Eurovision 2016!

[Mr-Paul]

First semi-final is about to start!

 

Who's watching?

[Tales]

Move aside Drake, something more important came along.

[Fierce_LiNk]

We're watching!

 

Finland were shiiiiiite.

 

BRAP, BRAP, BRAP!

[Mr-Paul]

1. Finland. Bad singer. Bland song 2/10

2. Greece. Sounded like it had potential. Then the rap came in. Hot ladies. More effort put into the dance. Can’t beat a big drum. Topless man. 4/10

3. Moldova. Standard europop. Pretty lady. DANCING ASTRONAUT! 6/10

[Fierce_LiNk]

If I were to become a woman, I'd wear clothes like the Croatian singer every day.

 

I don't even know what it is meant to be. It's like, "fuck this shit, I'm wearing everything at the same time!" I think I can see a tree there.

[Mr-Paul]

VERKA SEDUCHKA APPEARANCE! BEST EUROVISION SONG EVER.

 

4. Hungary. Eastern European Zayn Malik. Has a sore throat. Whistling clapping men and big drum. Catchy chorus actually. 7/10

5. Croatia. Why is she in a plastic sheet? Ah, now it’s been ripped off and she’s a shiny thing with some long feathery bits. Quite like her voice but the song isn’t winning me over. KEY CHANGE! 6/10.

6. Netherlands. Unremarkable country music, but I quite like something about it. Won’t be successful at all. Too safe. Randomly stops in the middle for 10 seconds. 7/10

[Fierce_LiNk]

Netherlands is my favourite, so far.

 

Armenian woman has a hnnnnngg body.

[Mr-Paul]

7. Armenia – SMOKE MACHINE. Sexy and mysterious. This is very dramatic and Eurovision. Don’t like her voice. Ghost clones! Think this one might do quite well. 6/10

8. San Marino – Creepy old man with shiny backing dancers. What is this? Awful song! 2/10

9. Russia – Dancing to stuff on a screen. Been done before. Wasn’t it last year’s winner? Quite catchy. Will do well. KEY CHANGE! 7/10

[Fierce_LiNk]

Russia's performance had everything. I was fucking DYING from laughing so hard at the wing special effects. But the effects towards the end were pretty cool. I don't actually remember the song, only the pretty visuals.

 

San Marino would actually sound ok if they gave the entire song to the backing singers or somebody with a bit of extra volume. The actual backing bits and music weren't too bad.

[Mr-Paul]

10. Czech Republic – Not a fan of ballads much. Pretty lady though. Not bad actually. 6/10

11. Cyprus – RAWK. It’s Somebody Told Me by The Killers turned into a Eurovision song. I want this to go through. 7/10.

12. Austria – Cute. This is nice. I like it. Won’t do well because it’s in French. Will get 12 from France though. She’s lovely. 7/10

[bob]

*grump rant*

 

I don't like the fact they televise the semi-finals. I feel it ruins the finals if people have seen all the acts already.

 

*grump rant*

[Mr-Paul]

*grump rant*

 

I don't like the fact they televise the semi-finals. I feel it ruins the finals if people have seen all the acts already.

 

*grump rant*

 

But if you don't watch them you don't get to see some of the best acts who don't make the final!

[Fierce_LiNk]

*grump rant*

 

I don't like the fact they televise the semi-finals. I feel it ruins the finals if people have seen all the acts already.

 

*grump rant*

 

NO.

 

MORE LIGHTS, WOMEN AND CHEESE, PLEASE.

[Mr-Paul]

13. Estonia – Face and voice don’t match. Scary eyes. Like the staging. Could be decent if it had a better singer. 5/10

14. Azerbaijan – Sexy shiny golden bodysuit YES. Decent pop song. Probably one of the better ones of tonight. 7/10

15. Montenegro – MOSH MOSH MOSH. SMOKE MACHINES. SO EDGY. Not feeling the song though. 5/10.

[Fierce_LiNk]

Montenegro has a lot of potential but the lyrics are pretty shit. Good music, nice strobe effects and the singer's voice is pretty decent. But, the lyrics kill the song. All the right components except for one. Gah.

 

Iceland have a good entry. I quite like it.

[Mr-Paul]

Yeah Montenegro was let down by the lyrics and the vocals for me. Had potential.

 

16. Iceland – YES WIND MACHINE. Shadow dancers. I think this one is good. It’s got everything Eurovision about it. 8/10

17. Bosnia-Herzegovina – FOIL. Have they just finished a marathon? Duet. Barbed wire separating the man and woman. Nah, not feeling it. Best rap of the evening though, despite not understanding a word of it. 5/10.

18. Malta – Nothing wrong with this one, but it isn’t standing out at all. Just plain Europop. It’ll do alright though just by being fine. 6/10.

 

 

Iceland the winner for me overall.

[Fierce_LiNk]

WTF! No Iceland?! How did that happen?

[Eenuh]

Iceland didn't get through? How strange! I thought that was possibly the best song tonight. Hmmm. :S

[Mr-Paul]

Russia, Azerbaijan, Netherlands, Hungary, Croatia, Austria, Armenia, Czech Republic, Cyprus, Malta.

 

HOW DID ICELAND NOT GET THROUGH? BEST SONG. FUCK YOU EUROPE.

 

No real complaints about most of those though.

[Sméagol]

Don't give a shit about Eurovision.

 

But give me a list of all the babes I should Google. I'm already aware of the Armenian woman.

[Mr-Paul]

Semi final TWO!

 

Just me and Flink again, or is anyone else joining the fun?

[Eenuh]

Semi final TWO!

 

Just me and Flink again, or is anyone else joining the fun?

 

I watch it with Flink of course. Pretty sure I introduced this tradition to him. :P

 

Belgium performing today as the very last one! Haven't heard the song so not sure what to expect! If it's bad, I apologise in advance!

[killthenet]

This intro song is fully appalling.

[Mr-Paul]

Of course! How could I forget you @Eenuh!

 

Loving this opening musical number! So completely full of cheese!

 

@killthenet you're so wrong.

[Fierce_LiNk]

That was amazing. In a "what am I doing with my life?" kinda way.