Love? Relationships? Boy girl stuff? Complaints and appraisals! Gifs be welcome.

[Diageo]

I don't see any problem with giving up. The most important thing in life isn't finding a mate. As long as you're enjoying yourself you should be fine. Do what you want to do. Just don't moan here about it.

[MoogleViper]

Yeah, do whatever you want to do.

 

Unless whatever you want to do is mildly irritating for Diageo, then do something else.

[Diageo]

Yeah, do whatever you want to do.

 

Unless whatever you want to do is mildly irritating for Diageo, then do something else.

 

I'm glad someone understands the rules.

[drahkon]

Another little update.

She answered. Let me translate our brief conversation:

 

"Sorry, if I don't answer it's because I don't have a lot of time. I'm working in shifts and I have to study for some exams. So it's quite busy right now."

 

I'll say it again: Just say "no"

 

Anyway, my response was:

 

"No problem, if you find some time you can tell me, if you like. No sweat."

 

There's an 80% chance that she just wants to get rid of me and a 20% chance that she still thinks about going out with me.

I go with the 20%

 

Small edit: She just wrote "Ok, we'll see."

 

So 5% it is :p

Edited July 31, 2013 by drahkon

[Beast]

Another little update.

She answered. Let me translate our brief conversation:

 

"Sorry, if I don't answer it's because I don't have a lot of time. I'm working in shifts and I have to study for some exams. So it's quite busy right now."

 

I'll say it again: Just say "no"

 

Anyway, my response was:

 

"No problem, if you find some time you can tell me, if you like. No sweat."

 

There's an 80% chance that she just wants to get rid of me and a 20% chance that she still thinks about going out with me.

I go with the 20%

 

Small edit: She just wrote "Ok, we'll see."

 

So 5% it is :p

 

Ugh, I hate people like this! (no offence, dude, hehe).

 

If you don't want to go or you're not interested in somebody, JUST TELL THEM! It doesn't make you a bitch/twat/cunt/vagina-hole/etc, it makes you a respectful human being by not wasting yours or anyone else's time! You can say no and still be nice about it, it's called tact! You can just say "I really don't want to waste your time but I'm not into you but I do like you as a friend, I'll understand if you don't want to be mates but I hope we can...". There, done and dusted, what's so motherfuckin' hard about that shit right there? Nothing! It's honest, it's polite and it's truthful!

 

See, if that was me in your situation, drahkon, I wouldn't even bother. I just hate it when chicks say those two words: "We'll see". Bitch, do I look like I'm going to hang on and wait? Nuh-uh! You know if you like me or you don't so why not just bloody say! There's nothing at all to think aboot!

 

[/rant]

 

You're worth ten times more than a reply like that, mate. There'll be other chicks if she says no but if she says yes, good luck on your date!

[Ville]

@drahkon If she were really into you, she would make time to respond to you. No person on Earth is so busy that they can't find a few minutes to write a message.

 

Thus, either

 

a) axe her (literally or not, your choice)

b) confront her or

c) put some humour in there and try to get some kind of an emotional response from her.

[Blade]

Id just sack her off.

[drahkon]

@drahkon If she were really into you, she would make time to respond to you. No person on Earth is so busy that they can't find a few minutes to write a message.

 

Should've translated all of it :p

She actually said "If I don't answer immediately I forget to write later, because shifts/busy/exam"

It's a shitty excuse. But as I've said: I go with the 20%.

 

And by the way: We've been chatting since she answered me.

 

 

Yes, some people would axe her. Some people would confront her.

I like to play the game, even if there is none.

It can be annoying (as it was) but right now it's fun.

 

a) axe her (literally or not, your choice)

 

If I ever axe someone, it will be in the literal sense.

 

b) confront her

 

There is a chance that she'll be at a marksmen's festival (if you know what that is, as it is a German thing) on Saturday. If I see her, I will do exactly that.

 

c) put some humour in there and try to get some kind of an emotional response from her.

 

If there's anything I put in "there", it's..noooo, I won't go there.

[Beast]

I'm not going to give up on online dating but is it normal to give out one-word messages on them? I ask them a question and they're like "Yeah" or whatever one-word answer they say that's relevant. It's kind of like, I've taken all of this effort to message your arse, the least you can bloody well do is give me a good enough response. Ugh!

[Diageo]

I do that sometimes when I'm busy. I'll look at someone's message and think, "I'll answer that later". Then I'll forget and not answer for even a week.

[Emma]

If you got a message from someone you really liked, you'd message them straight back and would be keen to meet up. If the girl says she's too busy, move on to someone else, you're wasting your time.

 

When Dan and I started talking on OkCupid, we started chatting on a Sunday afternoon online. Within 4-5 hours we were at the local pub. I was meant to be busy planning lessons that night, but I still made the time. :-)

[Charlie]

There is a chance that she'll be at a marksmen's festival (if you know what that is, as it is a German thing) on Saturday. If I see her, I will do exactly that.

 

I'm going to assume there's some translation error here. What are you confronting her about? She said no.

[drahkon]

I'm going to assume there's some translation error here. What are you confronting her about? She said no.

 

I'm going to ask her whether she just wanted to find some excuses to get rid of me, or if it's true what she said.

And if the first is her answer, then I'll give her a bit of advice: Just say "no".

 

 

Oh..and...what's wrong with you guys/girl? I'm having fun even though it's a bit annoying.

[Blade]

I'm going to ask her whether she just wanted to find some excuses to get rid of me, or if it's true what she said.

And if the first is her answer, then I'll give her a bit of advice: Just say "no".

 

 

Oh..and...what's wrong with you guys/girl? I'm having fun even though it's a bit annoying.

 

Why bother??

 

Seems to me that shes not interested.

 

As this appears to be the case I would move on.

 

Like people have said you make an effort to see someone if you like them. This applies to both friends and potential love interests.

[drahkon]

As this appears to be the case I would move on.

 

I actually already moved on.

Besides me asking her out twice I didn't even once start a conversation.

If I see her on Saturday I'll give her some advice on how to deal with questions like "Do you want to go out with me?". That's it.

 

You all make it sound like I desperately want her to go out with me and that I keep chasing her.

I don't. This is fun and games.

I played my part and now I wait.

[Eenuh]

It seems a bit silly/petty to immediately dismiss someone and ignore them just because they didn't agree to go out with you yet when you have asked once or twice (this is not aimed at you drahkon but at the other comments).

 

People might genuinely be busy when they say they are, doesn't mean they are not interested. However if they keep saying they are busy over a longer period of time, that is when you can start saying "this isn't really worth it".

 

Remember that he is not asking her this stuff on a dating site, so it is not like she has put herself out there for dating.

[Beast]

If you got a message from someone you really liked, you'd message them straight back and would be keen to meet up. If the girl says she's too busy, move on to someone else, you're wasting your time.

 

When Dan and I started talking on OkCupid, we started chatting on a Sunday afternoon online. Within 4-5 hours we were at the local pub. I was meant to be busy planning lessons that night, but I still made the time. :-)

 

This. If she's interested, she'll make time. I made time to talk to a couple of girls I've liked even though I've been busy. What's wrong with a simple "yes, when and what day?" or "No, thanks though". It takes 5 seconds to reply, it's not as if you're writing a ten-page essay or something.

 

Why bother??

 

Seems to me that shes not interested.

 

As this appears to be the case I would move on.

 

Like people have said you make an effort to see someone if you like them. This applies to both friends and potential love interests.

 

Yeah, I can't see the point in playing this game either but then again, I suppose I'm straight to the point. I can't be doing with all of these "maybe"s and "I don't know"s, you do know whether you want to date someone or go out with someone so why say I don't know, if you're saying that, it's obvious you should say no.

 

I actually already moved on.

Besides me asking her out twice I didn't even once start a conversation.

If I see her on Saturday I'll give her some advice on how to deal with questions like "Do you want to go out with me?". That's it.

 

You all make it sound like I desperately want her to go out with me and that I keep chasing her.

I don't. This is fun and games.

I played my part and now I wait.

 

Sorry, mate. I didn't mean it to. I know you're not desperate but when people say "I don't know" or shit, wanting people to beg them to go out or something, it irks me. It's like, I had this friend who did exactly the same trick and it pissed me off to no ends. I used to ask if he wanted to go out for a pint on the night and he used to say "I don't know", I asked "Why?" and he used to say "I don't know whether I can be arsed"..."So basically, you don't really want to go or you do?", "I don't know" so I just said "If you don't want to go, SAY you don't want to go" and then he simply said I don't want to go and I was fine with that, just don't bastard play that stupid shite with me. LOL!

 

It seems a bit silly/petty to immediately dismiss someone and ignore them just because they didn't agree to go out with you yet when you have asked once or twice (this is not aimed at you drahkon but at the other comments).

 

People might genuinely be busy when they say they are, doesn't mean they are not interested. However if they keep saying they are busy over a longer period of time, that is when you can start saying "this isn't really worth it".

 

Remember that he is not asking her this stuff on a dating site, so it is not like she has put herself out there for dating.

 

For me, it's not that they disagreed, I'd be perfectly happy with taking no for an answer, it's just when people say "I don't know" or something. You do know whether you can or can not or want or do not want to go anywhere so why say "I don't know"? As I mentioned above, people, for some reason, like it when others bug them and say "Ah c'mon, come out with us" or something and I'm not into it. When I say yes or no, I mean yes or no. You'll always get a straight answer.

 

To be fair to that one Eenuh, that is true but how long does it take to type a reply? It's cool if you've forgotten but when you remember, you could easily say yes or no instead of "I don't know". I like people who know their own minds and not play games like that.

 

I also agree with this too but didn't she imply that she liked him though? (Genuine question, I forgot)

[Charlie]

It seems a bit silly/petty to immediately dismiss someone and ignore them just because they didn't agree to go out with you yet when you have asked once or twice (this is not aimed at you drahkon but at the other comments).

 

People might genuinely be busy when they say they are, doesn't mean they are not interested. However if they keep saying they are busy over a longer period of time, that is when you can start saying "this isn't really worth it".

 

If someone asked me out for a specific time/place and I was genuinly busy I would suggest an alternative date.

 

If it was a general asking out for some time in the future if I really wanted to see the girl I would make time for her.

 

I take it if that the girl doesn't suggest an alternative or explicitly say she's interested then she isn't. It's just people trying to let you down nicely.

[Beast]

I know how everybody thinks it's the best way to let someone down gently but I don't think it is. What I mean is, I do agree that it's them letting you down gently but I don't agree that that technique actually is...I hope this makes sense!

 

To me, it's just messing you about. I'd rather know there and then if you like me or not. If you know there is a slight possibility, you'd say yes. If you have to THINK about it, it's going to be a no. I don't like doubters, either go with the flow or just say no!

[drahkon]

Sorry, mate. I didn't mean it to. I know you're not desperate but when people say "I don't know" or shit, wanting people to beg them to go out or something, it irks me.

 

No need to be sorry I know what you mean, and I agree: her response was shitty.

 

Still, I don't understand what all the fuss is about.

 

I'm waiting. Not actively, if that makes any sense.

I asked her out twice. Now it's time for her to make a move.

 

If she doesn't (which seems to be the most probable outcome), fine.

If she does, fine.

And that's the game that I'm 'playing'.

 

No idea, why you all keep saying that she could fuck off (in a sense :p ).

 

Like @Eenuh said, no need to dismiss her completely. I did my job, I made a move. Nothing else for me to do.

And I bother giving her advice because I think she is a nice girl and that she should do things 'properly'.

[Ville]

@drahkon Ah, ok. So your constant "wish she would just say no" -posts were nothing but you actually being happy! I get it now, you actually like the wait, you revel in it! Well congrats man, I think she might be the one! :heart:

[drahkon]

 

 

It seems it would be better if I stopped posting about these things.

[Ville]

Come on man, don't be so serious. Hope you level her with your über German man charm (and sense of humour, har har).

[Aneres11]

Being gay is gay. And I'm a crap gay.

 

My situation is still shitty. Liking someone you shouldn't is not cool. Nuh-uh.

[Josh64]

Being gay is gay. And I'm a crap gay.

 

My situation is still shitty. Liking someone you shouldn't is not cool. Nuh-uh.

 

I know man, have a hug off me.

 

I'd say try and carry on being friends but if it keeps upsetting you this much then perhaps spending less time with him is the only option. It's probably not what you want to hear but you don't want to get all hung up on someone you have no chances with.