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Posted

Where to start with today!

 

Been looking for a new job and on Friday I was told I had been invited to a telephone interview scheduled for this morning at 11am. Great, I think to myself.

 

So this morning I am just writing up a few notes, checking the background of the company, the usual stuff. I knock my phone off the sofa. I pick it up, put it on the table because I am always knocking it off the arm rests. At 10:10 I think I will check my emails to see if I have anything relating to the interview, pick up phone and the screen is knackered. Not smashed, but unusable. Half the screen doesn't respond to me touching it. Crap, I think to myself.

 

Run to Asda to get a phone. I just need any o2 phone, switch the sim and I am golden. Oh, they don't have any of the £12 phone in stock. Nevermind, what about this £20 one? No they don't have that either. End up spending £41 on a damn phone as I have no choice. Get in at 10.30 with new phone in hand.

 

Get my old sim and put it in the phone. Except it is a micro sim and doesn't register in the phone I have bought. I hadn't considered this possibility. It is 10.40. I can't ring the person who I am having the interview with because it is pay & go and obviously has no credit. Email the woman with the number of the replacement phone at 10.45, praying that it gets picked up in time. While doing this I am registering my top up card which I haven't done for about 12 years. Top up a tenner. Start thinking, shall I ring her or not, deliberating what to do. 10.53 she emails back and says no problem and that she will contact me on the second number I have provided.

 

The interview actually takes place which is an achievement in itself. My head isn't with it though, I do the best I can but there are a few uncomfortable silences along the way. I am told I will know by tomorrow if I am invited to a face to face one. Lets see what happens.

 

Of course the kicker is that I could have just bought any phone on any network as my sim doesn't fit anyway.

 

I have a real knack for disasters like this. Anything vaguely important, something happens which means I end up losing focus right before it happens. My last exam at university was in a building I had never been in for the previous 3 years. I got there an hour early to make sure I could find the room. I couldn't. I spent an hour and a half running around panicking until I eventually found the room, and thankfully they let me in and sit it. When I sat down I didn't have a pen so had to ask for one from the invigilator. I mean, what a joke I must have looked. Thing was I had brought about 3, and when I finished and went to pick up my bag at the back of the room, they were all lying there. They had just fallen out of my coat pocket. I passed the exam too. Still, things like this always seem to happen.

 

I was actually quite pleased with myself this morning though as I am quite a stresshead usually but I kept pretty calm and got sorted in the end.

Posted

Boyfriend told me he was abused as a child (full story in relationship thread)

 

Granny is dying

 

Aunt has a tumour wrapped around her aorta and there is nothing they can do to treat her

 

In the past 6 months i've suffered from a really bad infection, and broke out in blisters all over my face. (impetigo) Not only was it as sore as hell, the infection was on the back of my neck and threatening to travel into my spine. Suuuuuuufuckingperb

 

All the stress has been relapsing my daily migraines

 

I need a hug :(

Posted

Sorry to hear that @Raining_again :(

 

 

Bah, I've been parking round the corner from work because like most places in Cambridge, there's no parking. This has worked out for over a month and I've been parking at my old landlord's with a permit. Huzzah.

 

Except now some cranky bitch who I've had a run in before has complained about me parking there, even though I've yet to see more than four cars park in this area (its a shared area and I used to see well over 10 cars parking here in context). So now I can't park there even though I have a permit unless I wish to get clamped.

 

Oh goodie. So now its back to the park and ride, which admittedly isn't too bad of a service, but it means doing a 20-30 minute drive, to get a bus for another 20-30 minutes, to then walk from the stop to work. Its not particularly difficult but my journey time if there's traffic has gone from an hour to nearly two hours.

 

Yay me..I can't really afford anything else unless I find free parking or pay 300-400 more than I am now to move into town. Fuck.

 

edit: Also, can't even ask if there is any free parking at work (there's some spaces) because I've been here a month and I know damn well there's a handful of people who have been there years who yet to have one. bah.

Posted
Except now some cranky bitch who I've had a run in before has complained about me parking there, even though I've yet to see more than four cars park in this area (its a shared area and I used to see well over 10 cars parking here in context). So now I can't park there even though I have a permit unless I wish to get clamped.

 

If you have a permit what's to stop you parking there? Who would clamp you? Private clamping is illegal.

 

The word 'clamp' now sounds weird in my head.

Posted

I'm sick again...fourth time this year.

In the last few years I've rarely been sick and now it's just urgh.

 

Can't breathe through my nose, have the worst headaches, feel like shit :(

 

And uni just started again :indeed:

Posted
I'm sick again...fourth time this year.

In the last few years I've rarely been sick and now it's just urgh.

 

Can't breathe through my nose, have the worst headaches, feel like shit :(

 

And uni just started again :indeed:

 

Damn, that sucks. I got some nasty flu/cold variant (never know what to call this kind, it's worse than a cold but flu sounds a little melodramatic) about 2 weeks ago. After it mostly went I was left with an itchy cough which was so annoying.

 

I would take being ill to the point of lethargy over having an itchy cough. So freaking annoying when you can't sleep over it.

 

My advice is to become a hermit and avoid all mankind. They are nasty plague-bearers.

Posted

Since I started cycling to work my immune system had reached God Mode. Not sure why, but I didn't get sick at all this winter. Whenever I felt an inkling of a sore throat, it was gone by the time I'd finished my commute.

Posted
If you have a permit what's to stop you parking there? Who would clamp you? Private clamping is illegal.

 

The word 'clamp' now sounds weird in my head.

 

Its all a bit strange - so I frankly have no idea.

 

The issue really is that given I've got something that says its a permit, but its something my old landlord has to deal with, given the lady who gave it to him seems to think that the 'permit' is for him to access his garage (he's been living there since 1977..).

 

I'm thoroughly confused by it, but considering I'd rather not cause him stress and/or get clamped, I've stayed away. Thankfully I'm on holiday for a week and a half now, so it can get sorted - hopefully whilst I'm away. Huzzah.

Posted

I was talking to the lady at occupational health (work sickness review type service) and it really occurred to me that I've genuinely not been well at all, for a long time. Just something clicked when talking it over with the woman. She was really understanding. And explaining the whole situation made it really hit home that I'm going to be on this medication for the rest of my life, and its already having an impact. Just one of those really surreal moments where you actually wonder if this is your own life you are seeing, or someone elses?

 

Everything in my life is shifting and changing so rapidly, for someone like me, with a touch of autism and OCD, it is proving difficult. I seem to be leaning towards my work for that solid state of comfort and reassurance. The one true, boring, and safe thing in my life... From not even a year ago, living a life that is NOTHING like this. Fuck, 6 months ago I was stuck in my OCD box existence. Yet in a strange way the disaster is oddly satisfying.

 

I don't feel bad, I don't feel good exactly.... Just strange?

Posted (edited)

So I was in town and on the spur of the moment I decided to upgrade my phone. So I went into the O2 shop, picked one out and paid for it. Then the guy said "OK just had me your phone and I'll transfer all your contacts and photos from your old phone to this new one"

So I handed this guy my phone, he took it to the technition and asked him to do the transfer. So I was sitting there quietly minding my own business then I hear a faint sniggering from both of them. A few minutes later he hands me the new phone with my contacts and photos in.

When I was looking around this phone I went into the photo album and low and behold, 200 pictures of a girl I've been seeing from time to time were in here. I mean this photo album was basicly wall to wall tits and lady parts.

 

Since changing my phone was a spur of the moment kind of thing, I never really looked through it and as such never noticed those pictures were on there :(

 

I can never walk into that O2 shop ever again without that clerk and technition giving me the eye.....>_>

 

On the other hand I have a bottle of white wine and a rum and coke i'm probably gonna drink to dull my shame.

Edited by martinist
Posted

I can never walk into that O2 shop ever again without that clerk and technition giving me the eye.....>_>

 

1) Hundreds of people will walk into that store every day. And they'll see that sort of thing a lot. They won't remember you in a few days time.

 

2) So what? You had pictures of a naked lady that you were seeing. Unless she was underage then I don't see the embarrassment.

Posted
So I was in town and on the spur of the moment I decided to upgrade my phone. So I went into the O2 shop, picked one out and paid for it. Then the guy said "OK just had me your phone and I'll transfer all your contacts and photos from your old phone to this new one"

So I handed this guy my phone, he took it to the technition and asked him to do the transfer. So I was sitting there quietly minding my own business then I hear a faint sniggering from both of them. A few minutes later he hands me the new phone with my contacts and photos in.

When I was looking around this phone I went into the photo album and low and behold, 200 pictures of a girl I've been seeing from time to time were in here. I mean this photo album was basicly wall to wall tits and lady parts.

 

Since changing my phone was a spur of the moment kind of thing, I never really looked through it and as such never noticed those pictures were on there :(

 

I can never walk into that O2 shop ever again without that clerk and technition giving me the eye.....>_>

 

On the other hand I have a bottle of white wine and a rum and coke i'm probably gonna drink to dull my shame.

 

Think about it like this: You're getting some, they're not...;)

 

=====

 

So I got told by my boss I needed to be re-trained on measuring kids' feet, which is a good thing because 1) I hate measuring kids' feet because they either scream down my ears or they move around so I can't get a proper measure and 2) I'm not too confident with babies' feet or even toddlers'.

I asked him why and he was telling me it was because a customer came back with shoes and they were too big.

I said "I may have done the measuring but they may have purchased the shoes and refused to have them fitted"

He says that could be the case but I should have written on the receipt that they fitted the shoes on the child themselves.

Okay.

"I do have another question: How do you even know it was me?"

"They said it was a man"

"It could have been you"

"Nah, they described you. They..."

I stood there, he didn't finish the sentence. "They what?"

"Hm"

"You just said 'they' and then paused? Did they make a complaint?"

"Oh, no, nothing like that...okay, don't hit me, this is what the customer said word-for-word, and I quote...'the big, special, mixed guy served me'. It doesn't matter though..."

Of course, me being me. I laughed it off and said "Yeah, well I am unique, mate! You won't find anyone else as good as me" and he laughed a little. I laughed to avoid awkwardness.

Inside, I was crushed. I then started having these weird thoughts.

I couldn't help but think "Does everyone think this about me? Is this what I get for being myself? Is this what I get for being nice?" and other things like that, it was insane.

I had to leave the actual shop floor and I just went into the toilet and started what I thought was a panic attack. The walls felt closed in and I felt my breathing feel a bit rushed. My head felt a bit dizzy. On top of that, those thoughts were whirling around my head. It's weird, I had such a good week and I was feeling so good and that one little comment just damaged me. It doesn't really help that I know I'm special needs (not that they know) and that I have a touch of OCD and slight nervousness and all that shit.

Of course, I had to go back onto the shop floor and pretend nothing was wrong but I just felt so cut up a bit. I just wanted to go home! I put on this act of being happy and fine but I wasn't, really.

 

God, I hate customers sometimes! How can people just be so nasty and cruel? Maybe it's just something I don't understand! Well, I have a day off tomorrow and I bought myself The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D to play all day so I'll just try and get bitches out of my mind! Ignore me, I'm just being silly! :D

Posted
1) Hundreds of people will walk into that store every day. And they'll see that sort of thing a lot. They won't remember you in a few days time.

 

2) So what? You had pictures of a naked lady that you were seeing. Unless she was underage then I don't see the embarrassment.

 

3) You shared your pics with them. They are grateful.

Posted
I feel really miserable and upset. I started crying earlier on and I don't even know why.

 

I did that a little earlier. It's good to have a good cry sometimes, get all of that negativity out of your system! :)

 

Hope you feel better!

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