Posted October 16, 2013 One of my go-to "I've got a spare five minutes, entertain me, internet!" websites is notalwaysright.com, where retail slaves post their funny stories of (usually) stupid customers doing hilarious things. I know lots of us here are retail slaves - let's share our ridiculous stories!! I added to the site recently: (at a video game shop) A mother comes in with her son, aged approx. 11 years old, with a bag full of xbox games to trade in. me: Hi! How can i help? mother: We'd like to trade in these for shop credit please. me: no problem! do you know what you'd like to buy with the credit yet? (i start checking and swiping the games as we're speaking, the mother looks at her son who shakes his head at her) me: that's fine - i can always give you a cash price for these, though it would be slightly lower than credit - or i can give credit and put it on a giftcard for you if you want to spend it another day. son: giftcard please. mother: (to son) but won't this leave you without *any* games?? son: yeah, but Dad's going to bring me to town tomorrow and get me GTA Fi- (at this point he trails off and looks at me, he knows he's put his foot in it) me: oh...uh... (to mother) i really feel i should mention that Grand Theft Auto is an 18 rated game for a VERY good reason... there's a torture scene.. mother: WHAT?! me: ...a LOT of swearing and violence, your sons character can have sex with prostitutes then murder them, there's also- mother: ABSOLUTELY NOT! (i stop at this point cause she shouts so loudly i genuinely think she's angry at ME for a second!) mother: THERE'S NO WAY! No WAY are you having THAT. (the kid sighs heavily and slumps down on to the counter) You KNEW about all of that didn't you?! There's NO WAY i'm buying you that, and your dad certainly wouldnt let you have it! ...i then go on to tell the woman about the bbfc and pegi ratings systems (using the 15 and 18 rated games her kid already owned, much to her dismay) she takes all the information gratefully and is genuinely happy that i'm showing her how to understand the ratings better (which is refreshing!!) all the while the kid is getting more and more worked up knowing he's not gunna get what he wanted... son: i'm NOT talking to you!!!! mother: oh, really??! i think you're forgetting who bought you all of those games in the first place... (to me) i'll take the cash amount please. she then sells all her kids games for cash, which she pops into her purse, smiles at me then swishes out of the shop - leaving her son open mouthed at the counter wondering what the heck just happened. i shrug at him and put what used to be his entire library of games into the traded drawer and call the next customer. go mum!! share your hilarious stories! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 It always amazes me how many parents don't know that games have age ratings. I used to count it as a mini victory when my mum would come into the shop and not realise the game she was buying me (or lending me the money for) was a 15 or something. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 That is pretty awesome and it is nice to actually hear a story from time to time where a parent gets told about the rating system and acts on that instead of just ignoring you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 I could never have Perfect Dark on the N64 because it was BBFC'd as an 18. I usually managed to wrangle my mum on everything else(somehow explaining away the sillyness of ELSPA ratings...possibly with something having a discrepency between an ELSPA and an BBFC rating). So she was quite good. Annoyed the fuck out of me, and I felt it was a bit overkill in some respects, but yeah. Does anyone even know why Perfect Dark was a bloody 18?! (This post is all about me because I haven't looked at the site because I'm at work...but I will when I get in!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 Someone once asked me if we had a mesh fabric that was completely waterproof. And another time, we were asked if a fabric would still be stretchy if they stitched a stretchy fabric to a non-stretch fabric. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 Does anyone even know why Perfect Dark was a bloody 18?! I'm not sure. I remember when we got PD. My aunt had given my brother and I a PlayStation game each (we didn't have a PlayStation) for Christmas so we went into WHSmiths to trade them in for Perfect Dark. The old lady didn't even bat an eyelid handing us over an 18 rated game. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 One thing that certainly did deserve its certificate was Turok 64. That game scared me fucking silly when playing alone at night back when I was a kid. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 This website is amazing. It's bringing back so many happy memories of disappointing customers Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 Reminds me of a story I read online. Some parents were with their kid buying him GTA V. The sales assistant tried to explain that the game was unsuitable for the kid as it has gratuitous violence, and you can sleep with a prostitute before killing her. They parents got angry with the shop assistant for talking about such things in front of their child... before proceeding to buy it for the kid. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 Back when I worked nights at a petrol station, a truck cab pulled in a filled up with £200 worth of diesel. He tried to pay by card, but due to the amount I had to ring the bank to verify the card. Being about 3 in the morning, banks were naturally closed. The guy got rather pissed and instead payed by card. Clearly the guy knew this would happen, as why else would he have been carrying over £200 in cash in the middle of the night? He stormed off after paying, calling me an arsehole and saying he would never get fuel there again. A few days later he came back. I didn't say a word and instead served him with the biggest shit eating grin I could muster. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 I loved whenever customers would say "I'm never shopping here again". Naturally shares went down 58%. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 One thing that certainly did deserve its certificate was Turok 64. That game scared me fucking silly when playing alone at night back when I was a kid. Because it was just so unreasonably awful? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 16, 2013 Love that site! I remember when I first discovered it back in the day; I spent the rest of the day reading through the entire archive. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 I once got so fed up with complaints from different customers that the chilled drinks were either too chilled or not chilled enough I snapped and said, with total deadpan: "I'm very sorry sir, I'm afraid this store is subject to the laws of thermodynamics." "Well, there's no need to be a jobsworth" was his tragically sincere reply. Another time a customer demanded to know why we didn't stock a specific brand of biscuits. I told him it was because all life was suffering. His response was simply "Oh" and then just walked off. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 I once got so fed up with complaints from different customers that the chilled drinks were either too chilled or not chilled enough I snapped and said, with total deadpan: "I'm very sorry sir, I'm afraid this store is subject to the laws of thermodynamics." "Well, there's no need to be a jobsworth" was his tragically sincere reply. Another time a customer demanded to know why we didn't stock a specific brand of biscuits. I told him it was because all life was suffering. His response was simply "Oh" and then just walked off. I had several great ones working in GAME back in the day. Me: Ok, for a return all you need to do is write your name address and telephone number and the reason for the return and I'll be happy to give you a replacement. Them: Why? Why do you need my name, address and telephone number? What's it to you? Why do they need to know? Me: (Looking around shifty eyed, leaning forward, whispering) I ... can't ... answer... that... question... now... sir.... someone... might... hear... me.... they have ears.... everywhere... Them: (Shocked) Oh god, really? (Runs out of the store) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 Another time a customer demanded to know why we didn't stock a specific brand of biscuits. I told him it was because all life was suffering. His response was simply "Oh" and then just walked off. BAHA!! stealing that one Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 Love that site! I remember when I first discovered it back in the day; I spent the rest of the day reading through the entire archive. Reddit has a good section for them as well as from other lines of work. http://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport http://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromretail http://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromTheJob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 I loved whenever customers would say "I'm never shopping here again". Naturally shares went down 58%. We got told that if one person stops shopping at Tesco due to a bad experience, it'd take 64 new customers to make up for the loss due to the shouting from the rooftops the hard-done by ex-customer. Personally I think that's bullshit, but they claim they've done studies. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 Daaaw, this one made me smile - (I am a swimming teacher for mainly children under five. It is after the final lesson of the day. I am standing chatting to the parents. A young girl I have just been teaching walks up to me.) Young Girl: “Excuse me. What are you doing?” Me: “What do you mean?” Young Girl: “Why aren’t you in the pool?” Me: “I don’t have anyone else to teach today. You were my last class.” Young Girl: “But I thought you lived in the pool. Aren’t you a mermaid, miss?” (I have to fight back the laughter as this little girl is completely serious, and is horrified to learn I don’t live in the pool! It’s things like this that make my job worthwhile.) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 Daaaw, this one made me smile - Loads of kids used to ask me similar things when I was a swimming teacher. My colleague had a similar experience when he bumped into a mum and kid in Tesco. The kid asked him why he was there and not in the swimming pool. The mum told the kid that he didn't live in the swimming pool and had to buy food too. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 Looks like it's got a couple of sister sites, NotAlwaysLearning is currently amusing me somewhat. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 @bluey, I think I might be alone in this, but I think what you did was lame. You ruined the kid's fun all for the sake of being PC. Boo! He was 11, not 7... =P Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 @bluey, I think I might be alone in this, but I think what you did was lame. You ruined the kid's fun all for the sake of being PC. Boo! He was 11, not 7... =P It's not being PC at all. There's a reason that it's against the law for an 11 year old to play those games. An 11 year old should certainly not be playing a game where gratuitous violence, mass murder and hooker loving is the main theme. Fair enough if he was 15/16, then your argument would stand, but not 11. Additionally, it's not like she was following them round the store to prevent them buying it, she was merely helping the mother make an informed decision about parenting. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 (edited) Should try call centre work, the customer is hardly ever right. I would go into some examples, but i'll wait until i get home before doing so. And @bluey, i 100% agree with your decision. It is your job, and as the child dug himself into that then it's his own fault. Edited October 17, 2013 by Jimbob Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 17, 2013 I’ve never worked in retail, but I can be the demanding client. Few days ago, I had to pay € 30.22. I had enough cash with me, but I didn’t want the change, so I asked if I could pin the € 0.22. Not a problem at all, but the woman next to me had to laugh.. A very long time ago, I went into a recordstore. There was this guy behind the counter who I hadn’t seen before up to that point, and he hadn’t seen me. I was walking up to the counter, reaching for my bank card and the paper with the titles I wanted, in my inner pocket, and I ask: “hey, do you have <title>?”. Guy looks scared, and says: “.. I thought you were going to rob me for a second..”. So I ask in reply: “do I look that scary to you?”. I found it hilarious. Also a long time ago, got a call from a funeral insurance company. Can’t recall the exact conversation obviously, but it was something like: “Hello, is mr. <my dad> in?” “No, I’m his son.” “Ah, that’s good too, do you have any funeral insurance?” “I have absolutely no idea.” “Surely you should know?” “I have no idea, my dad takes car of such things.” “Aren’t you interested in a funeral insurance?” “Frankly, I don’t care.” “Ok. Goodbye.” So I annoyed the call center worker. These were genuine responses as well, I stayed polite and didn’t intend to annoy her.. But I felt good about it. These stories also remind me of [The trenches comic site], about testers in the game industry, it’s from the guys behind Penny-Arcade and PVP. I don’t care about the comic itself, but the stories underneath it are funny, though I don’t know how truthful they are. Also, I totally disagree with the age rating systems. Thankfully, I never had any real issues with it, but my kids can play and see everything they want if I ever get them. The parents should be there to guide them, but they still should be free to learn from their own experiences and mistakes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
