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Posted

Post any examples you can think of where logic completely goes out of the window in videogames. Try not to be game specific, try and think of something that appears in a lot of games.

 

I'll get us started:

 

The more you beat up on a boss character, the stronger they become, often moving faster and using much stronger attacks.

 

In return for you saving their lives, NPC's constantly send you on fetch quests which surely would waste more time and hasten their impending doom.

 

Any more?

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Posted

STEALING THIS FROM SHORTY: But basically, throughout, say, metroid 3... Why have they left power-ups for you all over their dead planet? Why are all the locals so hell-bent on killing you? Why have they locked all their doors from the outside?

 

maybe I'll be able to add some of my own tomorrow...

Posted

This is the most important battle of your life, the future of the world depends on it, if you can't do this we will forever be under brutal nazi/soviet rule and suffer for decades.

 

Let's see if you can beat them with only 12000 credits.

Posted

ooh - guards who see you, chase you for a minute, then a timer runs down and they say "aah must've been nothing" and go back to their posts. Nubs.

 

Or when you're sniping and you miss the guy, then he turns and immediately runs towards you and starts shooting you.

Posted

Why can't I climb over that pile of rubble? It's 2 feet tall. Oh and wow...slaying that pack of rats just got me 2000 gil and a tent. Intriguing. Hold on a sec, a landmine just blew the best part of my face off, I'm gonna need to munch on this here ration.

Posted

HEALTH PACKS HEAL EVERYTHING. I can carry UNLIMITED WEAPONS and ammo. I somehow run faster with a knife. I can jump twice my height! I NEVER EVER, NO MATTER WHAT GAME IT IS, NEED TO PEE.

Posted

Good idea for a thread.

 

Well the obvious ones are the basic lack of sustance and rest. Heroes go te whole journey without eating or sleeping. But the most fascinating one is the complete irresponsiblity of parent in videogames, mostly RPGs and and adventure games. I always see the conversation going like this.

 

 

Random person: Hey Bill

 

Father of hero: Hey Tom

 

Random person: How it going

 

Father of hero: Good good, yourself?

 

Random person: Oh yeah fine. Hey I haven't seen your boy Mark around here recently? What's he up to?

 

Father of hero: Oh you didn't hear, he's off on a quest to defeat the ancient evil threatening life as we know it.

 

Random person: How cute. That sounds like the Mark I know haha. I must say though, you must be a little worried though musn't you?

 

Father of Hero: Oh no, I gave him a quick ten minute swordfighting tutroial before he left. Oh and he's on his journey with a great mercenary who said he would take care of him.

 

RP: Really a mercenary? So you know this guy?

 

FoH: Oh no, but he told me himself he would look after him. He said they would have lots of fun.

 

Rp: That lucky boy, to have an adventure like that at his age. How old is he now?

 

FoH: He turned 8 last month.

 

RP: Eight wow, they do grow up fast. So you didn't fancy going with him.

 

FoH: Are you mad? There'd be no one here to look after my Petunias.

 

 

Or something like that.

Posted

Why do you always start out fighting mice and bats? :(

Posted

The cleptomania rule. You can rob the people's houses right in front of them. Plus, they always leave their doors unlocked.

 

Also, the convenient rule that the monsters get stronger as you explore the world. How come the strong monsters don't appear near your village?

Except if there's a cave/dungeon that was locked/hidden during big part of the game. By the time you find it, the monsters inside will be many times stronger than the ones in the forest nearby that you explored in the beginning...)

Posted

Even though the dark lord´s army is at they're footsteps and ready to destroy and enslave your generic town, the shop keepers still insist on you paying for the sword of awesomeness that could really help you when your supposed to stop them

Posted

Almost all barrels explode, regardless of what may or may not be in them. Furthermore, enemies just love to gather round the ones that do.

 

Also crates. You always end up pushing massive crates around the place, which are invariably everywhere - even in peoples houses, up mountains, trees and sometimes just out in the middle of nowhere. Why crates? How many crates do you ever push in real life? What did crates ever do to you to deserve this?

Posted
In fighting games, that last punch to the enemy's foot (or other non letheal places) killed him.

 

Yet, they can get up instantly after their legs were broken in gruesome ways.

Of course, if you didn't break their legs hard enough, you can just poke'em in the toes, just to make sure they broke.

Posted

Random scientist dude: Hey man, I just need to get down to lab. I was working on that world destroying genetic virus and forgot my glasses case. Here's my ID.

 

Security guard: Alright that all seems in order. Hang on I just need to go and get that golden arrow head from the corridor upstairs and head down to the crypt to get a key. Actually while I'm at it could you go to the dog kennels and get that key from one of the dogs collars. Hmmm, you might need to gather those death masks, as well as the hidden gems..... and light the various coloured lanterns........ and rotate the statue.... and drain the pool.

 

Random scientist dude: Well..... ummmm, don't you just have a key card or something that'll just open the door.

 

Security guard: Pffft, that's hardly secure is it.

Posted
Random scientist dude: Hey man, I just need to get down to lab. I was working on that world destroying genetic virus and forgot my glasses case. Here's my ID.

 

Security guard: Alright that all seems in order. Hang on I just need to go and get that golden arrow head from the corridor upstairs and head down to the crypt to get a key. Actually while I'm at it could you go to the dog kennels and get that key from one of the dogs collars. Hmmm, you might need to gather those death masks, as well as the hidden gems..... and light the various coloured lanterns........ and rotate the statue.... and drain the pool.

 

Random scientist dude: Well..... ummmm, don't you just have a key card or something that'll just open the door.

 

Security guard: Pffft, that's hardly secure is it.

 

Mcoy knows you'd have a hard time if you came to his mansion, Mcoy has about a 1000 secret entrances that require a stupid tool, the only good thing is that there is alot more sex involved.

Posted

No matter how many warzones you fight in, there are never ever any civilians around. Either that or the entire population happened to be employed by the army. Including their pets and children.

Posted

Shoot someone in the foot five times and they will die. Possibly this is due to a fragment of bone breaking free, entering the bloodsteam, reaching the brain causing swelling, hemorrhaging and eventually massive strokes. This all happens in matter of seconds though.


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