The Bard

For clarity; all these things happened, but under the influence of large quantities of alcohol. That doesn't make it any better does it...? Also, I am so smitten it's unreal. Driving up to Durham next week to attend a college formal with the lady and I've not been this giddy and excited for anything in years

I SURE HOPE THEY DO.

Met her when I was five, I've known her properly since I was eight. First crush I had on a girl, and also we've spent the last two weeks talking to each other over six hours every night, in a way that made me feel fucking bewildered that I had the capacity for that much conversation. So, yeah, technically one date, but not really SPEAKING OF DATES NANDO'S TOMORROW NIGHT BITCH. MAN DATE. MANDATE.

Girlfriend get! That's all. Peace. I'm out

He Zwaa'd his way out of Scrubs?

It has Zwaaa dude from Scrubs. SOLD!

Wow, ReZ made a legitimate funny.

To use a word like Faggot or Nigger (for example), in ANY sort of pejorative or stereotypical context is to marginalise the people it was originally used for. These words are incendiary and are emblematic of hundreds of years of social ostracisation. Sometimes my friends and I refer to each other by way of racial epithets that are traditionally used in a negative context, but we do this in the way of a sort of inside joke; by using them as terms of endearment we're consciously inverting their cultural context - but you can't expect any given person you speak to, to be intimately aware of the manner of your speaking. Language is a negotiation between two speaking parties, and outside of the context of close friendship you have to be aware of the myriad connotations any given word is invested with. Combinations of words, clauses, idiosyncratic and novel uses of language to give new inflections to certain words is how language works, sure - many theorists like Bakhtin argue that this heteroglossia in language is actually what gives certain artistic media such as the novel their artistic qualities. But any given contextualisation of these hate terms is always going to be so saturated with the history of their use that by using them in an open social environment, what you're really doing is normalising their incorporation - with all their connotations - into a day to day lexicon. "Language is not an abstract system of nominative forms," any given word is shaped by it's social use, and the historical social uses of these words has been entirely to marginalise a large group of people. At the same time, I'm not aware of "No homo" ever having been used in any context other than an amusing deflection of the idea of your prior statement being sexually charged in any way.

Lol, you can't make this shit up. I would actually pay for at least one issue of this.

I am really excited for the eventual reboot of this series. Hopefully they just keep going with different adjectives until they run out. Personally looking forward to "Elderly Spiderman," "Slightly Dickish Spiderman," possibly even "Criminally Insane Spiderman" played by a heavily drugged Gary Busey, to keep the insanity quota withing manageable bounds.

Very ironic congratulations on continuing to kick the dead horse there, Klaus :p It's usually not too difficult to discern how the person you're talking to wants to have their intentions interpreted - people are rarely subtle with flirting. At that point it just comes to whether you're going to let the little speck of reasonable doubt as to their intentions prevent you from flirting right back. It is a hell of a lot harder to pick up on cues when all of your interactions are text based though - which is what makes online dating a difficult proposition for me.

Was sat in front of my PC for six hours chatting to girl-that-I-have-actual-interest-in, about literally everything last night. She's fucking great, totally brings out the emphatic enthusiasm in me. I just bought us tickets to see Iron & Wine in May. Fingers crossed ^_^

I woke up early on your born day, it's a blessing, the essence of adolescence leaves your body now your fresh and Happy Fucking Birthday! Already got my Nas ticket by the way so I guess I'll see you in a couple of weeks homeslizzle!

This conversation is making me queasy.

Great stuff guys

In my head, and that's definitely all that counts for fact right now.

Apparently in Germany "kicked it" doesn't translate to it's actual meaning of "had freaky sex with."

ALTERED FOR POSTERITY If you want me to kick some lovin' your way all you have to do is ask, sourpuss

It's legitimately for painting bro. Like, how do you use watercolours without a swab? To be fair though, I know all the articulated action figures in your room are for anal insertion, so I guess you're accustomed to seeing ordinary household objects as sexual aides .

I hit it and I hit it good, douchelords! I'm out.

I can vouch for both the above opinions. Planetside 2 is awe inspiring.

I'm fairly certain the satisfaction of saying is worth braving physical violence for. I'm going to make it one of my things, like booze and misanthropy. Taking some ho bag to Kew Gardens tomorrow. She better put out. If she doesn't... Move bitch, get out the way!

That's about right actually. Amen.

I hope you at least muttered it under your breath while slapping the air in front of you with an open palm.

Move bitch, get out the way!