Sheikah Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Maybe now, but I'm willing to bet if you got a girlfriend you'd think very differently.
Serebii Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Maybe now, but I'm willing to bet if you got a girlfriend you'd think very differently. How so? My parents don't care. My brother had his girlfriend sleep over most nights while he lived here (he claims to still but 70% of nights being away from here indicates he has moved out).
Sheikah Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Personal space, not being around family all the time/when you want to make noise (if you get my drift). The space to start a family and the right to do whatever the hell you want to do in your house, like renovating. Whatever you say, you do not have 100% independence and freedom when living with your folks, unless they live in an urn. At least for myself, I'd be pretty conscious of the fact my family were in the house if I was having private time with my girlfriend. Rent hasn't been cheap but I am grateful for the space and independence I have. That said, it's not for everyone, and staying with folks is a great way to save up for a deposit for your own place.
Happenstance Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Im sure a lot of people probably think they are perfectly happy with how things are at home but as soon as they move out they'll realise how wrong they were. Not that they are secretly unhappy but being independant completely different (...I assume )
Serebii Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Personal space, not being around family all the time/when you want to make noise (if you get my drift). The space to start a family and the right to do whatever the hell you want to do in your house, like renovating. Whatever you say, you do not have 100% independence and freedom when living with your folks, unless they live in an urn. At least for myself, I'd be pretty conscious of the fact my family were in the house if I was having private time with my girlfriend. Rent hasn't been cheap but I am grateful for the space and independence I have. That said, it's not for everyone, and staying with folks is a great way to save up for a deposit for your own place. Well I'm pretty sure that when I do want to start a family, I'll move out. I'd obviously not stay here, but I have complete and utter freedom.
Shorty Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 You have 100% independent freedom? So you can chill in the living room whenever you want with a dozen mates, no matter what's on TV or who your parents have round? You can paint the hall whatever colour you like? You can get a new extension out back, build a shed for your bikes? You can dig up the garden and grow veggies? You can have your car parked on the driveway all the time? You can sell the house and move somewhere else? You can get yourself a huge cinema surround sound system and have it on at full volume at 2 in the morning? You can bring a girl over and have sex in the kitchen at 2 in the afternoon? There are plenty of positives to living at home, I don't judge you in the slightest for it. I often think I'd love to save money and get meals made for me and always have family around. But you don't have 100% freedom and independence when you live in someone else's house, don't be silly....
Serebii Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 You have 100% independent freedom? So you can chill in the living room whenever you want with a dozen mates, no matter what's on TV or who your parents have round? You can paint the hall whatever colour you like? You can get a new extension out back, build a shed for your bikes? You can dig up the garden and grow veggies? You can have your car parked on the driveway all the time? You can sell the house and move somewhere else? You can get yourself a huge cinema surround sound system and have it on at full volume at 2 in the morning? You can bring a girl over and have sex in the kitchen at 2 in the afternoon? There are plenty of positives to living at home, I don't judge you in the slightest for it. I often think I'd love to save money and get meals made for me and always have family around. But you don't have 100% freedom and independence when you live in someone else's house, don't be silly.... Yes. Yes I do to all except the selling of the house, or the kitchen one but that's because that's not sanitary...that's where I prepare my food.
drahkon Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 because that's not sanitary...that's where I prepare my food. Unless you're doing both at the same time it's really not a big deal :p
Sheikah Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Yes. Yes I do to all except the selling of the house, or the kitchen one but that's because that's not sanitary...that's where I prepare my food. Your parents must be very lenient to let you build extensions to their house, evict them from rooms to have friends round in, play music loud at 2AM and paint their hall bright pink.
drahkon Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Kitchen sex is the 5th best place to have sex. You can't just say that without giving us the list.
Eddage Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 I'm not sure growing up is actually real. I've finally got my degree and a proper job and will (hopefully) own my own home before the end of the year, yet I still feel like I did when I was 18 (ten years ago). I still laugh at the same dick/your mum jokes and for the most part like the same films/tv/music. Regarding the whole living with parents issue... Serebii you're chatting shit I moved back in with the folks after uni and whilst they're great (cook me food, don't charge rent, for the most part give me space) I hate it. As others have said it is impossible to have 100% independence whilst living with your parents in their house. At the moment I'm just telling myself that it's better than giving my money to some random landlord and so if I suck it up for a few more months I can buy my own place.
Serebii Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Your parents must be very lenient to let you build extensions to their house, evict them from rooms to have friends round in, play music loud at 2AM and paint their hall bright pink. To be fair, many people who move out on their own don't have several of those bits due to either having a flat and so needing to consider neighbours or renting meaning they can't build extensions or redecorate.
Ramar Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 or the kitchen one but that's because that's not sanitary...that's where I prepare my food. Seriously.... Btw am I the only person who lives at home still pays a bit of rent. Not like going rate but some money none the less.
Sheikah Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 To be fair, many people who move out on their own don't have several of those bits due to either having a flat and so needing to consider neighbours or renting meaning they can't build extensions or redecorate. And yet, many also do. Still amazed at your parents' leniency at letting you do all that though, and your post not at all being BS to win arguments or nuthin'.
Shorty Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 Seriously.... Btw am I the only person who lives at home still pays a bit of rent. Not like going rate but some money none the less. Nah I know several who do. If I went home I bet my Mum would charge me rent! It's fairly reasonable unless maybe the house is paid off and you do your share of cleaning etc..
Ashley Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 I think even if the house is paid off its still right to pay toward bills. When I was a student I paid when I went back for summers.
The Bard Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 (edited) And this got me thinking; my fiends back home (he 6 months older than me, she 13) are either celebrating their daughter's 10th birthday this year or their 10th year of marriage (they got married the year after she was born). I forget which but damnnnn. Birth control often slips your mind when you're iced on crystal meth. Reading this thread; you guys are all unexpectedly sane. To me, the end goal I think is being independent and being self sufficient. Being able to "make it on your own" without the need to be attached to your parents and being able to do the things that make you happy whilst also fitting it in with work. At the moment, I'd say I'm pretty happy with that balance. I enjoy my job, but then I still get plenty of time to exercise and game, which is the stuff I enjoy doing. I do think people change and they "evolve" so to speak, but it's not necessarily a binary thing between being grown up and not grown up. There's lots of different levels in between. I guess some would find those milestones important, and to some extent they are. They show progress. To me, I see that progress in a different way. Moving out from home to go to uni was progress, getting my first teaching job was progress, moving in with Ine was progress, and so on. I definitely look back at how things were five years ago and think yeah, I've changed but in a better way and I'm doing things better than I was five years ago. So, I'm happy. I think what typically passes as adulthood is a combination of basic human goal oriented behaviour, pursuing biological or evolutionary-psychological imperatives (marriage as a strategic goal for reproduction, the inevitable children, a degree of wealth that puts you beyond subsistence and into a social arms race where you have to have a shinier aluminium can to traverse the grey concrete in, etc.) and assumption of a milquetoast persona that is incapable of 1. offending, 2. nothing but water cooler talk, and 3. as a corollary of 2, assumption of a set of socially acceptable political, moral and cultural standards that allow you to make easy conversational proclamations on their basis. None of your geek asses are ever going to grow up btw, you're typing all this below a banner of a cartoon plumber whose only verbal skill is saying his own name in various inflections, fist pumping next to a yellow turtle-dinosaur in goth regalia. Personal space, not being around family all the time/when you want to make noise (if you get my drift). The space to start a family and the right to do whatever the hell you want to do in your house, like renovating. Whatever you say, you do not have 100% independence and freedom when living with your folks, unless they live in an urn. I liked that. Edited April 27, 2015 by The Bard Automerged Doublepost
MoogleViper Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 To be fair, many people who move out on their own don't have several of those bits due to either having a flat and so needing to consider neighbours or renting meaning they can't build extensions or redecorate. But there's still a lot of freedom and independence when you move out. Nobody's saying that you're still being treated like a child and can't do your own things. But to say that you have the same level of freedom and independence as moving out is quite frankly ridiculous. As well as the palpable examples that Sheikah and Shorty already put forward there's also a more psychological element to moving out. I can't really describe it, but there's definitely a "sense of independence" that comes with moving out. Part of it is tied to responsibility; when you're the one that has to sort out all of the bills, maintenance, upkeep etc. But with that comes a change in your mindset. You feel more free and you percieve yourself and your life differently, and I think that leads to feeling more "grown up". As Shorty said, we're not judging you for living with your parents. There are plenty of benefits to living at home, namely money (if I'd have been living at home for the last 2 years I'd have saved ~£15000 on rent and bills). But to say that you have the same level of freedom and independence is just nonsense.
Goafer Posted April 27, 2015 Author Posted April 27, 2015 We would never have been able to save up for a deposit as quickly if we hadn't been staying with my parents. It's not been too bad, but I really can't wait for the sweet release of freedom.
Ashley Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 You can't just say that without giving us the list. White House Lift Beach Catamaran Kitchen Happy? Anyway yeah I find there's a noticeable sense of freedom that comes with moving out of the family home. I'm not the same person I normally am when I'm at home. It's difficult to be you in the presence of people that (unconsciously) treat you like someone you used to be. Unless you are still the same as you were younger. I don't know. I change every few years. Like a BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLY.
Oxigen_Waste Posted April 27, 2015 Posted April 27, 2015 because that's not sanitary...that's where I prepare my food. You either need help, or a part on The Big Bang Theory. I'm not sure growing up is actually real. It isn't. Modern society is built on lies and deceit. To be fair, many people who move out on their own don't have several of those bits due to either having a flat and so needing to consider neighbours or renting meaning they can't build extensions or redecorate. I'm renting a flat in London, we're as noisy as we want (as is everyone else, there's always the occasional party happening somewhere in the building), we completely redecorated the flat and we even built a little shed in the the balcony/rooftop to house the grill and some other stuff. You seem to have a very naive view of how the world works if you think people only do what they're supposed to.
Blade Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 I moved out at 18 when I went to Cardiff uni. Never went back to my parents after uni and couldn't think of moving back in. I love my independance too much and although I could do what I want it would always remain the fact that it is their home and not mine. In terms of growing up, I rent my own place, got a career, got a girlfriend. Sounds all pretty grown up to me.
Zechs Merquise Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 I can't believe how quickly this descended into bashing @Serebii just because he lives at home and has a relaxed relationship with his parents and feels he gets to do as he wishes! The way some people act on here is as if they live on luxury yachts moored off the coast of Monaco and are surrounded by Playboy bunnies all day as they drink champagne and work on their tan! I moved out when I was 18, but I know plenty of people who live at home and it works for some and doesn't work for others.
Sheikah Posted April 28, 2015 Posted April 28, 2015 I can't believe how quickly this descended into bashing @Serebii just because he lives at home and has a relaxed relationship with his parents and feels he gets to do as he wishes! The way some people act on here is as if they live on luxury yachts moored off the coast of Monaco and are surrounded by Playboy bunnies all day as they drink champagne and work on their tan! I moved out when I was 18, but I know plenty of people who live at home and it works for some and doesn't work for others. It hasn't at all descended into that and trust you to make an argument out of something where there isn't one. Nobody is judging Serebii for living at home. What people are arguing is that you don't have the same level of independence and freedoms as when you have your own place. If he didn't argue against what is pretty clearly true then none of this would have happened.
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