Dan_Dare Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 Can I also point out that Norfolk is shit, and you'd be doing her a favour if she didn't leave?
Guest bluey Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 i'm with aimless on this one, since he's revealed himself as an advice guru or forts O__o flink you seem like a lovely person with a great sense of what's the right thing to do - and the friendship you have with this girl is really special. she knows how you feel, and you know how she feels... now it's up to her to decide what she wants. the part where you have to worry is over, so try to chill ^__^ and enjoy the time you have together now. Can I also point out that Norfolk is shit, and you'd be doing her a favour if she didn't leave? i travel to middlesbrough* to visit jamba~ nowhere is shit if you're visiting someone you love :wink: *voted worst place to live in the UK 2007
Fierce_LiNk Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 ..Indeed she did. I take back what i said. Also if i was the guy, i'd be pissed if i knew what was going on. I'd be pissed as well, at both of us. Which makes me feel pretty damn awful tbh.
Charlie Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 Well just found that singleness makes me feel lonely. I've been talking to my mate and he thinks there could be something going on between me and this girl who i was chattin 2 last night and all of last week Half of the people in the pub last night thought that me and this girl were an item and were going out but really we are mates. Well, i shall see what happens That's what happens when you're really good friends with a girl; everyone automatically thinks you're shagging her. And to be perfectly honest, in my case, I wish I was going out with her.
Haden Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 It's not really about me making up my mind though, since it's her who has to make a decision...if there even is a decision to be made. That's one side of it, but that is only if I make the decision to...I dunno, ask her to do something about the way things are. Yeah, he's been down, and that's when me and her were sat next together when she typed that stuff on the computer for only the two of us to see. That's the other side of things, I guess. Oh shit dude... This is intense wow i dont know what to say you need to tell her how you feel but remain refrained and not make any desicions that she may try and get you to make.
Fierce_LiNk Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 Just for some additional information: We've been close friends ever since I've moved in, and we've even called each other best mates and closest mates. A while ago, she said that if things didn't work out in the future for either of us, we would be each other's back ups. I thought she was just being daft at first, but we've always had this mutual respect and connection with each other so that's probably why it meant a lot to her. Our housemates have always said that we seem very coupley and they've made comments and jokes and things, and we've played along with it, but it was only very recently when she told me she cared about me in that way that I started to think of us differently, and it's something that she's been thinking of for a while. I love her, and in a sense I guess I have felt like that for a while, I just didn't realise it until she said. I regret her telling me it now because it's almost an impossible situation. She told me that she wishes we had met up years ago before all of this, but that's something we can't change.
Gizmo Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 I think you're telling this to the wrong people; tell her, and let her decide what she wants for herself. You aren't going to be "ruining" her future if she decides to change her future plans; you would be ruining it if you didn't give her that choice. If she chooses you then that means it's what she wants, and by not telling her how you feel about the whole situation you might be stopping her having that choice.
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 I think you're telling this to the wrong people; tell her, and let her decide what she wants for herself. You aren't going to be "ruining" her future if she decides to change her future plans; you would be ruining it if you didn't give her that choice. If she chooses you then that means it's what she wants, and by not telling her how you feel about the whole situation you might be stopping her having that choice. But whos to know what she wants next year or worst, in a few months time? What if she feels she had a better relationship with the other guy? Its tricky imo. Deciphering what girls want is an endless chore.
Calza Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 Yeah but as the saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost to have not loved at all. (Somebody has said that already havn't they?). You've got something with this amazing girl and you will only regret it if you don't at least tell her how you feel. If you don't it will just hang over you like a big 'What If?'...
Fierce_LiNk Posted February 3, 2008 Posted February 3, 2008 I won't be seeing her til Thursday, as coincedentally she is going back to Norfolk for a few days to attend some interviews for teaching posts. I guess I'll just have to talk to her then. I don't think it'll achieve anything, as I think she knows how I feel about her, and her life is pretty much set up for her. Defeatest attitude, I know.
Jamba Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 Personally Flink I think you should let her go move back home. If she breaks up with her fella on her own then see if there is anything to pick up from. I've always found this to be a good plan as relationships are long term and emational states, no matter how much they try to convince you otherwise, are short term. It will take a while for you to see if this is really what you want.
Mr_Odwin Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 I'd try and get the girl. It's not fair on her bloke that she's keeping with the relationship anyway - it'll probably end for them in some way or another, but if you lay all your cards on the table at least you may benefit from it (and she would too, by being in a better relationship). It's not selfish if it improves life for everyone (even for the guy in the relationship in the long term).
Dan_Dare Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 this just in: I'm entirely fucking sick of being single.
AshMat Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 this just in: I'm entirely fucking sick of being single. In what scientists are calling "pretty gay", me too.
The Bard Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 It's worst when you're newly single, everything just depresses you. Man I fucking hate happy couples. Shit, I hate couples period. Gets better with time though.
Dan_Dare Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 i'm more in the 'fuck this i'm sickeningly bored on my own, somebody take me home' phase.
gaggle64 Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 It's worst when you're newly single, everything just depresses you. Man I fucking hate happy couples. Shit, I hate couples period. Gets better with time though. Time, and crazed revenge attacks.
Calza Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 Only ten days till that special day... And I'm getting enormously confused, I don't know whether she likes me, I just wish I could get over her but I can't at all.
Guest bluey Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 Only ten days till that special day...And I'm getting enormously confused, I don't know whether she likes me, I just wish I could get over her but I can't at all. actually, i'm all for the traditional stalker-type "i've watched you from my car for weeks now and i think you're HAWT. hugs! your valentine xx" anonymous notes is anyone going to do that?
Calza Posted February 4, 2008 Posted February 4, 2008 Maybe... I doubt it, but it would be nice to see her reaction.
nightwolf Posted February 4, 2008 Author Posted February 4, 2008 9 months, pssh 3 months and it'll have been a year. I may have to buy a thai husband, xD
nightwolf Posted February 4, 2008 Author Posted February 4, 2008 I found it easier to cope with not ever experincing a other half than putting up without when you've had an other half. So yes nearly a year is quite bad.
nightwolf Posted February 4, 2008 Author Posted February 4, 2008 Year is nothing, 3+ gets worrying Hopefully uni for me will make sure that doesn't happen
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