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Posted

aight,

i got up at 3 am on 4th july day. i now what you're thinking. E-A-R-L-Y, ivan. yes. that's pretty early, but, i'm still a kid at heart.

so i got up at 3 am and i immediately went to my gramma's room and begged her to git out of bed and come into the living room to start opening presents. she gave me a look like she was gonna burn a hole right throuh my face and i quietly backed away from her bed and went out to the living room by myself.

every 4th july she does this and i for one and sick and tired of it. she has no holiday spirit. and her boyfriends don't help either. it seems like every 4th july she has a new guy shacked up in bed with her when she wakes up. this time, thankfully, the guy was so drunk and passed out that he didn't wake when i went in to get gramma up.

so next i got out a knife and i started watching my dvds:

runaway bride

multiplicity

spy kids

etc.

after this it was like 6 am already so i got the dogs out into the yard and took a piss with them. and then i went back in to watch the independant day parade.

it was awesome.

while i was watching the tube and chewing on licorice i shook all of the presents around and figured out what all of them were.

i shook one too hard and it started to get wet and it fell apart in my hands and i had to throw it away. it was some shampoo from g-ma to me. yuck. better in the trash can than in my hair.

about this time lizzie and her rats got up and came into the living room.

and i have to say that it was much more enjoyable with-OUT them their. her kids are poorly behaved. a lot like my dog's. but worse. they alwasy talk back and they never wipe off their faces. they've always got some nasty shit covering their faces and hands. and since lizzie is a retard they wear a lot of like country style outfits. lizzie is a dumbass if you haven't figured that out already. i'm just dating her for the MONAY! ie 4th july day presents and what not~

so the kids were loud enough to wake up g-ma and company and then we all ate us up some cereal and bagels and then we sang two songs and then we opened presents.

i got:

1 ticket to see smash mouth

a new pair of glasses

a new pair of shoes

a lot of shirts and underwear and shit like that

and a waterbed which is WAY to small for my body.

 

over all, my 4th july sucked. aside from the smash mouth ticket i'd like to smash lizzie and g-ma's mouths in for giving me such crap presents.

 

but that's why i always save my present giving until the end. i open all the presents for me up real quick and then i go and get the ones i bought for everybody else out of my closet. i make a big deal out of it like its a tradition or some shit. i do this so if somebody gives me a crap present i can say i forgot to git them somthing by accident, because fuck them.

 

so after i opened up all my presents i just sat there pissed off about how i only got crap presents. and i just sat there for a long time and after all the presents had been opened they just kept sitting and waiting and not asking about my presents but looking at me and wondering when i would go to get them.

then gramma said some shit like 'i guess its time to go to lunch at gunther's then if that's all the presents?' so i said 'no wait... i have to go to my room for a minute before we do that.' so everybody smiled and giggled and i went to my room and went back to sleep. but before i got to sleep i made a sign that said

'fuck y'all for getting me shit presents. leave my ass alone. i hate all of yall. fuck off. good night bitches.'

and i taped the sign to a chair in my bedroom so they'd see it as soon as they came into my room.

so i got to sleep and i think i heard someone come in after about 15 minutes and then they went back out and everyone was yelling and then they left.

that was the best part of day.

so all in all i'd say it was worth it to get all them asses out of the house for a while.

Posted
If you don't want Spy Kids I'll have it.

 

sup evilmarray~

you got a deal. your serial number is -N2FUN000001 (thats a negative number but its still valid don't worry)

 

welcum abroad sailor

 

and I'm also giving you 3 fun-bucks to spend at future auctions here. I'm thinking of selling my car in this thread or something only avlieble to club members.

Posted

Your moaning that you got crap presents on a made-up-fake holiday (as the only time that america WAS independent was before the rest of thr world found it)?

 

You just seem like some spoilt kid...

 

In some way, im hoping they do all "fuck off" and leave you with nothing.

Posted
Your moaning that you got crap presents on a made-up-fake holiday (as the only time that america WAS independent was before the rest of thr world found it)?

 

You just seem like some spoilt kid...

 

In some way, im hoping they do all "fuck off" and leave you with nothing.

 

Wow. You said exactly what i didn't have the balls to say =D

Posted
'fuck y'all for getting me shit presents. leave my ass alone. i hate all of yall. fuck off. good night bitches.'

 

Spoilt idiot.

 

Bloody hell, in the UK there are only two days of each year when you get presents:

Your Birthday and Christmas.

 

We don't have Thanksgiving or Independence Day and all the other rediculous holidays you yanks have.

 

So be greatful you actually got something.

 

You didn't even bother giving your family anything.

 

You don't see parents acting like you when their kids get them rubbish presents.

Posted
in life there is no 'odd' only normal and what is right.

and my life is right for me right now.

 

Normal is what everyone else is, and you are not.

 

So, basically, "normal" and "odd" are different from person to persion. There is no "true" odd or normal, just individual opinions.

 

And i doubt most americans (even from their steriotypic reputation over here) are spoilt idiots.

 

Also, how can life be "right" if you still live with your "gramma" and are dating an idiot they you don't like, who has horrible kids?

Posted

man what the fuck you going on about! I only get presents for my birthday and chritsmas and I also live in the US. You get a waterbed and Smash mouth tickets for 4th of july, and your pissed at your family, damn what the fuck is your problem! If I get stuff I don't like I least still say Thanks or what not and play with it for a while. Damn man. You sound like an 11 year old.

Posted

all that stuff is sooo behind me now. everything has been cleared up and my life is back to smooth sailing. me and lizzie and my grandma are LIVIGN IT UP YALL! that's right. things are going so great. ITS SICK YALL!~ we just ate us up a bunch of them little fried lobster fuckers with the tiny hats! THAT SHIT WAS THE-BOMB.COM!~ L-OUT-Z!~

Posted

first of all i want to thank everyone whos made an effort here tonight. second of all i want to thank those of you for simply being here. thirdly i want to thank each and everyone of you for the many pms that ive recieved today in response to this thread. and fourth i want to say thanks to all of yall who actually read my entire post.

 

when you dont read my whole post you disrespect my poetry. and when you disrespect my poetry you disrespect yourself and god.

now many of you know that im a christian, so im not gonna get too personal here, but let me just say that if we met face to face you might not know i was christian with the things i would do to you for disrespecting my whole life like this.

 

im out.

peace.

Posted

The OP had my head spinning.

 

 

SPINNING.

 

-edit-

 

now many of you know that im a christian, so im not gonna get too personal here, but let me just say that if we met face to face you might not know i was christian with the things i would do to you for disrespecting my whole life like this.

 

Respect my belief or I'll hit you. Very Christian.

 

 

(cookie to whoever knows from which show that's from)

 

 

 

More on topic: what the fuck?

Posted
when you dont read my whole post you disrespect my poetry. and when you disrespect my poetry you disrespect yourself and god.

now many of you know that im a christian, so im not gonna get too personal here, but let me just say that if we met face to face you might not know i was christian with the things i would do to you for disrespecting my whole life like this.

 

First of all: WTF?? How can not reading an idiots tale disrespect the person reading it, or a fictional character for that matter.

 

Secondly: You are a christian, so, it means FA. I'm technically a christian. I'm also an athiest, also, if you are a "proper" christian, then you have already done enough to guarantee yourself a place in "hell"

Posted

Faith is difficult. It requires the belief in something that is not tangible or perceivable in any way. Sometimes when I am down in the dumps, I start to doubt the existenec of a higher power. These are the times when faith is most important. I shut my eyes, take off my clothes and say a prayer to Jesus Christ. He always answers by warming my heart and soothing my tired muscles with his tender, yet strong embrace. It feels like a back massage by warm ghost hands~

 

Love of Nintendo is difficult too. Several of my ex-friends at school have taken to "dissing" Nintendo by calling it "Nintenpoo" or "Pootendo" or "Peentendo". But worst of all they "diss" the games. The games are sacred territory. And this is where it hurts the most. Each game produced by Nintendo is lovingly created and crafted by leader Shigsky to spread the message of wholesomeness and purity and celebacy. He is absolutely vice-free and his strength and wisdom are unmatched by anyone I know, with the exception of my Youth Pastor Vance. So when I hear someone say "Nintendo sucks a witch's titty", I say "Nintendo's magnificence, talent and quality may not be perceivable but it is there". That's where faith takes over. And when I crank on "Super Mari Brothers" I feel the same warmth that I feel when Jesus smiles down upon me and I have no fear. Except it is Shigeru smiling down on me with no shirt on and a very hairy chest. It's no coincidence that Nintendo is a Christian game maker. Their power as a conduit for the Lord's Love has brought them international fame and recognition but still they stay true to themselves and the teachings of JC.

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