Random, abstract and often non-sequential thoughts and musings about various issues

[Pyxis]

Some people might think they are very different from everybody else, but they are ultimately doing the same things. What if somebody said the whole concept of music and fictional TV series/books was stupid? Rubbing against the grains of human nature.

Edited March 4, 2010 by Pyxis

[jayseven]

Everyone essentially is egotistical, self-righteous and pompous. Everyone believes, in their heart of hearts, that they are better than everyone else.

 

You are that boring, rubbish person to other people, too. Your relationships with your favourite people are as strong/good/stunning as they are because of the circumstances that go into them, including the continuous co-existence with other boring people, the distance between your habitats, your frequency of meeting, etc.

 

And stuff.

[chairdriver]

Everyone essentially is egotistical, self-righteous and pompous. Everyone believes, in their heart of hearts, that they are better than everyone else.

 

You are that boring, rubbish person to other people, too. Your relationships with your favourite people are as strong/good/stunning as they are because of the circumstances that go into them, including the continuous co-existence with other boring people, the distance between your habitats, your frequency of meeting, etc.

 

And stuff.

So essential.

 

All you ever do is reinforce your status as Lieutenant.

[Jimbob]

Everyone essentially is egotistical, self-righteous and pompous. Everyone believes, in their heart of hearts, that they are better than everyone else.

 

You are that boring, rubbish person to other people, too. Your relationships with your favourite people are as strong/good/stunning as they are because of the circumstances that go into them, including the continuous co-existence with other boring people, the distance between your habitats, your frequency of meeting, etc.

 

And stuff.

 

Righteo, that sounds like the typical person(s) i know.

[Paj!]

^ Is that a joke?

 

Also; I agree (with Jay).

[EEVILMURRAY]

I just need relief next to me, more than anything else in life.

Try sticking with one guy. It might help.

[chairdriver]

Try sticking with one guy. It might help.

 

[Eenuh]

So this thread is just for random thoughts right? If not, just delete this, whatever.

 

 

I hate how it sometimes feels like people take you for granted.

 

I'm turning old, my body is turning old, and it's scaring the shit out of me.

 

It feels like time is slowly slipping by and there's nothing I can do about it. There's so much I want to do but there's so many limitations as well.

 

I know that once I finish school, I will probably never see my friends again, meaning I'll end up alone again. Life always seems to turn out that way for me.

 

I want to do something meaningful in this world, but I think the most meaningful thing I could possibly do is adopt a child someday. Unless I find a cure for AIDS or cancer... but since I'm not a doctor that won't happen.

 

 

 

Sorry for the high level of emo-ness in this post.

[Pyxis]

Why would you want to adopt a baby instead of having your own? Babies are all about passing on your genetics and why would you want others to do this instead of yourself when they are such bad parents to begin with?

[Coolness Bears]

Random thoughts you say?

 

What happens if you get animals drunk? do they become hilarious or do they just keel over and die?

 

Because I want to buy a Barnhouse so I can watch a whole bunch of animals jut sway under the influence while listening to Jazz Music being played by a toothless oldman who is only wearing dungarees made entirely from spaghetti. But not dry spaghetti that's dull everyone has dry spaghetti clothing that is common as mud.

 

I'd have a cooked spaghetti dress for the oldman to wear. Actually I'd wear wet spaghetti it must be a weird feeling like swimming in a net of octopi or something. Just that general slimey feeling that people SAY they don't enjoy but we all know they really do.

 

I guess what all that amounts to is that I believe that when people are drunk they wouldn't mind being touched by an octopus/squid.

 

at the very least lightly stroked by a sea bass.

[jayseven]

Eenuh; the joy of age is in looking back at the past and seeing a better version of yourself. The trick of youth is to see yourself as a better version of you than any that will occur in the future! While you may think you are sagging and falling apart now, when it truly starts to happen (in 20 years time, at least) you will remember when you were the age you are now and be all remeniscing and shit.

 

While we weren't as broken yesterday, we were a lot more stupid. Being in a state of ill-repair now is compensated by our experience and our wisdom.

 

I remember an age when I felt cool, sexy, fit, popular, loved, etc... these days I struggle to be any one of the above at any one time, but I pull myself through it by believing, sincerely, that I am better than I was before.

 

So instead of focusing on the days I've wasted, I try to hone in on the days I have yet to encounter. The possibilities and potential that they offer means I can still be an even better person yet.

 

C_B; you are youth personified. While your musings are... Amusing, they culminate in little more than sporadia, and go against what eenuh is inquiring about. While I do generally encourage living in the moment, I decree that a certain amount of wit be sprinked on such thoughts; the understanding that what seems cool now will cease to entertain tomorrow will help filter the useful from the useless.

 

But then again, I advise you enjoy it while you still can.

 

My general random musings of the night;

 

Too many people assume that a dystipian existence is akin to that of a 1984 style oppressiveness, while in actual fact our current social inadequacies are much more aligned to that of Brave New World, where we are controlled by the perpeptual offerings of 'luxuries', of 'entertainment' and pleasure. While I can't say that I am immune to such lifestyles, I still am certain that I am at least more aware of how my life is being controlled, and I am very sure that questioning is better than accepting, no matter how simple the answer may be.

 

Gotbored, drew a picture.

[EEVILMURRAY]

http://uvtblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/ww-bitch-please.gif

You can post as many images as you want. Stop blowing a new guy every week and let one settle in your ring.

[Ashley]

Random thoughts you say?

 

What happens if you get animals drunk? do they become hilarious or do they just keel over and die?

 

[Eenuh]

Why would you want to adopt a baby instead of having your own? Babies are all about passing on your genetics and why would you want others to do this instead of yourself when they are such bad parents to begin with?

 

Just because you're adopting a kid doesn't mean you can't have any of your own either... Plus I'm not too fussed about having my own kids yet; pregnancy and giving birth scare me.

Also, bad parents? Do you think some people can help it they are born in a third world country where there's not enough food for their children and no real future? Or that some kids can help it they end up as orphans with no parents?

 

Eenuh; the joy of age is in looking back at the past and seeing a better version of yourself. The trick of youth is to see yourself as a better version of you than any that will occur in the future! While you may think you are sagging and falling apart now, when it truly starts to happen (in 20 years time, at least) you will remember when you were the age you are now and be all remeniscing and shit.

 

While we weren't as broken yesterday, we were a lot more stupid. Being in a state of ill-repair now is compensated by our experience and our wisdom.

 

I remember an age when I felt cool, sexy, fit, popular, loved, etc... these days I struggle to be any one of the above at any one time, but I pull myself through it by believing, sincerely, that I am better than I was before.

 

So instead of focusing on the days I've wasted, I try to hone in on the days I have yet to encounter. The possibilities and potential that they offer means I can still be an even better person yet.

 

The thing is I don't feel like I really got to enjoy my youth while I still had it. During my entire time in secondary school and the few years after that, -nothing- happened in my life. The few friends I had didn't like to do the things I liked to do, resulting in nothing ever happening. And the same is happening now, as I only have 3 friends who I rarely see/who don't live close.

 

I'm at that age where people tell you to start thinking about your future, your job, your partner etc, and I just don't feel ready for that yet. I have a lot of things to catch up on but I'm not sure if that's still going to happen or not. Sorry this doesn't make sense. Basically I don't want to become a responsible adult yet.

[Pyxis]

Just because you're adopting a kid doesn't mean you can't have any of your own either... Plus I'm not too fussed about having my own kids yet; pregnancy and giving birth scare me.

Also, bad parents? Do you think some people can help it they are born in a third world country where there's not enough food for their children and no real future? Or that some kids can help it they end up as orphans with no parents?

 

I don't think the feelings of the babies are important. But as far as feelings go, I'd imagine that a guy would be much more interested in whether or not his children were related to him because in nature, it is usually the males competing for the opportunity to reproduce, while the female just gets the winner's sperm pumped into her and doesn't really need to be as emotionally driven by it as the male. In the human world, men are also the ones doing the chasing (just look at all those Indian men in those chat rooms asking for c2c). The child might also not be as emotionally attached to you and leave you in search of their real parents once they've grown up. It's incredibly expensive to raise a child (£186,000!) and I'd rather invest that money into my own child's future, by buying a house or something so that they could have a comfortable life and a family of their own.

 

If there isn't enough food for people, then they shouldn't be having children. Some animals have as many children as possible, knowing fair well that all but one or more of them will starve to death depending on how much food there is. If some humans want to behave like this, then their babies starving to death is just a fact of life and the outcome of a bad season. It would be a mistake to save those starving babies, just like how it would be a mistake to go into a birds nest, take all the starving chicks, rear them to adulthood and then release them back into the wild. Nature will take care of people's mistakes if they don't want to.

 

I bet most orphaned babies are just unwanted mistakes by women who are too selfish to abort them in the first place. If you make a market for unwanted babies, then you will make more and more women think it will be fine to put their babies up for adoption. If you don't make it a possibility, then it wont be a possibility and there would be less orphans and you've saved yourself from having to adopt in the first place. People would think more before they have unprotected sex! "Is this a stable relationship? Am I old enough? Does he have AIDS? Is my stomach rumbling from hunger?" Although I sound incredibly uncaring, I think this is the most caring thing to do.

[Ashley]

I know that once I finish school, I will probably never see my friends again, meaning I'll end up alone again. Life always seems to turn out that way for me.

 

I want to do something meaningful in this world, but I think the most meaningful thing I could possibly do is adopt a child someday. Unless I find a cure for AIDS or cancer... but since I'm not a doctor that won't happen.

 

1) Move to England and have fun times with us! And maybe Jim.

 

2) Your work has inspired me and made me happier when I've been down. Thus you are not meaningless! You make my dreams come true the world a more bearable place

 

Actually random musing: at what age do old ladies stop and think "you know what, I'd really like a jumper with dogs on"?

Edited March 6, 2010 by Ashley

[Raining_again]

Just because you're adopting a kid doesn't mean you can't have any of your own either... Plus I'm not too fussed about having my own kids yet; pregnancy and giving birth scare me.

Also, bad parents? Do you think some people can help it they are born in a third world country where there's not enough food for their children and no real future? Or that some kids can help it they end up as orphans with no parents?

 

 

 

The thing is I don't feel like I really got to enjoy my youth while I still had it. During my entire time in secondary school and the few years after that, -nothing- happened in my life. The few friends I had didn't like to do the things I liked to do, resulting in nothing ever happening. And the same is happening now, as I only have 3 friends who I rarely see/who don't live close.

 

I'm at that age where people tell you to start thinking about your future, your job, your partner etc, and I just don't feel ready for that yet. I have a lot of things to catch up on but I'm not sure if that's still going to happen or not. Sorry this doesn't make sense. Basically I don't want to become a responsible adult yet.

 

Maybe try learning to drive, it gives you buckets of independance, and you can travel to see people. I wouldn't be so hard on yourself, before you know it the time will come.

[Jonnas]

The child might also not be as emotionally attached to you and leave you in search of their real parents once they've grown up. It's incredibly expensive to raise a child (£186,000!) and I'd rather invest that money into my own child's future, by buying a house or something so that they could have a comfortable life and a family of their own.

 

The risk of a child leaving you is still there, even if it's your biological son/daughter. If a child you adopted as a baby uses that as a pretext for leaving you, it probably would've done the same thing even if it wasn't adopted.

 

As for prefering to spend money on your child instead of an adopted one... I'd think you'd prefer to spend it on the one you raised, regardless of origin.

In fact, when deciding wether you should adopt a child or have your own, money is a moot point in making that decision.

 

If there isn't enough food for people, then they shouldn't be having children.

 

Lack of food/money may be a question of circumstance. What if a couple believes they have enough money to raise a child, and shortly after it being born, they lose a significant portion of monetary income (say, one or both of the parents dies)?

 

I bet most orphaned babies are just unwanted mistakes by women who are too selfish to abort them in the first place. If you make a market for unwanted babies, then you will make more and more women think it will be fine to put their babies up for adoption. If you don't make it a possibility, then it wont be a possibility and there would be less orphans and you've saved yourself from having to adopt in the first place. People would think more before they have unprotected sex! "Is this a stable relationship? Am I old enough? Does he have AIDS? Is my stomach rumbling from hunger?" Although I sound incredibly uncaring, I think this is the most caring thing to do.

 

People will continue to make pregnancy mistakes and having unwanted babies wether or not there are couples looking for adoption. This isn't an industry, orphanages exist because it keeps happening.

 

As for "being selfish to abort", that's a more complicated issue. Abortion is not a decision that's easy to make. Ethical issues still exist around the issue, and it can lead to psychological trauma. Not to mention that it's illegal in some countries.

Edited March 6, 2010 by Jonnas

[jayseven]

 

The thing is I don't feel like I really got to enjoy my youth while I still had it. During my entire time in secondary school and the few years after that, -nothing- happened in my life. The few friends I had didn't like to do the things I liked to do, resulting in nothing ever happening. And the same is happening now, as I only have 3 friends who I rarely see/who don't live close.

 

I'm at that age where people tell you to start thinking about your future, your job, your partner etc, and I just don't feel ready for that yet. I have a lot of things to catch up on but I'm not sure if that's still going to happen or not. Sorry this doesn't make sense. Basically I don't want to become a responsible adult yet.

 

If you didn't enjoy your youth then no biggie. Enjoy your adulthood! You get more freedom, you have more money, you can ride on all the rollercoasters, have sex, drink, all without that sense of idiotic 'innocence' - the blinkered belief in the tooth fairy, in your parents being perfect, and so on.

 

Change is the hardest thing to accept, even though you are constantly changing day by day without really noticing it. Comparing yourself to wherever you were, whoever you were last year/5 years ago/10 years ago only leaves you looking at the greener patches of grass rather than the truth.

 

You're still young, too! You're not a decrepid old dragon scowling at them young'uns who whizz past you or anything.

 

Being a responsible adult is actually quite a forgiving process, if my route to being a Grown Up is anything to go by. You can and will make mistakes, just as everyone who has ever told you how you should live your life have done themselves. They are giving you 'advice' based on their own mistakes, and while they say what they say because they care, they can still make mistakes in their wise old age.

 

As for other people 'doing more' and 'being better' and whatever - you are famous for downrating yourself, for comparing any of your strengths exclusively only to people who are stronger than you. You don't need hundreds of friends. If you want more then there are people out there - social clubs are an excellent way to find some. Plus the interactive universe suggests that, actually, you have dozens of friends on here.

 

I wouldn't say I have a 'best friend' -- someone who loves to do everything I love to do and vice-versa. But I have others who share the odd common interest, and in general friendship is like any relationship - compromise needs to be made, and general awareness of other thinking feeling minds than yours is a must.

 

Ashley's right in that - you should finish your course then simply come live in england, start from scratch, build your own castle of dreams, accept your own power to mould your life, etc etc.

 

Long post, missed a few points. The people who are grown ups firsts are the ones who miss out on youth. Don't knock yourself, kid.

[EEVILMURRAY]

I'm sorry Jay. I shaved off my potential beard.

 

... Someday, we will walk in the valley together with amazing facial hair.

[ReZourceman]

[Dannyboy-the-Dane]

Eenuh, I think ReZ is trying to communicate that you should adopt the same attitude of self-consciousness and self-esteem as that anteater. That, or he might just be trying to be funny again.

[ReZourceman]

This is a bit deep for me.

[Paj!]

I don't feel like a person. I feel like a big ambiguous thing that is incapable of integrating into how humans behave and act in modern society. I feel like I'm faking it. I have lots of good friends, but around most I have a guard up. Although the guard is more like this big wall that portects whatever is inside but also just tells everyone else that there's "nothing to see here".

 

I feel like a big vessel with a brain and intelligence within it somewhere, rather than a brain/intelligence controlling a body. I think/am convinced I'm dying/falling apart or something, and I'm so scared of death. But I don't bother to actually inquire as to whether I am ill or whatever. When I heard the song "Good That Won't Come Out" by Rilo Kiley, I'd never heard a song that actually described so acturately how feel, including this element.

I do this thing where I think I'm real sick

But I won't go to the doctor to find out about it

Cause they make you sit real still in a real small space

While they chart up your insides and put them on display

They'd see all of it, all of me, all of it, all of me, all of the good that won't come out.

As a being, I put things off/procrastinate for no reason other than for the sake of ease. In work and stuff I rarely do it ahead of time unless I really enjoy it, as a minor (universal really) example (we all do to some extent), but then I also think that if things aren't said or looked into it means they won't quite be real.

 

I have more on my mind than anyone knows, and while the real urge and need to make a change is growing within me, at the same time I feel like I'm just turning more and more into this mass of disintegrating, impartial flesh who is neither here nor there. Everytime I leave my house, the action of doing so is like...bathed in criticism and thinking about what other people on the street would think of me and how I appear (or at least more so than I may appear, I don't bother with appearance really, fashion wise or anything. Though I've decided this is because I feel defeated by my own feelings of inadequecy/formless face and body and so I don't bother). The way other people just.."are", I don't feel that way. I just don't feel like a tangible being, I feel amorphous, and so in everything I do, I have thoughts firing around the back of my head throughout.

 

I know I've mentioned on here before that while art is what I want to do and I'm so inspired by art, music and literatrue, I never felt I could express myself through it properly. With my new love of film, this feeling is subsiding slightly. But then I think that feeling was attached to everything that's going on in my head that no one can see but I wanted to somehow get across , but then was sabotaged by own fears of inadequacy or what the result is "not being right".

 

I'm scared I'll die and have done nothing (I know, everyone is...). I still can't face the concept of my own lack of existence. But that's not what's pressing on my mind as much at the moment (for once!).

 

I just feel I'm at a crux in something...I know various things I could do at this point, the act of doing them would make me more happy, but then I'm unsure of what happens after that as my head wil still be here. (e.g the example I gave of me feeling like I'm dying/am ill but not wanting to investigate so it doesn't seem real)

 

 

--

 

That was unplanned.

[chairdriver]

I have lots of good friends, but around most I have a guard up. Although the guard is more like this big wall that portects whatever is inside but also just tells everyone else that there's "nothing to see here".

 

I have the same thing. I can only be myself around people who I share an empathy with (that's a really flawed term, having actually realised what empathy is/actually means, but I've always said it to describe said people traditionally, so I'll say it for the sentimentally). I feel really claustrophobic around people I feel will judge me.

 

Comes back to my fantasy about rings*. Surround me with people I have empathy with.

 

 

"around people I feel will judge me" - it's not even that - I'm more than comfortable with judgement if it's by a stunning - it's just certain people I feel uncomfortable around, usually for unknown reasons.

 

 

I feel at uni its far more easy to surround yourself in people from your same Coffee Homeground - I can talk to people alot more at uni, because it feels I've chosen them as friends, where before I was friends with people more through circumstance (obvs not referring to you, referring to elsewise shites). I can say meaningful things about the way I'm feeling / my life, and they'll welcome it all.

 

 

Take me back to my Homeground, where I'll clear a patch of land, whilst you fetch health-giving water, and we'll build an empathic commune.

 

 

*lol at anal innuendo.

Edited March 7, 2010 by chairdriver