Kurtle Squad

Love? Relationships? Boy girl stuff? Complaints and appraisals! Gifs be welcome.

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It doesn't take much to remember someone's name! My sister is called Kate and it annoyed us both when she got called Katie. Don't do eet!

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One spelling mistake and it's all over. Online dating: taking anal-retentiveness to a whole new level...

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So if someone kept calling you vile in real life instead of Ville (on the basis that is your real name :p) you wouldn't have any problems with it?

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So if someone kept calling you vile in real life instead of Ville (on the basis that is your real name :p) you wouldn't have any problems with it?

 

But this is a case of someone spelling your name wrong on one occasion.

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Yeah it sounds a massive over-reaction for just one incident. Are you sure she was't joking though? Maybe it was a, "you don't know me wel enough yet ;) *wink wink nudge nude8" sort of thing, and it just didn't come across very well.

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So the girl says she really likes me yadda yadda but wants an open relationship. She even went on a date with another guy yesterday. I mean, fair enough, we weren't a couple or anything, but this kinda sucks. Anyone been in an open relationship before?

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I messaged someone and she had a go at me because I spelled Kate (her name) with an "i". I apparently needed to get her prior consent before I would be allowed to "cutesy up" her name.
I don't understand why you went with a name different to the one she told you? She goes by Kate... call her Kate! It just makes you seem like you weren't paying attention otherwise.
So the girl says she really likes me yadda yadda but wants an open relationship. She even went on a date with another guy yesterday. I mean, fair enough, we weren't a couple or anything, but this kinda sucks. Anyone been in an open relationship before?
I dunno, maybe @Dyson. Didn't he have something with his girlfriend who couldn't decide if she was a lesbian or not or something? Might be a different situation and also might be massively incorrect! :p

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I think open relationships can work if you're both open (teehee) to the idea, but they won't work if you want different things. If it's going to bother you whenever she goes out with someone else, then maybe it's not for you. :heh:

 

Plus it depends on what your expectations are. Is this just going to be a fun thing where you go out/have sex with each other but it's nothing serious? Or is there the potential for something more serious where you're both exclusive to each other? Or maybe you'd decide to become a couple but still have an open relationship. Make sure you're on the same page.

 

So, erm... do whatever feels right for you, I don't care. :p

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I think open relationships can work if you're both open (teehee) to the idea, but they won't work if you want different things. If it's going to bother you whenever she goes out with someone else, then maybe it's not for you. :heh:

 

Plus it depends on what your expectations are. Is this just going to be a fun thing where you go out/have sex with each other but it's nothing serious? Or is there the potential for something more serious where you're both exclusive to each other? Or maybe you'd decide to become a couple but still have an open relationship. Make sure you're on the same page.

 

So, erm... do whatever feels right for you, I don't care. :p

 

I really don't know mate, it seems more of the 'have fun' ilk at the moment, though we both agreed there may be something there between us should things become more romantic down the line, it's just not what she's after right now. I'm not too bothered about her seeing other people as long as I still get to see her, but the thing is I don't have much chance to meet other people myself, hence the website, so its not really equal at the moment unless I spend time trying to chat to other girls online, which I really can't be arsed to do half the time!

 

So yeh, meh, will see what happens. Could be good or bad.

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Plus if you're looking for a serious relationship, how do you drop the fact that you've basically got a friend with benefits? Do you stop seeing this other girl, or do you then start trying to get a string of open relationships going? :P

 

I think there's an acceptible amount of 'seeing others' while dating early on. I think it's perhaps unnecessary to label what things are before they've even started. Surely you only think about 'down the line' when you've actually left the station? You're not in a relationship with her yet.

 

Personally I'm quite the beta male, so I'd hate it.

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So the girl says she really likes me yadda yadda but wants an open relationship. She even went on a date with another guy yesterday. I mean, fair enough, we weren't a couple or anything, but this kinda sucks. Anyone been in an open relationship before?

 

Sounds a bit 500 days of summer to me, where the girl keeps the guy on for fun until something she really wants comes along. How many dates have you been on with her? I'd hold out for someone else who likes you just as much as you like them. :-)

 

So the girl says she really likes me yadda yadda but wants an open relationship. She even went on a date with another guy yesterday. I mean, fair enough, we weren't a couple or anything, but this kinda sucks. Anyone been in an open relationship before?

 

Sounds a bit 500 days of summer to me, where the girl keeps the guy on for fun until something she really wants comes along. How many dates have you been on with her? I'd hold out for someone else who likes you just as much as you like them. :-)

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Plus if you're looking for a serious relationship' date=' how do you drop the fact that you've basically got a friend with benefits? Do you stop seeing this other girl, or do you then start trying to get a string of open relationships going? :P

 

I think there's an acceptible amount of 'seeing others' while dating early on. I think it's perhaps unnecessary to label what things are before they've even started. Surely you only think about 'down the line' when you've actually [i']left[/i] the station? You're not in a relationship with her yet.

 

Personally I'm quite the beta male, so I'd hate it.

 

Yeah well I guess that's the only hope isn't it, that it's just early stages dating around. You're right though, it is stupid to try and define stuff so early.

 

 

Sounds a bit 500 days of summer to me, where the girl keeps the guy on for fun until something she really wants comes along. How many dates have you been on with her? I'd hold out for someone else who likes you just as much as you like her.

 

That was my thinking too. I said that as well, I was quite honest like, I ain't gonna be strung along like some chump. You're probably right though, meeting somebody who's looking for something more might be the best thing to do. I guess in the meantime though it can't hurt to play things out with this one either :p

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Plus if you're looking for a serious relationship' date=' how do you drop the fact that you've basically got a friend with benefits?

[/quote']

 

Yeah, an open relationship is essentially just a fuck buddy that you have to wine and dine.

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I wouldn't go for an open relationship, it just spells disaster and it's going to get messy....emotionally...and maybe physically....

 

I'm in a bit of a pickle anyways but at the same time, I know I'm not. There was this girl that I did really like and she's everything I did look for in a girl. However she comes out with the oddest of things and it's kind of put me off her. Everybody's saying how it's obvious that I like her and, at first, yeah I did but as time went on, I'm just thinking she's a bit...well...weird is a strong word but odd sounds about right.

 

Basically she's a girl from work and a guy from work who figured it out were saying how I should just ask her out and stuff but I knew she never liked me in that way and the things that she's told me, I was put off anyway. He said it's obvious I liked her but I said "I don't know, I kind of do and then I don't". We are pretty much alike personality-wise but then she'll say the oddest things that just make me wonder a bit.

 

She did the thing that is one of my pet hates. "All men are the same". I can't stand it when a woman says that and I don't like it when it's swapped the other way around. She had experiences where a man in her life cheated and all of a sudden, we're tarred with the same brush. I told her that I would never cheat and stuff and she were like "Yes you would, it's embedded in you to do it" and I said how I were cheated on before and how I hated the feeling of it and I even said considering she's gone to college and university, how small-minded it was of her to say that and in the end, she backtracked a bit and said "Women can do it too".

 

Second thing that is a bit of an issue is that she said all her previous relationships never worked because they weren't from Ireland or didn't have Irish blood. I stood there and said "No, the relationship not working had NOTHING to do with what blood courses through your veins but to do with the personalities or behaviour from either one of you" but I think it fell on deaf ears.

 

Last thing was yesterday. She said to me yesterday that she suspected people were talking about her behind her back and started to go off on one. I said they're just wondering why you're being a bit weird with me since you weren't yourself today. She then asked what I meant and I said we were alike and we're always laughing and stuff and today she wasn't and I said that people were saying we were like a married couple and stuff and she flew off the handle. I made a joke and said "Cheers, I'm not that bad, y'know!" and she just carried on going off on one and then saying how she's going to talk to people and have it out with them and I'm like "Woah! What are you on about? Just listen, nobody's talking about you, calm the hell down woman!". However, she did say to a couple of people that out of all of the boys, I'd be her ideal boyfriend and stuff like that so that didn't help at all and I only told that one person but that was because he figured it out himself and I know, for a fact, he ain't said anything.

 

 

So now I'm put off and we have a laugh and she's alright but...wow...she's a laugh and I like her as a mate but that's it. Craziness! It's like I never left school, lmfao.

Edited by Animal

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It doesn't sound like she's that weird. In fact, whilst very annoying, a lot of the things you've quoted do sound quite typical of a lot of women.

 

I say, although this is coming from a coward who doesn't practise what he preaches, just go for it. Frankly a bit of oddness could keep the relationship interesting, and prevent it from becoming stale. If it works out, great, if not, you've got some valuable relationship experience and had a bit of fun along the way.

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Dazz, she just sounds immature to me - which will/may change in time. To echo Moogle, go for it - you'll probably be a good influence on her :)

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As I said, weird was a strong word but odd sounds right. The thing is, I'm odd. I know I am. People think I'm things I'm not and I'm always laughing and probably not taking things too seriously most of the time but she says and thinks things that aren't the good kind of odd.

 

I know women say this but I expect them to say it to other women who are going through a rough patch with their boyfriend considering that is said a lot around that time, not just out of nowhere. It's not just that, it's also the blood thing too and the other side to her that I saw yesterday...I don't know...

 

I mean, she's fun and stuff but I'm sure she doesn't like me in that way and if I do ask her out and she says no, there'd be that awkwardness at work. Well, I wouldn't feel awkward because I'd just say "Okay" and move on like I usually do but I can tell she's the type who wouldn't let it go for a while. Also, she wants someone who drinks a lot and I don't really do that. I can let myself go on occasions and drink a load of pints and still be standing.

 

But yeah, I am pretty sure she doesn't like me in that way anyways, which is a shame and at the same time, it isn't.

 

=

 

That aside, I also have a promising situation as well. One of my girl mates has rang me up who I haven't spoken to in ages and we started talking and stuff. Anyway, she said that I should stay over at hers one of the nights. I said we should and then she went on to say that her family go out on some weekends and she said we should spend the night together. No idea when it'll happen though (probably never) but I thought it was something to share with you all anyways, lmao.

 

Dazz, she just sounds immature to me - which will/may change in time. To echo Moogle, go for it - you'll probably be a good influence on her :)

 

True, however I just don't want to go for someone who's immature again. It just seems to end in such disaster when I do go for it. I like a bit of immaturity in a relationship but not in the sense of making a mountain out of a molehill kind of thing, which is what she did yesterday. I don't think she likes me in that way anyway though, I can tell a little bit. I'm in mixed feelings about her. I do really like her and I like her as something else but then I don't in that way. I don't know. Also, there's work to think about, if it ends bad it'll screw both me and her up and if she says no (which I think she would), it'll be awkward for her. Ugh, I'm a mess! lmao.

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It's not just that, it's also the blood thing too and the other side to her that I saw yesterday...

 

I know it's annoying, but periods are just something women go through. there's nothing that can be done about that.

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I know it's annoying, but periods are just something women go through. there's nothing that can be done about that.

 

21931d1345989108-what-alternative-gaming-happy-i-see-what-you-did-there.png

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True, however I just don't want to go for someone who's immature again. It just seems to end in such disaster when I do go for it. I like a bit of immaturity in a relationship but not in the sense of making a mountain out of a molehill kind of thing, which is what she did yesterday. I don't think she likes me in that way anyway though, I can tell a little bit. I'm in mixed feelings about her. I do really like her and I like her as something else but then I don't in that way. I don't know. Also, there's work to think about, if it ends bad it'll screw both me and her up and if she says no (which I think she would), it'll be awkward for her. Ugh, I'm a mess! lmao.

 

Summary: it'd be more sensible not to go for it then? :) I was approaching it from the assumption that you still liked her lots, but it seems like you're not sure. You can tell a lot from how someone acts - she'd probably be making mountains of your own issues if you were together, instead of/along with work/everyday life. idk though, your call :p

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Summary: it'd be more sensible not to go for it then? :) I was approaching it from the assumption that you still liked her lots, but it seems like you're not sure. You can tell a lot from how someone acts - she'd probably be making mountains of your own issues if you were together, instead of/along with work/everyday life. idk though, your call :p

 

That's precisely what I thought. Like I like the fun side of her and everything like that and yesterday, there was a moment when I thought she were having me on when she were getting peeved about the whole 'paranoid' thing but she actually was getting upset by it and I'm like "Geez, it's not that big a deal!"

 

I mean, when I started work, there were two people who weren't sure if I were gay or straight and they asked me and I said I was straight and that was it. No drama, that was the end of that, we moved on. With her, someone laughed and it was uproar and I was like "Is there any need?". I then thought of what would happen if we had a small issue in the relationship and how it would be treated. I'd treat it like it is but I think she'd magnify it after what I saw yesterday. Totally odd.

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@Jav_NE: Open relationships ... yeah, as Magnus says, it's all about wanting the same thing. To be honest, it sounds more like she's just looking for a casual fling, but I could be wrong. Of course, nobody's tied down in the initial phase of a relationship, but if you're at the point where you're talking about the nature of it, I'd say you're past that phase; at that point I'd personally want to know where you both stand.

 

It's up to you if you're interested in an open relationship/possibly a fling. :)

 

@Animal: I'm with Eddie here, she sounds way too immature. "All men are the same, cheating is in the blood, which by the way has to be Irish"? And none of those things were said in jest? Plus the drama. Yeah, I'd personally stay away. o_o

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