Posted October 9, 2013 I think hitting on the arm is OK (nothing wrong with a bit of bruises, provided she didn't injure your arm). Face isn't OK though. She grabbed me on the arm and dug her nails in. I thought you'd broken up, did I miss the bit where you got back together? Violence is certainly bad, has she ever done it before?. Yeah we got back together... She's never hit me before, it's usually psychological with her. "My friends are going on holiday, if we don't have any money for the holiday and for you to pay for my car service then it means that you don't love me." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Left a pair of bruises on my arm like a two pound coin, my face was numb and swollen the next day. Your wife must have the strangest shaped hands... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Yeah we got back together... She's never hit me before, it's usually psychological with her. "My friends are going on holiday, if we don't have any money for the holiday and for you to pay for my car service then it means that you don't love me." Why did you get back together? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Why did you get back together? I wanted to give us another chance, I thought to myself that we'd put all the effort in we should try to figure it all out. She was lovely for about the first two months back together. @Daft that's PRECISELY what I said to her the other day... We were talking about going back to the UK for Christmas and she was demanding that I pay for more of her tickets, and I was trying to explain her that if I give her more money that I have already budgeted, it means I need to go out and do more work. First she came back with the "if you don't it means you don't love me!" Then when that got her nowhere "you're a bad husband, other people earn more than you!" I told her she was "poisonous" and tried to jump out of the moving car. Funny that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 I know I have, like, no authority to speak on relationship matters, but ... bro, your relationship sounds incredibly detrimental. I mean, psychological and now physical abuse? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 I know I have, like, no authority to speak on relationship matters, but ... bro, your relationship sounds incredibly detrimental. I mean, psychological and now physical abuse? Yeah I can't help but feel that you'd be far better out of it than in it. Think of all the money you'd save if she is forcing you to buy her loads of stuff. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Leave. Everyone has suggested it for over a year now I'm sure. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Remember that this is somebody's life-long marriage we're talking about. Please try to remember that when you casually tell him to throw it all away, from the confines of your bedroom, 6000 miles away, after hearing just a snippet of a one sided argument, from just half of the couple, merely venting some relationship anger on a nintendo forum. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Remember that this is somebody's life-long marriage we're talking about. Please try to remember that when you casually tell him to throw it all away, from the confines of your bedroom, 6000 miles away, after hearing just a snippet of a one sided argument, from just half of the couple, merely venting some relationship anger on a nintendo forum. Several snippets of several arguments/incidents over a long period of time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Several snippets of several arguments/incidents over a long period of time. So, a periodic venting of anger? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 @Iun, are you exaggerating and simply periodically venting your anger? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Remember that this is somebody's life-long marriage we're talking about. Please try to remember that when you casually tell him to throw it all away, from the confines of your bedroom, 6000 miles away, after hearing just a snippet of a one sided argument, from just half of the couple, merely venting some relationship anger on a nintendo forum. She physically abused her husband. What would you say if it happened the other way around? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 She physically abused her husband. What would you say if it happened the other way around? Exactly the same as I just did. I'm not convinced that a small tap constitutes physical abuse, not matter which way round the genders. The fact is that you're making such a huge, life changing recommendation, based on a very limited, one-sided account. For all we know Iun could be a serial abuser of his wife, and she was finally taking her revenge. I'm certain that's not the case, but we don't have anywhere near the amount of information necessary to say "leave her" or "she's poisonous". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Exactly the same as I just did. I'm not convinced that a small tap constitutes physical abuse, not matter which way round the genders. The fact is that you're making such a huge, life changing recommendation, based on a very limited, one-sided account. For all we know Iun could be a serial abuser of his wife, and she was finally taking her revenge. I'm certain that's not the case, but we don't have anywhere near the amount of information necessary to say "leave her" or "she's poisonous". You can only advise on the information you're given. We're not advising in any professional manner, people can only give their opinion relevant to what they know, in this case that's Iun, not his wife. As you say there might be much more to it but I don't think anyone's about to fly over to China, so unless Iun's wife joins the forum, you can only go on what he says and I personally see no reason to disbelieve him. You say it's easy for someone thousands of miles away in a bedroom to dole out advice, what makes you think they don't have first hand experience in this very matter. Again, it's all what ifs. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 You can only advise on the information you're given. We're not advising in any professional manner, people can only give their opinion relevant to what they know, in this case that's Iun, not his wife. As you say there might be much more to it but I don't think anyone's about to fly over to China, so unless Iun's wife joins the forum, you can only go on what he says and I personally see no reason to disbelieve him. You say it's easy for someone thousands of miles away in a bedroom to dole out advice, what makes you think they don't have first hand experience in this very matter. Again, it's all what ifs. Which is precisely why people shouldn't be saying "you should leave her". Another point, Iun only came on here to vent, he didn't ask for advice on his relationship (whether or not he wanted it). How would you feel if you made a one line post about an argument you had with your girlfriend and everyone started posting, "You should leave that bitch"? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Which is precisely why people shouldn't be saying "you should leave her". Another point, Iun only came on here to vent, he didn't ask for advice on his relationship (whether or not he wanted it). How would you feel if you made a one line post about an argument you had with your girlfriend and everyone started posting, "You should leave that bitch"? You're posting on a forum, surely it's expected that there may be a response. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 From what I have heard, I don't particularly like Iun's wife. I like Iun though. A lot. I hope he sorts it out. Oh man. I will write properly when on my PC, but today at work everything went wrong. Literally so horrendous. And you may recall me saying I had a headache a few weeks ago. Still got it. It is hopefully a chronic tension rather than anything serious (been to doctor) but it makes work less fun. Ugh. Yeah basically. So that thing that I mentioned before, yesterday was the last day (of eight full 24 hour days) but of course people are spasticated and they leave it to the last minute which means if there is any problem it leaves no time for it to be resolved. We had so many problems. - Phone line problems (crackling). - Cannot dial out due to capacity. - Our card payment provider went down. - Our website went down. In the middle of all this happening, our calls were at a 45 minute waiting time. 99.9% of the time our calls are at a 0 second waiting time. We are not one of the companies where you have to wait a while to get through. So yeah, 45 minute wait, about 50 calls waiting. - Fire alarm. We looked around and no one could believe it. In the fire procedure, we shut the phone lines off. So all those people waiting got cut off. That got resolved and we went back in. I had a couple of complaints today but it wasn't too bad. Today was absolutely glorious in comparison in fact. But yesterday was incredibly, incredibly stressful. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 ohh flip that sounds like a shit day >_> Makes me grateful that my workplace is rarely that chaotic! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 I have had a pretty crappy day at work too, just way too busy... Basically my German colleague is on holiday for two weeks, which means that there is only one other German to cover the German emails that come in. However, she is already busy with another product's queue and is not amazing at the other one (the colleague who is on holiday is great at it). So basically, I am covering the German emails for two weeks now. It is absolutely mental. I have to keep churning out email after email just to stay in SLA. I don't even speak German, so you can imagine how hard this is. On top of that, I still have to cover my own Dutch queue and the Czech queue (I don't speak Czech, but at least on that one I am allowed to reply in English). Today I did a total of 67 emails, plus I still helped others with their cases and prepared some drafts for the other German agent to send out. We are expected to do about 4-5 cases per hour. I did about 9.5. Didn't even receive a thank you, no question about how I was coping with the workload. Nothing. Urgh. I feel completely drained. And there is still one and a half week left. And I just checked and there's already about a 100 emails waiting for tomorrow. =( Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 So, a periodic venting of anger? I'd probably say that the reason so many people on N-E are telling @Iun to leave his wife because it borderlines on abuse. If it were a woman in this situation - what would you say? I do however, regardless of my opinion, hope that @Iun is able to work things out, whether this is with his wife or not. Its surely not easy! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 After pissing around for 2 days trying to get this phone they've cancelled my order because their security team has a problem with my passport. I asked what exactly the problem was and they can't discuss it. Ugh, I'm so pissed off. I have no good way of putting it, so I'll just say that AffordableMobiles are fucking shit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Which is precisely why people shouldn't be saying "you should leave her". Another point, Iun only came on here to vent, he didn't ask for advice on his relationship (whether or not he wanted it). How would you feel if you made a one line post about an argument you had with your girlfriend and everyone started posting, "You should leave that bitch"? We've heard so much about her over the past couple of years. The stuff she is doing and saying to him is just not what someone who loves you does. She's using him as a meal ticket, puts him down constantly and now even physically abuses him. He already left her once, so we know it must be pretty bad and not just a case of us hearing snippets of over-exaggerated detail. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Oh cripes, my brother just called to mention my dad's going to hospital following some blood tests for a scan to check for prostate cancer. Don't need that drama right now. ... she was demanding that I pay for more of her tickets, and I was trying to explain her that if I give her more money that I have already budgeted, it means I need to go out and do more work. First she came back with the "if you don't it means you don't love me!" Then when that got her nowhere "you're a bad husband, other people earn more than you!" I told her she was "poisonous" and tried to jump out of the moving car. I haven't seen this many red flags appear all at once since the start of the . Yes, that's right. Sometimes I make sports references to illustrate things. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 9, 2013 Oh no @gaggle64. Hope everything's ok with your dad -- I still haven't got my freakin xray results. Today was day 14 of my 10-14 day wait.... *starting to get impatient* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
