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Posted

Extract from http://bellmanic.netepic.org/

 

 

They wouldn’t stop. Grabbing at our luggage. Trying to shake our hands.

 

It reminded me of when i visited Egypt.

 

When i was collecting my bags at the terminal i saw a man waiting for his luggage to arrive on the conveabelt. As he stood there a local man appeared next to him. And when the bag arrived without asking aided the owner as he lifted it up.

 

The man thanked him but the local wanted money.

 

That’s the sad truth of Egypt nothing is free.

 

I was once making my way back to my hotel when my path crossed with that of a security guard. We exchanged pleasantries and then were both greeted by a rather manky but friendly cat, which didn’t have a tail.

 

I stroked the cat and he laughed as we both commented on how it looked. After that he then asked me for some money.

 

To this day i still do not know what for.

 

Was it for talking to him or stroking the disease infested cat?

 

Was Thailand going to be the same?

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Posted

I speak Spanish to god, Italian to women, France to men and German to my horse!

Charles V

 

Cogito Ergo Sum (I think therefore i am)

Descartes

 

I love saying that sentence because at first you look like your just babbling something and when you explain what it means, people forget you just sounded like a toddler

Posted

Karl Pilkington -

 

 

 

"All I'm saying is that old people need to be old people. You need oldness. You need to see old people. You need to go "Right, they might have a solution they've been on the earth longer. Quick, we need an answer. How old are yer? - I'm 32 - Well you look 78!" "

 

 

On identical twins - "You always get a little snidey one."

 

 

"It's just easier to put stuff off once we've got this calendar, whereas if we didn't have a date you'd have to do everythin' straight away...Say if I was in charge and someone said that buildin' needs knockin' down, it's dangerous, if we didn't have a calendar we'd go, "erm lets do it now then." Whereas 'cos we've got a calendar it's easy to say..."next Wednesday'"

Posted
"Words create lies. Pain can be trusted"

 

From Ôdishon.

 

Awesome quote....I wasn't a fan of the film for obvious reasons..."Teek teek teek!!!" :heh:

 

This is from a really old Japanese book of poetry:

 

"In all this world, what home is ours forever?"

Posted

This thread can't die yet. Double quote ressurect a go-go:

 

"There may be dreams but never love, never home. Never a hand to hold yours when squadrons of birds flock across the burnt-orange sun at the close of day."

 

"Broken glass in the morning, broken heart at night."

Posted

"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever." - Woody Allen

 

"The ruler is the boat, the common people are the water. It is the water that bears up the boat but also the water that capsizes it." Xunzi (ca.310-ca. 215 B.C.E.)

Posted

"Ladies and gentlemen, uh, we've just lost the picture, but what we've seen speaks for itself. The Corvair spacecraft has apparently been taken over -- 'conquered' if you will -- by a master race of giant space ants. It's difficult to tell from this vantage point whether they will consume the captive earth men or merely enslave them. One thing is for certain: there is no stopping them; the ants will soon be here. And I for one welcome our new insect overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted TV personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground sugar caves."

 

Not the purpose of the thread at all, but all threads need Simpsons quotes in abundance.

Posted

"It's Better to burn out, than to fade away."

 

 

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather. Not screaming in terror like his passengers." - Jim Harkins

 

 

"If God had intended Man to Smoke

He would have set him on Fire."

 

 

"A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic." - Stalin

Posted

Some top Red Foreman quotes.

kurtwood_2002.jpg

Without rules, we all might as well be up in a tree flinging our crap at each other

 

 

What are you going to put put on your resume - dumbass?

 

 

Bob: You know Red, that hurts.

Red: So does a swift kick in the ass.

Bob: You know, Red, a kick in the ass isn't the solution to everything.

Red: I'm afraid I'm gonna have to disagree with that, Bob.

 

 

When my time comes I want to be buried face down. That way whoever doesn't like me can kiss my ass.

 

 

Eric, I thought I told you to wash up for dinner. I know, it's difficult to hear with your head up your ass

 

 

Kelso, you fire that gun in this car, and I will pull over and kick your ass for an hour

 

 

Well, if you don't get your hand out of there, you're gonna have a classic case of Foot-Stuck-In-Ass.

 

 

What the hell kind of a world are we living in? 'Hey, let's date other people.' 'Hey, let's date other people, but ditch them and do it in a car.' In my day, we called them degenerates, and we STONED them.

 

 

Steven, I've come to think of you as a son. So I want to give you some honest, heart-felt advice. Get your head out of your ass.

 

 

You morons just hung a vacancy sign on your asses and my foot's looking for a room!

 

 

Red: [after having a bucket of oatmeal dumped on his head] What the hell is going on?

Eric: Dad, it was just a prank that went wrong. Horribly... *horribly* wrong.

Red: Really? Well I have a prank too. One where my foot *doesn't* plow through your ass! Let's hope it doesn't go horribly, *horribly* wrong!

Posted

Was at the V&A yesterday and copied this from the Buddhist Lotus Sutra:

 

"Living beings are without number; I vow to row them to the other shore.

 

Defilements are without number; I vow to remove them from myself.

 

The teachings are immeasurable; I vow to study and practice them.

 

The way is very long; I vow to arrive at the end.'

 

I thought that was a nice mantra!

 

Another one I saw in my wanderings around London was:

 

"Our future is greater than out past."

 

I like that one a lot.

Posted

I just put this in the movir thread but fuck it... it deserves twice-a-post:

 

I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. - Blade Runner

 

"bomp bomp BWA now... Bomp bomp Bwa-now bwa-now nowwww..."

 

Works in any conversation.

 

SCRUBS FTW!

Posted
From ReZourceman last night, with regards on how to break the ice with the ladies:

 

ReZourceman - Hey Poozers. says:

I was being serious

ReZourceman - Hey Poozers. says:

Cock in face.

ReZourceman - Hey Poozers. says:

For win.

ReZourceman - Hey Poozers. says:

Under stars

ReZourceman - Hey Poozers. says:

properly romantic

 

Awesome.

 

Yep. Im made of win.

 

God personally sculpted me with his bare hands, out of win.

Posted

"Now i know many of you today, walked in with numbers allready swimming in your heads; 360, 16:9, 1080, 8.2GHz. Well, we'd like to add one more number to the mix, and that number.....is 2." - Reggie Fils-Aime, ass kicker and name taker.


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