Hamishmash Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 That sucks, Dyson (at least you didn't do it on Valentine's Day!). Sorry, that is really sad news but... I couldn't NOT laugh at this unintentional pun.
drahkon Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 I broke up with my girlfriend. I suppose there was a reason/were reasons for you to do that, so it's fine. When I broke up with my ex last year I too thought I made the biggest mistake in my life. We got back together and 3 weeks later I broke up again ergo I was the jerk...well, I deserved it. Yeah, you feel like an asshole but as I said: If there are good reasons for a brake up it's always better. You do not miss her, though. You will miss company. You'll miss the sex (sounds superficial but it's true). You'll need time to get over it, but the time will come. And when it does you can get out there again and do your thing. Remember:
Magnus Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 When I broke up with my ex last year I too thought I made the biggest mistake in my life. We got back together and 3 weeks later I broke up again ergo I was the jerk...well, I deserved it. It's funny how you posted a How I Met Your Mother video, because this reminds me of when Ted broke up with a girl on her birthday, and then got back together with her a couple of years later only to break up with her on her birthday again.
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 So one of my closest friends has recently turned against me for some reason. Always putting me down (in a semi-jokey way but I can feel the intent behind it) and just expecting the worst of me. I have no idea what I've done to cause this and when I asked her about it she just dodged the subject altogether. It's like I can't do anything right in her eyes and she obviously just thinks so little of me. That's been going on for a week or two but it really didn't help today when I've been having a bad day anyway. The tumble-drier doesn't seem to be working properly so the only work uniform I've got was a bit damp. It was too late to do anything about it so I just had to wear it and hope there would be a shirt at work that I could take. So I spent the first 5 minutes of my shift looking for a shirt but couldn't find one so I went to ask my supervisor (my friend from above^). She told me I don't actually start until 3 anyway so it turns out I had my hours wrong. She then berated me for being late if I actually was going to be starting at 12 - even though I wasn't actually late but of course she doesn't let me explain. It was only 12:05 and I'd been in for over 5 minutes just looking for a shirt. On top of this I have a 5000 word technical report to do that needs to be in on Thursday but as I've received absolutely no guidance on it, I have no idea what I need to put in it. I really badly need a haircut too and decided to use my extra time today to go to the hairdressers and get it done, only to find out they're closed. So yeah, having a bad day. Sounds like you need to talk to her straight up. (Yes, I know, way easier said than done. But if she keeps being a bitch to you, something needs to be done about it, right?)
nightwolf Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 Sounds like you need to talk to her straight up. (Yes, I know, way easier said than done. But if she keeps being a bitch to you, something needs to be done about it, right?) Agreed, I'd also mention to her that if she lets her personal life between the pair of you involve work life you can take it higher, which of course is a last resort, but I've seen it happen too often. I hope you can chat with her, my friend earlier last year was being a complete dick to me, for no reason she would snap and almost fight with me, over nothing, I had to end that pretty swiftly by confronting her harshly over what was going on and now a year on we're completely fine.
EEVILMURRAY Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 Go for the men then. We need more gays.
drahkon Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 It's funny how you posted a How I Met Your Mother video, because this reminds me of when Ted broke up with a girl on her birthday, and then got back together with her a couple of years later only to break up with her on her birthday again. Well, I didn't break up on my ex's birthday and I didn't wait a couple of years to get back together :p It was still not really a great thing to do, and I'm not proud of it. Today I realized for the first time that I will move away in 5 months. About 250 kilometers away from my hometown. On the one hand it's great because I'll start my apprenticeship as an air traffic controller, on the other hand I'll leave behind my family, friends and my girlfriend. Long distance relationships never work. Not good...
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Long distance relationships never work. *cough*Fleenuh*cough*
Dyson Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Thanks guys. It's been a pretty tough 24 hours or so but I do feel much better now knowing I've made the right decision. It basically boiled down to us not having much in common. My desire to see her was lessening constantly because we didn't do much bar watch TV or a DVD, or snuggle. I absolutely loved lying there and being close to her as she had a wonderful personality, but there was just no content to the relationship. We were close for the sake of being close. She was distraught when I told her, and I couldn't have done it any worse. I've never broken up with anyone before and didn't know how to go about it.. we had arranged to go out for a meal last night, and she had sent me a text explaining how excited she was. I didn't let on that I wanted to talk to her and so she arrived, happy as ever and really affectionate to me and I ended up just breaking down and telling her we wouldn't work out. The next hour we spent in the rain going through all sorts of emotions - her so more than me - and it just being the most depressing thing I've ever had to do. Inside I hate myself for doing it, because I feel that it may have been a weak reason to end it after everything else was going so well, but at the same time I know that she thought there was more substance to the relationship than there was. Last night it looked like we'd never speak again, but she called me this morning and shouted at me, after which we spoke a little and agreed to go for a drink tomorrow. She has said she can't promise she won't cry but definitely wants to do it, and so do I. I suggested it on the night. Thanks for the well wishes everyone. The timing wasn't ideal (it was fucking tragic timing) by anyones standards but it couldn't have waited. When I broke up with my ex last year I too thought I made the biggest mistake in my life. We got back together and 3 weeks later I broke up again ergo I was the jerk...well, I deserved it. She said several times that I was doing the wrong thing and we should give it another shot, pleading with me to change my mind. I had to use every strength in my body to not give in and say no after seeing the pure emotion she was going through. bleh.. Yeah, you feel like an asshole but as I said: If there are good reasons for a brake up it's always better. You do not miss her, though. You will miss company. You'll miss the sex (sounds superficial but it's true). I'm telling myself this at the moment, but I am very reliant on physical contact. Always been the hugging type between friends (none of that free hugs stuff though - urgh) and I know I'm going to miss the physical side of the relationship. I just don't know how much yet.
The Peeps Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 It is better that you ended it if you felt that way, rather than stringing her along. It's hard when you're with someone and you know they're not 'the one' for you. Hopefully you can come away from it still friends.
Paj! Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Mah bestie has been seeing/screwing this person who we call "Wiggle" (another story), who is a friend of a friend, but the friend doesn't know she's been seeing his friend. Tonight another friend of ours who is friends with the friend (we're all friends, but they're norwegian so language chat yeah) chatted to mah bestie while we were getting ready for our "orgy/gathering", and (while not knowing about mah besties's sexual histoy) started talking about the friend of a friend coincidentally. Mah bestie stopped her, realised it was the same guy, told her life story, and then our friend told her she was pretty sure he had a girlfriend. Worst of all, Wiggle was going to be the guest of the friend we're friends of tonight, so mah bestie was screaming about what to do if he just turned up. He didn't in the end. But it was bad for a while. Then she got over it and we all got drunk and editied our films with only a disco light to guide us.
drahkon Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 It basically boiled down to us not having much in common. Can I ask for how long you've been together? I had to use every strength in my body to not give in and say no after seeing the pure emotion she was going through. I know that feeling. It's really difficult to stand by what you did when the other one is just devastated. It's hard when you're with someone and you know they're not 'the one' for you. It took me almost a year to figure out that my ex wasn't 'the one'. Way too long, but hey, it was my first relationship and I was madly in love at first...if that counts as an excuse. It was hard to tell her that she is not 'the one'. *cough*Fleenuh*cough* Good point.
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Good point. Everyone's different, though, so long distance relationships may not work for you. There's only way to find out, really. It basically boiled down to us not having much in common. My desire to see her was lessening constantly because we didn't do much bar watch TV or a DVD, or snuggle. I absolutely loved lying there and being close to her as she had a wonderful personality, but there was just no content to the relationship. We were close for the sake of being close. It does sound like you weren't content with the relationship, and when that's the case, it just doesn't work. Both parties need to be happy with the relationship, not just one of them.
Hamishmash Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Go for the men then. We need more gays. Dude what are you doing??? Don't say that cos then everyone will turn gay and then it won't be cool anymore. Cos I totally was gay before it was cool, yeah...
Magnus Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Cos I totally was gay before it was cool, yeah... I think what you mean is that you're the reason being gay is cool.
Hamishmash Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 I think what you mean is that you're the reason being gay is cool. It is true. I was granted with the power of homosexuality in order to cancel out Louie Spence, Perez Hilton and Justin Bieber.
Magnus Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 That's a lot of pressure. You'd best work really hard at being a good homosexual!
Ramar Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Mah bestie has been seeing/screwing this person who we call "Wiggle" (another story), who is a friend of a friend, but the friend doesn't know she's been seeing his friend. Tonight another friend of ours who is friends with the friend (we're all friends, but they're norwegian so language chat yeah) chatted to mah bestie while we were getting ready for our "orgy/gathering", and (while not knowing about mah besties's sexual histoy) started talking about the friend of a friend coincidentally. Mah bestie stopped her, realised it was the same guy, told her life story, and then our friend told her she was pretty sure he had a girlfriend. Worst of all, Wiggle was going to be the guest of the friend we're friends of tonight, so mah bestie was screaming about what to do if he just turned up. He didn't in the end. But it was bad for a while. Then she got over it and we all got drunk and editied our films with only a disco light to guide us. Either I'm having a brain fart or that makes as much sense as Chewbacca living on Endor.
Paj! Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Either I'm having a brain fart or that makes as much sense as Chewbacca living on Endor. My parties are perversely nonsensical and always inappropriate. You can come to the next one. / I was drunk.
Ramar Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 My parties are perversely nonsensical and always inappropriate. You can come to the next one. / I was drunk. It wasn't so much the party more the waffle about friend of a friend of a friend of a friend's friend friend. False names would have worked better. But cheers for the invite.
Paj! Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Looks kind of bland to me. Look who's talking.
drahkon Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Everyone's different, though, so long distance relationships may not work for you. There's only way to find out, really. I'll try, but I'm not too optimistic. Fuck. Can't sleep. This has been going on for the last week now. Can't go to sleep until it's 5 or 6 in the morning and if I can I don't sleep for long. 3 to 4 hours max. Don't think I can make my life work for another 6 months being sleep-deprived. Thought I've been past that.
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