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Reggie's wants you to be his assistant!


Hellfire

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According to this link: http://www.joystiq.com/2007/01/30/nintedos-reggie-wants-you-as-his-assistant/

So basically it's what the title says, this is the description:

 

Assistant To The President – 0700000004

Nintendo of America Inc.

The worldwide leader and innovator in the creation of interactive entertainment, Nintendo Co., Ltd., of Kyoto, Japan, manufactures and markets hardware and software for its popular home and portable video game systems. Each year, hundreds of all-new titles for the best-selling Game Boy® Advance SP, Nintendo DS™ and Nintendo GameCube™ systems extend Nintendo's vast game library and continue the tradition of delivering a rich, diverse mix of quality video games for players of all ages. Since the release of its first home video game system in 1983, Nintendo has sold more than 2 billion video games and more than 360 million hardware units globally, creating enduring industry icons such as Mario™ and Donkey Kong® and launching popular culture franchise phenomena such as Metroid®, Zelda™ and Pokémon®. A wholly owned subsidiary, Nintendo of America Inc., based in Redmond, WA, serves as headquarters for Nintendo's operations in the Western Hemisphere.

 

Description of Duties

Provides support of a highly complex and responsible nature to Company President

Performs advanced, diverse, and confidential duties that may be administrative in nature or project based

Interfaces with high level internal and external contacts requiring considerable discretion and initiative

Researches background material and collects data for reports, speeches, and correspondence

Updates and distributes highly confidential product planning report

May carry out assignments relating to civic or committee activities involving fund raising, membership drives, board meetings and social functions of senior management

Screens, routes, and/or independently handles a significant number of phone calls and e-mails

Manages executive's schedule including travel, speaking engagements, trade events

Prepares expense reporting and speech materials including PowerPoint presentations

Prepares and maintains Action Memos

Organizes all details of several offsite workshops each year

 

Qualifications

Summary of Requirements

Eight years related experience

Broad and comprehensive experience, including a thorough knowledge of the organization, including policies and practices

Detailed knowledge of organizational operations, procedures, and personnel

Excellent PC skills including Windows, Word, and Excel

High level expertise with PowerPoint

Ability to relay information with tact and diplomacy

Bilingual in Japanese/English preferred

 

Education

Vocational certification as an executive secretary, or equivalent

 

** Applications and resumes will only be accepted through Nintendo's website as we no longer accept paper, faxed, or emailed resumes.

Also:

20070131.jpg

Genious.

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The lucky assistant will also be offered an optional affair package, dinner with Reggie could be nice. I'd willingly do what he asks in order to get a look at those secret Nintendo games.

 

Get me a cocktail dress and a plane ticket to America and I'll get you your details on the next Zelda.

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Excellent, this could be finally my chance to seduce him and have carry me in his mighty paw to the top the Empire State for a romantic dinner alone. Just him, me and the Sopwith Camels of American Air Force. Heavenly.

 

And they said 'quire' was a insult on the Zelda-thread. Or you're a girl(1). Or you like boys. But I wouldn't do that. His big hands will kick your butt and then takes your name to live undercover in the gamingworld. So if you ever get that romantic date, please inform us, so we know Reggie will be posting on the forum very soon.

 

Wouldn't want to be too much around the guy, though. He seems like a very nasty man... Yes.

 

(1) I'm sorry if you are and I called you quire. Really, I am. I'm also sorry if you find it and insult if you were a boy, so i'm sorry both ways. But no edit coming up.

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"I'm Jasper - what's your, ow wait, you're that Reggie Fill-'aim' guy, not?"

"It's FiZZ-AMEE! FIZZ-AMEE I tell you. But you know what i'll take your name!"

"What about getting some more channels running on Wii, make the console DVD-enabled and giving it CD-capability?"

"I think you're about to die'

"Well I think you sh... Die?"

 

Runs away like hell.

 

It's like love to talk to Reggie - I'm sure of that. Just like making sweet, passionate love to a woman. Except it's like dieing (How do you do that one anyway? Dying is not right...) in it. Ah well. Sweet, sweet dreams.

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What they don't tell you on the duties list is that you may also be required to "take care" of certain people should Reggie "see fit" that they are going to be "a threat" to the company. The method you use and way of "disposal" will be up to you, Reggie likes it when you are as creative as possible while making sure no signs point in his direction

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I just noticed a little detail. Reggie is about kicking ass and he wants an assistant.

I'd rather not take that job then, I guess.

 

I've mentioned the word 'sick' before, haven't I? If you see those things, i'de rather have you go seeing a doctor. Or a shrink. It's all up to you.

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Eight years related experience

Broad and comprehensive experience, including a thorough knowledge of the organization, including policies and practices

 

I always find it kinda funny when they say stuff like that because everyone seems to say it.

 

 

I've mentioned the word 'sick' before, haven't I? If you see those things, i'de rather have you go seeing a doctor. Or a shrink. It's all up to you.

:hmm::wtf:

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I always find it kinda funny when they say stuff like that because everyone seems to say it.

 

 

 

:hmm::wtf:

 

Don't Ask. Really, don't. I'm sick in the head. I like to do things to people... Like steal their hearts! Literally, that is.(1)

 

(1) These may be really odd and ankward lies. We're not quite sure...

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