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Epic.

 

I came in here to complain about neighbours playing bollywood loud enough for me, a deaf man, to wake up by it at 3am and not get back to sleep after I'd gone round to complain 'til 5 -- but your post makes it seem pretty trivial!

 

Happy veeday, suckers!

 

Although they're both pretty trivial! Chair got £750 too.

 

I've got a "family" meal today.

 

Seeing my sister, father, and some "second ish" cousins. I think they're my dads cousins/my "god mother" shes awesome and they all are. :)

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I know I didn't go out the the other week but that was by choice as I didn't want to. This weekend, I've not been out because I didn't know anyone who was off out to begin with. There was a possibility off going out last night but my mate wanted to save his money so he could go shopping with his girlfriend today... damn you valentine's day...

 

And Amazon have informed me they are having supplier problems and aren't sure when they are going to be able to ship my game from them.

 

So not the most entertaining of weekends on record.

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I'm going to attempt to remove the broken indicator bulb from my car.

 

I also need some milk.

 

And a new indicator bulb.

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Been socalising the last few days. Shocker. Post-lecture drinking and pool/snookering. Shame I live so damn far away that I can never stay for long but enjoy it while there etc. Yesterday I photographed a wedding which turned into a mix between work and socalising. Got on quite well with the bride and groom and they asked me to stop til the end and pay for my taxi home (even after I mentioned I live 20 miles away). But today has been sleeeep. Much needed.

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On Friday, I began my trek to visit the female. I'm sat on the National Express behind a bloke who has his chair reclined back for the whole 3 hours. At one point, he even gets up to visit the toilet - which I am sat next to, of course. He looks at me, looks at how crammed I look, and then goes back to sleep in his chair. I could have killed heeeeem.

 

I'm staring out of the window, when my phone starts to ring. It's my agency, and they tell me that they've got some work for me. It turns out that a teacher is sick and his some kind of other problems (which I kinda wanted to know about, cos I'm nosey, but I didn't ask and they didn't tell, hehe) so she may be off work...until Easter. They needed someone to cover that class 5 days a Week, for one week initially. If the teacher isn't back after that first week, then it could be for 5 weeks until Easter.

 

My initial reaction was...if only you frickin' rang me the day before! I explained how I'd already said yes to that 2 day a week thing with another agency, and I felt instantly gutted. So, they said it was nice that I wanted to stay loyal to the other agency because they asked first, but that I should also look after myself...so they said to think about it.

 

I rang the other agency, spoke to the woman, and she advised that I take the other 5 day a week work. I asked if she was sure about that, and she said that it's fine, I need to get as much work as possible, etc. So, I rang the other lady back and confirmed that with her.

 

What's more, I've also been put on "guaranteed pay" for 3 days a week for when my stint at that school finishes. If they only need me for the week, then I go straight into that, which means that even if no work comes in for me during that week, I still get paid 3 days worth. So, I'm guaranteed 3 days worth of pay a week...which is fucking awesome considering this line of work! I could have done with that before Christmas, heh.

 

So, I met up with Ine, she's gone to work for a few hours, and I woke up this morning feeling megasick. I'm sat on her bed watching the football on her laptop, whilst listening to the Moon Soundtrack.

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Tis been alright today, Rugby wasn't much to be honest. But at least England won, which i liked. Got a home game tonight with Pool, should be interesting.

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Tis been alright today, Rugby wasn't much to be honest. But at least England won, which i liked. Got a home game tonight with Pool, should be interesting.

I enjoyed Brian Moore's commentary more than the actual Rugby... ''Enough of that, this is not football!''.

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Day has been lazy. Like all my days seem to be.

 

Only thing I've done today was walk the dogs on the beach. One of which, thinks it's great fun to nick other people's stuff and not give it back for about 10 minutes. Also discovered that the Guitar Hero Metallica I bought yesterday does not work properly and that I will have to return it. Going to order Guitar Hero Van Halen from Play instead - which apparently comes with a free Guitar and World Tour... I may even just sell Van Halen on - I really don't like them :heh:

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Good day at work - everyone in full spirits, pranking and joking and only mildly molesting. I kinda harshly had a go at a female colleague who essentially floats from dept. to dept. not actually doing anything, and I know for a fact others are annoyed at it. I've spent weeks subtly prodding her towards doing her job... but today =

 

"So are you actually going to do the job you're paid to do? First you're here doing nothing, then over there standing around chatting, then I see you come in here, stick these up, not pick any [stupid work lingo] and now you're walking back over there?"

 

"but I've broken me arm[/smile on face]!"

 

"Yeah, sure, whatever"

 

... This was in earshot of the stockroom manager who stayed silent and the other sub-management team who one-by-one said 'she had it coming'... but the rest of the shift she would give me the eyes-of-a-woman-scorned, and her mum works there too, so I've obviously made a mistake and now I will have ENEMIES at work. Woo.

 

 

The whole 'accidental v-day date' is called off. I messaged her on fb, texted her and then called her after work and she eventually got back in touch to say she had forgotten about it (again) and 'made other plans', ahem, so I've gone from fajitas and martini with roses and love 4 years ago, to cider, mild drugs and burying mice 2 years ago to a rather default cider-and-meal-for-one-that-I-found-in-the-discount-bit-in-sainsbury's night in with MW2 and UFC!

 

 

I've recently realised I don't actually realise I'm in this reality like I used to/everyone else does. I mostly float in my inner world of connotative thinking and unconnected, self-constructed obstacles. I've also startlingly noticed my eyes are draining, and I should really actively seek sympathy. It's like watching a bad handheld cam copy of my own life, with my bodily actions slightly out of sync with reality.

 

L.G. FUAD.

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Done nothing all day, which is how I intended to spend it. Watched and finished Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles and wish they'd had another series instead of Dollhouse. Though while a tantalising ending ripe for another season, It's tied up enough, sort of. Anyway.

 

Lovely roast dinner. Yum.

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I'm cold, I have the flu, I'm struggling for breath from my asthma and nobody loves me.

 

Happy Valentines Day everyone!

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I'm cold, I have the flu, I'm struggling for breath from my asthma and nobody loves me.

 

Happy Valentines Day everyone!

 

I love you. :hug:

 

I went to Quasar with a couple of friends today, it was damn awesome - chasing little kids in an entirely legal manner has never been such fun!

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I'm cold, I have the flu, I'm struggling for breath from my asthma and nobody loves me.

 

Happy Valentines Day everyone!

 

:love::love::love: but but I love you! :D

 

Get better soon!

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Pffft, I don't need your pity! No-one can POSSIBLY understand how I feel! I'm going to my room to put on too much mascara and let the world see my paaaaaiiiin!

 

Seriously though, appreciate it. Loves you both too. <3

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I woke up at 11:30, walked to the Rad Cam. Held hands with strangers (there was a same-sex hand holding event in recognition of a gay man that was stabbed in Oxford). Got on a coach to London.

 

Joined the "London For A Secular Europe" march, from Marble Arch to the Italian Embassy. Outside the Italian Embassy, we stood about (it was freezing), and people shouted, and then Peter Tatchell spoke on a megaphone. Too many valid points were raised.

 

My feet were too cold, so we ran to Selfridges. Annoyingly, there was a power cut, and half the shop (all the brands you want to buy) was shut. I saw this Alexander McQueen sweater with an eagle across the front which actually stunned (it was £665 though...).

 

I saw some lovely trainers, which were only £50, but they didn't have them in my size. Nor did they have any of those Orange Star Wars shoes left. Apparently some woman bought about 20 pairs at once...

 

We then had dinner in a pizza restaurant in Soho. I had tasty lasagne.

 

Then got the coach home, and realised how great I'm A Lady by Santigold is.

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found out my mates back from leeds for a few days so we are out on the lash tommorow.

 

goodbye social responsibility, hello behaviour not beffiting of a group of adults.

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So the only thing that I have done today remotely related to Valentines day is find Heart Pieces in Twilight Princess;)

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Recently (recent weeks/month) I've been feeling the need to initiate change far more than I ever have in the past. Despite wanting the same things for ages.

 

I'm so tempted to just go and do stuff. Actually get a tatto that I keep meaning to. I considered getting something pierced but at the moment it feels needless since I don't actually want anything pierced.

 

I need new clothes too.

 

I decided I need a job since realistically I'll probably end up destitute/dead if I don't get some real experience soon. Plus I'll need money to live.

 

I'm applying to work part-time at Build-A-Bear Workshop, which stuns, but I'm scared will break me as a person only so tolerant of rude children.

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Spent the day with my girlfriend, had some pancakes for breakfast, steak for dinner. Basically just watched movies all day. T'was a swell time.

Then my sister phoned me. I ran outside to answer. And I answered. And she said. Yes. She said: "GUESS WHAT!? Your school sent you a cheque in the post. For £750. For being an exceptional student."

There has to be a catch. Is it a pay off?

 

[Also, she opened your mail? Disgraceful.]

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Recently (recent weeks/month) I've been feeling the need to initiate change far more than I ever have in the past. Despite wanting the same things for ages.

 

I'm so tempted to just go and do stuff. Actually get a tatto that I keep meaning to. I considered getting something pierced but at the moment it feels needless since I don't actually want anything pierced.

 

I need new clothes too.

 

Story of my life.

 

In the past few weeks I've re-examined my whole life more than I have done in my whole life put together.

 

And my new thing is spending money where it needs to be spent, because I've realised the act of spending money is so significant in itself. Like, spending £150 on _YES_ boots (I've yet to see a pair though) it so worth it, if you wear them and love.

 

Also, spending money on music is so essential. I realised today on the coach home that quite alot of my music has made me think about things. Like The Execution Of All Things by Rilo Kiley. Too great. Probably would have spent up to £30 on it, had I known what effect it would have on me. So worth the £6 I bought it for.

 

There has to be a catch. Is it a pay off?

 

No catch. Some rich guy died and left the school loads of money to give to students as bursarsies.

 

I got all As at Higher and A-Level, and got into Oxford (which no one from the rival school achieved). That's probably earned the school far more than £750 in raising the school's performance.

 

[Also, she opened your mail? Disgraceful.]

 

Yeah! I was like "emmm... why did you open it?". She said she didn't have her glasses on, saw that it was from the school and assumed it was for her (my mum's an ambassador for the school). Either way, I deal with it.

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Story of my life.

 

In the past few weeks I've re-examined my whole life more than I have done in my whole life put together.

 

Yeah.

 

I kinda felt like if I didn't get in anywhere this year (which I feel is going to happen) that I shouldn't be so annoyed/upset by it. I'd sort of treated Uni as trying to "keep up" with people and stuff, yet I'd almost prefer to just go off somewhere and live for 4 months. Like Arizona or something. Just sit in a cave and write a word a day of a 23 page book.

 

I genuinely would love to just go and have nothing be on my mind for a long stretch. Or rather, nothing that conflicts with anything else. Hmm.

 

I listened in such interest when my australian art tutor told me she once lived with an aboriginal commune/commune/group for a month because her car broke down and no one ever passed where they were. The people were just like "Let's have jokes". I just want to take Scarlet's Walk.

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My joke friend James lived in an anarchistic commune for 3 months during his 2 year "gap year" (he only decided he wanted to do a degree when he was 20, because school had left such a bad taste in his mouth).

 

I need to do something over the summer. Go to Canada, and couch surf.

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I just want to go on a Pokemon journey, where people are too open with strangers.

 

I'm so tired of the fact humans judge and complain. I just want to sit *does his hand movement for "sit", slowly waving his hands, palms-downward, up and down*. I wish people were more open to just living for the fact they're alive and there's someone in front of them.

 

Let me be weak. Let me sleep.

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