Mr_Odwin Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 I think it's not a good thing. It's not just her issue as I think we should all be good members of society that don't sleep with each others lads and lasses.
Colin Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 I think it's not a good thing. It's not just her issue as I think we should all be good members of society that don't sleep with each others lads and lasses. I have to agree. It is morally wrong, and nothing anyone should be proud of.........in someways I feel ashamed that I've stooped to such a low level, but this is about you Platty, not me.
|Laguna| Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 I'd say it's bad if you started the whole thing, but if she came to you, then why not... well probably becasue she's unhappy in her relationship and needed some attention or just wanted something new sparky twitching with excitement in her instead of the same old same old.
Johelian Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 (edited) I think its the Wrong thing to do; youre technically screwing over someone by sleeping with their girlfriend, however you try to justify it. Would you kick some random guy in the balls if you saw him on the street? Thats really what you are doing to this guy, whereever he is. Whatever she says to you, its up to her to sort things out - and for you not to get involved. Having said that, I understand how easy it would be for you guys (and girls) to convince yourselves its ok; but its rising above that temptation that really makes us better people. Probably. ________ Acura Tl Edited February 16, 2011 by Johelian
Raining_again Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 Just hope to god teh bf doesn't come after you! The girl shuda said no, or not let herself get so drunk she'd do that (if that was the case) dont stress yourself over it
Gaijin von Snikbah Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 You could turn it around, and ask what you would think of a person having sex with your girl friend. There in lies the answer.
Nevahom Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 To me it Depends really: If you knew that she had a boyfriend and let the situation happen not caring what the consequences mabye, then to me that is a questionable act to me that would warrant the boyfriend being destroyed emotionally if or when he finds out and if you find yourself waking up in intensive care then you know why. BUT, if she tells you that she has a boyfriend the morning after or doesnt really mention it, then you have the "moral high ground" Either way i dont believe that anyone who has a partner that finds it too hard to stay out of other peoples beds arent worth the time or the effort, you are right in saying that she is the one who has to answer, but personally i hope he just tells her to sling her hook and let him get on with his life. Ive been in the boyfriends situation before and when i caught her getting off with him in the toilets, i was honestly capable of murder that night. just be prepared, thats all you can do really. what does she think of it all?
Arragaun Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 dont stress yourself over it My thoughts exactly. It's all part of life isn't it.
Raining_again Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 someone thats right for you WONT CHEAT. sure i wouldnt be that damn happy if someone cheated on me, but these things happen.
Johelian Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 (edited) someone thats right for you WONT CHEAT. sure i wouldnt be that damn happy if someone cheated on me, but these things happen. But surely the boyfriend deserves a little better than that? You dont have to compound the problem by putting yourself into the equation. ________ Silversurfer reviews Edited February 16, 2011 by Johelian
Nevahom Posted December 14, 2005 Posted December 14, 2005 I think everyones agreed that he's gonna be a bit pissed if he finds out
Platty Posted December 15, 2005 Author Posted December 15, 2005 Ok so a little more detail perhaps is needed.... Ive known her for about 5 years, we have always been good friends and pretty close..She has been with her Boyfriend for about 2 months now, ive met him a couple of times, he seems ok but not really her type. It was her birthday friday and we went out saturday to have a good ol' drink up and boogie...to cut a long story short we ended up kissing (which we have done many times before throughout our 5 years of knowingness) then later she asked if she could stay at my house... How could i say no to my good friend who has stayed at mine many times before ?eh? anyway one thing led to another when we got home and we had the sex... I feel bad cos she has a boyfriend and i would hate to be in his shoes but then again on the other hand i dont feel guilty at all and neither does she cos as she says, ive known you forever (well 5 years) and you mean more to me than him (the boyfriend), bah i dunno, ill just get on with it i guess, all part of being young and gaining experience from these kinda things. Thanks for all your advice and kind words.
Aimless Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 [Platty's most recent post.] That puts an entirely different spin on it, I think. Which just goes to show that it's never as simple as 'bad' and 'not so bad'. As such, I couldn't possibly comment on your actions without having lived your life — this is a question for your own morality, no one else's. Taking the original scenario as hypothetical, though, I'd say it's kind of like buying pirate DVDs*: you may not be doing the most 'wrong', but without you it wouldn't happen. *Ignore the connotations of my comparing your friend to a cheap piece of plastic. It's purely for an illustrative purpose, I assure you.
Wesley Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 Unless he didn;t know that she was your ex. Then it's just an honest mistake. No as in, I was going out with my ex when he asked her out.
EEVILMURRAY Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 Ok so a little more detail perhaps is needed.... Ive known her for about 5 years, we have always been good friends and pretty close..She has been with her Boyfriend for about 2 months now, ive met him a couple of times, he seems ok but not really her type. It was her birthday friday and we went out saturday to have a good ol' drink up and boogie...to cut a long story short we ended up kissing (which we have done many times before throughout our 5 years of knowingness) then later she asked if she could stay at my house... How could i say no to my good friend who has stayed at mine many times before ?eh? anyway one thing led to another when we got home and we had the sex... I feel bad cos she has a boyfriend and i would hate to be in his shoes but then again on the other hand i dont feel guilty at all and neither does she cos as she says, ive known you forever (well 5 years) and you mean more to me than him (the boyfriend), bah i dunno, ill just get on with it i guess, all part of being young and gaining experience from these kinda things. Thanks for all your advice and kind words. Sounds like one of those things you get in Dear Deidre, except for one thing, it was just "had the sex". It's always "It was the best" "Phenomonal" "Out of this world" etc. These people must not get much. Either way. I'm down with your funky shizzle. However! Don't make a habit of it. Shabba.
jayseven Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 My view on these matters is fairly simple. It doesn't matter about teh situation, or teh consequences, the act itself is morally wrong. Sure, she's wrong too, but she wouldn't have been if you had resisted. It's because of you that she wronged. If her relationship is not right for her then who are you to do something about it? As a friend you should be confiding in her, sharing your opinions, not fucking her brains out. That's my stringent view. But i'm quite narrow-minded when it comes to things like this, really. Ever asked yourself 'would I fuck her (or him, or course) if I know I could get away with it guarenteed?' I think it's a bigger person who comes out of that question and says 'No'. But hey -- My views mean I think the same thing regardless of teh severity of teh actions. Truth be told, I don't care what you do. Just don't feel too upset if anything goes wrong in the future, or if the same thing happens to you one day.
dukkadukka Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 i'll admit i've done worse, but i just think that you knew of this boyfriend's existence, and although you don't know him personally you betrayed him as a human being. i've done some pretty nasty stuff myself, but i've learnt to empathise now and i'm above doing stuff like that. you are just as much to blame as she is.
arab_freak Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 If you slept with her and you knew she had a boyfriend, then you both deserve equal blame.
Johelian Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 (edited) My view on these matters is fairly simple. It doesn't matter about teh situation, or teh consequences, the act itself is morally wrong. Sure, she's wrong too, but she wouldn't have been if you had resisted. It's because of you that she wronged. If her relationship is not right for her then who are you to do something about it? As a friend you should be confiding in her, sharing your opinions, not fucking her brains out. That's my stringent view. But i'm quite narrow-minded when it comes to things like this, really. Ever asked yourself 'would I fuck her (or him, or course) if I know I could get away with it guarenteed?' I think it's a bigger person who comes out of that question and says 'No'. But hey -- My views mean I think the same thing regardless of teh severity of teh actions. Truth be told, I don't care what you do. Just don't feel too upset if anything goes wrong in the future, or if the same thing happens to you one day. Good man. I too have a very firm view on this, and its nice to see people agreeing rather than calling you uptight or whatever. ________ Vtr1000F Edited February 16, 2011 by Johelian
Pit-Jr Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 on the bright side, you can take solace in the fact that dozens...of thousands....of people are being cheated on right this very moment. Its the 'in' thing to do these days!
Johelian Posted December 15, 2005 Posted December 15, 2005 (edited) When you put it that way...... ________ Buy vaporizers Edited February 16, 2011 by Johelian
Platty Posted December 15, 2005 Author Posted December 15, 2005 Just don't feel too upset if anything goes wrong in the future, or if the same thing happens to you one day. It has happened to me before, so i do know what it feels like to be the boyfriend who has been cheated on and its crap. But for some reason being the other side of it i just dont feel guilty at all even tho i know that i should be oh well life goes on and most importantly we are still good friends and nothing is strange or awkward between us both. Thank you for all your comments and view on this, I much appreciate the mature responses.
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