The Bard

Maybe it's the Youtube compression, but that looks about as good as NFS: Most Wanted running on a high end PC. Colour me not that impressed.

Some hilarious incongruities. Somehow you're saying it merited an above average/ good score, but that it was "awful and the worst Zelda ever." Wind Waker didn't really deserve a 10 even when it came out, since in the playing of it, it borrowed its template very heavily from the N64 game, which in themselves were structurally ripped straight from A Link to the Past (which is to my mind the last truly innovative console Zelda game). The merit of the game lay in the way it brought a storybook world to life, and tweaking a few animations and giving it a HD makeover isn't going to do much to either recreate that experience ten years later, nor allow it to compete with the best games out today. Wonderful game, but this update is really only for the the hardcore Zelda fans looking to experience the game as it exists in their memory rater than how it actually would be to play it on GC hooked up to an SDTV today.

You're a fucking omnishambles @Ashley.

Starting my Master's in two weeks. Went to the UCL quad this afternoon, and it looks fucking stately and beautiful as hell. Can't wait to kick it there with a glass of port and a good book. Apparently Master's degrees are hard doe. Ain't looking forward to that.

My PC will ruin that shit. I might get another 7870 to kick the GPU memory from 2 to 4gb. That is, if I end up buying this in the first place. It doesn't look like there's much beyond what BF3 offered, which in itself was a step backwards from BC2. I'd love the equivalent of BF3 multiplayer, but with full on destructibility.

Oh Rez...god damn. You are king troll. This is present progressive. What you want is past perfect.

I want the details but I don't I said "reasonably attractive" Ohoooo somebody stop meh. I kid, don't kill me

Oh my god that looks amazing. Was a huge fan of Guilty Gear XX on PS2, looks like I'm going to have to dish for another two arcade sticks.

I've read about a third of the bible. I've read the Quran in full. They're both banal and unremarkable books undoubtedly written by banal and unremarkable people. At this point, so much of the bible and Christian doctrine is inscribed into culture as handed down by parents that you don't need first hand knowledge to get the gist. Anyway, the test of any purportedly divine ideology is the way it interacts with humanity; on this count, all Abrahmic religions flunk with flying colours.

It means they believe in some diaphanous cosmic warden that'll shepherd their souls after their earthly bodies decompose, because they're woefully incapable of conceiving a world that exists apart from their consciousness.

Well yeah, I already have girlfriend, so it's not an issue, I just thought it was funny. Been thinking of making a fake female profile on Ok Cupid and extending troll night from forums to dating services. All I need to do is find some reasonably attractive girl's myspace page, rip the pics, make a profile and accost some hapless fedora wearing beard farmer on OKC before sending him pictures of my taint.

It's more the "before you die" part that's worrying me, not that she knows someone who went to Birkbeck. Also, she looks like a cross between a pug and a chihuahua.

I keep getting messages from this one girl on OKCupid. Her last was "One of my friends recently did a Masters in Philosophy at Birkbeck and he really enjoyed it, which I always figure is the most important thing in education right? At least it's something to while away the time before you die." Should I be worried?

Well...Sony still own the the franchise, so here's hoping they throw it to some other studio. Still, I can't imagine a launch window for a Sony console without Wipeout.

Aren't Moogle and Rummy saying the same thing? Maybe my brain is more fucked than I thought.

This is the typical, boilerplate Metal Gear Solid storyline condensed into a forum post: http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=80515369&postcount=137

@Emma, that's bullshit, I know Dan and he ain't that suave.

Yeah, Eevilmurray is like Dorian Gray, except if the inability to age was localised to his brain.

Really like the first background picture you got there Shorty, what is that?

Mate, they just overdid it with the milk in your case. Same character, deceptive complexion

The two games that look the best out of any of the screenshots here are Stalker and Metro 2033. Wonderfully moody atmosphere. Dishonored Bioshock Infinite Far Cry 3 Planetside 2 Mass Effect 3

In light (lol) of the posts above, another thing I love about my body is being brown. I'm brown as fuck, son.

I have a fairly malleable body - 5'11" and I used to be on my University's boxing squad at 12.5 stone and 8-9% body fat, which was pretty much ideal for me. I've been letting that slide pretty much for the last two years since finishing Uni though. I'm down to 12 stone and the body fat has shot up too. One thing I really love about my body is that it doesn't take me a huge amount of time to get fit - same as Daft, I have a tendency to take things to extremes, and at the moment it's been extreme laziness that's been dictating my daily schedule. Getting back to Uni will hopefully shake things up. Being a pure bred Paki I have a reasonable amount of chest hair, which I used to get rid of when I was a bit younger, but I've gotten compliments on it (which might be facetious) from most girls that have had the privilege so I've decided to keep it My head is too big (literally, not figuratively). Also, Zechs, if you're going to help someone, do it by offering more than platitudes any fatuous tit knows about managing weight, presented in an acerbic, presumptuous and frankly cuntish manner. People offer comfort to others in that position because they need some positive reinforcement and emotional encouragement, not some caustic forum fucknut's self congratulatory guide to six-pack abs.

I'm playing too many videogames. I need to have a life. No I don't. Planetside 2- What can I say about this, other than it's mechanically very sound, similar in some ways to Battlefield, except health and shields are upgradable, and the amount of damage you recieve is somewhere between Battlefield and Halo, meaning that even if an enemy spots you first, if you're a more skilled shot, you can quickly snap around and target an area that yields more damage, and likely win the encounter, which I like better than the way it works in BF3 since if you're spotted in that game, you'll likely be dead before you can figure out where you're getting shot from. The scale is unbelievable. Each continent is about the size of fifty of Battlefields biggest maps, can contain a total of 2000 players, and leads to inconceivably colossal encounters. You could be in a squadron of planes charging a citadel and you look down at what seems like a roach hive, upwards of 200 infantrymen on the ground, flanked by a battalion of tanks battling each other to capture territory. It's ridiculous at times. Territory control fluctuates to the point that you could sign off with your faction owning 80% of the map - come back two hours later an it could be below 15%. It looks technically snazzy too, although artistically a little reminiscent of Halo's bland rectilinear shapes and structures. Too much purple too. Dishonored - Getting through the Brigmore Witches DLC. Playing as Daud is a little more liberating, since he's narratively far more ruthless than Corvo, which leaves me at ease to shank motherfuckers left and right. I actually enjoy the game much much more when I'm at liberty to be as lethal as I want. Not that I wasn't during the main game, but there were narrative elements dissuading me from being too much of an asshole, mostly the games central refrain; "We are all born innocent but the world leads us to guilt." Good shit so far. Witcher 2 - Just started this, got to the Assassins Creed gag, chuckled. Very Game of Thrones-esque, and mechanically, very action oriented, which I very love, especially as the action is competently handled. In other words, skill isn't a numerical abstration; you don't just level up and say, oh, I'm more powerful now (although that's an element that's obviously present) but rather, you develop actual tangible proficiency at the skills the game requires you to use. Liking so far. Far Cry 3 - Just finished (played at intervals for 8 months or so). Liked the playing of the game much much more than Far Cry 2, to the point where I think it's one of the best shooters of this generation, but what the fuck was that story? A satire of well intentioned white colonialism? Or just silly guff?

I don't really think it counts as rejection if the guy is seeing someone else though.