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The Bard

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Everything posted by The Bard

  1. Wait...so the only reason you play Mario Kart is so you can hike up an imaginary number in the corner of your screen? That's tragic dude, let it go. Nobody is going to see or care about your race points so why don't you just imagine they're like 10,000 or something and keep playing the damn game?
  2. That specifically is really weird when you wake up next to your girlfriend
  3. I have random dreams now and then that I just completely forget about half an hour after waking up, in the way that I never forget things that happen to me during the day. It's kind of fucked up how there's like a half life to dream memory. I do get two frequently recurring dreams though, where the template or "general narrative" is the same but the people involved might change. The first kind is where it's just the disembodied head of some random celebrity spinning in a weird locale vaguely related to something they're known for, and the whole time they just say the same thing over and over. A few years ago it was Elijah Wood's head floating through lush verdure spinning while spitting fireballs and saying "You're late" repeatedly. Recently it was Scott Bakula floating through the field of stars screensaver from windows 95 saying "Engage" again and again and on and on. The second dream takes place at school a week before an exam where I've forgotten to attend classes that entire year for a subject and have a week to catch up. There are other details in this one that I'll spare you, but I've had it maybe a fifty times since my A levels. I don't really know what's up with it and I suspect it's probably some sort of grievous mental illness that will one day result in the actual disembodied head of one of my teachers in the basement. I got the impression of a close up video shoot of it while it spins slowly on a platform. Like a Lamborghini. Maybe your subconscious is telling you to have sex on a PS2. You might need to find an appropriately sized sex partner. I had a dream like that recently though, but I just went and bought a Dreamcast, and I was so happy. Then I woke up and wanted a Dreamcast. Does anyone ever get that thing where you're left with the residual emotions of the dream for the entire day? Anyway I guess for me it was just nostalgia for the fact that I've never wanted a console as much as I wanted a Dreamcast back in 1999. Had that proper little kid longing for it where I'd just sit staring at the Argos catalog all day as if that would magic it into my living room.
  4. Yup played Guacamelee and felt my Metroid bone tingle. You know which bone I mean. Very charming game, but me being an "I'm only happy when it rains" type of person I want something with a more brooding atmosphere. Haven't gotten too far into The Swapper yet but it's super good from what I've played. Not sure if Metroid though. I also heard the Transformers game that came out a few years ago (Fall of Cybertron...maybe?) was supposed to be a legitimately fantastic game. Was never into the show/ toys way back when though so I didn't get it.
  5. I still have flashbacks of getting off the bus home so we could look for Zell and wonder how the fuck I did something that out of character. But then I remember that I was the one forcing Jager and Sambuca on him all night while telling him to make a move on a girl I knew full well is gay. So yeah, you slept because you knew SS Karma wasn't looking to lodge itself in your colon.
  6. That was a good night, the aftermath of aforementioned asian bikini party at Thai Sq where we kept forcing Zell to down Sambuca shots. Then he just disappeared. The hunt for Zell kept @Charlie und ich out on the streets until 7am. It was a lot of fun.
  7. I do that with my food. But by the time I get to the steak I'm already full as fuck from all the gross ass boiled carrots and caramelised onions. Don't do that with AC4 Flink.
  8. I've heard good things about that. Will give it a try. I haven't had time to play anything avant garde recently so I just wrote a paragraph about the opening minute of Half Life 2.
  9. Dude, you should have played AC4 first. So much better.
  10. The WvW stuff you mention is exactly what puts me off going back even to something like Planetside 2. It's so impossible to make a dent in any objective by yourself, so ironically it turns into a standard team deathmatch scenario rather than the sprawling faction war it's supposed to be. If only we could get an N-E outfit together
  11. I've gotten to the age where I've heard enough shitty game names that I just do a madlib whenever referring to one and just expect people to get what I'm saying. Anyway, no Metroid, no sale bitchezzzz.
  12. Does anyone have the lowdown on whether Hercules is as shit as I suspect it might be? I kind of want to see it. Really hype on Boyhood doe, Before Midnight, Sunrise and Sunset were such great films.
  13. @Daft it's alright I was just angry breathing into the mic anyway. You were at the top of the leaderboard a bunch for someone who spends a lot of time dancing at capture points. I'm still getting used to using a controller again. It feels like I'm trying to adjust the yaw on the titanic every time I want to turn around and shoot someone. @drahkon is Rogue Galaxy anything like Metroid?
  14. Is there enough to do to justify £19.00 for someone who hasn't ever played an MMO? Like, other than loot grinds and fetch quests?
  15. C'mon man, stop shooting down my hairbrained theories, I need something explain why I'm so shit at it.
  16. Yeah but there are enough different types of weapons that balancing is naturally going to be a problem. Obvs that's going to be the most difficult thing for Bungie to get right with the mp, but it's fine since that's not really the focus of the game.
  17. The worst thing about PvP is shitty weapons balancing. You can bring any loot you picked up into the game and there's enough granularity in the weapons to leave you at a disadvantage if someone has a better rifle than you. I assume they even out the damage any weapon does when it goes into multiplayer (if they don't then that's even more fucked) but it's still not fantastic. It feels enough like Halo to make me want to play that instead because it's definitely a superior PvP experience.
  18. This time I'll stay at the arcade instead of insisting that we go to a bikini party. I'm too old for the fallout that comes with that shit. Dude, you can't be serious about missing the meet for fucking cricket. Come and we'll watch it at the pub with @Goron_3
  19. Thinking about applying for the junior writer position at Rock Paper Shotgun. It's come at such a shit time though with my end of year assignments due in real soon.
  20. I'd love to learn how to play but it seems really intimidating mostly from the stories you get of VOIP harrassment by nonplussed teammates.
  21. Play Wipeout 2048 on the other hand...
  22. 60fps not only looks smoother but plays smoother because the game only pulls instructions from a controller every time a new frame is rendered. If twice as many frames are being rendered, controlling the game will feel twice as responsive and immediate since the game is polling the controller twice as many times. At the same time, 30fps has a more filmic weight to it. Films run at 24fps. It gives movement a weighty inertia, and watching films shot in 60fps is just fucking weird because movement looks far too fluid (you'll know what I mean if you've seen Public Enemies). For reference compare MGS5: Ground Zeroes to Killzone. Certain games are better in 60fps (F-Zero, First Person Shooters) others that are more cinematic rather than twitch heavy gameplay wise are fine with 30.
  23. Took a geography trip there for school to do a survey on the demographics, and literally everyone I surveyed in the Town Centre had a house worth over £400,000. Meanwhile over in Stockpoooert we were rubbing dirty pennies together for warmth. On topic; I'd love to not be in London because the climate is terrible and nothing is fun unless you're absolutely trashed or incredibly wealthy. But having no marketable skillz I'm not likely to leave any time soon. Would like to go to San Francisco. Or Seattle.
  24. I donno. I think to be qualified to talk about games and not sound like a time capsule from 1993 you need to play more than Nintendo. Ostensibly you are on this forum to talk about videogames (not necessarily the case), and there's just so little to say about Nintendo these days if it doesn't focus on the business side of things. If they had any ability to learn from their contemporaries we might actually talk about the damn games once in a while instead of bashing them for chilling out under yonder rock in Kyoto. In other words, what @Shorty said.
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