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bad stuff thread.

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On the living with people topic..... So so glad I live on my own. Not in the biggest of places - 1 bed flat, but the bedroom is a good size and so is the one living room/dining room area. But my stuff is mine and no fecker steals it. No one wastes my electricity but me :heh:

 

On another note - my life is in a really good place, but the emotional side is a complete train wreck. I really need a hug and a box of kittens :(

Edited by Raining_again

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@Iun, I am so sorry for your loss. You know where I am if you ever want to message me.

 

@Serebii, I know it's something that you know but the worst thing you can do is look on the Internet and self-diagnose. I know it's hard to say and it's easier said than done but don't think about it because 95% of the time, it's not going to be anything you think it is or it's not going to be as bad as it is. Don't sweat it, enjoy your Christmas, be merry and catch some Pokemon!

 

@Raining_again, you can message me any time you want to and talk if you want and I know it's not much but hugs!

 

HUGZ FOR EVERYONEZ! :heart:

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So, a couple of months ago, something appeared on my forearm. I first thought it was a bite but it didn't go when another bite from around the same time came.

 

Two months later, it's still here. Over the past couple of months, I have been absentmindedly scratching it which has caused it to harden and have a scrab like texture on the top, but I did something stupid today and googled what it could be, and now I'm terrified. It could be a wart or something similar, but it could be...well yeah. It matches multiple possibilities.

 

I recently made an appointment with my doctor for it, but the earliest he could see me is 6th of January so I am starting to lose my mind :/

 

Good luck, brah. Not really a lot anyone can say to make you feel better, as it must be an agony to wait. Like you said, there are multiple possibilities, so it doesn't mean it's all bad news yet. Pretty shit that the doctor couldn't get you an earlier appointment, though.

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My mind always goes to the worst case scenario, but something like this...the possibility is too much for me. Going to try and get an earlier appointment tomorrow, even if it's not with my GP

 

@Serebii, I know it's something that you know but the worst thing you can do is look on the Internet and self-diagnose. I know it's hard to say and it's easier said than done but don't think about it because 95% of the time, it's not going to be anything you think it is or it's not going to be as bad as it is. Don't sweat it, enjoy your Christmas, be merry and catch some Pokemon!

 

I know. It's just the idea that's getting at me.

 

Should have had it lopped off the moment it appeared...that's part of what the scratching was trying to do.

Edited by Serebii
Automerged Doublepost

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My mind always goes to the worst case scenario, but something like this...the possibility is too much for me. Going to try and get an earlier appointment tomorrow, even if it's not with my GP

 

 

 

I know. It's just the idea that's getting at me.

 

Should have had it lopped off the moment it appeared...that's part of what the scratching was trying to do.

 

As I said, I know it's hard but try not to think of the worst case scenario because it might not even be that. If you can't get an earlier appointment, which I REALLY hope you do, try not to let it ruin your Christmas.

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My mind always goes to the worst case scenario, but something like this...the possibility is too much for me. Going to try and get an earlier appointment tomorrow, even if it's not with my GP

 

 

 

I know. It's just the idea that's getting at me.

 

Should have had it lopped off the moment it appeared...that's part of what the scratching was trying to do.

 

Dude, according to the internet, I have Asperger's Syndrome, I'm a psychopath and I probably have skin cancer. Don't do it to yourself.

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Got an expedited appointment on Friday.

 

Spoke to the duty doctor and she thinks, from my description, that it's probably just a new mole (which would be unsightly and I'd want removed) or something else that's nothing to worry about, but has booked me in just to make sure.

 

All I had to say to get through to duty doctor was "growth"

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Sometimes i hate my parents. My Mum asked me to have a look at the PC because it was "running slow" as she put it and had a strange pop-up appear. 2 hours later (and 2 virus's, 6 malware programs and uninstalling 6 junk programs. Oh and also cleaning out the registry) and i got it back to full speed. I've no idea how she got it that bad, considering it needs my Dad's password to install anything.

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Sometimes i hate my parents. My Mum asked me to have a look at the PC because it was "running slow" as she put it and had a strange pop-up appear. 2 hours later (and 2 virus's, 6 malware programs and uninstalling 6 junk programs. Oh and also cleaning out the registry) and i got it back to full speed. I've no idea how she got it that bad, considering it needs my Dad's password to install anything.

 

Must be all that porn she's watching, brah.

 

MEET SEXY RUSSIANS IN YOUR AREA.

THESE BORED HOUSEWIVES JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN.

THIS WOMAN'S BRA JUST FELL OFF. YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.

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I suppose it's easily done! The problem we have is technology is really easy (for the most part) for us to use, whereas some generations and others in general just simply have no idea.

 

At least you fixed it! Hopefully your mum appreciated it :)

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Got to catch my train home in about an hour and feeling that pre-home anxiety. Just the thought of spending a few days where I can't relax (not in my own home), constantly got to be 'on', can't be myself etc has got me kind of tied up in knots. It'll be fine in the end, but the thought about it beforehand always gets me like this. It's terrible but I crave coming back. I end up missing London and missing my life, and of course then feeling guilty about not wanting to be back at home.

 

Oh the holidays...

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Must be all that porn she's watching, brah.

 

MEET SEXY RUSSIANS IN YOUR AREA.

THESE BORED HOUSEWIVES JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN.

THIS WOMAN'S BRA JUST FELL OFF. YOU WON'T BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.

 

I think she was subject to the last one (those stupid "click here to see what happens next facebook videos")

 

I suppose it's easily done! The problem we have is technology is really easy (for the most part) for us to use, whereas some generations and others in general just simply have no idea.

 

At least you fixed it! Hopefully your mum appreciated it :)

 

She did, i'm just waiting for the next time (it's happened twice this year already)

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So, got side effects from the cryotherapy for my arm growth. I'm now completely and utterly ill as my immune system is dealing with that, I now have the flu.

 

Fantastic. Merry Christmas.

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Christmas is almost over. Thank god. Loud and overactive family members. Gifts I "need" but don't want. Watching lame 90's christmas romance movies for the umptheenth time. Sleeping on a coach. Aside from the food I don't look forward to Christmas. No drunken father or poor family or another sob story about my childhood. Christmas is just completly opposite of me. I like silence. I like my bed. My own bed. I like watching this year's movies. Once. Social activity is fine. For a few hours at a time. Days in a row makes me exhausted and bored. I can't just leave because buses still don't go so I'm depended on mother's willingness to drive me home.

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Things got bad today at work but sorted itself out again. Basically, I sold a customer an aftershave for £18 but he came back and was charged £20. The labels were stuck on as £18 on my till but £20 on another so I said I'd honour it anyway (even though he was still insistent on saying he had rights but it's Christmas so I wasn't going to bother). Anyway, I go out the back and my manager tells me it's always been £20 and that I shouldn't have left the label at £18.

I apologised and said I never saw it and I just put it out. An honest mistake.

My assistant manager, who's just THERE, says "I did actually tell you it was £20! I told you the price of all of them! Know your prices!"

I said "You didn't. All you said to me was you would bring more out to me and that if I needed anymore, just ask you. Nothing else"

She was saying "Yeah I did, I told you the prices to all of them and I told you five minutes before you went out" which is complete bullshit.

I just said "Why are you lying to make yourself look good and make me look bad in the process? You're already an assistant manager, what good would you get out of bullshitting to the manager? Brownie points? Stop making stuff up!"

Anyway, she was absolutely insistent and I said "Tell you what, my Christmas ain't being ruined with yet another migraine so I'm just going to leave it how it is. If you can live in a world where you believe your lies, I'm cool with that" and just walked away.

My manager asked if I was okay. Just said I was sick of her lying, making me look bad. She told me not to worry, to have a cake and she gave me a present so that was cool. Later on, my assistant manager apologised to me, I just said "It's Christmas, we're all stressed. Let's put it behind us" and that were that.

 

On the bright side, my assistant manager was my Secret Santa and she got me The Godfather Trilogy Coppola Restoration on blu-ray so, y'know, not a total cow, haha.

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Well, have to congratulate my sister for reducing my Mum to tears (and not of joy). She said she's coming up for Boxing Day to spend a few days with us, then coming up again early in the New Year before she heads off to a 6 month slot on a cruise ship. She said even up to this morning she's coming up. And now at 1pm, she says she's not coming at all. She keeps doing this all the time, it's got to the point that i just stopped giving a monkeys about her. I know that is hard to say, but it is. Every time she says she's coming, it's a last minute excuse. She's kind of ruined my Mum's Christmas, and i think this time this will push me into the "try not to even talk to her anymore" category.

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Well, have to congratulate my sister for reducing my Mum to tears (and not of joy). She said she's coming up for Boxing Day to spend a few days with us, then coming up again early in the New Year before she heads off to a 6 month slot on a cruise ship. She said even up to this morning she's coming up. And now at 1pm, she says she's not coming at all. She keeps doing this all the time, it's got to the point that i just stopped giving a monkeys about her. I know that is hard to say, but it is. Every time she says she's coming, it's a last minute excuse. She's kind of ruined my Mum's Christmas, and i think this time this will push me into the "try not to even talk to her anymore" category.

 

This may sound trite, but I've found that the best way to avoid family bullshit is for them to be in an entirely different country. And then just see them once a year. And they call you on your birthday - if they remember.

 

It's also incredibly sobering and lonely. BUT: the bullshit factor is reduced to zero.

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This may sound trite, but I've found that the best way to avoid family bullshit is for them to be in an entirely different country. And then just see them once a year. And they call you on your birthday - if they remember.

 

It's also incredibly sobering and lonely. BUT: the bullshit factor is reduced to zero.

 

She's the only one that seems to be the problem as it were, everyone else in my family is fine. I did send her a text saying that i wasn't happy with her. She goes away for 6+ months in January, so maybe she'll change then.

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She's the only one that seems to be the problem as it were, everyone else in my family is fine. I did send her a text saying that i wasn't happy with her. She goes away for 6+ months in January, so maybe she'll change then.

 

Sorry to say... don't count on it.

 

Sometimes our siblings need to be thoroughly and convincingly cut off. I'm guessing you're the one who has most of his shit together in your family? Therefore you've always been the one to see the needless and copious amounts of leeway and "last chances" given to your more unreliable siblings, and in a schadenfreude-hope-they-get-their-godamn-comeuppance kind of way, resent being the stupid bastard born with an ounce of responsibility.

 

I'm speaking from personal experience here, but it took my fecal-matter-in-skin brother being rendered homeless twice to turn himself around. My sister, who has always been in a bubble that includes her and my stepmother alone, has NEVER ever in her life felt like the shit has the potential to hit the fan if she pushes it ONE MORE TIME. And d'you know what? Much as I love my niece, and as glad as I am my sister is finally getting into part-time work after years of being a shitty, shiftless layabout: she needed a smack in the teeth aged about 15 the time she "ran away from home" when my stepmother half-heartedly forbade her from seeing one of the local scumbags. I spent an evening searching the fields with my father and the police, until she came home to very open arms and a declaration of "that sort of thing, you can't explain, but I understand why you ran off, I'll be a better mother". Fuck.

 

And your sister, if she's willing to break your mother's heart like that at Christmas, needs to be definitiviely told that she's got work to do. Love, true love, may be unconditional: but the people who love you need better than recent performance to trust you with their love again. Until such time as you are able to show maturity, selflessness and common decency, your sister needs to be left out of the circle. No birthday cards, no weekly calls, no attempts to make the peace. It's on her, and until she has proved that she's worthy of the love, kindness and consideration that she's given, she's on the shit list.

 

I really feel for your mother, it's heartbreaking for a child you've invested your life in to dick you over like this.

 

You'll have to give my forthrightness on this, but really my Sibling Bullshit Quotient has been filled enough for several lifetimes.

Edited by Iun

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@Iun, you are correct. I am the one who has it together, my Mum is the one giving "one more chance" all the time. My Dad is borderline in joining me in the "i don't care anymore" category, but won't as it is his daughter as well. And i perfectly understand that, it's just that how many chances can they give her. One day they'll both understand what's happening, and once that day arrives maybe, just maybe she'll change. As it's known, i'm in the boat of not caring about her, the boat of "sure, whatever you say". But i do care about my parents and i don't like seeing them upset for whatever reason.

 

What my sister doesn't see is that i am the one whom has to pick up the pieces, i'm the one whom has to see the damage what she's doing. And i'm the one who just can't put up with it much more. I sent her quite a firm text telling her what she is doing is ripping the family apart, because it's not just affecting those at home. And that will be it in terms of texting her, i won't reply back to her if she texts me.

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This is extremely personal, possibly too personal for a place like this, but I really feel like I need to get it off my chest. I know I should probably speak to someone (like my Dad) but I'm a very strange person and somehow find it easier talking to a group of friends and complete strangers.

 

Anyway, I first noticed this a few months ago (I may have posted something about it). I was feeling upset about absolutely nothing at a time that I should be happy. This has happened quite a few times since then, along with some pretty dark thoughts. It probably has roots in loneliness and I also feel kind of homesick (to the point where I've looked into moving back to where I grew up).

 

At first I decided to try and do something about it myself and in some regards, I have. I'm talking to some people a lot more and I even managed to loosen up at a work party. Even so, these feelings keep cropping back up. Yet at other times, there have been moments where I've felt better about myself (more than I have in a long time). These are very few.

 

There’s another element to this sudden and confusing mix of emotions, too. I spent a bit of time with one of my sister’s friends. I've known her for a while but never really spoke to her until recently. I quickly developed feelings for her and I've been talking to her quite a bit since (the fact that I've been having these conversations has been one of the good things I've experienced). I decided to ask her out, but my sister recommended that I should wait until after Christmas.

 

Anyway, because of how I've been feeling randomly upset (I've also been getting long bouts of very mild headaches, disrupting my concentration), I decided to see a doctor and talk about it and he prescribed me some anti-depressants, which I started on Saturday. One problem with these is that they often make you feel worse for the first week or so. Which is probably why it was stupid to do what I did yesterday: I asked the girl out. She wasn't interested. Still, I am glad that she’s still happy to chat with me as I still enjoy our conversations.

 

I'm just feeling pretty down and confused and I'm not entirely sure what to do. Hell, I've not even played many video games recently (I replayed Banjo-Kazooie but that’s all I've done since about 2 hours on Smash Bros. Wii U). I don’t really know what I want from this post, but I just felt like I needed to rant on about it somewhere.

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This is extremely personal, possibly too personal for a place like this,

 

Nothing is too personal for kNee; believe me I've tested it to the max.

 

Anyway, I first noticed this a few months ago (I may have posted something about it). I was feeling upset about absolutely nothing at a time that I should be happy. This has happened quite a few times since then, along with some pretty dark thoughts. It probably has roots in loneliness and I also feel kind of homesick (to the point where I've looked into moving back to where I grew up).

 

At first I decided to try and do something about it myself and in some regards, I have. I'm talking to some people a lot more and I even managed to loosen up at a work party. Even so, these feelings keep cropping back up. Yet at other times, there have been moments where I've felt better about myself (more than I have in a long time). These are very few.

 

There’s another element to this sudden and confusing mix of emotions, too. I spent a bit of time with one of my sister’s friends. I've known her for a while but never really spoke to her until recently. I quickly developed feelings for her and I've been talking to her quite a bit since (the fact that I've been having these conversations has been one of the good things I've experienced). I decided to ask her out, but my sister recommended that I should wait until after Christmas.

 

Anyway, because of how I've been feeling randomly upset (I've also been getting long bouts of very mild headaches, disrupting my concentration), I decided to see a doctor and talk about it and he prescribed me some anti-depressants, which I started on Saturday. One problem with these is that they often make you feel worse for the first week or so. Which is probably why it was stupid to do what I did yesterday: I asked the girl out. She wasn't interested. Still, I am glad that she’s still happy to chat with me as I still enjoy our conversations.

 

I'm just feeling pretty down and confused and I'm not entirely sure what to do. Hell, I've not even played many video games recently (I replayed Banjo-Kazooie but that’s all I've done since about 2 hours on Smash Bros. Wii U). I don’t really know what I want from this post, but I just felt like I needed to rant on about it somewhere.

 

Did all of this begin at the same time (i.e. as a result of) the feelings for sis's friend? If so then perhaps it will all pass in time. As just about anyone can attest unrequited love/feelings can produce some serious negative emotions and psychological state. I've personally found that after professing my long-held feelings (and subsequently being rejected) i've been able to move on as a result. Of course it hurts, but I think a lot of the previously felt anxiety was due to it all been unknown.

 

Either way, you've done the right thing by going to the doctor. Just stick with the anti-depressants and wait for them to take time - medicine isn't immediate. My Dad recently started taking them, and it's made a huge difference. He just seems to be able to put things in perspective more, whereas before he would get quite antsy and snap quite easily.

 

That's my tuppenceworth anyway. Feel free to (dis)regards it as you see fit.

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Around the same time, although the main trigger seems to be my sister's wedding and seeing her (my little sister) with a husband and some great kids while I have nothing.

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Around the same time, although the main trigger seems to be my sister's wedding and seeing her (my little sister) with a husband and some great kids while I have nothing.

 

Don't measure yourself by other people, it's never going to end well. Either we look at somebody and think that they have more than us (usually the case), or if we do look at somebody and think that we are better than them then we start to feel bad for thinking it and/or sad for that person. No good can come of comparing your life to others.

 

I'll tell you what you do have. A good job, with freedom and independence, and the ability to change your circumstances. You also have a family who you care about, and who cares about you, and a good set of friends. You have intelligence, wit and humour. And you have the rest of your life ahead of you.

 

Never underestimate or forget what you have.

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Don't measure yourself by other people, it's never going to end well. Either we look at somebody and think that they have more than us (usually the case), or if we do look at somebody and think that we are better than them then we start to feel bad for thinking it and/or sad for that person. No good can come of comparing your life to others.

 

I'll tell you what you do have. A good job, with freedom and independence, and the ability to change your circumstances. You also have a family who you care about, and who cares about you, and a good set of friends. You have intelligence, wit and humour. And you have the rest of your life ahead of you.

 

Never underestimate or forget what you have.

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