Ramar

Tesco are releasing new Oxo cubes in Spurs colours. Customers are told to look out for laughing stocks.

A man was found dead floating in the Thames, wearing a blond wig, full make-up, bra, knickers, suspenders and a Spurs shirt. Before informing the next of kin the police removed the Spurs shirt to save the family embarrassment.

A young boy goes to social services and tells them he has nowhere to live. What about your parents asks the social worker. No, they beat me, says the boy. What about your grandparents? says the social worker. No, they beat me even harder, says the boy. Well ... where do you want to stay then? replies the social worker. Tottenham, says the boy.They don't beat anyone.