The Bard

For the sake of fuck. Well my budget this month requires me to choose between a PS3 and a record player. This is the kind of decision that pushes people to sucking dicks for a living.

I'm feeling a bit of PS3 envy at the moment, wanting to play Ni No Kuni, God of War 3 and Uncharted. I stuck with the 360 this generation largely because at the beginning it had the best online infrastructure, and I used to play online with friends a fuckton. There's also the fact that it pretty much was always a better bet for multiplatform titles and had a much more comfortable controller, with offset analogue sticks (which I super hope Sony consider for their rumoured controller revamp). 720 is probably a no go for me because of what is speculated about the system thus far - that a portion of it's processing power is going to be dedicated to some nebulous OS interface or function (that can only mean Kinect which I have zero interest in), its RAM is slow as fuck DDR3, GPU is a generation and several models below the mid tier 7870 I have in my PC at the moment, and the fact that I really don't want to have to pay £49.99 a year to get the most out of the console. Microsoft's line on exclusives completely dwindled towards the late end of the cycle, although from what I understand they have been doing a lot towards building new first party studios - likely for a better push on exclusives next generation. Part of the reason I want to go with the PS4 (even though the consoles look structurally very similar in that they both borrow even more from PC architecture than they did this generation) is the exclusives and the chance to play the games that I missed out on by not having a PS3 (that is, again, assuming that PS3 backwards compatibility isn't an issue).

The electric pings and hums peal with a frequency that strikes the tuning fork in my soul.

Fucking hell, just caught a video review of this. Looks like I'm going to have to buy a PS3.

This reminds me of the time in uni when the cleaner lady left a print out set of instructions on why we shouldn't leave the kitchen sink plugged with puke, and we just left the piece of paper corrected on the counter top with "F- please see me after class" written across the bottom. Asshole five!

Having a sense of the world being a platitudinous miasma of irony is important, otherwise we won't have much to talk about. Also bum. Actually just yesterday I was trying to find the Victoria line at Oxford Street station and got distracted by a particularly fine tush, completely forgot what I was doing, and ended up on the sidewalk bewildered by how I got there.

Hate for people doing things is such a common occurrence that I can't bind it to particular things. It's just become a continuous, all encompassing feeling of dire, baleful rage.

Hahaha. You're a bad man Moogle.

Just beat him. The only problem was figuring out that you can block his swipes but not his lunge, and getting past his first attack. I've got a pretty shitty shield though - knights shield if I remember correctly. Was pretty chuffed until I opened the door for the key he gives you and got fucking ruined by some fat butcher and rage quit. This is no game to play when your patience is being worn thin by caffeine withdrawal.

I can't remember crying at anything since the first time heard I Forger Her by Jeff Buckley (coincidentally after breaking up with my first girlfriend ). I'm not a crier really but I often get emotional over scenes in films or occasionally in games. For example the same scene Cube mentions in Mass Effect 3 was pretty upsetting but I didn't tear up. I actually think it might be some sort of physiological illness, like my tear ducts don't work or something.

You're my hero.

Oh for fucks sake. I play the game on and off so I tend to forget certain things while I'm having several weeks downtime, but I didn't even register that blocking would be a viable strategy against the fucking thing. In fact, I even have the wolf ring equipped which reduces flinching, so maybe I should try that instead. Also, it's been so long since I started the game that I can't remember what my build is. I'm level 36 though, and it says Covenant - Way of White under my character name, if that means anything to you. Edit: Blocking definitely isn't a viable strategy tbh

That shit definitely doesn't work. There's no room to maneuver for a start, so you're persistently trying and failing to evade the demon's ridiculously broad swipes. The only tactic that produced any results is to lure him to the top of the steps and lob firebombs at him.

I spent my early years applying my ingenuity to figuring the most efficient way to rip people off. This man is my spirit animal.

Well perhaps I just don't have the cojones for it. The fourth time I waltzed up to the Capra demon with a revised strategy and 30 firebombs, I still got my ass squarely handed to me. It is really difficult. But I suppose with enough patience and forethought you can get through it.

Definitely character building. I've been known to do some wild shit in my time, but I think your story pretty much takes the biscuit for maddest thing I've ever heard. I think the thing that makes it so bizarre is the lack of information on what actually happened between you being sat next to us and being caked in a belly batter, curled up next to some random dude.

Well this is a winning title if I ever saw one.

It's not like people who play the lottery understand maths anyway - for all they know the only difference is that they have to hand the distracted brown man who runs the local offie a slightly larger coin.

True. I think an alternate source of suspense and tension could work in the game though. In the films it was fear of the unseen/ unknown, but I think the tension in the game will come from the fact that each individual has finite resources (you can either hold a gun or a locator, for example) and the requirement for coordination between each character class to succeed and take down an opponents. The shitty thing is I really love the Dead Space series, but it seems as if the third one is taking a massive detour and scrubbing the game of its character.

Well, it's not the logistics I'm concerned about on that front. The fact is that their levels are ripped straight from sets used in the movies - angular design, narrow corridors and small rooms - which make sense from a filmic perspective, but I don't have that much confidence that it'll make for good level design. At the same time though, Gearbox have never made a bad game (DNF being exempt - it's not theirs).

Alternatively you could follow suit with every one else and not give a fuck about the quality of the Wii U port.

Presumably has something to with resources being allocated to the Brothers in Arms sequel and ongoing Borderlands 2 DLC.

@Shorty - That Donkey Kong tee is incredible. Want.

Hahahahaha

Premium provides you with all the DLC yeah, as well as the ones that are due to come out in future. I think there's only Endgame left to be released though.