Posted October 12, 2006 So with my friend becoming pregnant it got me thinking, im 19 and most of my friends are either married, engaged, pregnant, or already have kids. Most of them are less than a year older than me, only one isn't (one of the engaged ones). So I've been thinking about this; settling down and all that. A while back I was talking with the married guy and he said something along the lines of "if im happy to rent a DVD and watch it with my wife what's wrong with that?" and nothing, obviously, but thats not who I want to be. I don't plan to do any of those "grown up" things for a good 10 years or so, I want to go through uni and enjoy my young adult life and career and such. Anyway, just though we could all talk about growing up and entering the big bad world and such. When/if you plan to get married and/or have kids. And for those who already have (Tim, Schpicles and Odwin spring to mind), what made you decide the time was right etc? Or maybe this thread will descend into spam, knowing how it goes around here, and while it would be ironic, don't. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Take your time, why rush, that sea of fish ain't going anywhere. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I turn 19 saturday and I can't see myself getting married in the future. First, I've been single for a lot of time, second, I just need time for myself I simply can't think of having to commit of devoting your whole time to someone else. Of course that if I love someone and I want to live with her, I'll do it, but, having kids? Don't think so really. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I would like to go out with a virgin, get married at 26-27, have kids 29-30. There probably aint that many virgins in Japan, but there are many in Poland Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Having stuff early like that means losing a lot of your life. The ability to do what you want without the hampering of a baby behind you. I'm 22 and yet to have a girlfriend or do anything sexual. I am busy doing and enjoying other things I want to do. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I don't see the need of having kids at the age of 20. A friend of mine, had her first when she was 16, she was actually happy with it, it was kinda of a major objective in her life, a way for her to feel accomplished after the failures of her life. Edit: Personaly I don't think much about it, these kind of things aren't supposed to be planed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I am 23 and in a relationship and have been for 9 months now, I have no intention of settling down or thinking about having kids till at least around the age of 30, there is a whole world out there I have yet to see and I dont wont things to get in the way really. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I've been with someone for 6 years, you don't have to be grown up just because your with someone. By the way im only 22 so do the math. We have fun all the time. I guess im just lucky but I wouldn't have it any other way. No kids though, just the two of us. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I'd kill myself before all of that shit, maybe i'll change.. but I see that as all very boring. Mortgages, debt.. slave to your job. Working a year for 2 weeks in the sun. Why bother? I couldn't handle that.. and what for? For us to end up with bugger all pension because we haven't been able to save.. living in a miserable cold flat. I am a glass half empty kinda guy.. but that all seems a bit of a waste. Why not just enjoy the first 30 years to the max. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I personally would've a thought that 19 was somewhat too young to be thinking about stuff like marriage and settling down. At the moment I don't have a plan or anything. I mean, I'm only 19. Though it's never struck me as an entirely concious decision that a person makes. It sounds like the sort of thing that happens as you go along almost, and then you'll reach a fork in the road and then you finally decide to take the next leap. I really do think 19 is far too young to think about things like this though. Big chunk of life to that needs to be enjoyed first. It would be like just rushing through the next Zelda game, even though you know you'll only ever get to play it through once. Madness. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 None of those things are for me. Not if I want to live out my dream lifestyle as a filthy drifter travelling around the world. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Having stuff early like that means losing a lot of your life. The ability to do what you want without the hampering of a baby behind you. My friend who is 20 with a 2 year old (a fucking awesome 2 year old I may add) said how she sees it as when her child is 18, she'll be 36 and she can be living life then. Everyones always saying you're as young as you feel, life begins at 40 etc, so I can see her reasoning. Personally I prefer my friends having kids that I can spoil, play with and then give back once they become annoying or smelly. (And im aware babies and marriage are not a signifier of grown up life, but people often link them, its a social standard) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 i'm engaged, hoping to get the wedding planned for 2008 at the earliest but I've got finacial matters to sort out first plus other complicated things that most here already know about. (if you don't go to my youtube channel (click my sig) and look for my vid "I Believe...") I had thought i'd never want to marry and have a family EVER, till i meet my now fiancé, after that my outlook on my future changed Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Ash thats how I feel. Some of my friends are getting married others are having kid. Even my reletives of the same age group, 18-23, have kids, hell my cousin age 19 had a kid with his GF more than two years ago, now he has 3. But my siblings and I, I'm the oldest, just somtimes laugh and think how sad it kind of really is that they didn't plan on kids. And now they basicly have no life cause they have to work dead end jobs to support their spouse and kids. I told my brother, he turns 18 in Dec, why have kids now I have better things to waste my money. He laughed and said how true that was. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Well I know I'd rather do stuff now when my body is nice and young, rather then do stuff later when it's all starting to fall apart. Don't think I'll ever have a partner or kids the way i'm going *Looks at pile of games he must finish off* >.< Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Well I know I'd rather do stuff now when my body is nice and young, rather then do stuff later when it's all starting to fall apart. Don't think I'll ever have a partner or kids the way i'm going *Looks at pile of games he must finish off* >.< Now there's a sentiment I can empathise with. *"Busies" himself with completing Resi 4. AGAIN.* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 If Jessica Alba asked me to marry her I'd do it though. Right in the minute. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 I'm quite happy settling down with the right person, and I think I might have found them; Aimless, not Restless. Kids, well... When I choose someone to spend the rest of my life with, I would do it for that reason: I want to be with them. I wouldn't want children taking that away from me straight away; kids are demanding, disruptive, and, in my opinion, damaging when had too early. It isn't that I never want to start a family, but I'm a firm believer in parents only birthing new life when theirs is ready. Bringing a child into the world can be either the most selfish or selfless thing you'll ever do, and I think you have to be sure which will hold true before you make any decisions. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Blimey, I don't know anyone my age who's engaged, married or has kids. To me it just seems daft at this age to do something like that, I just see it more as a burden then a pleasure. I don't want the same thing day in, day out, it just seems a rather dull existance. Much rather have chaos and something new everyday. Nope, I still feel like I'm 16 and so am happy just cruising along in immaturity doing daft new things for the time being. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 12, 2006 Im 23 and have no intention of settling down yet. Maybe in a few years time like 30, yes i think 30 would be a nice age to settle down...wife, house then kids....but now no way im too young for that.... Ive had a few serious relationships and im sure if another came along i would be quite content with whoever she may be but to settle down.... no way not yet, your 20's are the best days of your life. Well mine have been so far anyway. If you're with someone you love and you wanna be with then fair enough but still why rush it? there is no need to settle down if you are happy the way things are going. Moving in together is a big step and is a big cause of many relationships breaking down. My mates are slowly dropping like flies....yes oli1983uk im looking at you. Enjoy growing up and partying a bit more before even thinking of the whole settling down. (if i meet the girl of my dreams tomorrow and settle down straight away i will take back all what i have said :p) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2006 I'd rather spend money on me and my partner rather than little bastard kids... not to mention i hate the little shits. GOD DAMN THEM. *breathes* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2006 Im 23 and have no intention of settling down yet. Maybe in a few years time like 30, yes i think 30 would be a nice age to settle down...wife, house then kids....but now no way im too young for that.... Ive had a few serious relationships and im sure if another came along i would be quite content with whoever she may be but to settle down.... no way not yet, your 20's are the best days of your life. Well mine have been so far anyway. If you're with someone you love and you wanna be with then fair enough but still why rush it? there is no need to settle down if you are happy the way things are going. Moving in together is a big step and is a big cause of many relationships breaking down. My mates are slowly dropping like flies....yes oli1983uk im looking at you. Enjoy growing up and partying a bit more before even thinking of the whole settling down. (if i meet the girl of my dreams tomorrow and settle down straight away i will take back all what i have said :p) what u mean me! I still see you and love you! your the one with many love interests and will do anything for them. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2006 Blimey, I don't know anyone my age who's engaged, married or has kids. Lucky you, every time I go into the town where I live I seem to see somebody else who I went to school with, with a kid. It makes me laugh though, how they've ruined their lives. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2006 I'd rather spend money on me and my partner rather than little bastard kids... not to mention i hate the little shits. GOD DAMN THEM. *breathes* to easy. you know i'm joking Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted October 13, 2006 If I ever get to the exact same moment where a prick looking disgruntled was cause for using him twice in my signature then I shall most certainly consider settling down and wasting time over my future.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
