Jump to content
N-Europe

The Bard

Members
 View Profile  See their activity

  • Posts

    8672

  • Joined

  • Last visited

 Content Type 

Everything posted by The Bard

  1. The Bard
    You know what that needs? Put a bangin' donk on it.
  2. The Bard
    Trials 2: This is the most punitive and addictive game ever. Also the most aptly named. A physics based game where you control a motorcyclist from a 2D perspective and manuever him through a series of obstacles, except these obstacles are placed in such a way, and the implementation of inertia so exaggerated that completing a course is really a meaure of testicular fortitude. This is not a game that exceeds the sum of its parts; it has nothing to do with any of its parts. Any enjoyment of this game is an abstraction, because what you really are enjoying is the punishment you're inflicting on yourself. Its a tool for exacting vengeance on every heinous moral crime you have ever committed. It will absolve you of your sins. And by that measure, it is Jesus. On a scale of 1 to Awesome, its Super Great.
  3. The Bard
    Thankfully, my brain fires words at a rate an alternate reality version of Chamillionaire with tourettes would be envious of. It will result in 10,000 words worth of the most garbled mess you can imagine. Except I cannot be arsed tbh atm. No deadlines? Barsteward.
  4. The Bard
    Balls, three essays to do that I was totally unaware of, within the space of 5 days. Fortunately, two of them I can do with relative ease since one is on Milton, and the other on Nietzsche, both of whom I have a decent knowledge of, only problem is that you have to do background research from journal articles and shit, which I truly cba, and then, the third essay from my Fiction and Narrative module is so utterly nebulous and hopelessly unexciting that I may as well kill myself.
  5. The Bard
    Awesome sauce. Getting to see Baroness in a week and a half, its gonna be unholy.
  6. The Bard
    In recent light, I need to annex Company of Heroes to my list. Also: Fuck, I'm gonna need to set up my Wii and give ol F-Zero a spin, loved that game.
  7. The Bard
    Cute as hell. She's got your eyes brah.
  8. The Bard
    Also, "Daisy Dares." 1. In as much as you need a point of reference for everything, here are mine: I sense a wholesale robbery of Dan Dare's name, and a mimicry of Regina Specter's accentual affectations, of course, where those two come off as charming, she comes off as a dumb bint. 2. Both of them are so fuggin caustically butt ugly that I can almost see the scorch marks on my corneas from attempting to watch the videos. 4. I'm sorry. (there is a "3." but it's mean.)
  9. The Bard
    I have been propelled into such a violent rage as could enable me to perform superhuman feats, like butcher a rhinocerous with my bare hands, after hearing that. Of course, ostensibly, music exists to evoke emotion, and by that measure, this shit is pretty fucking "musical."
  10. The Bard
    It's like telling someone to move on from the death of a loved one Teebs I can't get into MW2 either, no sense of community.
  11. The Bard
    I'm just so excited! Pocket calculators are so fantastic!
  12. The Bard
    I have been reading about Base-8 maths. As a result, I seem to have developed this curious affinity for Kraftwerk. Wir fahren fahren fahred auf die autobahn.
  13. The Bard
    This could be rad. Why not.
  14. The Bard

    Man balls. Oh well, not like I got anything else to do =p.

  15. The Bard
    I yearn for this, like a child for its mothers teat. Wherefore art thou, McMad? =(.
  16. The Bard
    Thats really quite intriguing, because I had you down as this platonic conception of otherworldly beauty. "What's in an avatar? That which we see as a Willis, By any other image would still stir our loins."
  17. The Bard
    What do you people mean? Oh god, just found a video of me and my mates playing soul calibur back at A level days in school, and I had long hair. So many fond memories . So attractive...=p Edit: I am so doped up on medozlam that I think showing this is a good idea. Tomorrow morning will not be pleasant.
  18. The Bard
    I'm done paying exorbitant amounts of emotional energy to my conscience. I will henceforth do what so ever the fuck I please.
  19. The Bard
    Yeah, but I'm an ignorant motherfucker.
  20. The Bard
    Dude, this chick sounds like a grunion. Everyone knows that all of the fun is in the chase and everything after just savours of anticlimax.
  21. The Bard
    Paj looks so grunge in that last photo, he could have been pulled straight from a Pearl Jam gig in the early nineties. Approved.
  22. The Bard
    I think it would be fairly anachronistic and...pointless to put any order to these, but here are my top games of the 2000's. And by that I mean the games that were most important to me. Not you. Me. So no bitching The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker Bioshock Resident Evil 4 Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time Crysis Final Fantasy XII is interchangable with Golden Sun (to let nostalgia have its way, but FFXII is a much more revolutionary game) Street Fighter 3: Third Strike Metroid Fuckin Prime (The memories of this are so overwhelmingly orgiastic, that I really dont want to revisit it for fear that they're all, utterly misinformed) Phoenix Wright: Trials And Tribulations. Gears of War The one thing this list has done is told me how many games there actually are that were so totally fantastic in every way I can remember. In fact, I have fonder memories of videogames than pretty well any other medium. A hearty applause.
  23. The Bard
    Kenneth fucking Brannagh? Oh no Dan. Is this a dagger which I see before me? To be fair, I've held a grudge ever since he butchered Hamlet. I partly agree with the performance thing, since Shakespeare is all about the dialogue, and sometimes when you're reading its harder to contextualise then it is in performance where (hopefully) some indications are given. Even then though, you get a sense for it after you've read enough. Man, I haven't seen a play for so long. Boo Oh yeah! And, reading, as prescribed by the wonderful Supergrunch, Steven Pinkers "The Language Instinct." I'm only about 170 pages through, but it is so amazingly enlightening and such a great tool, and at times, the ways in which I think it succeeds best is that it objectivises and gives me a descriptive vocabulary for trends and phenomena that I had some kind of inkling of, but no real way to describe. On top of that it just heaps it on with awesome stuff everyone should know. Might describe later in another thread in much detail. God, the book is like a slow drip of opiates for the brain. So far.
  24. The Bard
    Oh Chair, you afford me much amusement. And yeah, that shit is fucking rampant in London especially. GTFO indeed.
  25. The Bard
    Anyway, a trend that annoys me is an interesting one, since its been one thats been a bit of a bugger since the dawn of time: opinion. No not the actual thing, but the abstraction, the term, nothing but an excuse for the filth and ignominy of ignoramuses to propogate and have children that grow up with this false sense of entitlement. The eject button of all failed logicians. The fact that people think they are always right (for the record, I do not, I just have been very fortunate in that most of my arguments on here are conducted with fucknuts) In fact, you want my idea of your opinion? (unless I like you, you happy few) get yourself to a dimension constructed in its molecularity from feces and vomitous slime and the bonds that connect the two are always Hitler, then come back and give me your impressions: That, is your opinion. Other irks include...actually no, everything stems from this. I have sublimated the first principles of existential disharmony to opinion. Yes. Oh yeah; fake tans (or a layer cake of foundation) and pale glossy lipstick. Nobody thinks its attractive, and to be honest, any lad that takes you home is gonna end up prodding you in the rear, since its more degrading, and people of your disposition cannot be allowed to: 1. Be allowed any pleasure and satisfaction in life 2. Be allowed to reproduce.
×
×
  • Create New...