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These are not personal experiences of mine. In the school paper at my grammar school there are always funny quotes from classes and these are some of my favourites:

 

The teacher to a third year class:

"You can be certain about two things in life: You're going to die, and you're going to an exam in this subject. Whether these two end up being one and the same event, only time will tell."

 

Analysis of a Greek poem in a second year class:

Teacher: "And what about Neoboule?"

Student: "He thinks that she is fat and has sexual affairs with too many men."

The teacher writes "FAT WHORE" on the blackboard.

 

I'm afraid I don't remember any personal experiences.

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