Ashley Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 No I'm not leaving (yet?) and no I'm not possibly talking about Brown. Today was the last of one of my lectures and it meant saying goodbye to a friend for the last time which is always weird. And it will happen again tomorrow. I like these people, but you know when you just know you're not going to see them again due to distance, not being really close etc? Its just a weird feeling and something I didn't really get when I graduated as I knew those I'd like to see again I would. Kind of a weird mix of being underwhelmed/sad/don't know. And I don't really know where I'm going with this but thought I'd start a thread, see what happens. Anecdotes perhaps? Stories of how you kidnap your friends and keep them in your wardrobe to prevent this maybe?
Paj! Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I've thought about this a lot recently, how I've basically stayed in close contact with so few people from school (comparitive to how many "acquaintances" I had, and assuemd I'd still have). Also wondering how my current friends at college will factor in once we all move into second year/different art schools. It was funny when I imagined Ashley being all the characters. P.S I hate her vocal affectations. P.P.S This has no relevance.
Pancake Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I add people like these to Facebook. Then you still have a connection to them, their lives, even if you're not in close personal contact. That softens the blow.
The Lillster Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I don't have many friends so not a problem for me and the ones I do have I don't really like.
Ashley Posted May 6, 2010 Author Posted May 6, 2010 I add people like these to Facebook. Then you still have a connection to them, their lives, even if you're not in close personal contact. That softens the blow. Well there's that but you can't hang out, drink and play pool on facebook (well you probably can, but it would suck). And conversation doesn't flow as easily/naturally on facebook. Oh well, that's life eh.
Jimbob Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I've had a few situations like that before, Pancake is right though. Adding them to sites like Facebook helps to soften the blow of not seeing them again, and also allows you to remain in contact with them. You never know when you may meet again. I've not seen several people i've met in college and comprehensive for years, and i still keep in contact with a few of them still.
nightwolf Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I've never really had to face this problem, although I assume I will when I leave uni next year. For it if it does happen I'll just keep them on facebook and every so often invite a mass of them to go to the pub together.
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 Facebook is the way to go. I'll experience this myself in a month or two when I graduate and some of my best friends move away. I WILL stay in contact with them. Even if it means kidnapping them.
Daft Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 Relationships are so fluid that it just makes me appreciate the now so much more. I couldn't stay friends with someone on facebook/msn without seeing them every now and again. Too much is lost.
Ashley Posted May 6, 2010 Author Posted May 6, 2010 Relationships are so fluid that it just makes me appreciate the now so much more. I couldn't stay friends with someone on facebook/msn without seeing them every now and again. Too much is lost. Yeah this. Its just not the same. Facebook is, to me, a way of keeping in touch with people I will see (even if its not frequently like some people on here) rather than people I never see. Its also made me realise while I've always thought I don't mind being a rolling stone (wherever I lay my hat is my home) it doesn't quite work when I get some attachment to people. And I'll be doing it again when I move down south...
Daft Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 I've had a friend I've known for 18 years. A load I've known for 10 and way more I've known for about 5 years. I don't go really far out of my way to keep in contact. I kind of find it makes sense that if you're going to be friends it shouldn't ever seem like too much of an effort (So I'd probably go to more lengths for someone I've known longer).
Josh64 Posted May 6, 2010 Posted May 6, 2010 It's something that everyone has to go through I suppose, just look at Ash, Misty and Brock! (Slits wrists over misty) I've always found saying goodbye hard but like a lot of you have said, recently it's been much easier to keep in touch with people through the use of Facebook and so whilst I don't see my friends everyday, every month or two I arrange a day to meet them all, have muchos fun and bask in their amazingness. If you really like these people that you speak of i'm sure that you can stay in touch no matter how little you see them. Sure, it's not as good as seeing them everyday but at least they will still be a part of your life. People move on, move away, have their own lives and sadly it's just something you have to deal with.
jayseven Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Growing up I don't think I was ever really aware of the finality of some of the goodbyes, but recent years I've become very aware of who I still keep in touch with, and who I don't. I, like daft, have a couple of Friends Through Time, with whom it really doesn't matter how often we keep in touch. This summer I'll probably be saying goodbye to sheffield (uncertain still), and if I do I'll be saying goodbye (or at least, farewell!) to several of my best friends, and to several of my own best years. Or I'll just send them a postcard...
Wesley Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 goooooodbyeeee my frieeeend. i never something or other lalalalallla
weeyellowbloke Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 "Don't you forget about me...don't, don't, don't. Don't you forget about me, Bah bababaaaah" Simple Minds is always a good leaving gift. I remember leaving uni,it was quite a depressing moment as one by one my housemates of 4 years packed up and left. The whole campus just felt so vacant. We still all meet up now and again, go paintballing and stuff, but it's not quite the same as the days when we'd go out drinking and then stay up playing Mario Kart and throwing pasta at one another until dawn. Halcyon days they were.
Ganepark32 Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Have to agree with Ash and Daft. It's nice and all trying to continue a friendship over MSN or similar but it's really not the same. You lose part of what made a friendship good and it slowly/quickly dissipates to something unrecognisable. I've had it happen with friends who I've had to say goodbye to and were close friends for 6 or so years. Because there's no face to face communication, or little of it, you kind of drift apart. Saying that though, I have friends who I've know for many years and the only way we keep in touch is through MSN. We don't really speak all that often but we were the kind of friends that meant we wouldn't really need to communicate all the time to stay friends. Still, I'm not great with goodbyes. Several arguments with ex-friends over the last few years when saying goodbye act as testament to that. Although I do feel that sort of makes the thing go a lot smoother. Nothing like a good argument to get over the sadness of the occasion
EEVILMURRAY Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Well there's that but you can't hang out, drink and play pool on facebook (well you probably can, but it would suck). And conversation doesn't flow as easily/naturally on facebook. Oh well, that's life eh. Very true, but it's better than nothing. T'was bullshit saying goodbye to everyone at uni, Facebook is all we have!
Gizmo Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Well its my last day of high school on Tuesday, so we'll see how it goes.
Shorty Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Had to say goodbye to my family as I left the country for a year once. Bawled, but in a manly way.
Pancake Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 I love Facebook. And i actually feel like i know several people better because of it. For example people post personal thoughts that they probably would never have come out with if me and them had been chatting casually. It's probably because i'm socially awkward i guess.
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted May 7, 2010 Posted May 7, 2010 Fudge. This still makes me cry to this very day.
Beast Posted May 12, 2010 Posted May 12, 2010 I found it very weird saying goodbye when I was in secondary school. The last ever day I saw quite a few of them was when we got our GCSE results and we all just hugged each other and said "Good luck". I still speak to nearly all of my friends who I cared about most and who I used to hang around with at lunchtimes. With my friends, they already had my number and e-mail so I knew we'd always be the same. With the people who I used to have a chat with, we exchange numbers and e-mail addresses, knowing that they wouldn't bother and I was right, they didn't really but it didn't really bother me so much. That's life, people move on I suppose. My first college was the same. Before our year ended, I gave the people who I liked my number and e-mail address and out of six, three talk to me. My second college was full of nutters and I didn't really get on with any of them, I was the odd one out so I didn't care but I miss being in the first college. Goodbyes are really hard but one way or another, if you really like the person as a friend, you'll get in touch with each other again somehow.
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