two out of three is an improvement. We are going to have dinner tomorrow, at the house. We will see how that goes. I'm not sure if it's wise, but I'm kinda sick of instant noodles and pineapple for dinner. Living in this grubby little motel has made me appreciate the house more.
Charlie Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Well done, Iun. You obviously weren't happy before and did something to try and improve on it. I think that after walking away from someone like that you're always going to be miserable for a while - it's natural, even if you are the one who left her! It will take time to get over it.
martinist Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 (edited) I got dragged into casualty last night with suspected appendicitis. Only to be sent back home with painkillers because it's apparently not bad enough yet to justify opperating >__< Edited June 11, 2012 by martinist I can't spell for crap
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 So, on Saturday, I finally got the courage to up and walk out! But ever since then I've been feeling I've made a big mistake: I sit in the grubby hotel room thinking about her, unhappy, and I cry. I think about never seeing her again - truly NEVER seeing her again,and that feels terrible. Our beautiful home that we made together... though I hate it because its slowly bleeding all the life out of me... I miss it. I miss her. She annoys me no end, but I miss her. All day Sunday I struggled with the urge to call her - eventually she called me. I had to just make small talk for fear of bursting into tears. Today, I really should be looking for a place to rent, but I can't get the courage. If I do, it will truly be over. It does hurt to break things off with someone you love, but with the state of things I'm still convinced it was for the best. You were not happy living the day you did with her, and change wasn't and still isn't visible on the horizon. It wasn't a situation you should have to settle into or grow to like - if you even could. Right now it hurts, but you can move on and pursue a better life. You obviously love her, and that feeling might never go away entirely, but you have to keep in mind that she either didn't respect or didn't understand your situation. Your feelings for each other may be genuine, but it wasn't an emotionally healthy relationship, and that honestly doesn't seem like it's going to change. She might eventually be willing to compromise, but if she's doing it out of necessity rather than understanding and respect, you have to ask yourself if it's really the right way to go. Of course, it's easy for me to sit here and give advice. I've never experienced any of the stuff you're going through, and I can only hope I never will. It's a horrible situation you're in, and I truly hope everything will work out for you eventually, one way or the other.
gaggle64 Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 I got dragged into casualty last night with suspected appendicitis. Only to be sent back home with painkillers because it's apparently not bad enough yet to justify opperating >__< Not bad enough YET?
Slaggis Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Eugh. My boyfriend of two and half years and I broke up last night, so consequently I am a complete emotional mess. I swear when one thing goes wrong in life, suddenly everything turns to shit.
Emma Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 We are going to have dinner tomorrow, at the house. We will see how that goes. I'm not sure if it's wise, but I'm kinda sick of instant noodles and pineapple for dinner. Living in this grubby little motel has made me appreciate the house more. One thing that strikes me throughout all of this is that you've not said one thing that's nice about her. Nothing about her seems to makes you happy. It's all sadness. Of course you're sad now, but you were when you were with her. You only get to live this life once, are you going to waste it?
Diageo Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Sorry to hear about that, both Slaggis and Iun are in situations I've yet to experience so I don't have much advice to give. I agree with Emma though, while you miss your wife Iun, I don't think your life can be happy with her if she maintains acting like she does. What happened with you Slaggis? Why the break up?
Ashley Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Eugh. My boyfriend of two and half years and I broke up last night, so consequently I am a complete emotional mess. I swear when one thing goes wrong in life, suddenly everything turns to shit. Sorry to hear you lovable little slag. Time for drinks!
Magnus Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Now's a perfect time to make a move, Ashley. Iun's not going to stay single forever.
Daft Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 So not like it compares, but today blew. My friend at work, who is just a fucking joy to work with and is generally brilliant, was made redundant today (apparently his role is no longer needed - which is utter bullshit. I have no idea how I would have done this pitch work without him). I'm wanting to work at this place less and less. I'm just violently fucked off for him but also a very tiny bit happy because he was wasted at this place, he can do much better. It's a real opportunity. But yeah, sigh.
Ashley Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Now's a perfect time to make a move, Ashley. Iun's not going to stay single forever. I don't think I'm ready for that jelly. @Daft sorry to hear As you said hopefully he'll move onto better things!
ReZourceman Posted June 11, 2012 Posted June 11, 2012 Eugh. My boyfriend of two and half years and I broke up last night, so consequently I am a complete emotional mess. I swear when one thing goes wrong in life, suddenly everything turns to shit. Ewww, one of my best buds broke up with his chick of 2 and half years this week. Bad week for that time frame, I hope you feel better soon. Iun, you did the right thing. You WILL be okay. I feel bluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrghhhhhhhhh. But its fine.
Iun Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 One thing that strikes me throughout all of this is that you've not said one thing that's nice about her. Nothing about her seems to makes you happy. It's all sadness. Of course you're sad now, but you were when you were with her. You only get to live this life once, are you going to waste it? Precisely, and +1 internets for you. Thinking back, I can't remember much of the time since our marriage when I've been amazingly happy - the entirety of 2010 was spent working 72 hours a week and then spending Sunday on furniture shopping. The first four months of 2011 were pretty much work as well. Now I've broken that cycle, I've been poverty stricken (hyperbole) and still miserable. It was supposed to be a relief. And you, you handsome little slag, get that peachy little bum of yours to China, you can be the latest Rice Queen on the scene. Besides, Gay Pride starts this weekend.
Slaggis Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 (edited) Precisely, and +1 internets for you. Thinking back, I can't remember much of the time since our marriage when I've been amazingly happy - the entirety of 2010 was spent working 72 hours a week and then spending Sunday on furniture shopping. The first four months of 2011 were pretty much work as well. Now I've broken that cycle, I've been poverty stricken (hyperbole) and still miserable. It was supposed to be a relief. And you, you handsome little slag, get that peachy little bum of yours to China, you can be the latest Rice Queen on the scene. Besides, Gay Pride starts this weekend. I genuinely feel bad moaning about my mess of a situation, when yours is obviously worse. I hope you're okay! It was such a mess of a relationship. It came down to the fact that I was still head over heels in love with him, and he just no longer was. He'd kept me hanging on for the past 6 weeks as a 'break', only to then tell me I was no longer wanted. I just feel genuinely broken, however dramatic that sounds. I just can't think of any other way to describe it. Edited June 12, 2012 by Slaggis
Iun Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 I genuinely feel bad moaning about my mess of a situation, when yours is obviously worse. I hope you're okay! It was such a mess of a relationship. It came down to the fact that I was still head over heels in love with him, and he just no longer was. He'd kept me hanging on for the past 6 weeks as a 'break', only to then tell me I was no longer wanted. I just feel genuinely broken, however dramatic that sounds. I just can't think of any other way to describe it. Nope, broken is precisely the word for how you are feeling. You're like an old toy, just tossed casually on the bedroom floor before school. Lying their, one leg stuck straight out behind, an arm bent at elbow, face down in the carpet with your head twisted uncomfortably to one side. You were more than that: you were his favourite, his number one, the most fun and the most treasured. Every time you were together the magic happened: you were pirates, sailing the seven seas in search of the finest booty; you were adventurers, plumbing the deepest recesses of the abyss to save mankind from certain disaster; you were a dynamic pairing of space explorers travelling every day from the outer-ring to the heart of the galaxy. And now... you're broken. But you will get fixed.
Slaggis Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 I love that post so much. -- It's that feeling that you honestly just don't know how you're ever going to trust someone enough to let them that close to you again. If someone can tell you they love you, only to let you go just like that, then how can you ever feel secure in a relationship? I constantly hear of people saying how they feel 'numb' when going through a break up. Fucking hell, I'm beyond jealous of them. I'd give anything to feel like that. I'm sorry, I feel like this is the most dramatic post and yet in the big picture, a 2 and a half year relationship really isn't huge. It's just to me at least, it was everything.
Iun Posted June 12, 2012 Posted June 12, 2012 I'm sorry, I feel like this is the most dramatic post and yet in the big picture, a 2 and a half year relationship really isn't huge. It's just to me at least, it was everything. Don't minimize your own feelings, you stupid Clefairy! Two-and-a-half years is a lifetime in love, and you had that love. You are lucky SO LUCKY to hav had that feeling. And for him to tear it away from you is devastating - that's another good word! When you first met, you were just two pilgrims on the road, looking for a placed to settle. You pitched your tent, then a tent wasn't enough: you needed a house, so you built it. Then you needed food, so you made a shed for the cows and sheep. And slowly, from this one house a whole community was built - tennis on Tuesdays, beers on Fridays, Sunday rest and those dreadful Monday mornings... ...one day along came a storm, and it washed everything away - every single thing the whole town, the thriving community was devastated by the wind and rain. There's nothing left, just a pile of dirt and some memories. And you're sitting there where your house used to be, wondering if ever you can start again... ...well you can, believe me. Because love is addictive. Once you've felt that high, you need it again and again. You have to be ready to meet someone on the road again, or you'll never hit that euphoria. In the meantime, go visit a few other towns and have a little fun. It'll do your confidence the world of good.
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