Posted August 26, 2015 That would probably be true if he weren't currently with someone. He could dump her for the ex, then regret that and spend the rest of his life wondering "what if?" about the girl he dumped, especially if history repeats itself with the ex. Indeed. From the other side. I've been the girl four times now, where my partner has left me for their ex. Let me just say it does absolutely nothing for your confidence and absolutely nothing to help you trust the next person you decide to date. Do not stay with this girl if you even remotely think you might try to get back with the ex. It is not fair on her - at all. Never mind this grass is greener shite. I won't hear of it, either you forget about your ex and stay with this new lady or you let her go. There is no in between. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 26, 2015 And from the other side to the other side... I've broken up and gotten back together with the same girl like 4 times now.... with a few years in-between at stages... and I can honestly say that I never had plans to get back with her whilst with anyone else, and never left anyone because I wanted to get back with her. For the record, ahem. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 27, 2015 (edited) It's all circumstantial really. There are some circumstances in which I don't see any problem with getting back with your ex, some where I'd never get back with them, nor forgive them in other cases. In some extreme cases I will take a little joy and delight in any downfall of theirs too. Karma exists and I'm happy for it :p Edited August 27, 2015 by Kav Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 27, 2015 Interesting insights. I really try to think about a few months down the line if I were to get back with my ex and how that would feel knowing that she had been with my former friend for more than half a year which still makes me feel sick to my stomach somewhat. I think it's some kind of nostalgic reason I still long for her in a way and the fact that I want to prove that I can treat her the way she wanted and I wanted too... A part of me thinks I might never get over her because I don't have the feeling that we tried everything and failed. We broke up mainly because both of us were immature, made mistakes and were unable to communicate our feelings properly to each other. Now I've come to see things different through being with others and having broadened my horizons, so I think I just feel I want to show this to her. As for now, I just want to cut her out of my life and never see her again, because I am afraid I might fall for her again even if we would meet to just see how things are going as friends... But as a great friend I miss her also and I haven't met anyone yet who has her particular kind of personality. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 28, 2015 And from the other side to the other side... I've broken up and gotten back together with the same girl like 4 times now.... with a few years in-between at stages... and I can honestly say that I never had plans to get back with her whilst with anyone else, and never left anyone because I wanted to get back with her. For the record, ahem. Haha! Man that made me giggle more than it should, carry on @jayseven its been a long time. :awesome: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted August 31, 2015 Yeah, you definitely don't wanna mess up the relationship you're in. A big chunk of me still misses my ex, the one that had a breakdown, and finished with me to go sort himself out. Still hasn't and for a while he got back with his ex. I could have seen myself getting back with him until the ex was brought into the picture, oh and when I found out he started shagging round himself after he broke up with me. But, yes I agree that exs are exs for a reason. On a slightly unrelated topic, I had him on the phone not that long ago, apparently his ex wife was on that webcam embarrassing bodies clinic TV show, talking about how her hubby (at the time) had a giant penis.... and she didn't tell him... Now everyone knows he has a large penis and he HATES it. Who knew, a lot of men with large penises actually aren't that confident about it! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 1, 2015 Well I've been on a few dates now with a lovely lady it seems (I mean it seems she's lovely, not it seems she's a lady... she definitely is a lady, haha). It's been going really well and we get on amazingly, there's plenty of attraction too. It's nice having dates go well instead of going absolutely bonkers for a change! Haha Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 1, 2015 It's nice having dates go well instead of going absolutely bonkers for a change! Nice for you, boring for us :p Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 9, 2015 A girl at work who I quite liked and got on well with has just got engaged. I knew she was in a long term relationship, and never actually envisioned getting with her, but it just serves as a reminder that I'm still single while the dating pool is getting smaller. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 9, 2015 That's not true, people are being born all the time! And think of all those migrants/refugees coming in! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 9, 2015 A girl at work who I quite liked and got on well with has just got engaged. I knew she was in a long term relationship, and never actually envisioned getting with her, but it just serves as a reminder that I'm still single while the dating pool is getting smaller. I feel this way actually. Not long til I'm 30 I think i'm too independent & controlfreakish to accept a relationship. I went so long without one that I developed habits I couldn't get out of! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 10, 2015 I feel this way actually. Not long til I'm 30 I think i'm too independent & controlfreakish to accept a relationship. I went so long without one that I developed habits I couldn't get out of! I was exactly the same, spent a few years on my own. I definitely will say the biggest struggle for me (rather than my SO) has been this, I sometimes find it gets a bit too much to share everything with him. But thankfully, he's understanding and knows when to leave me be and give me peace (or in our case not come round one weekend). I think it'll be a challenge to live together, but I'm willing to try. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 10, 2015 Why do people go on dating sites if they have no intention of meeting people? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 11, 2015 Why do people go on dating sites if they have no intention of meeting people? I honestly think it's just to boost their confidence or ego. They want to feel the attention but not take it anywhere other than that. Or perhaps they're feeling down, after a break-up maybe, and just want to see how it could be for them getting back on the dating scene. Whatever the reason there are a few of them out there like that. In other news I'm off out with friends later and the girl I've been dating is coming along too... the friend test! Haha It's only been a month since we started dating, maybe 6 or 7 weeks since we started chatting but there's just that little something about her... she's great... I hope this works out! Haha Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 11, 2015 In other news I'm off out with friends later and the girl I've been dating is coming along too... the friend test! HahaIt's only been a month since we started dating, maybe 6 or 7 weeks since we started chatting but there's just that little something about her... she's great... I hope this works out! Haha We need crazy shit. Just kidding. Sounds good. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 13, 2015 (edited) Why do people go on dating sites if they have no intention of meeting people? The vast majority just want attention. Tinder is particularly bad for that. Like I've said before, I've seen women whos main picture is them self with their boyfriend, and even a couple wedding photos. I'm currently in a texting session with a woman who's suggesting she doesn't want to meet up in real life because she doesn't want to tell people "We met online". Still might be able to turn this around if it's not just an excuse for something else. Edit: And just got the "I've just realized I'm not looking for anything right now" text. Massive waste of my time. Edited September 13, 2015 by Emasher Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 13, 2015 Hate to be the one to say this, but you know that's a blatant excuse.. Women are generally bad at being honest/mean when it comes to dating. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 13, 2015 I actually finished reading this yesterday: Featured a fair few interviews and focus groups and it's amazing how many people say that they would prefer to be told straight out if someone wasn't interested in them, but the majority of the same people said they wouldn't be upfront about it if it went the opposite. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 13, 2015 Man there's some generalising going dooooown. Otherwise to @Ashley I would want to someone to be upfront in theory, but the reality is, that it kind hurts to find out someone doesn't want you, especially if it's so blunt! In the long term it would be appreciated. Because who wants to fawn over someone who does not care for you? Hmm? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 14, 2015 Hate to be the one to say this, but you know that's a blatant excuse.. Women are generally bad at being honest/mean when it comes to dating. I get that, but then why chat to me for ages but then go silent when I suggest meeting up? (Or agree to meet up, but later cancel and never rearrange.) I have had people who've genuinely had to cancel, and then have rearranged. But more often they've just never spoken again. I've also had somebody come back to me a day after rejecting me ("didn't feel any chemistry" -> "I think I was too hasty..."), 5 months after rejecting me ("I've only just left a relationship") and 8 months after rejecting me ("I don't really have time to date"). The first one we went on a further two dates before she said she's started seeing somebody else. The second one we went on one further date before she never responded to my text again. The third one we didn't go on any further dates as I'd moved cities. I get that it's easier to make excuses that to just say "I'm not really into you", I've done it myself, but it's the chatting for ages, often when they messaged me first - so it's not just like they responded out of politeness, but then an unwillingness to meet up. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 15, 2015 Talk is cheap. You're cheap! I kid, I kid. <3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 15, 2015 You're cheap! I kid, I kid. <3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted September 15, 2015 Talk is cheap. But that still begs the question of "why bother"? Why go on Tinder, swipe me right, message me first, continue to message me, but not want to meet up? Why do people go on dating sites if they have no intention of meeting people? The question still hasn't been answered. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
