Posted June 27, 2015 I've managed to move talking to one of the people from the dating site to WhatsApp (basically, I've got her number). Go Cube! Nicely done, that sounds pretty positive to me. I've been checking out the dating site again - despite giving up on it - messaged a few females on there but alas nothing, still never mind, it's my birthday on Monday, I have the week off so plenty to be positive about. : peace: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 Well, I've got a date with this girl next weekend. And there's only 8 years difference between us this time (instead of 9). I may have used the view from my new place to my advantage. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 I may have used the view from my new place to my advantage. Duuuuuudee! You invited her over? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 Duuuuuudee! You invited her over? Not quite. I showed her the picture and said that perhaps she'll see it for herself, to which she said "maybe I will", so we organised to meet up somewhere. Luckily, there are a couple of KFCs near here. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 Not quite. I showed her the picture and said that perhaps she'll see it for herself, to which she said "maybe I will", so we organised to meet up somewhere. Luckily, there are a couple of KFCs near here. I somehow matched with a guy on tinder (I swipe right without paying attention; assume he does the same). So far it's been great chat. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 I somehow matched with a guy on tinder (I swipe right without paying attention; assume he does the same). So far it's been great chat. Or, y'know, he's gay. It's not always an accident. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 Not quite. I showed her the picture and said that perhaps she'll see it for herself, to which she said "maybe I will", so we organised to meet up somewhere. Luckily, there are a couple of KFCs near here. If the date goes well, send her a photo of your bedroom ceiling. #playa Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 Or, y'know, he's gay. It's not always an accident. True, but that still wouldn't explain how he appeared in my tinder. Unless he's set his gender as female because he really want to turn straight guys. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 28, 2015 Ah. I have no idea how Tinder works. I thought guys being on it was normal. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 29, 2015 I somehow matched with a guy on tinder (I swipe right without paying attention; assume he does the same). So far it's been great chat. Love how you used this GIF! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 29, 2015 Love how you used this GIF! Knew you would. I was tempted to use my own video and turn it into a gif but I don't think it's quite good enough, so nobody else would realise what it was supposed to be. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 29, 2015 Erm...I think I may have accidentally asked her round to my place. I asked if she wanted to go to some other places after lunch, she said sure, then I said that I have the afternoon and evening free..and the said "Oh right, I understand :)". I was just saying it meaning "I'm not doing anything that day" but her reaction makes it seem like she thought I was suggesting something else...and that she likes the idea. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 29, 2015 (edited) Erm...I think I may have accidentally asked her round to my place. I asked if she wanted to go to some other places after lunch, she said sure, then I said that I have the afternoon and evening free..and the said "Oh right, I understand :)". I was just saying it meaning "I'm not doing anything that day" but her reaction makes it seem like she thought I was suggesting something else...and that she likes the idea. Love how you used this GIF! I just noticed that the gif I posted is in reverse to the one you used. Edited June 29, 2015 by MoogleViper Automerged Doublepost Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted June 29, 2015 Erm...I think I may have accidentally asked her round to my place. I asked if she wanted to go to some other places after lunch, she said sure, then I said that I have the afternoon and evening free..and the said "Oh right, I understand :)". I was just saying it meaning "I'm not doing anything that day" but her reaction makes it seem like she thought I was suggesting something else...and that she likes the idea. Time for good ol' Marshall Eriksen Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 (edited) I'm going through an extremely difficult time at the minute A few weeks ago my girlfriend told me that she was pregnant. She had carried out several tests and everything was dandy. We had been trying for the past 6 months so it wasn't a complete shock. However, as soon as she found out she was pregnant she became increasingly distant, a lot of crying and panicking. She lives with her mum and she wanted to spend an increasingly amount of time with her which resulted with less time with me. I put it all down to hormones On Monday, I texted her asking her if anything was wrong between the two of us. She replied stating that nothing was wrong, she loved me very much and that I should never think otherwise. The next morning, whilst I was at work she texted me: She had lost the baby. She was "glad" that she had lost the baby as she never wanted it She no long wanted to be with me. She said I was using her for her money and taking advantage of her. She immediately blocked me from everything. She has since been saying nasty things about me on both facebook and text to mutual friends. Whilst we were going out and from the very beginning she was extremely insecure and she continuously buy me gifts. She even bought me a PS4 and gave me 80 quid a month! I initially refused and we rowed. Eventually I used to accept everything just for a quieter life. Now, I accept im a dick for accepting everything and probably towards the end expecting things. I should have known better and just out right refused everything. I kept reassuring her that she did not have to buy me stuff and that I loved her. Thing is, she never believed I loved her. I have since written her a letter and posted it. I have said that I love her and that I was a dick for accepting the gifts and the money but I never intended to hurt her. I never realised that I was making her life a misery and that I love her very much. Obviously not received a reply. I'm absolutely devastated and been off work all week. I'm not a bad person but being told that she is glad the baby is gone and that i've taken advantage of her and that I have ruined her life has knocked me for six! Edited July 3, 2015 by Blade Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 Oh hang on that sounds exactly like she's gaslighting you. For those who might not know that term: gaslight ˈɡaslʌɪt/ verb gerund or present participle: gaslighting manipulate (someone) by psychological means into doubting their own sanity. Basically, she was the one who gave you that money, she offered it and beat you down til you accepted it. Now she's using that against you. I'd worry her whether or not she has actually lost this baby. Plus a number of other things. She seems incredibly unstable. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 Sounds like an awful situation, thoughts are with you @Blade. Emotions are clearly running high at the moment, losing a baby is a terribly saddening thing to go through. Perhaps in time things will calm down and things between you could be good again? Whatever happens, all of here on N-E are here for ya Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 Sorry to hear about that, @Blade. Nobody should have to go through that. I hope you're able to work through it and come out stronger at the other side. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 @Blade, that's rough man, sorry to hear that. Man hugs are coming your way! It's a tricky one. You didn't force her to buy you all of that stuff, she did it of her own will, so it's not right for her to use that against you. Sure, you might take that for granted after a while, who wouldn't? You're only human. It sounds to me like your girlfriend got overwhelmed with the situation. It's a big deal having a kid and I guess that made her anxious when she saw that it was finally becoming a reality, maybe. Hope you two can work it out and sorry to hear that you're having a bad time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 That sucks @Blade... Doesn't sound like a good situation to have been through, it sounds like @nightwolf may be right, although none of us know your girlfriend, the "gaslighting" does sound plausible. (I honestly didn't even know that was a term) Of course I hope not, perhaps things will work out? But... perhaps these things happen for a reason, not to be harsh as it doesn't sound like you've done anything wrong at all, maybe you're better off without her? Just trying to put a bit of perspective on things, feel free to disregard my comments though as I don't confess to knowing much about relationships at all being that I've only been in one once. ----------------------------------------------- When did relationships become so convoluted? A sweeping statement I know but it seems more and more it's becoming increasingly common to hear about relationships that get unnecessarily overcomplicated as opposed to being a straightforward case of... do you love each other? Y/N if Yes then yay! if not then oh well. TL;DR - I have no idea what I'm talking about but I'm sorry to hear that you're having a rough time Blade, we're here if you NEed us. : peace: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 That sounds awful, especially as it was a planned pregnancy. There isn't really anything I can say about that. On a good note, I'm really looking forward to my date tomorrow. We've been chatting all week and we seem to get on really well. Hopefully I can make a good post about it tomorrow (or perhaps, even better, the day after). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 I don't think there is any chance we will get back together. She has been posting on facebook that I have "destroyed" her, that I have "ruined her life" and that I have "financially and emotionally abused her" I think i'm going mad. Now I am not perfect and I have tons of faults but I treated her very well. I'm really sorry that she believes I didn't though. I can only sing her praises as to what she was like in the relationship - absolutely lovely, caring, beautiful. I've been looking through text messages etc and the majority of them are telling each other how much we love one another. Why is she saying these really hurtful and untrue things? She did the breaking up, glad that she miscarried and now she goes on facebook to bad mouth me. I have deactivated facebook but my friends keep texting with "do you want to see what she has put now". I'm like "not really but i've got to know" I'm losing mutual friends by the second. I've not said a bad word about her. I don't see what positive I would gain by this. Also the fact is that there was really nothing to bad mouth her about! I just want this nightmare to end and I want to get back to enjoying my life again. These last few days have been hell. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 It may suck now, but I imagine in the future I think you'll be thankful for all this. She sounds a bit mental and once all the hard stuff is over, you'll realise you've dodged the bullet so to speak. Just try and salvage whatever mutual friends you can and distract yourself as much as possible. If some do decide to "take her side", don't mourn the loss too much, they'll realise their mistake soon eventually. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 I don't think there is any chance we will get back together. She has been posting on facebook that I have "destroyed" her, that I have "ruined her life" and that I have "financially and emotionally abused her" I think i'm going mad. Now I am not perfect and I have tons of faults but I treated her very well. I'm really sorry that she believes I didn't though. I can only sing her praises as to what she was like in the relationship - absolutely lovely, caring, beautiful. I've been looking through text messages etc and the majority of them are telling each other how much we love one another. Why is she saying these really hurtful and untrue things? She did the breaking up, glad that she miscarried and now she goes on facebook to bad mouth me. I have deactivated facebook but my friends keep texting with "do you want to see what she has put now". I'm like "not really but i've got to know" I'm losing mutual friends by the second. I've not said a bad word about her. I don't see what positive I would gain by this. Also the fact is that there was really nothing to bad mouth her about! I just want this nightmare to end and I want to get back to enjoying my life again. These last few days have been hell. That sounds terrible, dude. Sorry to hear all of that. Have any of your mutual friends or her friends spoken to you about this stuff? Are they seeing that what she's saying isn't true? From somebody looking on the outside in, you've both been through a traumatic experience. Deep down, it probably is hurting her and maybe this is her way of dealing with the loss and the situation or how she's choosing to vent it. Sorry, man. I hope you get through this and quickly. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 3, 2015 @Fierce Link Nope, mutual friends have blocked me. My head is such a mess right now. Thanks for your and everyone elses support though! It is really appreciated! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
