Most Inappropriate Things To Say In Any Given Situation Thread

[ipaul]

It's alright, I've been shagging your girlfriend so I would say we're even.

[Guest Stefkov]

For the amount of shards on the floor I get to hit you in the face that many times.

 

Dont worry I'm fucking loaded mate, I can afford 3 more. Just rub that in your stupid fucking head.

[Mundi]

It´s because of things like this that made me murder your parents...

[MoogleViper]

"Wow! That went through the TV harder than I went through your mum."

[Emasher]

You: Thats OK it was just a knock off anyway.

Friend: Really?

You: Nope, pay up or I'll have my elite team of hit-men throw you out a 20th story window.

[MoogleViper]

"Haha jokes on you. I stole that TV from your house."

[Guest Stefkov]

You best start running or I'll shove that wiimote up a place where the sun don't shine.

[EEVILMURRAY]

"Prince Ali, yes it is he but not as you know him. Read my lips, and come to grips, with reality. Yes meet a blast from your past, Who's lies were to good to last! Say Hello to your precious! Prince! Ali!"

 

Most inappropriate.

[AshMat]

"I am SO banging your mum tonight for that"

[ipaul]

I wonder if your girlfriend will smash into that many pieces when I'm doing her tonight.

 

This should be judged before we lose it =P

[MoogleViper]

I think it's time to pick a winner.

[ShadowV7]

"Haha jokes on you. I stole that TV from your house."

 

This ones the winner in my eyes. Would of picked earlier but been busy-ish today.

 

This made me laugh a lot when I read it and it beats reading about sexual references all the time

[MoogleViper]

OK

 

You are a doctor and are about to tell a patient that they are terminally ill.

[Guest Jordan]

"Oh man, I have to tell this guy next that he's gunna die from cancer, he's so fucked... Oh shit."

[Mr_Odwin]

I am a really healthy guy, and by "I am" I mean "you are" and by "a really healthy guy" I mean "gonna die real soon".

[weeyellowbloke]

"So, ummmmm, you've not got any plans for the holidays have you?"

 

"Ok, Bambi's mum, JFK, Genghis Khan, Archduke Franz Ferdinand, James Brown and you in in a few months. What do they all have in common?"

 

"I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is I've just had the bailiffs come round to repossess my house. The good news is you're dying soon and the hospital have said I can take your bed until I find a new place."

[Guest Stefkov]

So *claps hands* Great news! You're terminally ill.

[ReZourceman]

"Good news or the bad news?...

 

...The good ; you're not dead yet.

 

The bad ; you will be soon."

 

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"Sucks for you!"

 

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"Well Mrs Hampton, you're pregnant"

 

"My names Mr Sampson....."

 

"....Oh, then you're gonna die."

 

[weeyellowbloke]

"Look on the brightside, you'll leave a beautiful corpse."

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"So, you work at the airport I see"

"No, I work at the garage"

"Why does it say terminal 3 here then. Oh wait, forgot my glasses"

[ipaul]

You know I could really use a new TV and I don't think you'll be using yours from now on...

[Vicar]

If you are lucky you can be a body in the next CSI series.

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Good news you don't have a tumor, but your still going to die.

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I looks like your not going to see the next Batman movie....Sucks to be you.

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Well you just might make it to Christmas if your lucky.

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[ipaul]

Shall we have a winner now...?

[Guest Stefkov]

'So just a quick question.. Are you a virgin?'

'uum, yeah why?'

'Oh man. Sucks to be you then.'

[ipaul]

'So just a quick question.. Are you a virgin?'

'uum, yeah why?'

 

'Looks like I'm your last chance then '

[weeyellowbloke]

"For some reason I was just reminded of my old dog Lucy. Poor thing died about a year ago. She struggled on for weeks in utter agony before she died. I really miss her."

"I'm really sorry to hear that, but what's this got to do with me."

"Uhh, you'll find out soon enough."