Love? Relationships? Boy girl stuff? Complaints and appraisals! Gifs be welcome.

[Charlie]

Anyone else see a John Snow/ Kit Harington resemblance in Charlie's face?

 

Never heard that one before but I'll take it.

[bob]

All I see is Neil Patrick Harris.

[Ashley]

I agree. Back to online dating (after recently breaking up with someone for the second time and it is rather annoying!

 

Would have thought being in London would mean more choice and the likelihood of normal people that reply!

 

You'll always have me

[drahkon]

"I love you."

 

My girlfriend said those three words to me this morning for the first time.

 

I'm a happy guy

[Iun]

"I love you."

 

My girlfriend said those three words to me this morning for the first time.

 

I'm a happy guy

 

Did you say them back?!

[drahkon]

Did you say them back?!

 

I did

 

It was a bit of a 'weird' moment. She had to go to work and I was at the door to say goodbye. We kissed and hugged but she didn't want to leave, she started to shake - tremble even. I was worried that something was wrong, asked her what's going on...She said it was nothing.

 

I knew that wasn't entirely true I asked again and she said she was nervous, nervous about me. That really didn't help my worries as you can probably imagine.

 

But then she smiled and said: "I love you."

 

I kissed her and said: "I love you, too."

[nightwolf]

[drahkon]

[nightwolf]

[drahkon]

[Goafer]

 

I felt left out and panicked...

[nightwolf]

 

I felt left out and panicked...

 

@Goafer

 

[Cube]

I'm on a night out with three girls tonight.

Although none are single.

[bob]

Not with that attitude.

[nightwolf]

Not with that attitude.

 

#lifegoals

[Emasher]

Went on a date tonight and the subject of international relations came up:

Her: "Yeah, I think there's going to be a world war four soon."

Me: "Aren't you skipping one there?"

Her: "Haven't there been three world wars?"

[MoogleViper]

Went on a date tonight and the subject of international relations came up:

Her: "Yeah, I think there's going to be a world war four soon."

Me: "Aren't you skipping one there?"

Her: "Haven't there been three world wars?"

 

Perhaps she considers the current wars to be WWIII.

 

 

Or she's just thick.

[Emasher]

Nah. It was pretty clear from the rest of the conversation she was just a complete moron.

[Happenstance]

She sounds like a keeper to me

[Serebii]

Brother got engaged so mum is starting to put pressure on me to find someone.

 

Urgh. Dating sites are bringing nothing, and I'm not meeting enough people outside of that, as very few of my friends have female friends.

[MoogleViper]

DAAYUM, Tinder! You done good, son.

[drahkon]

DAAYUM, Tinder! You done good, son.

 

Care to elaborate?

[bob]

I'm guessing he boinked someone he met though Tinder.

[drahkon]

I'm guessing he boinked someone he met though Tinder.

 

That's why I want him to elaborate.

[MoogleViper]

Care to elaborate?

 

As you wish:

 

So I message this girl from Hong Kong on tinder with my classic opening line:

"Would you rather: A - go for a meal with me; B - go for a drink with me; or C - skip the date and head straight back to yours?"

 

She responded with, "If you had asked me the other day it would have been C, but as it is B sounds nice." I ask he why and she said, "Just following some friendly advice. I like sex and I'm not weird about it, but the game must be played."

 

So at this point I already know I'm onto a winner.

 

While arranging to go for a drink she said, "I'm pretty broke, so you might be required to come straight to mine".

 

In the end I arrange to go for a drink at a local cafe bar near her place. But on the way there she messages me and tells me to go to her place instead. So I nip into Sainsbury's for a bottle of wine and head there. When I arrive she gets a spliff and leads me to her room. She said, "Sorry about the mess, I've been meaning to clean up." Which is normally girls-speak for, "I spent 4 hours cleaning but still feel the need to say this."

 

That wasn't the case. Her room was a real mess. She didn't have a bed, just a mattress on the floor. It was like a crack den (I imagine). We sat on her bed, talking and listening to music. She has a kitten, which kept biting her and her technique to stop this was to loudly miaow at the kitten. I'm sure that's a bona fide technique but it's still strange to be chatting to somebody who's loudly miaowing every sentence.

 

I open the wine. She said she doesn't have any wine glasses. I said I'm not fussy and a mug or something would do. So she gets a dirty mug off her desk and says, "It's got some coffee dried in the bottom but it should be OK." At this point I'm thinking I've made a huge mistake.

 

However after drinking some wine we start kissing. After about a minute she undoes my jeans and starts blowing me. Honest to god this blowjob was sensational; porn star good. At one point she deep throated it all the way.

 

After a while we switch roles, and she's loving it. Then the sex was fantastic, she was such a nympho. Doing it for ages in every position. At one point she grabbed my hand and got me to choke her (I've never understood choking).

 

After about an hour I'm getting pretty knackered (I struggle to finish when wearing a johnny), so I pull out, keep her going with my fingers while I get myself to the point of no return. Then put it back in her to finish off. Not the best of endings but still an incredible night.

 

Then we cuddled naked for a while before going to get a KFC.

 

 

 

Don't say I didn't warn you.