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Love? Relationships? Boy girl stuff? Complaints and appraisals! Gifs be welcome.


Kurtle Squad

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Yeah, its really nice when a girl messages you. I dont know about OkCupid but on POF girls have a special button to 'show interest'. Basically a button that notifies the guy to get off his arse and send them a message if they like them. Not fair really, but it's a good way of knowing who might think you're cute with little effort on their behalf.

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Yeah, its really nice when a girl messages you. I dont know about OkCupid but on POF girls have a special button to 'show interest'. Basically a button that notifies the guy to get off his arse and send them a message if they like them. Not fair really, but it's a good way of knowing who might think you're cute with little effort on their behalf.

 

Is it only girls who have that button?

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Anyway, online dating just feels a bit weird to me. I don't like the fact that you're dealing with just a virtual representation of someone...

 

I disagree, look at Facebook...our online presence and communication is getting quite representative of our "real" lives and personalities. Of course you can craft a profile to represent yourself in a certain way, but you can do that in real life anyway! There's hope :p

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Another issue are those using fake pictures. Saw one girl on Zoosk's whose profile picture was Olivia Wilde lol

 

Not sure why people would use fake pictures, they'd just get found out in the end. Might as well be yourself from the beginning.

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I like it when girls message, but I try to message too.

 

My problem is that it tells the person if you visit their profile so I'm very aprehensive to do it unless I really wish to chat to them, as I don't want them to think bad things

 

Yeah it makes it a bit awkward when you just want to check out their profile, then they message you and you don't want to talk to them. You can make yourself anonymous on OkCupid but it means you can't see when people view your profile either so it depends on whether you care about views or not.
Does the message info tell you the profile basics, like age and location?... if so you could look them up easy enough without logging on first.
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I disagree, look at Facebook...our online presence and communication is getting quite representative of our "real" lives and personalities. Of course you can craft a profile to represent yourself in a certain way, but you can do that in real life anyway! There's hope :p

 

Yep, but the difference with fb is that you've met these people in real life first! You already know what they look like, what they sound like etc, i.e. is there a basis for attraction or not. Plus, IRL you can get a lot of additional information via body language, tone, facial expressions etc. Pure online just feels weird, at least via dating sites o_O It's like going to an online shop, "how many pounds of meat do you want?"

 

Another issue are those using fake pictures. Saw one girl on Zoosk's whose profile picture was Olivia Wilde lol

 

The reason I won't touch paid sites. They're getting you to pay for their service, so why wouldn't they pad up the roster so to speak? Slimy scumbags...

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Does the message info tell you the profile basics, like age and location?... if so you could look them up easy enough without logging on first.

 

No, it tells you their username and how good a match you are. If there's a search option you could just put in the username and see if that works.

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Yep, but the difference with fb is that you've met these people in real life first! You already know what they look like, what they sound like etc, i.e. is there a basis for attraction or not. Plus, IRL you can get a lot of additional information via body language, tone, facial expressions etc. Pure online just feels weird, at least via dating sites o_O It's like going to an online shop, "how many pounds of meat do you want?"

 

You make it sounds like the whole relationship will be online. You'll still meet these people. You'll still go on dates and get to know them in person. You're not going to share a few emails and then tie the knot. It's just a way of meeting people.

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Oh, and I almost asked a girl out last night. We get on the same bus sometimes, so I pretty much decided by the end of the journey that I was actually going to do it. Then when we stepped off the bus she lit up a cigarette.

 

So I'm no longer attracted to her.

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Oh, and I almost asked a girl out last night. We get on the same bus sometimes, so I pretty much decided by the end of the journey that I was actually going to do it. Then when we stepped off the bus she lit up a cigarette.

 

So I'm no longer attracted to her.

That's what electroshock therapy is for

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You make it sounds like the whole relationship will be online. You'll still meet these people. You'll still go on dates and get to know them in person. You're not going to share a few emails and then tie the knot. It's just a way of meeting people.

 

Of course not. It's just that for some reason I find the whole concept rather unnatural and synthetic... o_O

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Of course not. It's just that for some reason I find the whole concept rather unnatural and synthetic... o_O

I agree, but I'm out of options. My friends have all paired up and so going out isn't that common I'm self employed so the only thing I have daily contact with is my goldfish. As such, I had to go with this

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Yeah, I'm not really getting a real feel for these people (hurr), and conversation is a little stilted, whereas in real life I'm sure I can do a better job, and I'm definitely more charismatic than the restrictions of the online process give me credit for. However, I don't actually have the balls to ask the girl I want to out on a date in the physical world, so I'm deferring gratification, for the sake of awkward online slizz. On the positive side, I can make my online persona seem way more physically attractive by way of culling the photos in which I look super sexy, and omitting the ones where I look like a total grunion.

 

The one girl from San Fran is massively into Phoenix Wright and I just sent her a video of me playing the Search ~ Core theme from the second game. I think that might have been a bit weird/ overboard, but what the hell, you only get so many chances to show off :heh:.

 

Keep in mind that Bard won the Most Attractive Male award on N-E, so it's no wonder that girls are flocking to him.

 

Yeah, my N-E trophy brings all the girls to the yard :heh:

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RE: Meeting new people, going out with people, whether online or in real-life - one of the few things that is so much easier if you're gay. There's just so much less beating around the bush.

 

I mean, most young gays in the UK are now of the grindr generation, it seems to be completely socially acceptable to be scanning for someone to have sex with down the road while talking with some other people at the same time. Not to say whether that's a pleasant fact or not. Kinda rude just in terms of ignoring other people or making people aware where your mind actually is...but I'm such a non-prude - I of course think it's really interesting/cool that there is no stigma attached to things like grindr (generally).

 

It was never really for me though. I wasn't ever driven by out-of-the-blue random sex enough/didn't have a smartphone lol. And If I wanted a one-night stand, I prefer the "Go to a club, dance, meet someone" way, since there's fun involved beforehand.

 

Blaaaaaah

 

[but then I think there has always been more of a precedent of such things in the gay community/more acceptance of hook-ups or online dating just cause of how gay people have had to meet one another throughout time - often secretive, without strings etc. Just an extension of that.]

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Yep, but the difference with fb is that you've met these people in real life first! You already know what they look like, what they sound like etc, i.e. is there a basis for attraction or not. Plus, IRL you can get a lot of additional information via body language, tone, facial expressions etc. Pure online just feels weird, at least via dating sites o_O It's like going to an online shop, "how many pounds of meat do you want?"

 

My point is that Facebook is a lot more personalised than say, Myspace, and thus it's somewhat of an accurate representation of a person! Of course every individual quirk and mannerism can't be portrayed online, but that leaves something to the imagination! It's the same in real life tbh, you could get a false impression by meeting someone - they could've acted or spoken differently than they usually do, etc. Not pushing online dating or anything, just my thoughts! :)

 

And yes I would...online shopping :p Though yeah, it's a bit dodgy buying fruit, veg, and meat with the supermarket delivery services.

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I agree, but I'm out of options. My friends have all paired up and so going out isn't that common I'm self employed so the only thing I have daily contact with is my goldfish. As such, I had to go with this

 

Nah, I'm glad you're trying it out. I don't go out much myself, and I think bars are just dreadful places to be in, so it's good that there are other options out there.

 

My point is that Facebook is a lot more personalised than say, Myspace, and thus it's somewhat of an accurate representation of a person! Of course every individual quirk and mannerism can't be portrayed online, but that leaves something to the imagination! It's the same in real life tbh, you could get a false impression by meeting someone - they could've acted or spoken differently than they usually do, etc. Not pushing online dating or anything, just my thoughts! :)

 

No, I think facebook is great, because it's a natural virtual habitat. Just like a blog, a forum, youtube, twitter etc; people being more or less themselves. As opposed to dating sites, where you're putting on a clear facade, i.e. trying to market yourself with a written description and a picture o_O Not saying people aren't marketing themselves in other places and all the time, but at least that's not their sole purpose...

 

And yes, I think online dating sites have their merits, why not. Just pointing out that there's a certain factor of weirdness to them as well... o_O

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I don't think that putting up a facade in the virtual world is much different to the way many people put up a facade when dating in real life. It's a different situation to your "natural" virtual habitats, so inevitably it's going to incur different pressures. What you're trying to say is that on dating sites, there's more of an opportunity for concealment ability to mislead than in the physical world right?

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