LazyBoy

Vote:Moogleviper

Ha Vote:Zell

Since Dabookerman left we're short of these, so please if you are a dirty old man sign up and join the fun. Some of the younger users need some abusing anyway.

I'm afraid I can't empathise with you, I'm actually a total c**t.

Ha, i'd forgotten how long we had to wait for the GC version.

Noddy. Christ I had nightmares about that. And Rupert the bear. I think it was the sweater he wore more than anything else.

What Mike1988uk said

Relevant: Any I believe there's hope for redemption for everyone.

Toady a tale has been told. A tale of love, friendship, and a couple hundred premature ejaculations. The story has come to an end, but the lessons learned from it will live on forever. The words here will become memories, those memories will become history, and history will become legend. But though we we may forgot how, or what, or why in God's name someone would think it a good idea to ask a Nintendo forum for sex advice, we will always remember, that this was an Epic thread. And so comes to end Epic Thread 3: The Chronicles of the Virgin King Now lock this thread, so it dies this way, and so we can all get on with our lives.

I couldn't make out anything else. Anyway, congratulations my boy. Now the real fun begins.

I'm a man of my word. Chalked up a lovely lady in a coffee shop. The rest is up to you King. Good night, and good luck.

Thinking of organising an N-Europe mass lay now. Get it on in honour of the King's first trip to candyland. Anyone else? Nah I only got slapped with neglect. It was the second time we did it I got hit with the necrophilia charge.

I'll go get Rokhed

I like the art direction, and I reckon some of the less pretty areas will be cleaned up. It'll be in the 80% range, its got my interest.

Vote: Dohnut boy

Yes. Well everything apart from the grilled cheese sandwiches. That was literal.

Ahh to be in an epic thread. Right King my boy, you aint going to get past missionary the first time, keep it simple. However we can start playing with a different set of cards the second time, but it depends on the woman you happen to be doing to dirty to. If she's nice and flexible, and has her weight down, then you want her legs resting on your shoulder whilst you're standing up supporting her weight with those piston shaped arms of yours. Now if you decided to super size for the night (and don't be ashamed, I will personally attest to the brilliance of fat sex) then you want to take it old school and bend her over the washing machine. Slap her upside the rump like you're tenderizing that meat for eating. And afterwards, grilled cheese sandwiches.

The article I quoted is dated 3 years ago. Sorry, I know you're a marvel fan.

Isn't 616 the calling card of the devil. I mean I know 666 is traditionally used but I swear I saw something on QI about it being general ignorance and 616 is the actual one. Edit: Source: Those Adrenaline Junkies over at Religion News Blog

If you mean funny like in the way being strapped to a windmill naked (whilst everyone you know watches as a pair of blind kingfishers attempt to pluck every last pubic hair from your body) makes you want to kill yourself, then yeah I guess it is kind of funny. God i'm so sick of this shit.

Chalk me up for one of these and a couple "not more of this shit".

The end is a little better in the book I think. Marla was kind of forgotten towards the end of the film but she is better flushed out in the book. But it really is a judgement call, I only narrowly choose the book.

We expect a post game report just so you know.

Vote:Vicar Arrrrrgh

Is the cheer disbelief you're actually doing it. First time ain't about enjoying it, throw the romantic shit out the window. The first time sucks and anyone who tells you different ain't had good sex. The first time is about checking out the turf, running the length of the pitch and getting rid of those nerves that you get when you first step out onto the field (hey, a football analogy). Remember, sex aint about love, it's a sport. Just like your tae-kwon-do, you're gonna get kicked the the head a couple of times at first (literally in my case), but practice enough and she'll be on her back screaming in no time. And that my boy, is where babies come from.