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Posted

Supergrunch, youve probably been asked this loads, so...sorry for that. But the quote under your signature, who said that? I keep reading and it doesnt make any sense to me, what about the sun? Is it a joke? I am but a layman, be gentle! :smile:

Posted

Anything by Spike Miligan, pure comic genius

 

"A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree."

 

"The British Army Works like this - If you hang a man and he dies, keep hanging him until he gets used to it."

 

"When I look back, the fondest memory I have is not really of the Goons. It is of a girl called Julia with enormous breasts."

 

"Well, we can't stand around here doing nothing, people will think we're workmen."

Posted

"I've got meanness in me. And some of you girls have meanness in you too. And it's not necessarily something I know we're very proud of. Well...sometimes I'm not when I'm vvvvvvvvicious. And that usually happens because...ohhhh god... who knows why. But it's funny when it happens and you just become one of these like um...you know those comic books? Sven the berserker? Well, it'd be nice if I had a better understanding of it. And I think those of you that have those crazy tempers know what I'm talking about. Now some of you are at the other end of those crazy tempers, which isn't that fun either is it? Or maybe it is, isn't it, you little mmmMmmMmm, you little gimp, you! (snort-laughs) But um, the thing is, this girl I knew once named Marianne, was the absolutely, you know, coolest. She was totally cool. And yet, she didn't have this meanness in her. She had so many other things in her, you know, but meanness wasn't one of them. So, when I was hangin around her, I didn't need to have this meanness. Basically when my mother said, 'hey, um, oh my god...Marianne killed herself.' The only thing I could think of was, 'Fuck you, mom.' Because, in truth, nobody was really the same after Marianne killed herself."

-- Tori intro to Marianne; Milwaukee, WI 06/08/96

Posted
Supergrunch, youve probably been asked this loads, so...sorry for that. But the quote under your signature, who said that? I keep reading and it doesnt make any sense to me, what about the sun? Is it a joke? I am but a layman, be gentle! :smile:

Some random guy who on a ssbm forum who thought he could disprove evolution with the second law of thermodynamics - he seems to forget about the Sun. :heh:

Posted
Anything by Spike Miligan, pure comic genius

 

"A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree."

It doesn't work for the One Piece Crew!

 

20030712_12_July_2003_One_Piece_The_Going_Merry_zoom_Odaiba_Tokyo_Japan.jpg

 

A funny one by Frankie Boyle I love is:

 

"Clear your debts in one easy payment; buy a shotgun and blow your head off."

 

 

Some random guy who on a ssbm forum who thought he could disprove evolution with the second law of thermodynamics - he seems to forget about the Sun.

 

You have to give us contact info/details about this guy, as we need to ask him what was going through his head...

Posted

Holy shite, I just......Oh God there are so many things......I just need to comment on.......Gah.

 

Born perfect, no sun, were all sinners........my head hurts and he his a prime example of whats wrong with the internet.

Posted
Some random guy who on a ssbm forum who thought he could disprove evolution with the second law of thermodynamics - he seems to forget about the Sun. :heh:

 

Ah so he knows the second law of thermodynamics, but he is an idiot. Fair enough.

Posted

Haha, what a creationist loser! I see he tried to explain and justify on the next page that 'the sun doesn't count' with a really flimsy reason. That is so shoddy yet brilliant at the same time.

I like alot of quotes about procrastination, cos I'm such a procrastinator. I've got some slightly amazing things done whilst procrastinating(things I would never have done otherwise) and I find the first quote incredibly fitting. I sometimes think I could probably rule the world if it wasn't what I was supposed to be doing.

 

"Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he's supposed to be doing at the moment."

 

"Procrastination is like masturbation, It's fun until you realize you just fucked yourself".

 

"If it weren't for the last minute, I wouldn't get anything done."

Posted

More serious quotes before I move onto the funny ones:

 

History makes some amends for the shortness of human life.

 

If you want a vision of the future, imagine a boot stamping on a human face- forever.

 

All animals are equal. But some animals are more equal than others.

 

The animals outside looked from the pigs to the humans; from the humans to the pigs; then from the pigs to the humans again. But already it was impossible to say which was which.

 

We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the landing grounds; we shall fight on the beaches; we shall fight in the streets and in the hills; we shall never surrender.

 

It's time for the human race to enter the Solar System.
Posted

If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.

- Woody Allen

 

I shot my typewriter once with a Nine Millimeter. Bastard never knew what hit it.

- Hunter S. Thompson

 

"I was saying boo-urns." - Hans Moleman

 

"Sperm is like lending a fiver, you can't really ask for it back." - Peep Show

 

"Fabric said they didn't want the mix (How dumb is that? Justice could fart through a vocoder and it would go double uranium.)" - Random Internet Comment

 

"I feel the same way about disco as I do about herpes."

- Hunter S. Thompson

 

"I Am Lightning, the rain transformed."

-Raiden, MGS4

 

I have always found that mercy bears richer fruit than strict justice.

- Abe Lincoln

 

"Last night I dreamt

That somebody loved me.

No hope, no harm,

Just another false alarm." - The Smiths

 

Man—every man—is an end in himself, not the means to the ends of others.

- Ayn Rand

 

"Your confusion, my illusion, worn like a mask of self-hate, confronts and then dies." - Ian Curtis, Joy Division

 

"You want to know how I did it? This is how I did it, Anton. I never saved anything for the swim back."

- Vincent, Gattaca

 

Nothing in the world is worth having or worth doing unless it means effort, pain, difficulty... I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life. I have envied a great many people who led diffcult lives and led them well.

- Theodore Roosevelt

 

 

Those who speak of love most promiscuously are the ones who've never felt it. They make some sort of feeble stew out of sympathy, compassion, contempt and general indifference, and they call it love.

- Gail Wynand

 

 

 

To sell your soul is the easiest thing in the world. That’s what everybody does every hour of his life. If I asked you to keep your soul - would you understand why that is much harder?

- Howard Roark

 

Every form of happiness is private. Our greatest memories are personal, self-motivated, not to be touched. The things which are sacred or precious to us are the things we withdraw from promiscuous sharing.

- Gail Wynand

 

 

To be nobody-but-yourself -- in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else -- means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.

- E. E. Cummings

 

 

No More Games. No More Bombs. No More Walking. No More Fun. No More Swimming. 67. That is 17 years past 50. 17 more than I needed or wanted. Boring. I am always bitchy. No Fun — for anybody. 67. You are getting Greedy. Act your old age. Relax — This won't hurt.

- Hunter S. Thompson

Posted

^ yeh unfortunately for them they made an arse of themselves by coming up with a fake name for something in the stomach which Actimel is supposed to help and so they sort of put their foot in it. Biffidus Digestivum.

Posted

"Your always bellowing man, your like a yak!"

my mate simon, at the pub, after id been accused of being loud.

 

and simons mate, a question for 63336 (txt for knolage)

"Who is harder to beat in a fight, whoopie goldberg in the moving room from that jameriqui video, or harrison ford on a yatch?"

Posted
It sounds like the kind of thing Barry Scott would be shouting about.

 

'Hi, I'm Barry Scott and this is new Cillit Bang Biffidus Digestivum!'

 

They don't even know what the stuff does, that's why they're so vague with how it helps your body. It's essentially just yoghurt that simple people think is helping them. :p


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