Posted April 22, 2007 I aint been in like 3 days, i feel crap. What can i do to make me go? Orange juice, running? Anyone know any good secret's to help me, i really feel bad. Anything Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Don't have any, i feel physically ill cuase i aint been in so long... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 3 fucking days. Holy shit (pun very much intended), you're a living miracle. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Bran flakes, organic yoghurt and fresh vegetables. And see a doctor for petes sake. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 colonic irrigation or a chocolate laxative?, a colonic is your best bet probebly wow some girl is being raped on tv...yeay! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Try one of those machines, with a belt on it and it vibrates your stomach. I've only seen it in a film, Blast from the Past. His mother uses it, Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 ..get plenty of fibre into your system.. that should hopefully help.. and eat spicy food etc.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I don't need to see a doctor, i just must of ate stuff that bung's you up. I might just eat laods so it forces it out... Try one of those machines, with a belt on it and it vibrates your stomach. I've only seen it in a film, Blast from the Past. His mother uses it, Good idea, i have one under my bed i'll just dig it out and use it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 This... is an AWESOME thread! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 take a warm bath to relax and then sit on the toilet and try your hardest to squeeze one out. woo yeah. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I'm actually feeling someting now, it might be all the talk about it. I hope i go... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Yeah, I agree with that guy, it's pretty much an issue of dislodging the dam before the floodgates open. I'm going to have that visual stuck in my head for a couple of weeks. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I usually only shit every 3 or 4 days, leaving a brick that's impossible to flush down. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I tend to get blocked when I go on holiday. One thing I do not reccomend, that relieved me when I was blocked in paris, was having someone accidently stand on my right bollock. I'd recommend flat pepsi/cola or get yourself in a brewing position (don't ask). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I usually only shit every 3 or 4 days, leaving a brick impossible to flush down. rough. my life would be feel incomplete if i didn't take my daily morning shit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I may not have one in the loading bay either , but this thread has made me PMSL , so 1 out of 2 aint bad. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Sit down, arse wide open, on the bog, playing Brain Training. Teh shit is inevitable. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Don't have any' date=' i feel physically ill cuase i aint been in so long...[/quote']Then fucking go out and get some! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 I always find that Angel Delight milkshake (made with twice the normal amount of milk) works well. Preferably butterscotch flavour. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Scoff a multipack of pepperami firesticks. By the morning you should have cooked up a great recipe in your stomach for approx. 6-12 hours supply of rusty water. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 One thing I do not reccomend, that relieved me when I was blocked in paris, was having someone accidently stand on my right bollock. Accidentally? Yeah, right. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 ..isn't it awful when you have to go out somewhere really soon and you know before you go out that you're definitely gonna need one.. but it's just not ready before you leave the house and then you don't have a chance to go for several hours.. ..awful.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 ..isn't it awful when you have to go out somewhere really soon and you know before you go out that you're definitely gonna need one.. but it's just not ready before you leave the house and then you don't have a chance to go for several hours.. ..awful.. Picture a driving lesson like that last friday! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted April 22, 2007 Eat lots of chewing gum, that's a nice laxative. Or... maybe a more radical method, but worth a thought nonetheless. Try and hold the poo in, thus perhaps doing the ole reverse psychology on your body, and then the poo will want to come screaming out of you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
