The Official Boast You Had Sex Thread

[Guest Jordan]

Just don't drop the soap.

 

Roger that!

[ReZourceman]

Roger that!

 

Isnt that what hes trying to avoid?

[EEVILMURRAY]

I'll go for some boasting.

[martinist]

blam this thread

[Mundi]

Pfft, girlfriends are for noobs that don´t know how to download porn

[Guest Jordan]

Pfft, girlfriends are for noobs that don´t know how to download porn

 

Haha, awesome

[Kurtle Squad]

I've noticed a few of you like to talk about your sexual conquests. Do it in here so we sadder members don't have to be constantly reminded we aren't getting any.

You do realise most sexual references are in 'joke' form right?

 

 

Pfft, girlfriends are for noobs that don´t know how to download porn

I think you're quite mistaken. Girlfriends are, in-fact, simply an upgrade of regular porn, in that they're interactive porn.

[Hellfire]

I wish I could post in this thread.

Time Paradox.

[Fierce_LiNk]

I haven't had sex in about 3 days.

 

At least, i think it's 3. But then, certain factors have to be taken into consideration. Such as: Tiredness. Going out. Running out of ice cream.

[Guest Jordan]

....Ice cream? O_o

[AshMat]

I put on my wizard's hat and cape..

[Guest Jordan]

I haven't had sex in:

 

In months: 221 months

In weeks: 996 weeks

In days: 6768 Days

In hours: 162420 hours

[Cube]

I haven't had sex in:

 

In months: 221 months

In weeks: 996 weeks

In days: 6768 Days

In hours: 162420 hours

 

Exactly the same here, but 6763 days.

[BeerMonkey]

bout 2 months ago now really should try harder to get a girlfriend

[Haden]

Exactly the same here, but 6763 days.

 

Weere you both invoved in some sort of week long orgy?

 

Erm anyway sex for me is kind of like my thoughts on getting a car. I would either have to pay for it or get someone to give it to me! But Im quite chilled out I think I must be autistic I dont care to much although I would like a gf.

[Mundi]

I think you're quite mistaken. Girlfriends are, in-fact, simply an upgrade of regular porn, in that they're interactive porn.

 

 

Well porn dosen´t say it has a headache or isn´t in the mood when you turn it on :P

[Platty]

I dont like to boast but I was getting it daily some times twice a day but my GF now has a full time job so now its maybe once or tWice a week. Platty gets upset with me cos I am get loads and he is not!

 

Hey i get sex, just not 5 times a day like you mr horn dog. Plus when i do it, im the bestest. King of the bedroom

[DiemetriX]

Beeing the king of the bedroom is fantastic <3

[Cubechris]

Beeing the king of the bedroom is fantastic <3

 

What about the King of the Kitchen?

[Charlie]

Weere you both invoved in some sort of week long orgy?

 

Erm anyway sex for me is kind of like my thoughts on getting a car. I would either have to pay for it or get someone to give it to me! But Im quite chilled out I think I must be autistic I dont care to much although I would like a gf.

 

Not going well with that girl you were talking about then?

 

(I haven't seen mine since yesterday)

[Haden]

Not going well with that girl you were talking about then?

 

(I haven't seen mine since yesterday)

 

Hmm its kinda not going anywhere. I may have to take a risky move today that may expose me as a stalker or shower me with glory. If it goes wrong at least it will be more cringeworthy than Extras every time I have to see her on a Monday morning. Cashback!

 

As for sex I want to have sex with someoneI have been going out for for an age and start doing a partridge impression. "So what do you think about the pedistranisation of Norwich city centre? I here its good for (voice changes) wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllllchairsss" Epic stuff.

[demonmike04]

Just don't drop the soap.

 

Ha, hillarious!

 

Me? Sex? Meh, im king, im picky. Nearly got some last month, but she offered a hand instead.

[The Bard]

I've only had sex twice =S. Thankfully I wasn't drunk either time, which might come as a surprise.

[Twozzok]

I put on my wizard's hat and cape..

 

I think you'll find the phrase is

 

I put on my robe and wizards hat

[DiemetriX]

What about the King of the Kitchen?

 

Beeing the king of the kitchen is also great. I have had sex on the dinner table once or twice. [in the kitchen]

 

But If you mean "Skilled in making food"... then I'm out. I really suck at making anything edible.