Dannyboy-the-Dane
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Posts posted by Dannyboy-the-Dane
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Tillykke med fødselsdagen!
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Why thank you, thank you very much
"I'm telling you, this is not how you have group sex!"
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i also stumbled across this letter before, quite funny lol..
anyone seen the one where some dude trys to exchange a picture of a spider for his bill? thats funny as fooook xD
I've seen that!
The way the bank accountant (or whatever) responds very politely is hilarious. -
I'm free! :p
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I also posted this in the other thread, but it's probably more appropriate here.
This page is absolutely brilliant. People post their own experiences with stupid, unfair, or just plain funny customers. Once you start reading them, it's hard to stop.
My all time favourite has to be this one. First time I read it, I literally ROFLMAO'd for about 5 minutes:
Paging Leonidas To The Front Desk
Hardware Store | New York, NY, USA
Customer: “Look! My friend told me I could get this type of hammer at your store! Now go get it for me!”
Cashier: “Sir, I already told you… we don’t have ANY hammers back here that aren’t already stocked on the shelves.”
Customer: “LOOK HERE. F**K YOU! I KNOW YOU’RE TRYING TO SAVE MONEY BY SWITCHING OUT YOUR STOCKS! GET ME THIS HAMMER!”
(At this point, I come to the front of the store, overhearing what’s going on; note that I’m the manager.)
Me: “Is there a problem?”
Customer: “Yes sir! Your employee here is not doing what I tell her to!”
Me: “Well, you need to calm down and understand that we don’t have what you’re looking for. So maybe you should go back to shelves and check–”
Customer: “F**K THAT!!! IT’S NOT THERE, OKAY?! YOU NEED TO F**KING GET ME WHAT I ASK FOR!”
Me: “That’s it. Get out of my store.”
Customer: “What? NO!”
Me: “Sir, get out, or I have to take you out.”
Customer: “Then do it!”
(I go around the counter and approach the customer. I yank him by his collar & drag him to the door.)
Me: “Now, then… you wanna apologize and maybe come back in?”
Customer: “No! I just want my hammer! God, what is this madness?!”
Me: *puts the customer down*
Customer: *confused* “… What is it?”
(I turn back to the cashier, who nods in approval. I then turn back to face the customer.)
Me: “Madness? THIS! IS! SPARTAAAAAAAAA!” *kicks customer out of store and slams door*
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Mousse my dear.
Way ahead of you, dear.
@ Skuny: Food is harder to write rap about that I thought. Apparently I'm better at talking shit to people. :p And I can't be assed to write such long verses.
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Chocolate mouse? An unusual item of food.
Gah, you know what I mean.
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Check this site and laugh your asses off:
The Customer Is Not Always Right
My absolute favourite has got to be this one:
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You're making me hungry with all that food rap.
I'm gonna need me some food soon, or I'm gonna snap.
I wanna start out with some eggs and some bac' (/beɪk/),
perhaps follow up with a lovely beef steak.
And then for dessert: The finest ice cream
with chocolate mousse - a lot! - a wonderful dream!
And to compliment this, I'd have some hot choc'
- I swear to you, friend: This dinner would rock!
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Yay! You even got the answer in Danish right!
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We rappin' about food? All right, let us see
if I can throw some lyrics at the B-E-A-T.
Food is a lov-e-ly thing, no doubt about that
- just watch out for those calories, 'cause they make you fat!
Some people just swallow it all without even trying
- I mean, how can you savour something you're not even enjoying?
Was that an intended pun? Go figure - I'm funky!
I think I'll grab a sandwich now, 'cause I'm feeling hungry!
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As great an energy source as nuclear power is, the consequences if it goes wrong are truly scary.
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Tillykke med fødselsdagen!
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I have a major thing for..."Tanned looking" guys (No I don't mean guys that go around wearing fake tan). Not girls, just guys. I don't get why it's only when it's a guy, but ahwell. Like the new guy in Skins, Freddie. He's totally average looking in reality, but in my eye's he's...so much more. :p
Are you sexually interested in both genders? Just curious.
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You are one mentally strong guy!
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i dont have a "thing" i like in girls. i find so many different kinda of girls hot, hair colour, skin colour, race, how they dress isnt an issue. hell, even body types vary wildly. just seems i either fancy em or i don't.
my ideal orgie would look like a united colours of benniton add.
Yeah, I don't really have a particular trait that is a must, either. It largely depends on the girl. Yet I do find a great personality to be a huge turn-on.
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when i was in cornwall with mates, i didnt get to pleasure myself for about 9 days.
walked past one of the girls in her room getting changed, door wide open, just changing from jogging bottoms to 3/4 shorts. totlay not bothered i could see her in bikini bottoms.
later that wee we had a play fight, she wrapped her legs round my waist and squeezed. i had 5 days back log of sperm and errections were on a hair trigger, some how, i kept my cool and there wasnt any prodding.
I admire your willpower. Heaven knows I couldn't have handled that.
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...Laurie?
That explains so much.
Or actually, it doesn't. It just sounded somehow appropriate to say.
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The male sex drive is a shitty thing. Being constantly ready for sex is pretty annoying.
Indeed, it would be nice to get rid of it once in a while. All joking aside, a girl wearing a shirt with a large cleavage is sometimes all it friggin' takes before one's concentration is severely hampered.
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Perhaps guys generally have a larger sex drive? I dunno.
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That's because everything Rez says is wrong. =P
But some things are more wrong than others.
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Oh crap, forgot to photograph my keyboard, but theres a Munchlax on my keyboard too. His head can be taken off and I fiddle with him all day. Like....I know every contour and my fingers know his definitions more than I know the wrinkles on my ball sack.
......
That sounded wrong in every possible way.
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Nor do you play football or go to school with a watermelon.
Nor with you.
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Bullshit..
Agreed. I don't play football every day, and I don't go to school in weekends and in the holidays.
Funny videos, flash games, etc
in General Chit Chat
Posted
ReZ, that theme song bit from that stand-up set is brilliant!
But the word play thingie ... holy shit, that's awesome! My jaw literally dropped when I realised the cleverness.
Without A Mushroom -
Behold! The Real Legend 3 is finally here!