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Everything posted by jayseven
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wahey! Beat Mono City 4-0! About bleeding time I got an emphatic victory. Got to give some thanks to Haden who gave me several trinkets of advice that clearly helped. The league's beginning to split, now. Clearly Mcoy and Creamola are the top dogs, with domstercool's team right behind them for the third place. One slip-up from him or me will probably conclude which team comes third...
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I agree - I like the concept a lot. Back in brighton, the train says "The next station is portslade... We are now approaching portslade... This is portslade" all in about two minutes. The story is contained in itself; but the main problems for me aare... - Background. You have an 'aim' of getting to some unnamed place a few stops away, but no suggestion of where he's come from. Perhaps he's not come from anywhere - perhaps he's never getting anywhere... But the mention of another station, and the character's fairly upbeat nature at the beginning suggests this is an anomalous situation. For some sort of "off-screen" starting point, maybe some suggestions of some array of paraphenalia to do with something the character's been doing - bagful of unwrapped presents, or a football scarf, or a briefcase - or a new set of stitches on an arm... or something a bit more odd, like a massive stack of books to do with perhaps drugs (or paranoia, or moebus loops, as I think they're called - Phillip K dick, Chuck Palahniuk, Albert Camus, Kafka, and so on) or some mysterious object or something. Do you get me? Some sense of a past will help solidify the craziness of the time loop. - Description of Croy. Shithole and council estates certainly depict a nasty place, but perhaps more sensual, gritty descriptions. Trains wait at platforms for at least 40 seconds, which is a long time to gaze at a landscape. No need to rush it - if anything, the beginning of the story should be slow, spread out. Once the loops begin then the pace can be whipped up - The woman. A story such as this demands each significant object, or in this case person, to be rich and worthy of their role as a symbol. She gets molested, so she wants to represent something you think is being molested in the physical world that this is occuring - maybe you note she keeps looking at a watch. Maybe she can't stop smiling. Some sort of reality perception being molested? Also, the character's reaction to the nose appears to be calmly walking to his seat. The screams are "familiar" already, too, which suggests passivity. I'm sorry if I get too critical, I really just want to help I like how he says he doesn't trust himself in his state, and I want to know more about his state; I want there to be something besides the Croy thing, because if it was me in that situation, talking to someone else whom I presume is also experiencing the loop would be the first thing I'd do. Again, perhaps alienating her, estranging her would support the silence. I Like how the giggle escapes from his lips. There's this thing called deixis, which is about how the narrator positions things; for example, saying "i moved my arm" is different to "my arm itched my face", as it reduces control. I would recommend perhaps shifting the control from "my arm", "my seat", to "the seat", "my jacket urges me to put it on me" and stuff... "I see council flats" is different to "council flats loom into my eyeline".... You wrote "lights litter the landscape" which gives the lights 'power' (compared to "the landscape is littered with lights") which works a treat... and the ending is just ace A real eerie, and certainly disturbing story. ... Again, I apologise if I'm getting silly with this. It's early/late and I tend to focus severely on someone's creative pieces and blabber non-stop. If i'm being a ****, just tell me! >_<
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er... Bulltown? Cowhouse? Oxfarm? :S Yes, I just looked up the world Aurochs, and clearly NO I do not know who it is...
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Lies :P That is all.
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good! It's like someone wearing a picasso t-shirt to an interview for an art placement... Try finding a Zola and you'll be away! Yeah there is :P depending on the course, of, er, course. My course is 7 hours a week, 3 days off plus weekends... I really ought to have a job I guess. 300 a month would be, what, 18-20 hours or something? If you find a job that's flexible enough then I'm sure you could do it, so long as you manage your actual reading work at the same time. It'll need to be flexible because your timetable will vary semester to semester. Perhaps don't aim for too many hours a week because you will want to socialise, you will want to chill out and, even though you won't want to, you will be required to do your own secondary reading/do essays (i imagine).
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it'sfalcoit'sfalcoit'sfalcoooo! Did you get grounded from teh internetz again or something? :P
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well i still need a lot of lists. A preliminary deadline of 'wednesday' for now, how's that? 15 people is an excellent number, but the more the merrier!
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aight coolsies, three more competitors enter the fray...
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Well it's financially viable to live off of the lone.. sorry, I mean SCRAPE a living off of it... I'm planning on getting a job now, 2nd year 2nd semester. Plenty of people get a job the first semester of the first year. Key is saving if you do get a job. As for paying it all off... I was told it's not 'til I earn 20k that I have to pay it, but yeah it's miniscule. I was told it was something like £8 a week. But all my loans added together... well it comes to a nice £18k debt that I'll pay off in a couple of hundred years. It's a bit crappy, really. I don't know. I just don't bother worrying about it, to be honest. Fuck money.
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I didn't realise we were supposed to pull coy/sex faces with the half-nakedness... BAD GIRLS! Lowering the tone of such a tasteful thread...
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What sort of loan are you talking about? Means tested loan/grant, or the typical student loan? Because everyone is entitled to the latter.
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oh no, don't get me wrong :P I watched the first four episodes eagerly, and would've watched the rest if I hadn't missed three in a row for various reasons
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lollololl! So does that mean that picture is actually of the two of you?
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californication is an easy-watching show. Did I mention CARNIVALE? because you need to watch it. *points at everyone at once*
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oooh edited post! I'm guessing you were told by the one wearing trousers not to reveal such information?
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Dexter, Carnivale, six feet under, heroes, hustle. ):D
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... O_O Letty that picture is actually a bit disturbing. You look like you just bit your own finger off...
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well maybe you just got to make Bluey famous... youtube? Crimewatch? Then you're just a third of the way there...
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As the saying goes; PIX OR IT NEVER HAPPENED. And besides, this compo isn't about pictures you've already got... perhaps you can use this thread as an inspiration to sort your life out and REACH FOR YOUR DREAMMMMS
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all three at once will definitely be worth bonus.
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Glow in the dark = winsex. I've got a bunch of glow in the dark stars that need putting-uppage, and I once had a set of pyjamas with the Tazmanian devil on them GLOWING IN DARKNESS! ... *tries to think of how a new thread can come from this*
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haha, awesome! Gotta love odd CD covers. I'm trying to think if I have any strange ones, but I don't think I do.
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They don't call me Fuzzy-eater for nothing. Gotta love head. Tasty!
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what?! that sounds a bit bonkers :S Not being able to close it, I mean.
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yeah well when your're six years old and your parents go away for a few days, what're you gonna do?