Looking back on Pokémon Starters (Paldea - Gen 9)

[Jonnas]

I really like Fennekin's line. That's an unconventional design for a fox creature of any kind, and it works really well. Not sure why Braixen is more popular than Delphox, but I like them both. Really cool witch, and excellent addition to Pokkén.

Froakie's... Well, Greninja's line really, is pretty cool on its own as well. Sure, Smash Bros. exposed Greninja a lot, but it's a legitimately great design. Unfortunately for it, I like witches better than Ninja Plus, the existence of Ash-Greninja lowers the entire species' score.

Chespin's line is decent. I don't really like Chesnaught's white colour, though, makes it look needlessly mechanical (when they already have a shell/shield, no less), and it's just garish, really clashes with the light green (the colour scheme that Chespin and Quilladin had going was perfectly fine, don't know why they would change it at the end)

Overall, a pretty strong generation when it comes to starters. Chesnaught alone is better than the Gen V starters.

[Glen-i]

Generation 7 consists of Sun, Moon, Ultra Sun, and Ultra Moon, and all of them take place in Alola. This is a region that's based on Hawaii. Yes, there is a big snowy mountain on Alola, best not think about it.

  

Rowlet (ROW-let), being an owl, has Flying type as a second type. It's a good thing that Ice attacks aren't common at the start of the game. Speaking of the start, this game doesn't actually have gyms. It has Island Trials which function somewhat similarly. Rowlet performs the best of the three starters in that early game.

Dartrix (DAR-trix) isn't as round as Rowlet, so why even bother!?

If anyone tries to tell you that Decidueye (deh-SIH-joo-eye) is the most popular Gen 7 starter, disregard everything they say, because they are either lying, or completely ignorant.
Why do I bring this up? No real reason, but as far as I can see, Decidueye fans are some of the most bitter Pokémon fans out there. A certain other starter here just became far more prolific, and they're super salty about it. It's definitely not the least popular, at least.

Anyway, Decidueye is a weird final starter evolution. Rowlet and Dartrix are Grass/Flying, but despite already having a second type, Decidueye is Grass/Ghost, a very cool type combination. Anyway, I know I said Gen 6 was the start of final starter evolutions having a theme, but I'm not entirely certain what the theme is here, if there even is one. Gen 8 and 9 would be more clear about it. Decidueye is obviously an archer.
Decidueye's signature move is "Spirit Shackle", an 80 power physical Ghost attack that also prevents the opponent from switching out while Decidueye is in battle. Pretty good!

But well, Decidueye is... to be blunt, not good. It's got a mostly even spread of stats, which is normally not a good thing in Pokémon. Unfortunately, it's speed and defense stat didn't get the message, being a lot lower then the rest. It just doesn't do anything well because it spreads itself too thin.

Decidueye's biggest claim to fame outside of the main games is that it was the sole new character (Not counting DLC) for the Switch version of Pokkén Tournament. Unlike most Pokémon in that game, I think Decidueye actually comes off looking quite good there.

Even if the wings are a bit too bright...

Anyway, more on that Pokémon in a future post.

  

Litten (LIT-n) is probably the most uninteresting starter Pokémon, design-wise. It's just a cat with odd colours! Didn't stop it being far and away the most popular of the three starters when they were initially revealed. Some people are just boring, I guess? Seriously, I looked at the Pokédex entries, and there is nothing interesting about it other then "It breathes fire".

Anyway, Litten has a rough time in the early game of Sun/Moon, it's effective against none of them and weak against the second Island Trial.

Torracat (TOR-ruh-cat) has a bell made of fire on it's neck, so it's already more interesting then Litten. But it's still a middle evolution, so eh...

And now for the Pokémon @BowserBasher was waiting for.

Incineroar (in-SIN-uh-roar) is easily the most divisive Pokémon of all time. And if I'm right... someone inadvertently proved this point beautifully on the previous page.

On 15/03/2024 at 9:52 AM, Cube said:

Also, you haven't even gotten to what is by far the worst case of a middle evolution to final evolution of a starter Pokémon. I used an Everstone for that one to make sure it never reached its final evolution.

Boy, I'm gonna look really silly if that isn't the Pokémon he's referring to...

Incineroar is a Pokémon that revolves around wrestling. Specifically, the more performative kind of wrestling you'd see in WWE and such. It likes to show off, and has swapped the lame bell for a kick-ass fire belt. That said, it's great with kids. This is the starter Pokémon you want if you need it to babysit.

Incineroar's divisive reception began before Sun/Moon even came out! As some concept art of it was leaked beforehand. And is probably why Cube elected to use an Everstone, despite the fact it was never officially shown.

Incineroar, the ultimate in boiling kettles.

Quite a bit of outcry when this was shown. There's a lot of people who just inherently dislike bipedal Pokémon, so Litten evolving into this was an immediate red rag to them.
I will never understand why some people hate bipedal Pokémon so much...
You see, I look at that picture of Incineroar slamming a table into Pikachu's face, and it cements Incineroar as an absolutely amazing Pokémon to me! I swear, some people hate fun.
People were also despairing at Incineroar being Fire/Fighting. They were wrong, mind you, Incineroar is actually Fire/Dark. That's what you get for making assumptions.

Incineroar's signature move is "Darkest Lariat", an 85 power, physical Dark attack that ignores any stat changes the opponent has. The secondary effect isn't all that, but it's the strongest Dark move Incineroar can learn, so it's still good.

Incineroar is an absolutely amazing Pokémon in battles. It has a ridiculous amount of moves, which means it can fulfill all sorts of roles, and it has the stats to back it up. This makes it a Pokémon that has sort of dominated the Doubles competitive scene because it's impossible to tell what kind of role it's fulfilling, making it a dangerous Pokémon to predict.
And even better! Incineroar gets "Intimidate" as it's Hidden Ability! Intimidate lowers the attack stat of the opposing Pokémon whenever it enters battle and is the bane of every VGC battler.
Blaziken may do one trick extremely well, but Incineroar can comfortably fit in any team you make. It is easily the second best starter of all time competitively, and it's not even close.

Anyway, I'm not the only one who thinks Incineroar is great...

Incineroar is the latest Pokémon character to be added to Smash Bros. Weirdly enough, it was revealed in a trailer alongside Ken from Street Fighter. I don't think I would want to be the guy who had to tell Capcom that "We're gonna show a trailer where Ken gets upstaged and utterly wrecked by some kind of wrestling tiger."

Masahiro Sakurai has gone on record saying that the Pokémon choices he had for Smash Ultimate were Decidueye or Incineroar, and he went with Incineroar because Smash didn't have a wrestling based character. This is the reason Decidueye fans are bitter, in case you didn't realise.
Even in Smash though, Incineroar is weird. It's the only Pokémon that has their shiny colouration as a costume option (Why every Pokémon character doesn't have that baffles me), and it's Side Special is a completely made up move.
You see, every Pokémon's Specials in Smash are based on an attack they can learn in the actual games. Incineroar's Side Special consists of Incineroar Irish Whipping his target into conveniently appearing wrestling ring ropes before hitting them with a clothesline, assuming you get the surprisingly difficult timing. Smash calls it "Alolan Whip", and it doesn't exist in any Pokémon game! Also, Incineroar has the most personality out of any starter Pokémon, and Smash really leans into that with the animations. Seriously, it's facial expressions are wild!

  

Sometimes, when starter Pokémon are revealed, you can just tell which one is going to be the unpopular one. Sorry, Popplio (POP-lee-oh), people just couldn't get past the nose.
Yes, really. That's the reason. I'm not even joking. It's so pathetic and petty.
It's pretty good in the opening game. Pity it all goes downhill from here.

Brionne (bree-AHN) is... Well you get the gist with middle evolutions by now.

Primarina's (PREE-muh-REE-nuh) very much based on an opera singer, which makes me think that the theme with Gen 7 starters is various forms of entertainment, but Decidueye makes me feel that might be wrong. Anyway, Primarina is Water/Fairy. The Fairy type was introduced in Gen 6, as a way to keep really strong types in check. But this just means that Fairy Pokémon are the new overpowered type. Unfortunately, it doesn't save Primarina from being anything other then mediocre.
The signature move this Pokémon learns is "Sparkling Aria", a 90 power, Water Special attack. Which sounds great, except that it also heals the target's Burn status.

OK, sure...

Primarina is a decent choice for playthroughs, just because of it's typing. But don't bring it into a serious competitive battle, you'll be laughed out of the arena.

And that's about it, Gen 7 is relatively recent, so these Pokémon will naturally have less appearances outside of the mainline games. But what's your favourite? Are you that weirdo who says Primarina?

Yeah, it's Incineroar for me, and it's no contest. Which is impressive, considering I think Litten is one of the most boring Pokémon ever.

Edited April 12 by Glen-i

[Cube]

Incineroar could work great as a standalone Pokémon, like Tony the Tiger merged with a wrestler and climbed out of hell.

 

The problem with Incineroar it follows two Pokémon that are quite similar, and goes in a completely different direction. Litten and Torracat are simple cat Pokémon, but that's what I liked. A much cooler cat Pokémon as the third evolution would be much better than a savage demon.

 

Out of the others, Owliver was also a great design.

 

Moon was my only main Pokémon game after Yellow.

[Glen-i]

4 hours ago, Cube said:

The problem with Incineroar it follows two Pokémon that are quite similar, and goes in a completely different direction.

This is a tale as old as 1996. Some of the most well liked Pokémon are ones that radically change with evolution. Gyarados and Dragonite are prime examples.

And quite frankly, Pokémon based on cats (and dogs) are a dime a dozen, so I'm A-OK with this sudden lurch.

Also, Tony the Tiger wishes he was as cool as Incineroar.

[Ashley]

Maybe the theme is ancient Olympics? Archery, wrestling, swimming? Or sports more generally. 

And while typing that I couldn't help but think of this

Spoiler

 

[BowserBasher]

6 hours ago, Glen-i said:

Incineroar's signature move is "Darkest Lariat"

So you may or may not know but Lariat is a wrestling move. It’s pretty much just a clothesline but one that is used as a wrestlers signature move. So anyone would use a clothesline, just throw your opponent into the rope, when he comes back put your arm out to the side (keeping the arm straight) and clothesline him. Sometimes it’s the one doing the clothesline doing the running. However those that up the clothesline to a Lariat and use it as a signature or finisher tend to put a bit more into it. Usually the Lariat is done with the one performing it doing the running. They also tend to put more force or motion into it. So instead of just putting the arm out they will swing the arm or their whole body into the other person sometimes almost wrapping the arm around the neck and shoulders of the opponent. Thus making it look a lot more powerful and devastating. 

[Glen-i]

46 minutes ago, Ashley said:

Maybe the theme is ancient Olympics? Archery, wrestling, swimming? Or sports more generally. 

But that falls apart with Primarina. That Pokémon is definitely meant to evoke an opera singer.

 

[Dcubed]

Only reason why I can think they decided to make Decidueye a Ghost type is because of its relation to snipers (AKA, the Ghost of The Battlefield).

Otherwise, it is a bit random really.  Still a great design either way though.  First class all the way.

Primarina is there I suppose, I keep forgetting it exists; probably because Azumarill utterly crushes it in basically every respect.

Also, you know Incineroar is great because it shoots fire out of its crotch.  I repeat.  IT SHOOTS FIRE OUT OF ITS CROTCH.  That's AWESOME!

Edited March 23 by Dcubed

[Ashley]

1 hour ago, Glen-i said:

But that falls apart with Primarina. That Pokémon is definitely meant to evoke an opera singer.

 

Okay maybe based on empires then? Opera (Italy), wrestling (Greece) and archery (England but that is a stretch)?

54 minutes ago, Dcubed said:

Also, you know Incineroar is great because it shoots fire out of its crotch.  I repeat.  IT SHOOTS FIRE OUT OF ITS CROTCH.  That's AWESOME!

So that's who Kings of Leon were singing about

[Jonnas]

Incinerorar is my main in SSBU, there's no way he isn't my favourite of this bunch. Plus, I like wrestling. Plus plus, wrestlers with feline themes specifically tend to be my jam ('sup, Tekken King?). This one would've made sense as a fire/fighting-type, but Game Freak soured their own fanbase on the combo, I guess.

Decidueye's line is pretty nifty, and I do feel like he got shafted in the long run. Good on Pokkén for including him.

Primarina does nothing for me. Not a bad design, I'm just very neutral on her. And if you hadn't cleared me up on her being an opera singer, I'd think for sure her theme was ballet.

A really good set overall.

On 23/03/2024 at 7:14 AM, Glen-i said:

it's Side Special is a completely made up move.

Look, I don't care what his Neutral B is called: Incineroar's side B (the well-executed one) is an actual, proper Lariat. The only reason his Neutral B looks like that, and is called a Lariat, is because his fighting style is very clearly modeled after Zangief from Street Fighter.

On 23/03/2024 at 7:14 AM, Glen-i said:

makes me think that the theme with Gen 7 starters is various forms of entertainment,

I think "performative arts" is the most probable theme. Pro Wrestling and Opera speak for themselves, and as for Archery... I'd argue that ancient fighting styles are generally "performed", rather than "practised": swordplay, muskets, and archery are more used for spectacle these days than anything else.

[Glen-i]

18 hours ago, Jonnas said:

The only reason his Neutral B looks like that, and is called a Lariat, is because his fighting style is very clearly modeled after Zangief from Street Fighter.

Actually, in Smash, that's a happy coincidence. Because Darkest Lariat has a similar animation in the Pokémon games.

Mind you, it looks a lot more natural in Smash. Darkest Lariat's animation is a bit naff in the Pokémon games.

Just to clarify, in case anyone misunderstood, when I say Alolan Whip is a completely made up move, I meant that the Pokémon games don't have an attack called "Alolan Whip"

Also, I think Dark is a fitting secondary type for it, if you view Incineroar as the "Heel Wrestler". You know? The perceived "villain" in WWE?

[Glen-i]

I was considering doing a smaller post for the Let's GO starters, but when I started looking into them, their most interesting trait (Being obscenely powerful) is actually more due to how borked that game's stat mechanics are, so I won't bother.

Generation 8, or Sword and Shield, are set in Galar, a region based on the United Kingdom. It's not the first mainline game to be in HD, but it is the first new generation to not allow the player to use every Pokémon precisely because of that High Definition.

  

Grookey's (GROO-kee) main method of attacking enemies is to whack it with a stick. Simple, yet effective. The stick is attached to it's head, in case you're wondering.
The first three gyms in Galar are, Grass, Water, and Fire. So the starters all perform about equally in the early game.

Thwackey (THWAK-ee) has two sticks, so twice the beatings! Speaking of which, the Pokédex states that it can get too into clobbering it's opponent that it doesn't notice when it's knocked them out. The implications of that are a little disturbing, to be honest.

If you didn't realise that this starter line has a common theme of drummers, Rillaboom (RIL-uh-boom) will make it painfully clear. You can't actually tell from the artwork, so here's the model for when it's in battle.

I lowkey love the grin on it's face here

No idea where it keeps that tree stump, by the way. It can drum on that stump to manipulate roots, and you see that in it's signature attack, "Drum Beating", an 80 power, physical grass attack which always lowers the opponents speed. This is good, because Rillaboom's speed is a bit mediocre.
Anyway, the Galar starters have the most clear-cut theme between them in the series, they also do a good job of matching the country their region is based off of. Each of the final evolutions represent one of the three aspects of media that the UK is quite well known for. Rillaboom represents music, obviously, but I'm fairly certain that Rillaboom is also referencing the Cadbury's Gorilla. That sounds a bit too specific for a Japanese game to refer to, but one of the Pokémon designers on this game is from the UK, so it wouldn't surprise me one bit if he at least suggested the concept, if not outright designed it.

Rillaboom is a pretty solid Pokémon for playthroughs. It's worst stat is one it doesn't need, and it's Attack stat is surprisingly high. But it's when you start to bring it into the competitive scene that it really starts to shine. Rillaboom's Hidden Ability is "Grassy Surge", which activates Grassy Terrain whenever Rillaboom enters battle. Combine this with "Grassy Glide" a 70 power Grass move that always goes first on Grassy Terrain, and that mediocre speed stat suddenly doesn't matter anymore.
This all served to make Rillaboom the best Grass starter in the entire series... for precisely one generation. Oh well...

The Gen 8 starters all have Gigantamax forms, by the way. They got them when the DLC dropped, because Charizard was just more important.

So yeah, these also have a recurring theme. Where most Pokémon grow massive for Gigantamax, the three starters stay relatively the same size, at least, as far as their bodies are concerned. Instead, something else grows bloody massive. In Rillaboom's case, it gets a whole drum kit!
It's still not as good as using the normal Dynamax Rillaboom though, because the mechanic is not very well balanced.

  

Scorbunny (SKOHR-buh-nee) is a very clever name. No, that's about it. That's all I've got. It was the most popular starter Pokémon when they were revealed before the game came out.

Raboot (RAB-boot) is not as clever a name as Scorbunny.

Cinderace (SIN-deh-race) is an even worse name, but it is the final evolution, so there's stuff to talk about. The whole Scorbunny line represents the UK's absolute favourite waste of time, football! You know, if the footballs were set on fire and punted at the other teams face. Actually, it would be better if actual football was like that. Why isn't football like that?

Anyway, Cinderace is a weird case of a starter Pokémon having two signature moves. No idea why, but it does, the first one is "Pyro Ball" a 120 power... Wait, 120 POWER!? What the actual hell!? It's also got 90% accuracy! For context, that's stronger then Fire Blast and 5% more accurate! It's not even remotely balanced, and would single handedly cement Cinderace as the best Galar starter in battle, but that ain't all this rabbit has in it's hat.
It's second signature move is "Court Change". Apart from crowbarring a Tennis reference on a Football based Pokémon, it swaps the side that certain effects (Such as Light Screen or Stealth Rock) are on. So for example, if the opponent uses Stealth Rock, and then you use Court Change, well, now the Stealth Rock is on the opponent's side.
The Singles meta kinda revolves around entry hazards, so this move is really good there!

But wait, there's more! Cinderace has amazing Attack and Speed, and for the extra cherry on top, it has the Hidden Ability, "Libero". This ability is exactly the same as Greninja's "Protean", so Cinderace can change it's type to whatever attack it's using. For the same reason as Greninja, this is an amazing ability.

Probably too amazing, actually. Because Cinderace with Libero became incredibly dominant in the competitive scene, so it got nerfed in Scarlet/Violet. Nowadays, Libero only changes Cinderace's type once per switch in. So once you choose a type, you're stuck with that type until you switch Cinderace out.
This "Once per switch in" nerf also applies to Protean, by the way. So yes, Game Freak literally said "Cinderace is too powerful? Better nerf Greninja!" Greninja these days is nowhere near as useful as it used to be because of that.
This also meanly nerfed Kecleon, but no-one cares because Kecleon is dreadful in the mainline games.

Gigantamax Cinderace has a big massive ball to kick around. Because of Libero, this is one of the rare Pokémon whose Gigantamax form is actually worth using.

All of this makes Cinderace easily the best Galar starter, both in standard playthroughs and the competitive scene. It'd be better then Blaziken if it wasn't for the nerf it got in the next generation, but it's still great, despite that.

  

I don't think I've ever chosen a starter as quickly as I have with Sobble (SAH-bull). What can I say? Chameleons are the coolest animal! According to the Pokédex, when Sobble gets scared, it starts crying. This is bad, because it's tears have the chemical punch of 100 onions, so you'll start tearing up too.

Drizzile (DRIZ-zyle) is there, being unnoteworthy.

Inteleon's (in-TELL-ee-un) name in German is "Intelleon" Just an amusing thing I noticed. Unlike the other two starters, it's not obvious what the theme is here until the final evolution, but Inteleon is very obviously meant to invoke James Bond. It shoots water out of it's fingers, has a membrane on it's back that can function as a paraglider, and has a second eyelid that helps it see greater distances. Because of this, Inteleon represents the movie industry in the "British media" thing going on this generation. (Yes, I know, James Bond was originally a book thing, but no-one associates that franchise with the books, come on.)

It's also my favourite starter Pokémon ever. I mean, it's a chameleon spy that literally fingerbangs it's opponents!
Yes, it always reminds me of that song from South Park, Inteleon being a James Bond expy only makes that funnier!

Inteleon's signature move is "Snipe Shot", an 80 power, Special Water attack that ignores any moves or abilities that redirects attacks to make sure it hits the intended target. What the game never actually tells you is that Snipe Shot has a high critical rate as well. So it's a pretty good move, even in Singles.

Unfortunately, despite how much I like it, I have to accept facts and tell you that Inteleon is the big loser of the Galar starters. It's not terrible, but it pales in comparison to the other two. Mostly because it doesn't have a good Hidden Ability. "Sniper" may be thematically fitting, but Inteleon is just way too frail to rely on critical hits.

Even ignoring my chameleon bias, this is still the cleverest Gigantamax form in the entire game.
The only part of Gigantamax Inteleon that gets huge is it's tail, which becomes ridculously long and functions as a makeshift sniper tower. Which is helpful because Inteleon also gets a sniper rifle made out of water. See Blastoise? That's how you have a weapon and not look completely dumb!
Not worth using over the normal Dynamax form, mind.

So that wraps it up. And I honestly think these are the best selection of starters the series has ever had. Absolutely top tier designs, with a clear theme between them, and not a single one I dislike. Cinderace may be my least favourite of the three, but I still like it, and the other two are absolutely amazing!
Obviously, Inteleon is still the best, even if it sucks in battles!

Edited April 12 by Glen-i

[Ashley]

3 hours ago, Glen-i said:

You know, if the footballs were set on fire and punted at the other teams face. Actually, it would be better if actual football was like that. Why isn't football like that?

Boy have I got a game for you

[Jonnas]

I personally find Scorbunny's line to be the best of this bunch. It's fun, it's cute, it's cool, and consistent all the way through.

Then comes Grookey's line. The concept is nice and original, and it kinda has the best Gigantamax form.

Sobble's line doesn't do much for me. I'm not that big a fan of 007-style secret agents, and he doesn't do much for me as a Sniper, either.

They're an incredibly solid set, at any rate.

On 29/03/2024 at 5:23 AM, Glen-i said:

Which is helpful because Inteleon also gets a sniper rifle made out of water. See Blastoise? That's how you have a weapon and not look completely dumb!

It... is a little silly Intelleon can already fire water instantly from his fingers, and his eyelids already take care of zooming in his eyesight (which means he doesn't even need a scope). What does he need to build a water rifle for, exactly?

[Glen-i]

22 hours ago, Jonnas said:

It... is a little silly Intelleon can already fire water instantly from his fingers, and his eyelids already take care of zooming in his eyesight (which means he doesn't even need a scope). What does he need to build a water rifle for, exactly?

To shoot water quicker, and more forcefully.

Pokédex says as much. Normal Inteleon shoots at Mach 3. Gigantamax Inteleon can do it at Mach 7.

[Ashley]

Yeah, like all gun owners he's compensating for his own inadequacy 

[Glen-i]

One more detour before we get to the latest generation. Pokémon Legends: Arceus (ARK-ee-us) is set in the Hisui region, a region heavily inspired by the island Hokkaido during early Japanese colonisation. Plot twist, it's actually the Sinnoh region in the far distant past. Despite this, none of the Gen 4 starters are available to pick as the starter in this game, instead, you're given these lot.

   

Let's ignore the fact that two of these Pokémon didn't even exist when we first visited Sinnoh...
For all intents and purposes, Rowlet, Cyndaquil, and Oshawott are pretty much exactly the same. Until they reach their final evolution, which means I have to explain regional variants.

Spoiler

Back in Gen 7, regional variants were introduced to some of the older Pokémon. Simply put, they are alternate forms of older Pokémon to freshen them up or make them fit in the region better. It's easier to show it then explain it, so I'll do so with my favourite regional variant, Marowak.

 

Kantonian Marowak (On the left) is a ground type Pokémon that clubs it's opponents with a big bone.
Alolan Marowak (On the right), on the other hand, is Fire/Ghost and has the bone club on fire, which it twirls around, much like an Hawaiian Fire Dancer.

Regional variants tend to have different types, different moves, and some even evolve into completely new Pokémon!

It's a genuinely cool idea, until Gen 9 decided to just completely ignore it and pretend a pallette swapped Tentacool and Tentacruel are completely different Pokémon.
I'm still annoyed by that...

Hisuian Decidueye is Grass/Fighting instead of Grass/Ghost. Instead of a feathery hood, this Decidueye has something that resembles an Ayaigasa, a kind of hat that is associated with Kasagake (Hat shooting). For a long time, I thought it was supposed to be some kind of samurai. If Legends: Arceus didn't bore me to death, I might have realised that was incorrect sooner.

Instead of the move Spirit Shackle, Hisuian Decidueye's signature move is "Triple Arrows". The signature moves from Legends: Arceus are weird, because of the rubbish battle system, almost all the moves function differently from every other game, and they're very boring and interchangable, so I'm only gonna talk about how they work in Generation 9.
In Gen 9, Triple Arrows is a 90 Power physical Fighting move that has a high critical rate and may also lower the opponent's defense or could possibly make them flinch. That's a lot of secondary effects, and would be a fantastic attack, but it's on Decidueye, and Decidueye is just not a good Pokémon, especially in Generation 9. It's easily the big loser of the Hisuian starters.

Hisuian Typhlosion is Fire/Ghost and it eats souls, apparently. That said, the Hisuian Pokédex is written in ancient times, so it's reliability is questionable at best. Still, the design inspiration is pretty obvious, with the wisps that surround it's neck being a common way for Japanese culture to depict spirits.

Typhlosion and Samurott didn't have signature moves when they first debuted, but the Hisuian variants do. Typhlosion's is "Infernal Parade". In Gen 9, it's a 60 power Special Ghost attack that may leave the opponent with a burn. However, if it's used on an opponent that has a status condition, the power is doubled. It's OK, a bit too gimmicky to be very useful.
Unfortunately, Typhlosion is just thoroughly outmatched these days, and while Fire/Ghost is a good offensive typing, Typhlosion still has a mediocre movepool (Normal Johtonian Typhlosion could learn a Ghost move anyway).

For some reason, @Serebii's site doesn't have the artwork for this on it's page

Hisuian Samurott barely differs in design from the original Unovan one. But it was based on a Samurai in the first place, so at least it actually fits the region it's in this time. It's Water/Dark now, and in Generation 9, is completely amazing!

You see, Hisuian Samurott has two things it's original form lacks, and those two things make it an absolute unit of a Pokémon that's cemented itself in the competitive scene. The first thing is it's signature move, "Ceaseless Edge". It's a 65 Power, physical Dark attack with 90% accuracy, but if it hits, it sets a layer of the entry hazard, Spikes on the opponents side. Spikes hurts any grounded Pokémon that switches in, and you can layer it up to three times. Entry Hazards in general are very powerful tools, so being able to attack and set them at the same time is nothing short of overpowered! If only it was stronger then 65 power...

Oh wait, Hisuian Samurott's Hidden Ability is "Sharpness", which boosts the power of any slicing move by 50%. So now, Ceaseless Edge is stronger then Crunch. Sharpness also works on moves like Aerial Ace and X-Scissor, making Samurott a dangerous Pokémon for a lot of types. An impressive climb to glory for the big loser of Gen 5!

And that sums it up. I think the resdesigns here are decent enough. Samurott is a bit boring, but the others are good. We'll very likely see three other starters get similar treatment when Legends: Z-A comes out. Not Greninja though, can't be accidentally buffing Greninja now, can we?

Edited April 12 by Glen-i

[Jonnas]

Samurott looks a little bit better like this, but I strongly dislike the other two. Those colours do not match those Pokémon.

Yeah, that's pretty much it

[Glen-i]

Oh my god... I've completely forgotten the name of this region... Lemme just check Serebii...

Right! Generation 9, or Scarlet and Violet, are set in the Paldea region, a region I totally didn't forget the name of because I literally fell asleep playing it at one point. This region is based on the Iberian Peninsula, which consists of Spain, Portugal, and Andorra. That said, Paldea mostly focuses on the Spanish aspect of it, with a hint of Portugal in some areas. This game is the series' first fully open world game, so naturally, I hate it. But this is a thread about the Pokémon themselves, so that's not important one bit.

  

Sprigatito (SPRIG-uh-TEE-toh) is basically "Litten, but Grass Type". Try and convince me otherwise! It's actually quite astonishing how, lame, this starter is. Pokémon has certainly had it's fair share of cats, so it wouldn't be so bad, but we just had a cat starter two generations ago, and Sprigatito doesn't do anything to distinguish itself from that.
Paldea's first gym is Bug type, well, I say "first", but you can do the gyms in any order, technically, and the intended order is unintuitive and confusing, so it doesn't matter too much here.

At least Floragato (FLOR-uh-GAH-toh) goes bipedal quicker then the Litten line. That's all I've got.

Thankfully, Meowscarada (MEOW-skah-RAH-da) manages to be somewhat different to Incineroar. The Paldean starters have a common theming of the three main pillars of the entertainment industry, it kinda feels like Game Freak wanted another crack at the Gen 7 theming. Anyway, Meowscarada represents acting, specifically the kind of acting you see in the theater. That flower bud that seems to be floating is actually suspended by Meowscarada's reflective fur, an obvious nod to a common trick for a similar effect in theaters.

Anyway, Meowscarada is Grass/Dark and it's signature move is "Flower Trick" a 70 power, physical Grass attack that never misses and always lands a critical hit! Because of this, it's effectively 105 power, which is amazing! Man, if Inteleon had a move like that, it would probably be really great in battles! 
As well as that, it's hidden ability is "Protean", sure, it's the nerfed version, but it still helps. Couple those with Meowscarada's base 123 speed (Higher then Cinderace!), and you've got a Grass starter that is far and away, the best one ever.

  

Fuecoco (fwey-KO-ko) is the closest you're getting to a Bubble Dragon in Pokémon. No, seriously. Everyone thinks so, it's not even remotely subtle!

I'm amazed Taito didn't sue!

It's a crocodile-pepper hybrid and is impossibly cute. The colouring on it's face (And the evolutions) is very likely to be referencing calaveras, decorative skulls that are associated with the Day of the Dead celebrations.
Yeah, I know, that's more of a Mexican tradition, but I can't think of what else it could be.

Crocalor (KROCK-uh-lor) replaces the peppery tufts with some kind of bird nest. And yes, it does look a bit like a Sombrero.

Skeledirge (SKEL-uh-durj) is a strange Pokémon. It's a quadruped, when the previous two evolutions were bipedal. You don't see that often in Pokémon.
Anyway, it's Fire/Ghost, which lends further credence to the whole Day of the Dead connection, and the egg has hatched into a bird now. Skeledirge commands that bird by singing (Guess what the theme is with this Pokémon) into a fiery microphone. You can't see it in the artwork, so...

The move above is Torch Song, an 80 power, Special Fire attack that also raises Skeledirge's Special Attack. Considering Skeledirge has good Defense and HP, those stat boosts can start making quite the difference if it hangs around long enough.

Skeledirge is, decent, simply put. It's got a decent Hidden Ability in Unaware, and it's stats complement it's signature move, but Meowscarada completely eclipses it. A shame too, because Skeledirge is a very cool Pokémon.

  

According to the Pokédex, Quaxly (KWACKS-lee) originally migrated to Paldea from "a distant land". The game doesn't elaborate on that, so it's anyone's guess if it will actually amount to anything.
I'm not sure if it was here, but I somewhat recall someone calling it "Admiral Quacks", I dunno, that name amuses me. The evolutions do not go in that direction, mind.

Blah, blah, blah. Quaxwell (KWACKS-well), middle evolution, moving on.

Quaquaval (KWACK-wuh-vul) rounds off this trio of entertainment with dancing. Naturally, the animal of reference shifts from a duck, to a peacock with this evolution.

Biggest GIF I could find, sorry.

This thing has great animations, by the way. You wouldn't be able to create a Pokémon like this in the 2D style games.
That said, this Pokémon seems to be a reference to the Rio Festival in Brazil. At least, that's what comes to my mind. If @Jonnas wants to chime in with some thoughts on what else these Pokémon could be referring to, go right ahead, this is probably the only set of Pokémon where I'm not the best person to ask here.

But I can damn well tell you how it performs competitively! Quaquaval's signature move is "Aqua Step", an 80 power, physical Water attack that raises Quaquaval's Speed. Yeah, it's sort of similar to Rillaboom's Drum Beating, probably a little better though, because raising your stats is generally better then lowering the opponent's. Combine this move with it's hidden ability, "Moxie" which raises it's Attack every time it knocks out a Pokémon, and you have a great revenge killer Pokémon. Problem is, apart from it's Attack, the rest of it's stats are about average, so it struggles in the insane competitive scene with Generation 9.

And we're done! That's all of the starters! Generation 9 ends on a relatively good note for me here. Skeledirge and Quaquaval are very cool designs, but I'm not keen on Meowscarada. I just don't like it's face.

Anyway, seeing as we're at the end of our starter journey, it's time for me to flaunt my absolutely impeccable opinion by ranking the Pokémon here.

Spoiler

Gonna keep it to one Pokémon per generation for these.

1. Grovyle
2. Rillaboom
3. Serperior
4. Chesnaught
5. Ivysaur
6. Torterra
7. Decidueye
8. Meganium
9. Meowscarada

Spoiler

1. Skeledirge
2. Incineroar
3. Infernape
4. Charizard
5. Emboar
6. Typhlosion
7. Blaziken
8. Cinderace
9. Delphox

Spoiler

1. Inteleon
2. Greninja
3. Feraligatr
4. Swampert
5. Quaquaval
6. Samurott
7. Empoleon
8. Primarina
9. Blastoise

Anyway, you probably noticed that I included the pronounciations for these Pokémon in this post. You see, I recently discovered that @Serebii has a page documenting all the official pronounciation for almost all of the Pokémon. I'll be retroactively adding these pronounciations to the older posts here.

Edited April 12 by Glen-i

[Ashley]

Shouldn't it be SPRIG-ah-TEE-toh to bring it in line with the Spanish pronunciation of gatito (kitten)?

Maybe Fuecoco's colouring is a reference to this Spanish tradition:

But probably not

[Glen-i]

23 minutes ago, Ashley said:

Shouldn't it be SPRIG-ah-TEE-toh to bring it in line with the Spanish pronunciation of gatito (kitten)?

Yeah, the thing with official Pokémon pronounciations is that most of it comes from the anime. And when it comes to the English names, that's handled by Americans, who tend to not really care for how certain words are pronounced in other countries.

The pronounciation for some of the Galar Pokémon will make you want to fold into yourself.

[Ashley]

27 minutes ago, Glen-i said:

Yeah, the thing with official Pokémon pronounciations is that most of it comes from the anime. And when it comes to the English names, that's handled by Americans, who tend to not really care for how certain words are pronounced in other countries.

The pronounciation for some of the Galar Pokémon will make you want to fold into yourself.

Ah that's true. It's the same reason I won't say Studio Ghibli the way they claim it should be pronounced. 

[Jonnas]

Sprigatito's line looks cute and stylish. Good theming with grass too. I like her a lot. I was hoping the evolutions would resemble the Iberian Lynx a bit more, but "Harlequin cat" is a good theme as well.

Fuecoco's line looks cute and goofy, in all the best ways. After the very anthropomorphic starters we've had for the last few generations, it's nice to see one that just looks like a very cool animal again. And yeah, it's very Mexican-themed. The Iberian peninsula has hats that resemble sombreros, but the skull-face on Skeledirge is very Dia de los Muertos.

I do not like Quaquaval. They had such a good thing going with that handsome Donald duckling, and then he just turns into a peacock? Bah. The tail does turn into a stereotypical Rio Carnaval parade costume, and the dancing... it has the right idea, but he needs some work to improve:

(Disclaimer: I am not Brazillian, I have never participated in Rio's Carnival, nor have I grown up with the culture. But even I can see those hips aren't shaking enough)

Anyway, the theme here is clearly "festivities". Meowscarada represents European Carnival, Quaquaval represents Brazillian Carnival, Skeledirge represents the Dia de los Muertos. Seems straightforward to me.