Becoming a 'grown up'

[Fierce_LiNk]

Yeah, the financial side of living alone/with a partner is the main draw-back. If it wasn't...I bet most of us would have moved out by now.

 

It's just so bluddy expensive.

[Solo]

I'm 22 at the moment, will be 23 in about 3 weeks time. I still live at home, have no car and currently no g/f. I feel older, but i'm still a kid at heart.

 

The sound of moving out and "Living On My Own" doesn't sound too daunting to me, yes it does sound scary and all that. But i am of the age where this isn't so bad.

 

I just won't move out until A/ my mates have money and wish to or B/ i find a nice female

 

I'm pretty much in the same boat mate.

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

I can be both immature and mature. I'm immature in the sense that I can still laugh over someone farting and love to play videogames yet im very mature in the way that i see things and life itself. [...] So yeah, I'm actually feeling quite grown up yet im still very childish and in a way i'm quite glad as I wouldn't ever want to lose my childish side.

This. This sums up my feelings pretty well.

[Jimbob]

I'm pretty much in the same boat mate.

 

I just don't think living alone is financially ok. I'd be broke within 2 weeks, and always stuck in. With living with parents, its cheap rent and cheap accomadation so going out has no problems at all.

[Mr_Odwin]

I just don't think living alone is financially ok. I'd be broke within 2 weeks, and always stuck in. With living with parents, its cheap rent and cheap accomadation so going out has no problems at all.

 

You don't have to move out to live on your own. Move out to a house share with friends (or with strangers, for that matter). Living at home with parents can be stifling.

[nightwolf]

I'm glad somebody brought this subject up, I've been feeling like this for quite a while now, I think since about 17.

 

I feel very similar to Dyson, I'm barely 19, after having my birthday last friday, I feel like I can do things, I can drive a scooter, a car, I can look after a house, look after animals, even look after children if I have too.

 

..and yet there's lots of things I still don't understand, like mortages, tax..all those crazy things you have to deal with, what forms to fill when you go on holiday, how to get insurance, how to get life insurance!

 

It makes me feel incredibly childish to know that because I've never bothered I don't have even an inkling on how to do the lottery ticket downstairs I was given for my 19th birthday, or how to vote.

 

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not, but I am too mature for my age sometimes, I believe this happens to quite alot of people, I was shocked to hear my sister thinks I grew up too fast, forced too because of the life I've had. I constantly get told I don't 'seem my age' and I wonder if I somehow missed being immature along the way, probably why I act like such a child at uni..

[Eddage]

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not, but I am too mature for my age sometimes, I believe this happens to quite alot of people, I was shocked to hear my sister thinks I grew up too fast, forced too because of the life I've had. I constantly get told I don't 'seem my age' and I wonder if I somehow missed being immature along the way, probably why I act like such a child at uni..

 

Doesn't everyone act like a child (I presume you mean just general immaturity rather than having hissy fits in the isles of Tesco?) at uni though. I never went (wish I had) but, hell, I still act like a child at work, and considering I'm the youngest there by a far few years anyway it's quite noticeable! I think it's just a way of putting off the inevitability of growing up.

[danny]

I'm now 19 years old, and have been for half a year. I'm starting to face the real world, can legally drive, buy my own house, get married, take out a loan, move out, whatever. The point is I'm supposedly a 'grown up' right now, but the problem is...I just don't feel like I've grown up at all.

 

Dont worry about it. I still feel like a child i guess and im 25. I can drive, i have my own house and have had loans in the past. I woudnt say doing any of them has made me feel grown up. I guess i feel a bit older but not as old as i thaught people were when i was a lot younger. Maybe i need to get married or something lol. Maybe you only get as old as you want to.

[Chris the great]

Doesn't everyone act like a child (I presume you mean just general immaturity rather than having hissy fits in the isles of Tesco?)

 

i have actualy thrown a hissy in tesco to piss my mates, a dating couple, off. see they were telling me were to go with the trolly, while i was shopping. i just went for what i needed, cos, you know, i was "driving". he tries to steer me so i started going "nooooooo!" in a childs voice. i also liked to sneek things into people's baskets. my favorite was getting a cucumber and pot of lube into my slightly camp mates basket. he got to the checkout before he realised.

 

and yet i still consider myself a grown up

[S.C.G]

i also liked to sneek things into people's baskets. my favorite was getting a cucumber and pot of lube into my slightly camp mates basket. he got to the checkout before he realised.

 

and yet i still consider myself a grown up

 

Lol classic, did he buy the items in the end or did he do an Austin Powers... "Hey thats not mine!"

[Chris the great]

Lol classic, did he buy the items in the end or did he do an Austin Powers... "Hey thats not mine!"

 

he called me a stupid cunt and made the outher guy with us take them back. i grinned at my wit, whilst slightly regretting that we didnt get one of the good looking checkout girls.

[Aimless]

Personally I think the very idea of someone becoming a 'grown up' is pure fallacy. Yes people will become more mature as they go through life, but this has nothing to do with age and everything to do with experience.

 

There isn't a switch that's supposed to be flicked when you reach 18, the only bearing the passing of time has on one's personality is the way others perceive you. Treat someone like a child and they will act like a child; my dad's 60 now and yet he's far from immune to behaving like a stubborn little boy.

 

Respect your elders, certainly, but don't revere them. Appreciate someone for having lived and offer the world common courtesy, but someone knowing more about mortgages than you doesn't make them a better person. Such things are mostly noise to me as the subject is irrelevant to my current circumstances — I won't be in a position to move out any time soon — but on the other hand my mum needs help simply to turn the TV on and I constantly need to reiterate the basics of computer operation to both my parents as concepts I take for granted, such as where to type a URL or when to double click, never seem to stick. They aren't stupid and I'm not a better person than them due to my expertise in a certain field, it's simply a matter of my being experienced in an area they are not and vice versa.

 

There is no plateau of consciousness where adulthood resides. There is no tipping point. All we can do is gradually grow day by day, learning from our experiences and becoming more rounded people as a result.

[Mundi]

i have actualy thrown a hissy in tesco to piss my mates, a dating couple, off. see they were telling me were to go with the trolly, while i was shopping. i just went for what i needed, cos, you know, i was "driving". he tries to steer me so i started going "nooooooo!" in a childs voice. i also liked to sneek things into people's baskets. my favorite was getting a cucumber and pot of lube into my slightly camp mates basket. he got to the checkout before he realised.

 

and yet i still consider myself a grown up

 

I love doing that.

I always do this to the same guy except with (condoms and lube) when were at LAN parties and off for some sugary supplies (Which is like 3-4 times a year).

I always do this to the same guy because he buys so much and is pretty easy to hide something amongst all the junk there.

 

He laughed the first time but after the fourth of fifth time he just throws me this annoyed glare when he I do this.

[Pookiablo]

I'm glad somebody brought this subject up, I've been feeling like this for quite a while now, I think since about 17.

 

I feel very similar to Dyson, I'm barely 19, after having my birthday last friday, I feel like I can do things, I can drive a scooter, a car, I can look after a house, look after animals, even look after children if I have too.

 

..and yet there's lots of things I still don't understand, like mortages, tax..all those crazy things you have to deal with, what forms to fill when you go on holiday, how to get insurance, how to get life insurance!

 

It makes me feel incredibly childish to know that because I've never bothered I don't have even an inkling on how to do the lottery ticket downstairs I was given for my 19th birthday, or how to vote.

 

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not, but I am too mature for my age sometimes, I believe this happens to quite alot of people, I was shocked to hear my sister thinks I grew up too fast, forced too because of the life I've had. I constantly get told I don't 'seem my age' and I wonder if I somehow missed being immature along the way, probably why I act like such a child at uni..

 

Meh, I wouldn't worry, nobody really understands those things, even someone as big headed as I - you just blag it and hope it all goes alright!

 

Also, if you're childish and you're constantly staving off my childish advances (which, yes, I know you love), what does that make me?

 

In regards to myself, I'm as childish as they come, but heck, I would say I'm responsible. There's nothing wrong with being a big kid, just as long as you know when you need to be sensible and get on with things. How I act at work for example, is for the most part, very different from how I am in my own personal space. At the same time, this doesn't mean that I don't plan to get on with life and secure a nice job and home rather just do so and to try and enjoy myself and be myself on the way there.

 

Hell, I still laugh when someone fart.

[Konfucius]

I'm 22 now, have a car and live in a hall of residence during the week but I go home on most of the weekends and my motto is "you can be a grown up for the rest of your live, don't try to push it" but to be honest I've grown up quite a lot. Sure there are still traits from when I was a child and I make lots of stupid jokes - even more than during puberty - but essentially I'm in a state of transition at the moment and it scares me.

I feel I'm slowly becoming a grown up and I have no idea how this will turn out so I try to cling to my childhood but I also feel that I passed it and should embrace all the competence that comes with really growing up.

 

I think in the end there's not much one can do about it, it's something that's happening gradually. Still I'd say try to stay a child as long as possible and be proud of it but don't force either (childhood or adulthood).

[S.C.G]

ow I am in my own personal space. At the same time, this doesn't mean that I don't plan to get on with life and secure a nice job and home rather just do so and to try and enjoy myself and be myself on the way there.

 

This... pretty much sums up part of how I feel as well, I think jobs are good as they keep us a bit 'grounded' in a way, i.e work-time is a time for responsibility 'n shizzle but when at home it's time to chilllll!

 

Without a job I'd just be kinda chilling nearly all the time and while that's no bad thing I think maybe if I wasn't working I'd feel less responsible if that makes sense... it's an odd feeling really, maybe I've just been working for too long lolz.

[Katie]

I think I'm mature, people always said that to me at work and thought I was older than I was, but at the same time I feel like I can't grow up and be independent until I have my own place, but I can't do that until I have money. Well I could but I would be poor and I don't want to rush out just to be stuck in debt for the rest of my life.

[Ellmeister]

I feel I am maturing. Every time I come home from university, I act differently with my family. I take a more relaxed and understanding approach to things at home rather than just shout loudly and hope I get my way :p

 

I'm still the same with my friends although I now hold more mature conversations (sometimes) and we don't all fook about 24/7 we actually go out clubbing and pub which I feel is quite a grown up thing to do.

 

I know my view on life and maturity towards everything has grown in recent years so I actually do feel like I am growing up. Doesn't mean I want to stop changing my irc name to a pokemon for funzies though :p

[jayseven]

I know debt is bad but it's not as if having a bit of a minus means living in squalor with leprosy for cutlery and flies for toilet roll. I think it's about getting out there and experiencing things.

 

Basically; see the mastercard adverts. Doi!

 

As for the topic; recently I've realised that I appear to be a fully grown man, and utterly capable of scaring small children with a mere glance. From inside looking out, this 'adulthood' is this slowly growing shadow at the edge of your vision; bills and phone calls and contracts and responsible sleeping hours and sobriety all being waved slowly but for eternity, increasingly becoming something hard to ignore. The shadow in itself means I'm more 'grown-up' than I was before, because that unknowing innocence is gone never to return. But A proper 'adult' still seems to me like this cardboard robot that works 'for the man', apologising to the stairs I'm treading on as I climb to the top of the slaughterhouse of commercialism and dive head-first into the chopping machinery, let gravity force my chunks into slithers just to save that little bit of energy or effort for everyone else.

 

Finding the line between enjoying life and affording the time to enjoy life is not only key, but also not something people tend to get right the first time. You can go all-out and enjoy your life TO THE MAX until you run out of steam (read: money), but because you're still, y'know, alive and stuff, you kinda have to keep going. Look back, see where you went wrong, compromise.

 

The more cycles you go through, the more you recognise yourself in others. You'll see these fully-grown, fully-clothed apes-in-suits, too, have their immature sides. 'Society' is this machine that eats up uniqueness, and prints out uniforms and stereotypes. Irons out individuality. Right? Well, yeah, but the thing is that everyone knows this, and nobody really believes it. The trick is to see past it. To see the child that went through what you're going through. To see someone who once wet the bed. If that child can do the 'responsible' gig, then anyone can.

 

What? Where did I go?

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

I know debt is bad but it's not as if having a bit of a minus means living in squalor with leprosy for cutlery and flies for toilet roll. I think it's about getting out there and experiencing things.

 

Basically; see the mastercard adverts. Doi!

 

As for the topic; recently I've realised that I appear to be a fully grown man, and utterly capable of scaring small children with a mere glance. From inside looking out, this 'adulthood' is this slowly growing shadow at the edge of your vision; bills and phone calls and contracts and responsible sleeping hours and sobriety all being waved slowly but for eternity, increasingly becoming something hard to ignore. The shadow in itself means I'm more 'grown-up' than I was before, because that unknowing innocence is gone never to return. But A proper 'adult' still seems to me like this cardboard robot that works 'for the man', apologising to the stairs I'm treading on as I climb to the top of the slaughterhouse of commercialism and dive head-first into the chopping machinery, let gravity force my chunks into slithers just to save that little bit of energy or effort for everyone else.

 

Finding the line between enjoying life and affording the time to enjoy life is not only key, but also not something people tend to get right the first time. You can go all-out and enjoy your life TO THE MAX until you run out of steam (read: money), but because you're still, y'know, alive and stuff, you kinda have to keep going. Look back, see where you went wrong, compromise.

 

The more cycles you go through, the more you recognise yourself in others. You'll see these fully-grown, fully-clothed apes-in-suits, too, have their immature sides. 'Society' is this machine that eats up uniqueness, and prints out uniforms and stereotypes. Irons out individuality. Right? Well, yeah, but the thing is that everyone knows this, and nobody really believes it. The trick is to see past it. To see the child that went through what you're going through. To see someone who once wet the bed. If that child can do the 'responsible' gig, then anyone can.

 

What? Where did I go?

Bravo. Simply bravo.