Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 25, 2009 Share Posted December 25, 2009 I feel like Anakin skywalker at the cusp of being in league with the ways of the mfing Sith right about now... (que laughter if you wish). What I want to sort of discuss are the effects of a messed up, imbalanced and highly negative childhood and ther effects on adults, mainly how they change the natural composition of a person; Anakin - Darth Vader being a nice fictious example. I am a good guy naturally, as in I care for people and instinctly seem to need to be polite and kind to people regardless of my state of temperament. People like me, and think I am 'nice' etc. But I feel I have a 'dark side' that no one has truly seen which I feel is directly linked with the negative features in my upbringing, namely a broken home. Without going into detail; 'daddy wasn't there', mother marries a fucking egotistical jerk and sibling rivalry and mistrust (which I feel is a slight psychological consequence of being all half related). I haven't spoken to my mums husband for 7 years (literally) and most of that time was spent living in the same house, and for good reason which most people can understand but just not understand how I am capable of maintaining such 'malice'. Then there is my older sister who never really showed me the sort of familial love that I'd prefer (hugs, psychological support , understanding etc) - the type of love I naturally show my younger sister. She is amplified by a self serving nature, negativety and sibling rivalry. She did something today that is forcing me to want to just disconnect with her. Probably sounds a tad immature but it's actually fairly deep and very psychological. I feel in turmoil; I've always been in control of my darker side mainly due to the fact that I care but now I just want to 'unleash the beast'. I've been too kind. And I feel this kindness Is almost a 'negative' in that it is easily taken advantage of and maybe restricts ones full capacity to fully express oneself. Just want to know, is anyone else ever been or is in a similar state of self turmoil? Or any trained psychotherapists available? :/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bard Posted December 25, 2009 Share Posted December 25, 2009 I will get back to you, if you want a thoroughly amateur Freudean psychoanalysis of yourself, but first; tell me about your mother . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 25, 2009 Author Share Posted December 25, 2009 (edited) (Hope you're being serious but yes please) She wishes for that perfect family scenerio, but she seems to not understand the pathology of events that occur. She doesn't hate me and tries her beat to support me but our relationship sadly wasn't really deep, no deep talk on important stuff etc. When I was younger though, for the fact of wanting to keep her husband, she would support him always over me. So for example if he was pissed off at me for no clear reason or for reasons floating in his mind, she would 'second that' without question and maybe even get in a few hits. Edited December 25, 2009 by King_V Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy-the-Dane Posted December 25, 2009 Share Posted December 25, 2009 Well, you certainly must not let yourself get abused. Do not mistake "being good" for letting yourself get trampled on and taken advantage of. It's hard to say what you should do without knowing details, nor do I think we'd be much better at helping you if we knew them. You have to decide for yourself - it's your life, not ours, not your family's. You sound like you have you have a pretty good understanding of good and bad, so I don't fear that you are "turning to the dark side" by caring about yourself here. If you feel you are being treated unfairly, don't just accept it. Yeah, I don't really know how to round this post off. I think I've said what I wanted to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bard Posted December 25, 2009 Share Posted December 25, 2009 First and foremost: Psychopathology is a part of human life. Everyone (every being, without exception) suffers from neurosis. Secondly, altruistic actions are, in themselves self serving - you are nice to people because you're deferring your basic drives - mate, feed, kill - because you hope to find some alternative, greater, on-going pleasure in the future - Nietzsche would call it the Will to Power, Freud would call it the pleasure principle, I would call it motherfuckery, and Marx doesn't give a shit. Now, if being nice, is fucked, and there's no chance of getting anything out of it, then why not be a dick? Hey, look at me, I'm the biggest dickhead here, and I'm happy as fuck. Oh yeah, i forgot, there's the small matter of that force of perpetual unreason, the personal agitation - bad conscience - you need to beat this ho down and tell her to take it like the bitch she is. Without lube. I'm helping you here. I'm instigating, I'm freeing your mind, showing you what you've known all this time: People are the self-contradictory, self perpetuating seed of satan. They aspire to nothing but the self. Harvest the force, Darth Negrious: GO FORTH, AND KILL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 25, 2009 Author Share Posted December 25, 2009 (edited) Thank you Bard, for my only cause of laughter all day. Darth Negrious was the high point. But you have a brilliant point. Being a fucking 'nice' person is like an automatic cruise control mental response. When really there's so much anger behind this smile. (que imperial march). Edited December 25, 2009 by King_V Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bard Posted December 25, 2009 Share Posted December 25, 2009 (edited) I do what I can . Actually...following SW naming conventions (Darth Vader, Sidious etc) you would actually be Darth Grious. But that just doesn't have the same ring to it. Contact me for an in depth explanation of the etymology of Sith Lord names[/sarcasm] Edited December 25, 2009 by The Bard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jayseven Posted December 25, 2009 Share Posted December 25, 2009 So you had a good christmas then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daft Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Don't bottle stuff up or you'll end up a cun†, like me. Probably missed the point. Just wanted to swear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mundi Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Thanks for the life story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 Thanks for the life story. Thanks for this pointless post. You dick. (you mean like this Bard?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mundi Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 First and foremost: I'm helping you here. I'm instigating, I'm freeing your mind, showing you what you've known all this time: People are the self-contradictory, self perpetuating seed of satan. They aspire to nothing but the self. Harvest the force, Darth Negrious: GO FORTH, AND KILL. I cannot believe that I did not pick up on the Slayer quote at first. I feel ashamed... Thanks for this pointless post. You dick. (you mean like this Bard?) Aww gee, you could have just used the "Thanks" button to convey your gratitude. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bard Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Thanks for this pointless post. You dick. (you mean like this Bard?) Do not be afraid to beat people down with your cudgel of righteous anger. To Mundi: There are obscure references in pretty much all my posts Happy hunting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightwolf Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Thanks for this pointless post. You dick. (you mean like this Bard?) You forget alot of people have this crap going on in their lives too and yet don't need to post their OWN thread on it.. Some people won't take it seriously, you just have to get some balls and deal with that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fused King Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 Well you know what they say: 'The common may fly makes love roughly 2160 times on one day and then dies' Glad to be of service:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 You forget alot of people have this crap going on in their lives too and yet don't need to post their OWN thread on it.. Some people won't take it seriously, you just have to get some balls and deal with that. ...who the fucks talking to you? Point is, it's a topic, if you have nothing of interest related to the topic to add then go make your 1000th pointless post in the 'how was your day' thread. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightwolf Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 ...who the fucks talking to you? Point is, it's a topic, if you have nothing of interest related to the topic to add then go make your 1000th pointless post in the 'how was your day' thread. Wow you must be so good with the ladies. I was commenting, not attacking. But never mind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 Wow you must be so good with the ladies. I was commenting, not attacking. But never mind. That crap don't work with me. Just because you are female don't expect some sort of 'extra care' when you attempt to sling a bit of venom around. No, you have no pity from me. Get some balls and deal with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightwolf Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 That crap don't work with me. Just because you are female don't expect some sort of 'extra care' when you attempt to sling a bit of venom around. No, you have no pity from me. Get some balls and deal with it. Yes because.. actually. Can't be arsed. Congrats on the bad life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 Meh, pathetic. Next time 'think' before you attempt to belittle certain people; we won't all bowl over and take crap just because you're a 'lady'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grazza Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 First of all, King V, love is the most important thing of all. I'm grateful I can't identify with the broken home, but you have my full sympathy and I'm sending you some heterosexual love down the internet right now... there, did you get it? I don't think I can help much, as I don't think I truly understand the problem, but there are three things I can say: 1) Sometimes you just need to accept that people were what they were (depending on how serious it was). I've probably made enough mistakes in my life to give me countless sleepless nights, but you just have to move on. If it's more serious than that, ask your GP to recommend a psychiatrist - there's no shame in it (I say ask your GP, so you don't get ripped off). 2) It can help a great deal to learn to be assertive. This way, you neither bottle things up nor get aggressive and lose your temper. When someone wrongs you, just state your case, but always, always be polite and calm. Easier said than done, but it's the only way. 3) This is what I say to anyone who feels down in the dumps. Look forward to all the great things there are in life. I get so flippin' excited at the thought of all the new technology there'll be in the future, and all the things I could achieve personally, it keeps me happy more often than not. Chin up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 Thank you Grazza, you're always a respectable person... Sometimes I wonder how you can maintain such posture (esp on this wacky world of the Internet). But I don't want sympathy, and that wasn't my intention. But i have a need to question if love really does conquer all... Im pretty sure if worst comes to worst, I would be capable of adapting to a life without 'love', being self-sufficient and happy. Giving love also does not guarantee receiving love (connecting with the Bards psycho analysis of altruism being self serving in nature I guess). But I definetely agree with being more assertive. I am fairly humble and usually refrain from expressing negativety towards people. But I guess that's a mechanism that just 'holds you back' from expressing yourself fully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Bard Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 (edited) You forget alot of people have this crap going on in their lives too and yet don't need to post their OWN thread on it.. Some people won't take it seriously, you just have to get some balls and deal with that. So what you're saying is that a thread concerning someones genuine personal problems is ostensibly less worthwhile than "Post Your Christmas Tree '09," or "Your Town" ? Specious. Of course, it does reinforce what I said previously about people only caring about the self. ...who the fucks talking to you? Point is, it's a topic, if you have nothing of interest related to the topic to add then go make your 1000th pointless post in the 'how was your day' thread. The force strong with this one, yet technique lacking somewhat is. Only thing that can counter oestrogen rage is the ethnic minority card. Use it well. They fuck you up, your mum and dad. They may not mean to, but they do. They fill you with the faults they had And add some extra, just for you. But they were fucked up in their turn By fools in old-style hats and coats, Who half the time were soppy-stern And half at one another's throats. Man hands on misery to man. It deepens like a coastal shelf. Get out as early as you can, And don't have any kids yourself. Edited December 26, 2009 by The Bard Automerged Doublepost Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon_BlizZACK Posted December 26, 2009 Author Share Posted December 26, 2009 Yes, master. :p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nightwolf Posted December 26, 2009 Share Posted December 26, 2009 So what you're saying is that a thread concerning someones genuine personal problems is ostensibly less worthwhile than "Post Your Christmas Tree '09," or "Your Town" ?. If people had paid attention to my 'this is a comment, not an attack' nor made it into a sexism comment, this would have been avoided. But alas. :p Unfortunetly it seems king_v wanted to think otherwise. Apologies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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