Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Harry stared dumbfoundedly at his best female friend and his best male friend's younger sister. The terms "Bludgers" and "Golden Snitch" had never been so clear to him as now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReZourceman Posted December 7, 2008 Author Share Posted December 7, 2008 "Expelliarmus!" yelled Harry, from underneath the bed covers. "Expelliarmus!" The sound echoed throughout the whole room, Harry shaking and a bead of sweat falling from his face. "Expelliarmus!" "For fucks sake Harry, we've told you before, If you're going to experiment like that then leave it in the privacy of your own company." Snapped Ron. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoogleViper Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Got this off of that website with internet quote's that I can't remember the name of. I think it begins with a Q. <JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book <JonJonB> Let's see the results... <JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry. <JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything <JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to. <JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work." <JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. " <JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls <JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!" <JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils. <JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue. <JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them. <JonJonB> Ok <JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof <JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all <JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he? <melusine > O_______O <JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang <JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip. <JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellmeister Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Thats on bash.org Perhaps the funniest website ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoogleViper Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Thats on bash.org Perhaps the funniest website ever. That's the one. Don't know why I thought it began with a q. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 That's the one. Don't know why I thought it began with a q. Obviously, you read it upside down from right to left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoogleViper Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 "Erm, excuse me professor, I, erm, was wondering if there was, erm, a spell to undress girls?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roostophe Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 "Now I know why you're so eager to learn the engorgement charm." laughed Ron, as he stared at Neville's manhood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonnas Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 That's the one. Don't know why I thought it began with a q. QDB, right? It's what you see every time you open the site. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoogleViper Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Hermione - "Professor I've been violated! Ron used the penetratio spell on me." QDB, right? It's what you see every time you open the site. Maybe. I haven't been on it for years though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Molly Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 BANG! And the dirt is gone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris the great Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 "DATEUSRAPEUS!" cried harry, his eagerness to explore ginnys chamber of secrets obvious to every one in the great hall. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Can I go again? At age 87, Harry thought back to all his adventures at Hogwart ... the first time he held his wand ... when he pulled Gryffindor's Sword ... exploring the Chamber of Secrets ... And then Harry suddenly realised how much innuendo had gone right over his head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beast Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Can I go again? Anyone can have a go as many times as they like. All of these entries are hilarious, keep 'em coming, lol. I'll pick a winner in 2 days Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted December 7, 2008 Share Posted December 7, 2008 Anyone can have a go as many times as they like. "That's what Hermione said," said Ron Ba-dum-tsch! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris the great Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 dumbledore met harrys look with a sly smile and a wink of his saphire eye. "i'm a bummer you know!" whispered dumbledore, them walked of with a merry whistle and slight limp. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gaggle64 Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 'To find what happens next, please insert £2 to unlock the rest of this book." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The fish Posted December 8, 2008 Share Posted December 8, 2008 "From then on, Harry vowed he would never use any made-up words ever again." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beast Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 At age 87, Harry thought back to all his adventures at Hogwart ... the first time he held his wand ... when he pulled Gryffindor's Sword ... exploring the Chamber of Secrets ... And then Harry suddenly realised how much innuendo had gone right over his head. I thought this one was very funny but I think ReZ wins it with... "Expelliarmus!" yelled Harry, from underneath the bed covers. "Expelliarmus!" The sound echoed throughout the whole room, Harry shaking and a bead of sweat falling from his face. "Expelliarmus!" "For fucks sake Harry, we've told you before, If you're going to experiment like that then leave it in the privacy of your own company." Snapped Ron. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReZourceman Posted December 9, 2008 Author Share Posted December 9, 2008 Lulz, thanks. Lets see. If this is the answer what is the question. A young boy. Heh heh heh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jonnas Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 "What kind of comedic device will a bored man use to attract pedophile jokes?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spenno182 Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 Lulz, thanks. Lets see. If this is the answer what is the question. A young boy. Heh heh heh. ReZourceman's Penis strongly resembles one belonging to what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellmeister Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 What does every peadophile hope to find under their christmas tree? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roostophe Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 "If it was 1997, what would I be?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris the great Posted December 11, 2008 Share Posted December 11, 2008 what is the exact oposite of an old woman? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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