nightwolf Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Why is ''can I buy you a drink'' a cliche? Saying hello and asking to buy someone a drink is a nice way to get things going in conversation, but from there, be yourself, if she says yes then ask about going to chat (usually in the outside area as you can hear one another.) or ask if she wants to join your group with her gang etc. Pssh and boys, stop over-thinking this sort of crap, it'll get you nowhere!
Serebii Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Why is ''can I buy you a drink'' a cliche? Saying hello and asking to buy someone a drink is a nice way to get things going in conversation, but from there, be yourself, if she says yes then ask about going to chat (usually in the outside area as you can hear one another.) or ask if she wants to join your group with her gang etc. Pssh and boys, stop over-thinking this sort of crap, it'll get you nowhere! It's just such a poor and obvious move. I just feel it's so overused and feels so wrong :/ You know, if you do go and talk to any random girl, make it out just by your manner that you're interested, you'll feel like a king even if she rejects you, entirely because you had the balls to actually go to her and do it. Of course, if you can muster the kind of confidence it takes to do that, its just as likely girls will be coming up to you. Then again, its one of those circular things; you only get the confidence to do it once it's already worked in your favour once before. Shit maybe you just have to stick it out and try to get lucky. Try to put yourself in situations where you're around single women more often. Fuck it, if a bunch of you guys have this problem and are based in the same area, why don't you meet up and go on the prowl? That's probably my problem. I am completely devoid of confidence. I have everything else, but my confidence is just well and truly shot
nightwolf Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 It's just such a poor and obvious move. I just feel it's so overused and feels so wrong :/ It's only wrong if you act weird about it, I suppose idiots are to blame (not to mention tv.) but it's actually quite a nice thing to do.
Ashley Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Yes. I am 40% more likely to sleep with someone if they get me a drink. Bit awkward at events whereby the drinks are free.... As long as you seem genuine about it and its a polite gesture to promote conversation, not just "want to get drunk so I can fuck you", it can't be too bad.
Serebii Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Will give it a go next time those mates are in town, or next time I'm in Portsmouth. Unfortunately, my local group of friends are big pains in the ass in regards to going out, and if we do, most of them are gone by 10pm
Will Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Then you just stay out on your own! Have you ever tried chatting to a girl about Pokemon? Don't go crazy with it but as a little aside I'm sure it would perk some interest. SEGA works for me almost everytime.
Serebii Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I don't like being out on my own, it gets boring quickly and is just sad I have tried a couple of times, but I don't really like to as it destroys the first impression. I sly it in when they've gotten to know me a bit so they know I'm a great guy despite that
Ellmeister Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Just to comment on the 'can I buy you a drink' cliche, is it really overused? I don't know of people ever actually using it. I reckon it probably is the best way to get a conversation flowing.
nightwolf Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Seb - if someone asks you what you do, I'd definitely say about it! You'd be surprised how many girls would/will think that's pretty sweet, you have your own business, you do well out of it and it's pokemon, who doesn't like pokemon? The ''can I buy you a drink?'' works for me, it's a nice offer, obviously it has to be sincere and not creepy (there was one guy who tried this and then tried to get with two of my friends when I turned him down, we never saw him at uni after that.), why not? A free drink for me and some nice conversation - yes please!
Diageo Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Everyone loves free drinks. Although you'd have to be careful, some people lead you on just to get more free drinks. *shifty eyes*
Serebii Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Are you sure they wont think it sad/pathetic/lame and me not worth their time?
Magnus Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Stop worrying so much or embrace your singleness already. I have tried a couple of times, but I don't really like to as it destroys the first impression. I sly it in when they've gotten to know me a bit so they know I'm a great guy despite that At least you're not playing Magic the Gathering.
nightwolf Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Are you sure they wont think it sad/pathetic/lame and me not worth their time? You're not going to find out until you try. It's an over-used phrase, but honestly, what is the worst that's going to happen? You try to be nice and get a drink for a girl who catches your eye and she says no, so what, you'll most likely never see her again and at least you were nice enough to try. On the other hand, if you do try and she says yes, it might lead to nice conversation and the possibility of meeting someone you like. Oh the hard decisions
Serebii Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 (edited) Stop worrying so much or embrace your singleness already. At least you're not playing Magic the Gathering. That doesn't ease my concerns at all, if anything it just made them worse :P They'd find that I run the site, they'd find people calling me a thief based on actions when I started the site in 1999, they'd find people calling me an arrogant prick, then they'd find this You're not going to find out until you try. It's an over-used phrase, but honestly, what is the worst that's going to happen? You try to be nice and get a drink for a girl who catches your eye and she says no, so what, you'll most likely never see her again and at least you were nice enough to try. On the other hand, if you do try and she says yes, it might lead to nice conversation and the possibility of meeting someone you like. Oh the hard decisions True...I will give it a go next time, providing I'm of an inebriation level where I'm not overanalysing. Problem is, next time may not be for months :/ Edited August 31, 2011 by Serebii Automerged Doublepost
Diageo Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I've used your site for years and never heard a bad thing about you. I have however never gone on the forums, and I'm pretty sure a girl that just met you wouldn't either.
Charlie Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I've become much better at engaging in social behaviour (yay for breaking out nerdy stereotypes!) and just talking to people I don't know, which is quite the personal achievement for me, but I still don't seem to be sending the right signals when it comes to attracting the attention of the female population. Does anyone know of a place where I can get my pheromones enhanced or something? Smile lots and compliment them on small things which usually go unnoticed. Their shoes is a fantastic one because no guy will ever compliment a girl on her shoes purely because we don't ever notice them! So, say you're in a club or meeting a random female... WHAT THE HELL DO YOU SAY?? Two options: My favourite, 1) Say NOTHING. Await an 'eye fuck'. i.e. A girl looking interested in your direction and then do an Inbetweeners style dance move over to her. Smile (because that is when you look your best) (but not in a creepy way) and approach her and start dancing. If she likes you she will dance back and then you can move in for the kiss! Once you've been pulling for a while you can pull back and play some moves. Ask her what her name is, chat for a minute, then when she moves back into kiss again move away so she can't. She'll want you even more. 2) Say "Hey, how's it going?" or similar. I approached a girl on the dancefloor a couple of weeks ago by asking her if she was stalking me. Worked a charm because I said it in the right manner. Joking tone but semi-serious look on my face. I said "I've seen you dancing over there next to me, then over there, and now over here!". She started laughing and told her friend, then we got down to it. I find it best just to say something natural that comes into your head. Play it cool. Girls like cocky funny because it makes you look like you irradiate confidence! I've said it before, but I'll repeat it anyways,.. from my experience if your 'trying' you tend to not 'get' Yeah I quite often find the nights when I'm just having a good time with my mates the girls love it because they see you don't care at all! Why is ''can I buy you a drink'' a cliche? Saying hello and asking to buy someone a drink is a nice way to get things going in conversation, but from there, be yourself, if she says yes then ask about going to chat (usually in the outside area as you can hear one another.) or ask if she wants to join your group with her gang etc. Or she could take the drink and walk away - that happens a lot! Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever offer to buy a girl a drink as an opener! It puts you on the back foot almost instantly! What you need to do is find a better way to open with her. Then if you want later on you can use the buying a drink as a tactic to get her away from her pals which can only work in your benefit in the long run! It's well known that girls want sex just as much as guys do, however, they don't want us to know that! It is also apparent that girls know that their girl mates want sex, but they don't want their girl friends to know that they want sex! Therefore if you isolate them from their friends the stigma of having to leave with a guy in front of them is far less! It's all very logical! (I'm guessing, as usual I'll get ripped to pieces here by people saying that this stuff never works, is totally untrue etc and you'll never get a girlfriend this way. As usual, this is only to hook up with girls for one night and not a long term thing! These methods are tried and tested by myself and others and as you all know, I'm shagging girls left, right and centre! :P )
The Bard Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 (edited) Alyssa Bereznak is a rancid, odious creature who is not only someone who you would not look at twice, but is also thick as fudge. I think maybe you should concede that you're stereotyping women somewhat if you expect them all to have that kind of reaction to your line of work. On second thoughts, maybe what you percieve them to think only really reflects your own opinion. In which case you got other problems to figure out first. Also, I don't think any sane human would build a personality profile on you based on urban dictionary. You can chill, that shit just doesn't happen. Most important thing; no matter what anyone tells you, getting women interested in you isn't some sort of algorithmic system that can be learnt and played. You gotta have a sense of intuition. No amount of advice is going to come close to the experience of just nutting up and doing it. Edited August 31, 2011 by The Bard
Fierce_LiNk Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Serebii - You are single. Therefore, you have nothing to lose. If you go up to a girl and ask her if she'd like a drink, she'll probably do one of the following: 1. Take you up on that offer. 2. Decline politely. 3. Decline rudely. Option one means you win. Option two means that you didn't win that time, but may do another time. Option three means she was plain rude anyway and a waste of time, so it's good that she declined! Just be friendly. Confidence is a big thing, so why not just use this time to try a few different tactics and technique...wait a minute... You're Training in the field, ahahahaha. What we're essentially doing is levelling you up here, to get your experience high enough so you can go out there and catch a female. Aaahah. Try a few different things. If they work, then winnaaar. If not, nobody will care, probably not even you. If you don't try, you'll never get laid ever again. So, I recommend you do try.
Magnus Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 then they'd find this That's a bit of a turn-off, admittedly. Don't show them that. Serebii - You are single. Therefore, you have nothing to lose. If you go up to a girl and ask her if she'd like a drink, she'll probably do one of the following: 1. Take you up on that offer. 2. Decline politely. 3. Decline rudely. 4) Her boyfriend stabs his eye out and forces him to eat it. I thought that was the concern here.
Fierce_LiNk Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 That's a bit of a turn-off, admittedly. Don't show them that. 4) Her boyfriend stabs his eye out and forces him to eat it. I thought that was the concern here. Cmaaan. That's very unlikely to happen. As long as you look first and make certain that she isn't hanging around the same bloke (who probably is her boyfriend) the whole time she's there, then it's just an honest mistake. How can you know if somebody is single or not from halfway across the club, unless they have their boyfriend right there with them. Or, unless they politely tell you when they decline. In which case, that's fair. So, you just assume they're single until either: a. You see an obvious sign, like a boyfriend there, or a wedding ring. b. They tell you. There's not really an issue there. I was never worried about being stabbed in the eye during my single daysss.
Goron_3 Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I'm interested to see what Zell makes of this thread (just seen him stalking the thread), I've been mates with him for years but I've never seen his pulling moves! Infact, i've never seen ANY of my close friends actually 'pull' a girl, it's weird now I think about it. I'm actually not that confident pulling, I'm much more comfortable just charming/talking to a girl during the day/ at a party or something. I've rarely walked up to a girl in a club and been like 'fancy a drink' or 'how's it going'. Just not my style.
nightwolf Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 Charlie - you fecking idiot, stop watching tv. Girls talk to each other about sex a lot. Far more than you lot seem to realise, they also over-analyse exactly like you all seem to be doing and take things far too seriously. Just chill out, go for a drink and if you see a pretty person go and talk to them. Simple as that, yes really.
Zell Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I'm interested to see what Zell makes of this thread (just seen him stalking the thread), I've been mates with him for years but I've never seen his pulling moves! Infact, i've never seen ANY of my close friends actually 'pull' a girl, it's weird now I think about it. I'm actually not that confident pulling, I'm much more comfortable just charming/talking to a girl during the day/ at a party or something. I've rarely walked up to a girl in a club and been like 'fancy a drink' or 'how's it going'. Just not my style. You got me. I secretly view this thread to fulfil my dirty voyeuristic needs! (I was doing other stuff while keeping this tab open but hey I'll try and contribute.) I'm quite inexperienced in the pulling department, but I've improved my technique since I've been at uni. My biggest stumbling block is that I don't particularly like clubbing, yet my opportunities were mostly limited to that in the last couple of years. I have to drink copious amounts of alcohol to get any enjoyment out of clubbing, but it also depends on my mood; if I'm in a bad mood I'll end up drinking more and become too drunk to pull. When I'm less drunk, I usually get bored of dancing and move to the outdoors bit where I can strike up a conversation with anyone outside.
Kaytee Posted August 31, 2011 Posted August 31, 2011 I'm guessing this is a good place to come if you want to rant about being single, so just gonna jump in here with some stuff. Basically, I lack self confidence so much, when I like a guy I tend to wait for them to make the first move etc. That never happens so I stay single. If I make the first move I always get the "you're great, but I just see you as a friend" answer. No idea what i'm doing wrong but I guess there must be something. This all sounds so lame now i've written it on here but that's what this thread is here for right? :p
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