Serebii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Yeah but is it worth 'getting your end away' with a long time friend? Assuming it goes no where, you've then got an awkward situation with her for the rest of your life. Exactly. If this was any other girl, you can bet that I would, however as she is a long time friend. Not a chance. I'm not going to ruin friendships
Zechs Merquise Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Got blocked by a tinder match after sending her a friend request after speaking to her for well over a month , said it made her feel uncomfortable ... This year is going awfully . Don't take that as a bad thing, she is obviously a time waster and a complete freak. If you spend over a month talking to someone and they haven't actually met you and won't even accept friend requests then they are clearly messing you around or some kind of nutcase! You dodged a bullet, just dust yourself off and keep looking, Tinder is a numbers game, swipe enough times, get enough matches and sooner or later you'll end up sat in a restaurant with a nice lady!
MoogleViper Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Got blocked by a tinder match after sending her a friend request after speaking to her for well over a month , said it made her feel uncomfortable ... This year is going awfully . Don't friend request until you've been on a few dates. You want to be able to end it easily. Being facebook friends just makes that awkward.
Shorty Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 @Serebii from the sounds of things, I wouldn't risk your friendship with this girl either. Got blocked by a tinder match after sending her a friend request after speaking to her for well over a month , said it made her feel uncomfortable ... This year is going awfully . You tracked her down on Facebook after chatting on Tinder? Yeah... I think that would make me uncomfortable too. Especially if they didn't even give you their surname :/ Seems to me you generally need to ease off in your approach a little.
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 She did give me her surname though, had her on whatsapp as well . I've had girls follow me on Instagram from tinder doesn't weird me out at all
Shorty Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 (edited) Hm not quite as bad then, but I don't really see any reason to add someone on Facebook without asking them first. In fact, there's no need to progress from tinder to a social network at all. For me it's been tinder > chat for anything from hours to weeks > arrange a date > ask for phone number (comes across as a pretty reasonable request when you're about to meet up irl). I'm serious about easing off your approach though. I remember the first bit of advice on your previous troubles that @Blade gave you was the no-contact rule, which you totally ignored and it cost you. Try not to always be the one who initiates conversation, try not to always be the last one to send a message. Not only does it come across way less needy, but makes you feel better in hindsight too. Edited April 1, 2016 by Shorty
Zechs Merquise Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 She did give me her surname though, had her on whatsapp as well . I've had girls follow me on Instagram from tinder doesn't weird me out at all Don't worry about it, just don't engage with time wasters. Tinder is a quick way to get to see if you like the look of someone, a place where you can arrange to meet up - or at least talk on the phone! Did you talk on the phone to her? If not, then there is something wrong. If you've met someone on Tinder and you haven't at least tried to arrange a date in the first week or so of talking, it is a little odd. People who are on these apps or on dating websites and just spend their time talking to people with no intention of meeting are wasting other people's time. If a you've been chatting to someone for well over a month and you haven't met or even spoken to them properly, odds on they are a time waster or some kind of weirdo! Save you time and energy for someone who actually wants to meet up with you and spend quality time together so you can actually see if you click.
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Think it was more networking as I had just move to the area. Lesson learned though
Blade Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 @stuwii Yeah mate just ease off completely. It may be the case that you are not ready to date. I went through a dramatic break up with my ex girlfriend last year which broke me. I started to date straight away but it didn't work out. Just chill out for a couple of months. There is no rush.
Ashley Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Yeah but is it worth 'getting your end away' with a long time friend? Assuming it goes no where, you've then got an awkward situation with her for the rest of your life. Exactly. If this was any other girl, you can bet that I would, however as she is a long time friend. Not a chance. I'm not going to ruin friendships Depends on the people and situation obviously, but I've had people that have gone from one nights to friends to maybe something more to back to friends and others that have gone from friends to a casual thing to friends again.
bob Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Depends on the people and situation obviously, but I've had people that have gone from one nights to friends to maybe something more to back to friends and others that have gone from friends to a casual thing to friends again. And what a night that was!
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Maybe a case of just having some fun... Lot harder when not at uni anymore
Daft Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 I'm with @Zechs Merquise, bullet dodged. If you aren't comfortable with a Friends request on Facebook – and that's fine because people use Facebook in different ways – the appropriate response isn't to block the other person completely. Like Zechs said, time waster.
bob Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 My wife didn't know who Ronnie Corbett was, so I had to spend yesterday evening instructing her.
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 I feel like I have to forgive myself for the failures in the relationship first , made her upset once by accident and I think I payed the ultimate price . Although we had made plans for me to see her after that . All I know there is a lot I can learn for next time
Shorty Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 If you can find it in your heart to forgive yourself for those mistakes, I can find it in my heart to forgive you for putting spaces before all your punctuation. Deal? <3
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 I'll try . It's just in three months I've gone from waking up next to her to here ... Not sure if I'll ever find another but definitely going to try
Zechs Merquise Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 I feel like I have to forgive myself for the failures in the relationship first , made her upset once by accident and I think I payed the ultimate price . Although we had made plans for me to see her after that . All I know there is a lot I can learn for next time You need to listen this - it is hard advice to swallow, but listen! If you love someone, you will upset them from time to time - whether accidental or not - that is part of life. Equally, if someone loves you, whether by accident or intention, at times they will upset you. But if you are genuinely in love, you forgive those things, especially if they are accidents. If someone leaves you on the pretext of something you did by accident, they are most likely using that one thing as an excuse to get out or a focal point to vent built up anger and feelings that are based on wider ranging issues and have been building for some time. When ever someone says to me "Me and my girl were fine, but I then did 'X' and she flew off the handle and left", it's 99% of the time safe to say that 'X' wasn't the real reason they left, but was simply used as the reason to justify leaving. The break up was actually caused by many other reasons, but the person doing the breaking up didn't want to raise those reasons or talk about them so was looking for an excuse to leave and found it when 'X' took place. You don't need to forgive yourself, you need to realise that the relationship you were in wasn't right for you - and it wasn't your fault. You can't live your life walking on egg shells trying not to upset someone so they don't have a pretext to leave. If someone loves you, they won't be looking for a pretext to leave and you won't need to walk on egg shells and constantly analyse your own behaviour. Ask yourself this - if someone you loved hurt you by accident, would you leave? If the answer is 'no', then maybe the person you were with didn't love you in the way you thought, and if that is case, then maybe you are better off looking for someone who does.
MoogleViper Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 I'll try . try . ry . y . It doesn't look like you tried.
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 Sadly I think that was the case. I felt for a very very long time like I loved her a lot more than she loved me. Maybe that was always the case
stuwii Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 It's probably best to say how you feel shorty... Sets a bad precedent if you make things more serious down the line. Obviously do it when the timing is right
Ramar Posted April 1, 2016 Posted April 1, 2016 My wife didn't know who Ronnie Corbett was, so I had to spend yesterday evening instructing her. Instructing the solicitor for a divorce, right?
stuwii Posted April 2, 2016 Posted April 2, 2016 Well I've decided I need to find a way to date out of uni and don't even know where to start. How do people meet people in the real world?
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