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The Bard

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Everything posted by The Bard

  1. The Bard
    It is indeed much sex. Kudos.
  2. The Bard
    Snoozefest.
  3. The Bard
    My mates are obliged to hit me everytime I say "c.unt." (stupid fucking piece of shit word blocker) I'm covered in bruises. It's uncool, I mean, it's the word that comes to mind the most when Hollyoaks is on.
  4. The Bard
    ^ Is this because of the same guy as before?
  5. The Bard
    I'm sure you can forgiv....wait...let me take that from another angle; Only pricks with an epic lack of sense put any stock in the kind of tabloid reviews you're talking about, and even more in the idea that Britney actually constitutes to music. It isn't; there is no reason for it to exist, it's just another extrinsic filler you use to paper over the cracks in your underdeveloped musical understanding. Yeah, that sounds condescending, but I don't give a shit. Christ, the lot of you are pusillanimous to the point of making me actually think that gulags could serve a worthwhile purpose.
  6. The Bard
    ...And Jesus Wept. I pray this be the last time I witness someone actually confess to putting effort into something as trite as a Britney Spears album. This simple fact that you not only bought the album, but that you're unashamedly trying to extract some gratification from such excrement, makes me worried. I though it required more intelligence than you've exhibited to operate a keyboard. It's a conundrum. Now slap yourself hard in the face and then leave. You're done here. No, my friend, it doesn't count just because people can't see you throw a fit and bellow obscenities at the monitor. The urge is undeniable.
  7. The Bard
    Nice ab.
  8. The Bard
    Well, my mum makes absolutely fucking amazing curry of all kinds, none of this British, pussified, curry sauce bollocks.
  9. The Bard
    We explored it pretty thoroughly, mainly whether it's possible to get a hard on when you're asleep.
  10. The Bard
    Spent the day discussing the feasibility of man-rape, whether it's possible, believable, and whether the "victim" would actually give a shit. Man, women have it easy, they can have all the sex they want and not have to worry about getting anyone pregnant.
  11. The Bard
    Easy Lover by Phil Collins and Phil Bailey wins the award for the most cheesy song ever written. No shit; it puts Manowar and Dragonforce to shame.
  12. The Bard
    Me no understand o_0, new years is all about the booze cruise Edit:...oh cock, I can't read.
  13. The Bard
    Yeah, that's a good point, It's just hard not to whine when 3rd Strike was so perfect. I have nothing but faith in Capcom, they are my favourite development studio of all time, and SF:IV is going to be jaw dropping without a doubt, but that said, it's still hard to let go of the amazing parrying system, and the 2D sprites. I don't care much for the new graphical style at all, and I don't see why it can't look more like Viewtiful Joe and less like Blue Dragon. I know I'm being stupid; it's the very first screen shot of a game that's been in development for 3 months or so.
  14. The Bard
    Do I detect sarcasm? :p. Anyway, I have nothing but time to kill, so I think I might go watch Fellowship tomorrow, see if it's better than I remember.
  15. The Bard
    Yeah, I don't pass judgement on things I have no experience of, and I stand by everything I said earlier.
  16. The Bard
    Favourite Christmas songs? Biblebasher, Blame it on God, Crucified for thy inno..... I mean...I quite like Silent Night actually, cause there's this carol service that my mates do every year, and they're really quite fantastic. It's like a cliche, but I still love hearing it.
  17. The Bard
    Either way, it's still Lord of The Rings. Just substitute 1500 pages for 11 hours, and the soporific effect remains intact. Besides, that quote might have been in the book too
  18. The Bard
    The great irony of that quote is the fact that the Lord of The Rings actually achieves none of this...it's just a fairytale, except it's 1500 pages and way too laborious.
  19. The Bard
    But, they're really badly written. It's like, 80 pages of Sam and Frodo, doing sweet fuck all, and when you've forgotten where the other characters are and what they're doing, it shifts back to them for another 80 pages. It's so unbelievably disjointed, and it just doesn't flow as a story. Tolkien was a linguist, not a novelist, and it shows plain as day. He didn't write the books because he had something to say, he wrote them because he was incredibly vain, he purposely used ridiculously arcane language just to give a false sense of grandeur. That's just my opinion though, I suppose if you're willing to trudge through the books, they might be entertaining when you turn a blind eye to all of their shortcomings. I don't think anyone can argue that they're any sort of technical achievement so far as novels go.
  20. The Bard
    I hate Lord of The Rings. It's just one massive cliche, the books are 1500 pages of pointless, self indulgent excrement. That said, some parts of the films are pretty entertaining, and I quite like them, even though that idiot Jackson doesn't understand the concept of editing.
  21. The Bard
    I'm going to be scoping for chicks masochistic enough to have sex with me, if 'my coy mistress' at the moment can't hack it, and meeting up with all my mates who should be back in Manchester from uni, and it'll be the first time I've seen any of them in many months, so that should be fan-fucking-tastic, inebriated fun. My best Christmas eve ever was just lying in bed with my then gf, and watching old episodes of Friends (which I actually hate), but it was so comfortable, exactly how a Christmas eve should be.
  22. The Bard
    1. Various Genitalia 2. Either; A flying bird, or a bat with a really stupid cape. 3. Magus' Castle, but upside down.
  23. The Bard
    Corruption for sure, my game of 2007. Have you played Bioshock though?
  24. The Bard
    Yeah. It looks like a budget game. Like Sneak King. Only, it's street fighter and you can't get it for 2.50 at a burger joint.
  25. The Bard
    Russel Brand is a masturbatory, worthless **** who should be liquidated in whale semen. Funny people: Eddie Murphy Bill Hicks Dr Cox Me. That is all. I said C UNT you fucking whooooore!!
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