LiArs, Big-Heads, Cockiness! ARGH!

[Owen]

Now i apologise in advance for another negative topic...but seeing as this is one of my first and probably last threads on this board and i've been here 6 years, i think i have the right to post it, also chatting to LukeLee has made me decide that i gotta write all this down and just rant basically before i explode.

 

So yeah, i'm not very happy as you can probably tell..i'm suffering from a bad case of depression which has got worse after 3 years of having it..and this is all the type of people i'm coming across...

 

Lets start of with Liers! Now i think i'm a nice chap..don't have a bad word to say about anyone..so why do people think they have the right to lie to me? It's fucking hurtful..i've had people say something to me..then do the total opposite even when they know i can find out...Whats the point? Do they think there clever or something? Seriously there thick as shit.

 

Big-Heads, Cockiness..This gets me..why do some people think there better then everyone else? I can understand needing a bit of confidence..but the type of people who thinks life evolves around them and there great are just prats..I can seriously be doing without it thanks..

 

Another thing..I take the time to listen to people when there down and i'm always there for the people who i care about..but not many seem to be there for me when i need them (excluding a few i must add, a very small few)! I understand my mates are busy..but it's like..the odd text wouldn't hurt just to see if i'm coping alright seeing as i'm the unwell one...i know it sounds selfish but there lifes are going pretty swimmingly (even though they often think there not..believe me..having a partner, alot of friends, a job and going out etc..is pretty good going, i barely have the mates really..)

 

It just seems nice guys finish last and the ones who are arseholes get the great stuff...it makes no sense..I've had some positive stuff happen this year..but it's been totally out-weighed but loads of negative shit and i haven't got the ability to take anymore..

 

Anyway, am i the only one thinking like this? Does anyone else understand where i'm coming from?

 

Oh and i know it's a shit-thread, i actually was leaning towards not posting it..but i feel better for getting it out of my head..so theres one positive at the end of the day.

[Dyson]

I know what you mean - nice guys finish last indeed. Sorry to hear you're having a shit time, hope things get better for you soon matey.

[Owen]

I know what you mean - nice guys finish last indeed. Sorry to hear you're having a shit time, hope things get better for you soon matey.

 

Thanks mate..i actually feel alot better for writing it down, getting it out of my mind..may do that (on paper not on the board, my threads would fill up the general chat, lol) more often..

[EEVILMURRAY]

It's the human condition. There's not alot to say but get used to it.

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

Fortunately, the good guy doesn't always finish last. You're just around some of the wrong people, I guess.

[Owen]

It's the human condition. There's not alot to say but get used to it.

 

Yep i agree..difficult though.

 

Fortunately, the good guy doesn't always finish last. You're just around some of the wrong people, I guess.

 

Very true..but yeah..seem to be around alot of the wrong people lately..lol...i'm trying to get on with things etc..just hope they work out.

[Jimbob]

You know, similar things occur in my life as well. I really hate people who think they are better than anyone else, usually at pool anyway. All i say to them is they are all words and no action unless they prove it and prove to everyone that they are better, 9/10 they aren't as good as anyone else i know of because they don't prove it.

 

And i hate it when i text people asking them something and no-one texts back, and if they do its asking something different to what i asked.

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

i'm trying to get on with things etc..just hope they work out.

 

That positive attitude can make all the difference.

[Owen]

You know, similar things occur in my life as well. I really hate people who think they are better than anyone else, usually at pool anyway. All i say to them is they are all words and no action unless they prove it and prove to everyone that they are better, 9/10 they aren't as good as anyone else i know of because they don't prove it.

 

And i hate it when i text people asking them something and no-one texts back, and if they do its asking something different to what i asked.

 

I often get the texting thing as well and I officially hate msn now! I started slowing down on texting people cause I prefer talking to em face 2 face now! Being so paranoid and not getting a reply makes me feel awful! LOL!

[Hero-of-Time]

I kinda know what you're going through, Owen. I have mentioned it before in these type of topics that I had depression about 8 years ago and it aint a nice thing to have.

 

In regards to your mates maybe you guys arent as close as you think you are? I know when I have problems and stuff on my mind my mates will be their for me and look out for me. Just the other month I was ill and I got a few messages via live and txt messages to see if I was alright. Its times like these that you find out who your true friends are.

 

The whole nice guys come last thing is pretty true. I think we get this image from TV shows and movies that nice guys get screwed over but everything turns out fine, usually this isnt the case. Its a dog eat dog world and usually the guy with zero morals wins.

 

Im hoping you dont leave the boards as I enjoy your banter and have missed your imput over the last few weeks. I hoping you feel better, take it easy Owen

[jayseven]

Hey dude. Don't put yourself down unnecessarily

 

Liars suck. People who let you down suck. I have friends who you know will never be on time, or will get all hissy if someone says the wrong thing... Everyone is annoying for one reason or another.

 

I was a bit down last year. To rectify the feeling of isolation I started stitching myself onto other people; I got in touch with an old mate and effectively made 5 new friends. I started putting the london meet together with some other guys here. I joined the juggling society at uni and progressively, assuredly, I started feeling waaaaay better. Keeping myself busy with different people meant I felt like I had more to say to the other people. I've started appreciating the power of having a hobby...

 

But that's self-help. That doesn't change the cocks in the world. Everyone and everything is so darned complex, and there are all these issues affecting it all, all of the time.

 

Sometimes life can seem like it's been shit since forever, and that you're never happy. But there are some days where you're less unhappy than others. Focus on what makes the difference. It could be that you had three wheetabix rather than two... It could be that you woke up and your hair wasn't a mess. Could be anything.

 

I don't want to preach or sound like I know the solution, because I don't; I don't completely know what the problem is :P But I do know that people can be twats, but the best way to deal with that is to not let them get to you - to find the strength within yourself to believe that it doesn't last forever; that life still has lots to offer! I think I'm rambling now...

[Ganepark32]

I know exactly what you're going through. I've been through it before and I'm going through it myself. It really does look like good guys finish last. But it's not all like that. There's only so long that you can come last before things perk up. Chin up mate. As I said, things will perk up.

 

It's strange this kind of topic appeared here as it's exactly how I am feeling right now and have been for awhile. Just finding someone to talk to helps.

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

Hey dude. Don't put yourself down unnecessarily

 

Liars suck. People who let you down suck. I have friends who you know will never be on time, or will get all hissy if someone says the wrong thing... Everyone is annoying for one reason or another.

 

I was a bit down last year. To rectify the feeling of isolation I started stitching myself onto other people; I got in touch with an old mate and effectively made 5 new friends. I started putting the london meet together with some other guys here. I joined the juggling society at uni and progressively, assuredly, I started feeling waaaaay better. Keeping myself busy with different people meant I felt like I had more to say to the other people. I've started appreciating the power of having a hobby...

 

But that's self-help. That doesn't change the cocks in the world. Everyone and everything is so darned complex, and there are all these issues affecting it all, all of the time.

 

Sometimes life can seem like it's been shit since forever, and that you're never happy. But there are some days where you're less unhappy than others. Focus on what makes the difference. It could be that you had three wheetabix rather than two... It could be that you woke up and your hair wasn't a mess. Could be anything.

 

I don't want to preach or sound like I know the solution, because I don't; I don't completely know what the problem is :P But I do know that people can be twats, but the best way to deal with that is to not let them get to you - to find the strength within yourself to believe that it doesn't last forever; that life still has lots to offer! I think I'm rambling now...

 

If you are, then do ramble on, for those are deep words of wisdom.

[Owen]

Thanks everyone means alot to know I'm not the only one thinking like this! Hate the idea of others feeling like I do though! Wouldnt wish this feeling on anyone!

[ShadowV7]

I know where your coming from, and pretty much have the same views as you with everything aswell. The decent people get the short straw where as the ones who don't deserve what they have get everything. Though I like to think in the future you'll have those good things happen to you and the asses get hit with problems that you had to deal with in the past.

 

Perhaps try to get some friends who you can properly rely on and talk to. But don't you dare go leaving, your one of the better forumers in my eyes and through the boards, you seem like a damn right good person.

 

I hope you can get stuff sorted out soon Owen.

[Hellfire]

Can't say much asides from keeping your head up. Try to take a step back and chill whenever you can, eventually things will get better. And I'm saying this while I'm possibly in the worst time of my life so far, so I'm not just blowing hot air. So, good luck with everything.

[Jonnas]

Well, I don't know if I can be useful as so many people already gave great advice already.

 

Just keep your head up, release your frustration whenever possible, and stick with your true friends. They can do a lot, really.

 

Good luck. Cheer up

[Fierce_LiNk]

Sorry to hear about your woes, dude.

 

But, nice guys don't always finish last. You can be a nice guy and still win miles ahead of the rest. It might mean that those glory days are few and far between, but it will mean that they will taste so much sweeter, as you appreciate them more.

 

If there's one thing Guiness taught me, it is "Good things come to those who wait."

 

So, keep hanging in there, be you, and let others be them. If they lie or act arsey, then that's their flaw and not a fault of your own. Victory will come.

[Shino]

Let me just say that as a liar what you just said about us is not true.

 

 

The way I do is, I don't expect much from anyone else and I don't think they expect much from me either. Saves me a lot of trouble.

 

Also, we tend to focus more on the negative part of our life than the positive. Maybe the thing you thought it was so bad was really that much of a problem and that really good time you spent talking, playing or just having general fun didn't get the attention it deserved from you.

 

Just keep eating chocolate.

[Aimless]

Owen, I'm afraid I'm going to pull out the oldest therapy trick in the book and answer your question with another question: why are you asking us?

 

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to help if I can, but if you want to find out why these people lie to you, or why they seem so sure of themselves, then you should be asking them. I now that sounds slightly ridiculous to you, but you'd be amazed how many problems can be solved through good communication.

 

The funny thing about people is that we're all terribly similar, even though we pretend not to be. Confidence is often bravado: if you single a gang member out, separate them from their 'friends', it's amazing how they can suddenly transform into a human being. Lies? Well, there are many reasons behind those — although you can glean a lot of truth from fiction — but at their most tame level some people make things up purely to seem more interesting or cover gaps in their knowledge. The common thread between both of these is, of course, self-doubt.

 

Everyone has their way of coping with the world and who they are; some methods are more effective than others. I don't really know you, Owen, but you strike me as someone that wears their heart on their sleeve. I try to live my life in a similar fashion, but one of the perils of honesty is that you are in some ways putting yourself at a disadvantage as you're giving up an ability that others are still free to use against you. Some would call this noble, others stupid, but the important thing is to say to yourself, "Right, this is who I am, and if I'm happy with myself then I'm going to have to fight to be this way."

 

You are who you are. They are who they are. If you can find a way to get along then that's great, but if you seek to change them then I'm afraid you're most likely headed towards a losing battle; it's hard enough to change oneself. If your friendship is worth fighting for then sit down and try to sort things out, but if things look beyond salvaging... well, there's more than 6 billion other people out there, and plenty of them would be happy to call you friend.

[nightwolf]

I can I just poke my head in and say that nice guys don't always finish last.

 

I will always go for the nice guy, always, christ knows I've had my share of twats and I can say a nice guy wins everytime. Nothing beats a guy who is not only sexually attractive but personality too. Who is caring and actually pays attention!

 

Unfortunetly not everybody feels the same way, which is when the shit hits the fan.

 

I'm sorry you've had to put up with such shitty people! I've had similar the past few years and only just got out of it coming to university.

 

As long as you remember that people are selfish bastards, it makes life abit easier, not all are intentional

 

and have a massive hug, just because you deserve one, there isn't enough nice guys in the world! *hugs*

[somme]

Fortunately, the good guy doesn't always finish last. You're just around some of the wrong people, I guess.

 

'tis true. I'm nice, honest, and funny. My friends agree. I like them.

[Ten10]

Yeah, the nice guys always lose. But then the question is why do we keep playing by the rules if we're just going to lose time and time again?

 

Now as far as Liars go, when someone claims to be madly in love with you etc. its quite hard to believe, when they decide to avoid you for a week, sleep with someone they claim to be a friend they found 'easy to talk to' and it happened by 'accident' and expect you to still want to try and make things work. Let's add selfishness to the list. So being the nice guy who plays by the rules, values good values in any relationship, where is my justice if such a thing still exists.

 

Sorry for hijacking........

[Owen]

Thanks everyone, thanks alot!

 

I am sensitive and i do wear my heart on my sleeve..though i must say a positive..i have grown in confidence lately and done alot of positive stuff these last few months..i just feel terrible again now..and unlike a few months back i'm running out of energy to do anything anymore..

 

I agree, i should see a doctor etc..but i'm scared..i don't wanna go on medication either..and for some stupid reason i'm even holding back from something which in the end would probably help me..

 

The thing is..when people lie to me etc..i immediately think it must be me..must be the way i am..must be the way i act etc..They mustn't like me...it's terrible..it's like i have two brains..one telling me one thing..the other saying something different..and there conflicting..I rarely have days where i think 'there not worth it, forget about em' purely because i haven't got many mates anyway..which in turn worries me cause it's not the lack of trying...

 

I think my negativety and depression often scares people away..i try my best to be positive etc..but it's like they cannot be bothered to have the worry when i go down..

 

I don't know what to do..do i start a fresh? My local area is so small that everyone knows everyone..so if you hate or feel uncomfortable around one person you can be sure that your one mate knows em etc..makes it difficult.

 

I've always wanted to move away but it's a massive step..not sure i have the ability to do it..therefore i'm stuck..I'm just hoping when i get a full time job that there are people my age there which i can befriend.

 

I think it's cause it's not just one thing on my mind, theres lots..and i'm still coming to terms with the fact i might be gay (big thing for me this)..very difficult to explain to those who aren't, that it's sometimes something you can't actually decide..it's like..my brain is telling me that i like men..even though i would really prefer to like women most of the time..why? because it would just be easier wouldn't it? I would feel more comfortable approaching blokes to befriend when the main thing you have in common with em immediately is liking girls cause thats what most blokes talk about constantly..I don't 'really' hate myself for being gay by the way..i'm obviously slowly coming to terms with it cause i've met someone i like recently..but it's like i'm pinning all my hopes on that one person and i want some male mates which i go out with etc..and are here for me! I'm worried they won't accept me..cause not many blokes i know here have in my opinion..even when they don't know i'm gay!

 

I love my girl-mates, i really do, but it's like i'm slotted in to their busy schedules..perhaps i expect too much? I don't know..

 

I'm rambling again and going onto different subjects.....lol..apologies..

[Ten10]

Hmm. Sometimes I feel I have two brains too, but perhaps it's really your heart conflicting with your head. Deciding which one to go with is always the difficult thing, because your heart will most likely let you get hurt time and time again. While your head will stop you from living life. I suppose its up to you to some how get them to work together. Don't know how to go about that because I haven't learnt how myself. I've considered moving away from my home town , and although it is a big step consider what you're leaving behind and if its something worth staying for.