meeting people from the interwebs

[Guest bluey]

ok... so recently i met a guy online who's coming to japan in a few days to look for a teaching job. initially he was just asking for advice and stuff and we were chatting about random things, but when he told me he's traveling alone and has no friends in tokyo he was rather shocked that i immediately offered to meet him for a welcome coffee when he arrives... i know how lonely tokyo can be.

 

stu (that being his name) was mainly shocked at my random kindness (actually the town he'd come into from the airport is like, right down the road from me and i've got nothing better to do... so it's more boredom than kindness that's motivating me!! hehe) but also my apparent lack of concern that he MIGHT be a crazy axe murderer or something.

all the friends i've told this to have given me a SHOCK HORROR expression like i'm going on a private tour of his personal sex dungeon or something..

we're meeting in public, we've talked a little online first (skype video call too... so i know he's not actually a genius scientist monkey looking for a human body to steal...or something like that.) and i made him PROMISE not to murder me. should be fine, right??

the way i see it - it's like the extreme sports of friend-making...

...plus nobody's given me the OMG look about the girl i met the same way, and i'm meeting her for coffee on tuesday.

 

anyways... knowing that a few of you have met up for the n-e meets... what do you think to what i'm doing?

how has the stigma of "meeting strangers from the internet" changed since the early days of "your new friend is almost definitely a paedo pretending to be a kid"

how much do you think negative hype from the media effects people's decisions to meet online friends in person? aside from n-e meets, have you met online friends in real life before??

 

and of course ~ do you think what i'm doing is perfectly safe, or risky and reckless?

[MoogleViper]

I think it's safe as long as you aren't a complete idiot and make sure you stay in a public place.

 

And yeah the stigma that it once was is fading. But it's still there. Now it's seen more as a "You're a loser with no real friends." than "You're about to get raped."

[ReZourceman]

Yep.

 

I mean, its not like he asked. Its fine. Blueys kindness prevails.

 

 

I mean Christ....the people I met at the NE meet, they're all fine. They don't even remember the bad stuff.

 

[Supergrunch]

Just did this yesterday actually, albeit with other people from my university, so not quite the same I suppose. Anyway, 'twas fine, and my sister does it all the time to go to random gigs and things. I think you'll find the vast majority of internet people are (at least roughly) what they seem.

[Ashley]

As long as you ensure you do actually know them to a certain degree (ie not just 'mikeyr1992' wants to chat to you...screw online lets do it in real life!) and take precautions you'll be fine.

 

Done it a few times myself and only once did they turn out to be a ranting hateful Londoner, but I live with one anyway so it was all good :p

[or else you will DIE]

i don't see people on the internet as real people. nothing on the internet is real!

[Supergrunch]

i don't see people on the internet as real people. nothing on the internet is real!

Including yourself.

[rokhed00]

Done it loads of times, some of the people haven't been as nice as they seemed, but none of them were dangerous.

[or else you will DIE]

Including yourself.

exactly ertergdg

[EEVILMURRAY]

Go forth and Shabba'ise.

[gaggle64]

Better bring a friend or two when you meet him to help protect you against possible sodomisation. Unless you're into that kind of thing of course.

[Shorty]

Well I've met a lot of people from the interwebs, even met someone in another country on my own. Met jayseven and become flatmates. I would say I felt perfectly safe every time. But one thing that concerns me about your situation, Bluey, is the third word of your post, "recently". I don't think I would really meet anyone that I hadn't been talking to for a long time, that I didn't feel I could trust due to a myriad of almost-unfakeable backups to their 'story', such as social site profiles, pictures, a group of friends that knew them personally. Even just being a member of N-E for about a year would give me some feeling of trust.

 

not really sure how to end this post, *leaves it there*

[Falcon_BlizZACK]

...Just keep an unsheathed katana down your trouser leg. I think its safe but...you know, you just don't know. And for some reason, people I've met online interested in japan were some what 'freaky'. Like some had a derranged lust for Japanese women (Asiaphillia lol), which seemed to be the prime force which spurred their interest in japan... Nothing really of relevence here. Just be careful.

[nightwolf]

It's alot safer than people make out it is, specially if you are in somewhere quite loud and lots of people are around.

 

Just keep your wits about you, keep people around. You'll be fine, besides meeting new peope is pretty fun imo.

[MoogleViper]

If anything bad starts to happen, just tell him you know MoogleViper. That'll sort him out.

[Kirkatronics]

Nothing these days is 100% safe, and i mean nothing.

Remember that cuddley toy choking incident?

Anyway, just meet in a public place, or with a lot of people.

Dont let him change your mind within a few hours of meeting.

 

Overall, dont worry, ultimatly its your choice.

 

[Add another option for "Not My DEcision ~ GL Anyway ]

[Ramar]

If anything bad starts to happen, just tell him you know MoogleViper. That'll sort him out.

 

The last time I used the "I know MoogleViper" line I got a slap round the face!

[Kirkatronics]

The last time I used the "I know MoogleViper" line I got a slap round the face!

If you say it again, ill do it harder!

[Aimless]

You're just meeting them for a coffee. He might be a relative stranger, but surely you pack yourself into a carriage of 30 or so complete strangers every time you catch a train?

 

If you were inviting him to stay in your apartment having only just met him then that might be a bit reckless, but it would be no less so if you had first met them face to face; people can lie outside the confines of the internet. So long as you exercise some common sense I don't think the point of contact really comes into it.

[Kirkatronics]

You're just meeting them for a coffee. He might be a relative stranger, but surely you pack yourself into a carriage of 30 or so complete strangers every time you catch a train?

 

If you were inviting him to stay in your apartment having only just met him then that might be a bit reckless, but it would be no less so if you had first met them face to face; people can lie outside the confines of the internet. So long as you exercise some common sense I don't think the point of contact really comes into it.

People meet people on nights out and take them home for an ...um.. coffee.

[Aimless]

People meet people on nights out and take them home for an ...um.. coffee.

People do a lot of stupid things.

[Kirkatronics]

People do a lot of stupid things.

Just pointing out people take risks like this everyday.

Most turn out fine, a small portion doesnt.

[Guest bluey]

Just pointing out people take risks like this everyday.

Most turn out fine, a small portion doesnt.

 

but gaspies!! i am not taking him for air-quotation-mark-coffee.

i'm going for ACTUAL coffee!! how very much dare you!!! haha.

[MoogleViper]

The last time I used the "I know MoogleViper" line I got a slap round the face!

 

If you say it again, ill do it harder!

 

To be fair I have shared an intimate hug with warandchaos. I think he was jealous that me and you had done the same.

[Kirkatronics]

To be fair I have shared an intimate hug with warandchaos. I think he was jealous that me and you had done the same.

Shh